


Blow

by Deliana



Category: One Piece
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Drama, M/M, Other, Top/Bottom Versatile Roronoa Zoro/Vinsmoke Sanji
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-13
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-02-27 05:54:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 30
Words: 95,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22242163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deliana/pseuds/Deliana
Summary: When Sanji receives a letter his whole live takes an unexpected twist which might turn for good or… bad.ZoSan AU. Contains explicit sex scenes at the beginning.
Relationships: Roronoa Zoro/Vinsmoke Sanji
Comments: 109
Kudos: 136





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello and welcome to my first English fanfiction.  
> I can´t believe that I´m actually posting my first English ZoSan story since I´m not a native speaker, but I wanted to give it a try, to see if you like or not. I apologize for any grammar, spelling or other errors.  
> Nevertheless I hope you enjoy my story and accompany me on this little journey.  
> Zoro and Sanji might be a bit OOC in this one, but I hope you give this fanfiction a try.  
> I will upload a chapter every 14 days, the first two chapters are already available.  
> This chapter contains sex scenes so it you don´t feel comfortable with it, please don´t read it or skip the sex scene.  
> I´m also looking for a beta reader, who helps me to improve my story and checks for any grammar and spelling errors, so if you are interested please don´t hesitate to contact me. Thanks.

A familiar scent rose into his nose, slowly wrenching his consciousness from the depths of sleep, awakening him. The sun from the opposite window blinded him and forced him to close his eyes. Damned idiot, why did he always have to pull up the blinds while he was still asleep? There was nothing he hated more than waking up and getting the daylight right in his face when he woke up.

Zoro blinked at the sunlight and searched the bedroom for his clothes, but the idiot love cook had obviously already thrown his clothes into the laundry basket, so he had no choice but to pick out new clothes. Unless, of course...  
Zoro was grinning mischieviously and went to the bathroom which was next to their carton sized bedroom. Their dormitory was hardly big enough to fit a closet and a pole, but yet Zoro insisted they put a large bed in it, for their nightly adventures, though they were doing it all over the place. At least earlier. But since they were both working over and even in different shifts, to pay the mortgage for their house they were too tired to even kiss each other good night.   
First Zoro was unsure, whether to move in with this cleaning fanatic because he knew perfectly how lazy he was when it came to domestic tasks and how easily they got on each others nerves, but it was due to their little banters that their relationship was still so vivid and passionate.

Zoro couldn´t believe that they had been a couple for 7 years already and would probably have laughed at anyone who told him that they would become a couple, because they were like cats and dogs, always jumping at each others throats, so they were both surprised when they realized that they had fallen in love with each other without noticing it.   
Two years later, they finally decided two move together, so they bought this small house, so there were no neighbours above or beneath them who could get disturbed by their ridiculously quarrels or their loud sex noises. But even without their neighbours, living together wasn´t easy as they both were arguing a lot and even broke up, two years ago.  
At that time, they both realized how much they missed each other and their little banters, but they were too stubborn to admit it, so their friends intervened and encouraged them to reunite.  
Since then their relationship went up and down, but they were trying their best to make it work. Every fucking day. After Zoro took a shower, he tiptoed naked and dripping wet through the narrow corridor and down the creaking wooden steps to the kitchen, from which the epicurean scents that had woken him came.

The cook was standing with his back turned to Zoro at the stove, turning a pair of pancakes in the pan, when Zoro approached him from behind and pulled him into a wet embrace, rubbing his moist face against the cooks stubbly cheek.

„Ugh, you are soaking wet, get away from me! What is this all about anyway? Look at the mess, now I have to change into something dry. You know the old fart will kill me, if I´m late at work. I should have let you starve to death instead of making you breakfast!“ 

Zoro, knocked against the kitchen table by the cook's rough push, lowered his chin and pierced the cook with a lustful glare, which aroused the blonde.  
The moos head´s intentions were quite obvious to him as the tip of his penis was pointing at the cook, twitching in excitement.

„Five minutes, no more, understood?“

„I don´t need any longer to screw you around.“

The cook laughed as if he had just heard the best joke of his life and slowly approached the green-haired man, who was supporting himself on the edge of the table and stared at Sanji with dark eyes.  
Zoro knew that the cook was longing to sleep with him too and prepared for the coming attack. As soon as the cook was close enough, Zoro raised his legs in the air, holding onto the table and clutched the cook's hips to pull him close. A deep throaty growl crept out of the moss´s throat as their lips roughly collided and their tongues penetrated the other´s mouth in a wild dance.

„Fucking horny bastard…“ Sanji growled between kisses, impatiently fiddling with his zipper. When he finally managed to open his pants and they slid to his ankles, he grabbed Zoro's wrists and pushed him down onto the yet uncovered kitchen table. Sanji stripped off his pants and boxers with his feet and climbed onto the kitchen table that was just wide enough that he was able to put his knees next to Zoro´s body and sat down on him. Hopefully this table was more stable than the last one, which had collapsed under Zoro´s hard thrusts. After all, they couldn´t afford new furniture, everytime they had rough sex.

Sanji felt Zoro pounding against his butt, trying to get inside him, but he was not willing to let him fuck him that easily, because he was enjoying the fact that he was topping Zoro.  
The cook pressed the green haired man's wrists together to hold them with one hand while he reached behind him with the other and let his hand slide up and down on the man´s length.  
"You shouldn't have done that ..." Zoro said and lifted his pelvis, whereupon Sanji, who no longer had enough grip with one hand, slid forward over Zoro's bare body. He gnawed on his lower lip, trying to swallow moans of joy when he felt Zoro´s soft lips wrapping around his length and almost lost his wits when the moss´s tongue caressed his shaft.  
Seeing how much Zoro was savoring his cock with those irresistible lips of his, made his cock twitch with pleasure. He wished that he could crawl into this warm, welcoming mouth, as he was rubbing his hips against Zoro´s face, threatening him not to stop, if he didn´t want his skull get crushed with his legs. It had been so fucking long since they did it, that it certainly wouldn´t take him long to come into Zoro´s mouth.  
Screw the time limit, this was worth being yelled at by the old geezer. My calluses are getting calluses from all the overtime and for what? Well, they help pay off the house and save something for our next vacation, but what good was it if we didn´t spend time together anymore? What if we became estranged?

Sanji tried to forget about it and to enjoy this rare moment with his partner. His hips moved back and forth, adjusting to his boyfriend´s rhythm. Sanji accelerated his movements pushing back and forth into Zoro´s wet mouth, while the moss´s cock was twitching and pulsing between his fingers.  
Zoro moaned as little drops of lust ran down the cook´s hand. His eyes wandered over to the bottle of olive oil on the sideboard next to them.  
He wondered whether he should risk the cook´s anger and use the olive oil as lubricant, as he didn't want to go in dry, but changed his mind. He let his partner's shaft slid out of his mouth and raised up his upper body, stucking his index and middle finger in his mouth instead, in order to moisten them with his saliva. Sanji's cheeks flushed when he saw his partner sucking on his own fingers and couldn´t help but feel aroused even more.  
„Let me help you out…“ he muttered and lowered his mouth down to Zoro's hand and took in the moss´s fingers as deep as possible. Zoro groaned and his eyelids fluttered feverishly as he felt the cook's tongue wrap around his fingers.  
Impatiently he pulled out his fingers and pulled the cook's hips towards him and let both fingers disappear into the small hole. The cook hissed as the fingers moved inside him, which were rotating in circles, and leaned his forehead against his partner's shoulder.

„Shall I stop?“ Zoro whispered in his ear, barely suppressing his worries that he might hurt Sanji.

"No way! Go on!” he pleaded and Zoro slowly began to spread his fingers inside his lover. Sanji gasped at Zoro's mouth and buried his teeth in his lower lip. He couldn't wait any longer, he wanted him now, so he grabbed Zoro's wrist and pulled his fingers out.  
"Il est temps ..." he whispered in a hoarse voice and let Zoro slowly slide into him. How much he had missed his partner's heat, the feeling when his pelvis contracted around Zoro´s shaft. Their tongues circled around each other, adapting to the slow thrusts of Zoro, who enjoyed every second he could spend in Sanji. He was aware that the cook had to leave for work, but he just didn't want to let him go and held his hips in case he pulled away from him. 

"Fuck, Sanji!" Zoro exclaimed between clenched teeth, heading towards his climax, looking at Sanji with feverish eyes. When the cook looked back into those dark, lustful eyes, he wanted to see the moss in the eyes when he came and threatened Zoro not to take his eyes off him, if he didn´t want to get his balls cut off.

Zoro obeyed and moved his hand up and down Sanji's shaft. The cook clearly enjoyed Zoro´s strokes and sped up without taking his dark blue eyes away from his boyfriend. Zoro snorted and breathed intermittently when he finally came with a loud groan and trembled clinging to Sanji, while he felt the cook´s warm sperm pouring out on his lap.  
Zoro was completely out of breath, but grinning happily.

"That was more than five minutes," he teased, taking a knock in the ribs.

" Consider it an advance which I'll deduct from our next time.“

"Oh, so you are already thinking about next time? You can’t wait for it, can you? ”

"Don't be silly!" Sanji shouted, but his crimson ears couldn't fool him.

Sanji struggled to get on his feet. He would have liked to have breakfast with Zoro, but he was already late and didn't want to risk getting fired.  
After Sanji had left, Zoro stretched contentedly and thought about what to do with the rest of the time until he had to go to work, when his eyes fell on the neighbour next door, who was probably on her way to her car. Zoro didn't like her, because she never missed an opportunity to report them to the police. He wondered whether she had already reported them for public nuisance, but could not remember and decided to greet his neighbour and invite her for a coffee. Naked, of course.

"Good morning!" he shouted happily to her, whereupon she turned and gave him a disapproving look, which suddenly turned to horror when she saw that he was completely naked. 

"Well, how about you join me for some early morning exercise," he asked, his hips rotating as he stretched his hands behind his head. 

Her jaw dropped as she stared at Zoro's circling pelvis and his steel abs, which shimmered wet from the sweat and Sanji's sperm, reminding him of a tomato with her red glowing head.

"Don´t come closer… you… pervert!“ she gasped without taking her eyes off Zoros swinging thing as she headed backwards for her car.

Zoro could hardly contain himself with laughter and even got side stings from laughing.  
This day promised to get better and better. As he went back into the house, he looked over the letters he had just fished out of the mailbox. Most of them were bills, of course, so he put them back behind the others, because he didn´t want to loose his good mood. His eyebrows narrowed and he pinched his eyes in disbelief as he held a letter from a notary which was obviously addressed to the cook. He would have loved to open it immediately, but he respected his partner's privacy. He would find out soon enough what was in the letter and put it, together with the other letters, on the drawer in the hallway, which was right in the entrance area, and took a shower for the second time that day.

Sanji was equally surprised when he came home in the evening and discovered the notary's letter among the bills. What would a notary want from him? Was it about... an inheritance? But who was going to bequeath him anything? Apart from his old man, he had no other relatives. And the old man was still quite lively this morning when he had made a fuss of him in front of the whole crew, because he was an hour late and as a punishment let him do the dirty work all day. Even the satisfaction that Sanji had managed to spit into his father's lunch unnoticed did not comfort him and so his mood was more than bad when he came home in the evening. Unfortunately he couldn't take his bad mood out on Zoro either, as he was at work and so he had no choice but to take his anger out on dinner. His mood didn't get any better when he had to wash the dirty encrusted dishes that the moss head had left behind from breakfast and so he was already in his eighties when he angrily opened the mail to look at the contents. The letter from the notary contained an invitation to a reading of wills. Sanji's eyes continued to wander over the letter as suddenly a name came up. His hands trembled.

No, that couldn't be ... It was impossible ... he talked himself off, shaking his head. The tremor turned into an uncontrolled shaking and Sanji's head sank down to the letter as hot tears ran down his face.

When Zoro came home in the middle of the night, he found Sanji sitting on a chair in the kitchen, holding a letter in his hand, staring at it incessantly, and asked him what he was doing. The cook, however, did not answer, but kept staring at the letter. Zoro got scared and asked anxiously what was going on. The cook lifted his head up a bit and murmured three little words. Words that would change both their lives forever.

"Nami is dead."

To be continued


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised here´s chapter 2.  
> I will upload the next chapter in two weeks.

Time could be an odd thing: sometimes it felt as if it only lasted for a blink of an eyelid and sometimes... it dragged on as endlessly as chewing gum.   
Like their hour-long drive to the notary. Since the cook had received this letter, he had hardly talked to him, only the most necessary things, and since then he had constantly hidden his eyes behind those dark, mirrored sunglasses, which apparently hid all his emotions and surrounded him like an invisible shield. Zoro could understand how the cook felt, he had lost a friend, too, but... he wished he would romp, scream, do something else than just keep quiet. Anything was better than this silence that built up like a wall between them and grew from day to day.  
He glanced briefly at the cook, who was sitting in the passenger seat and was polluting the car with his cigarette smoke.

"Could you at least keep yourself and this coffin nail out of the open window before I die of passive smoking?" Zoro snarled at him, who couldn't bear the silence any longer.  
The blond opened the window wordlessly and blew the smoke out.

"You have to take the exit in 500 meters," the cook reminded him and kept on smoking.  
Zoro wanted to reply when the navigation system answered and confirmed that Zoro had to take the downhill run in 500 meters.

"Did you and that talking turd conspire against me? I know what to do without you and that annoying blabbermouth"   
Actually he should be angry, but he was rather relieved that the cook had finally broken his silence, even if it meant making fun of him.

"Too late." Sanji answered and pointed with his chin to the downhill slope they had just passed.

"Shut up!" He said and immediately regretted his words, but he could not take them back. The last thing he wanted was for the cook to retreat and fall back into this silence. Exhausted, he let his shoulders sink and his upper body shrank before his own eyes.

"Sorry, I didn't mean that. I don't want you to shut up. The last few days have been quiet enough. Too quiet."  
Zoro felt the cook's gaze, but he tried to concentrate on the traffic. And to resist the impulse to throw this electronic, annoying chatterbox out the window. Maybe he should ask Ussop how to change its voice. Even the sound of fingernails sliding across a blackboard sounded better to him.

"That bad, huh? I'm sorry. It's just..."

"I know. I still can't believe it either. How long has it been?"

"Two years."

Zoro shook his head in bewilderment. So it had been two years since they had last heard from Nami. Two years since she suddenly disappeared without saying goodbye or to touch base with them. No one knew where she had gone or how she was doing, not even her best friend Vivi. Of course they had tried to find her, but all the traces had gone nowhere, it was as if she had been swallowed up by the ground. Especially Sanji had suffered from her sudden disappearance, even though he hadn't shown it, but Zoro had known what he was like inside and had tried to be there for him as best he could. One of them had to be strong.

Although it might be wiser to keep both hands on the steering wheel, he still put his right hand on his partner's and stroked his thumb gently over the back of the cook's hand for the rest of the ride.  
When they were almost at their destination and passed a small rest area hidden by trees, Sanji suddenly asked to drive to the rest area. Zoro obeyed and turned onto the abandoned parking lot. Obviously not many people found their way here, which probably had something to do with the fact that you could hardly see it from the road. As soon as Zoro had turned off the engine, the cook grabbed him by the wrist and dragged him rudely over to his side.

"What the hell?!" Zoro asked, but he still let him drag him astride. The cook leaned with his forehead against Zoro's shoulder and crossed his arms behind the green-haired man's back.

I'm sorry that I've been so distant and quiet lately. I don't know how you put up with me sometimes." Sanji whispered the last sentence at Zoro's neck. Tenderly, the blond man's lips brushed across the green stubbles of his partner´s jaw, whispering the words   
I´m sorry“ over and over again with a deep French accent, kissing slowly towards Zoro's chin.   
The green-haired man grabbed the blond man's shoulders and pushed him so far away that he could look him in the eyes. The Moss head´s voice sounded worried and his eyes looked concerned into the cook's.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?"

The cook lowered his eyes and stared down at his lap.

"Maybe, but... since Nami's death, I feel like a part of me has died, too. "I feel no hunger, thirst, sorrow nor joy. "Nothing. I feel like I'm dead. And life? It just goes on as if nothing happened, as if Nami didn't exist and I..."

The remaining words were choked by Zoro's lips, which suddenly pressed themselves onto his mouth, making him forget everything he had to say until a moment ago. Hastily he loosened Sanji's seat belt and pushed the backrest backwards by pressing a button until Sanji was lying under Zoro. 

Impatiently they tore off their clothes, loosening their lips from each other for only a few seconds at a time to either undress or take a breath before their lips merged again and their fingers slid over each other's bodies. Sanji was glad that Zoro understood his need for tenderness and closeness and that he put his concerns aside for him to feel better. The green-haired man might have trouble expressing his feelings in words, but his body spoke all the more clearly and he cursed himself for not noticing that Zoro was suffering at least as much from the loss as he was. After they had freed themselves from their last clothes, Zoro took his penis and pressed it to his own.

The green-haired man's rough fingers sent small electric shocks through his body. Sanji buried his face on Zoro's shoulder and his teeth in Zoro's warm skin. Even after seven years, they still coveted each other with an incredible intensity and passion that was rekindled each time their bare bodies touched. With his free hand, Zoro clasped his partner's jaw and with his thumb he pulled his partner's lower jaw down and slid his tongue into the blond man's mouth, who wriggled under him with lust. Zoro felt the first drops of lust roll down his fingers and heard the cook whisper his name.

He opened his eyes and detached his lips from the cook to look at him. The blones dark blue eyes looked at him questioningly and with a silent nod Zoro straightened up with his upper body to reach the glove compartment behind him. It didn't take him long to find the lubricant they always kept there and spread a generous amount on his partner's cock before he spread something on his middle and index finger and made both disappear into himself. Sanji watched Zoro finger himself and felt his penis twitch at the sight.

He straightened up with his upper body and grabbed Zoro by the wrist. His dark blue eyes followed Zoro´s, who were watching Sanji's tongue slide up from the middle of Zoro´s forearm to his wrist as he became more excited.

„Tu es très sexy!“ Sanji whispered to him in a deep, smoky voice and bit tenderly at the heel of Zoro's hand. With his finger he made a circling movement to signal him to turn around. Zoro obeyed and sat on him again with his back to Sanji. The cook's fingers slid across Zoro's neck and his lips whispered in a hoarse voice in French what he would like to do to him as he slowly penetrated him, stroking Zoro's shaft with his other hand.  
"Je t'aime Marimo, je t'aime tellement..." he whispered to his ear and with each thrust penetrated Zoro a little deeper, who buried his fingers in Sanji's thighs and gasped uncontrollably. Sanji pulled his teeth gently on Zoro's earrings and stroked his fingers over the skin behind Zoro's ear.

"Say my name..." he whispered almost hoarsely but Zoro annoyed him shaking his head. With a jerky thrust Sanji penetrated him and grinned contentedly as the swordsman cursed and hissed, contracting around Sanji's shaft.

"Bastard!" he gasped, but Sanji ignored his friend's ranting and turned his head towards him so that he could press a kiss directly onto the corner of Zoro's mouth.

"Say... my... name..." he ordered again and pushed as deeply as possible, while his hand slid down to Zoro's hips and wrapped around his hard belly. Sanji quickened his pace slightly and slid his hand between Zoro's legs until he found what he was looking for and cuddled his palm to Zoro's testicles.

"Fuck!" pressed Zoro out as Sanji gently kneaded and massaged them. He felt the swordsman would soon reach his climax and accelerated his strokes so he could come with him. 

"Shit Sanji!" Zoro shouted now and poured himself on Sanji's lap who followed him after a few more thrusts. Exhausted, Sanji lowered his arms and leaned back on the seat which was still in the horizontal position. Both breathed heavily and Zoro bent over to take the handkerchiefs out of the glove compartment and turned around to hand the cook a handkerchief as well.

"Hey, what's going on?" he asked when he saw that the cook covered his eyes with his right arm and turned around on Sanji's lap to get a better look at him.

Zoro bent down to the cook as he came up out of the blue with his upper body, his arms wrapped around Zoro and pressed him against him. Tenderly the cook breathed a few kisses on his neck and buried his face in crook of Zoro´s neck. The latter didn't know what to say or what to do and gave the cook the time he needed to stop shaking and until the tears that had been running down Zoro's body were gone.   
Since he had found him sitting in the kitchen, he locked up the pain and sadness inside him and had not allowed himself a single tear in Zoro´s presence, but unlike him, the cook had to let his feelings out to prevent them from suddenly breaking out and coming over him. He was the emotional one in their relationship and he loved him for it, because through him he had experienced for the first time in his life what love was.  
When they finally reached the notary's office half an hour later, a stout man with horn-rimmed glasses and chin beard opened the door for them, his bald head shining like the surface of the moon in the light of the modern chrome ceiling lamps.   
The man, who introduced himself to them as Alfred Pennyworth, briefly squeezed the hands of both of them and expressed his condolences to them before inviting them into his office. Sanji was quite astonished when he saw the modern furnishings and admired the large panoramic windows behind the mahogany desk which made the room appear bright despite its black walls. The white marble floor and the white ceiling gave the room additional brightness.

After everyone had sat down, they heard from Mr. Pennyworth that Nami was very sick and near to death and therefore returned to her old home about 2 weeks ago to clear up some very last matters, like her last will and testament.  
Since Nami had no other relatives except her sister, who had died about 10 years ago, she had appointed Sanji as sole administrator of a trust fund she had set up, from which he could withdraw a certain amount every month. Sanji's eyes, which grew bigger and bigger during their conversation, interrupted the notary at some point and asked him how much money was being talked about and got wide eyes when the notary told him something about 1 million.  
Zoro, who was just drinking a glass of water, spat it across the mahogany table and coughed, but that wasn't all, because Nami had one last request: that he take care of their daughter.

"Daugh… ter?!" Sanji stuttered and loosened the tie that was tying his neck.

"Yeah, right. I'm sorry you had to find out this way, but Mrs. Ekström unfortunately passed away before she ... is everything all right with you? You look very pale."  
Sanji rolled his eyes and collapsed in his chair in front of his partner and the notary.

To be continued


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! :)
> 
> I finished the new chapter earlier as expected. I´d like to thank all you who left me a kudo, appreciate it a lot. <3  
> See you in two weeks!

After the funeral the mourners gathered at Sanji and Zoro's place. Only Nami's closest friends had come, because she had no one else left but them. Sanji had outdone himself as usual, but no one was in the mood to eat. Except Luffy, who had piled the food on his plate and was chewing loudly.

"How can you be so greedy?!" Sanji said disapprovingly clicking with his tongue and handed Vivi her cup of coffee which she enclosed with both hands as if it was some kind of Holy Grail.

"It would be a waste to throw it away. You always say we shouldn't throw away anything. Besides... Nami would understand."

Sanji replied, but either Luffy didn't understand because Sanji was mumbling to himself, or he simply didn't care because he was too busy stuffing food into himself. Sanji wondered if he was breathing at all, when Luffy suddenly gasped for air and hit his fist against his chest. 

"Quick, we need a doctor, he's suffocating," Chopper cried who was sitting next to Luffy and frantically slapped his flat hand right between Luffy's shoulder blades.

"You're a doctor!" they shouted back at him and Chopper blushed when he remembered that he actually was a doctor. Quick as lightning he stood behind Luffy and wrapped his arms around his friend who was already bluish and kept pressing his hands on Luffy's abdomen to get out what was blocking his windpipe. The culprit flew through the room and right into Zoro´s face, who was sitting opposite Luffy and watching the spectacle head-shaking. Cursing, the green-haired man held his aching nose and jumped to his feet.

"Damn it, watch where you are spitting! Do you want us to bury someone else today?"

Sanji circled the table to look at his partner's nose but Zoro pushed him away rudely and assured him that everything was fine, although Sanji was sure he saw tears in his eyes.  
Happy to be alive still, Luffy patted his friend and lifesaver on the back, beaming from ear to ear. Chopper struggled to hold himself upright, as his friend's blows caused him to tilt forward again and again and assured him that it was not worth mentioning, as it was his duty as a doctor to help people.

After the general excitement had subsided, Vivi asked what was happening with Nami's daughter. Sanji was grateful that she had not said "your daughter", because he still couldn´t get used to the thought of having a child. He couldn´t believe that she hadn´t told him about their daughter and had run away.   
He was torn between his anger because she had kept his paternity secret from him and the sadness that she was now dead and her daughter would now grow up without a mother, probably the only caregiver she had and the thought made his shoulders and head drop.

"I don't know... I don't even know if I should take her in... I mean... she doesn't even know me..."

"What are you talking about? She's your daughter, so you have to take care of her," Luffy said in his usual blunt and direct manner.

"I am a complete stranger to her! What do you want me to tell her? Hello, I'm your daddy and you're going to live with me from now on?!"

"Who says that she's really your daughter? Maybe Nami's trying to plant a cuckoo bird on you? Maybe the real father doesn't want to have anything to do with the child and that's why she's trying to sell the kid to you?"

The vein on Sanji's forehead began to pulse menacingly and his face turned red with rage.

"Have you been smoking moss? Nami wouldn't do that!" Sanji wanted to grab Zoro by the collar, who built up grimly in front of him, but Ussop intervened and separated the two before things got out of control.

"Please, there's no point in us beating each other up. We are all on edge. I would suggest we pack the food, help Sanji with cleaning up and then everyone goes home," Vivi suggested diplomatically and tried to smooth the waves as best as possible. 

The tension between Sanji and Zoro was palpable, which was no wonder after all they had been through and what they had experienced. First Nami's death and then the sudden fatherhood and the money blessing that came with it... It had all been a little too much lately. But that wasn't all, because an even bigger problem hovered over their heads like a sword of Damocles.

Sighing, she rose and began to carry the first plates into the kitchen. An hour later everything was tidy and one after another, they left the house, except for Vivi who offered to stay overnight.  
Sanji gratefully accepted the offer. He seemed downright relieved that she was staying, because he probably he didn't want to be left alone with Zoro, who watched her with his arms crossed over his chest as she kissed her husband Kohza goodbye.

"Are you sure you want to be alone with them? There's nothing you can do anyway, it's up to the two of them," Kohza whispered to her and held his arms protectively around her hips, as if he wanted to lift her up and kidnap her.

"Don't worry, they won't hurt me. Besides... I feel like I'm going to let them down if I leave," she whispered back, reluctantly releasing herself, but not without giving him one last, long kiss that made her decision falter for a moment. 

She shouldn't kiss him like that, for it made saying goodbye all the more difficult and her longing to kiss him again even worse, but she was powerless against those irresistible lips that turned her knees into Jell-O even after two years of marriage.   
Quickly she pushed him out the door and closed the door behind him before she would change her mind. She could feel her friends looks and turned to them with an embarrassed smile. 

"Are you sure you wouldn't rather go home with Kohza? After all, he only has two days left before he has to go back to some war zone and who knows when he'll get his next leave.“

"It's all right, we still have plenty of time. Besides, I have to practice weaning myself, so that it will be easier to say goodbye when he will be gone for months again," Vivi assured him and tried to hide her sadness as best she could behind her fake smile.

"I don't know how you manage it, I would be torn apart by saying goodbye to my beloved and not knowing if I would even see him again..."

Sanji bit his lips at the last words. The feelings of guilt he felt for his rash and tactless words were clearly written on his face. Vivi knew he didn't mean it and as soon as she had crossed the room and stood in front of him, she stood on her toes to give him a kiss on the cheek. Her hand stroked his cheek tenderly as she spoke and looked up at him lovingly.

"Stop trying to make yourself feel more guilty. You're right it's hard, but I know that he will always come back to me, no matter how dangerous the enemy is. And you know why? Because he's the best soldier there is and because he's always very calm and careful. Besides... I threatened to kill him if he didn't come home. And now come..." she said, dragging her friends by the hands.

"We're playing strip poker. If I can't see my husband naked, I can at least see your two gorgeous bodies."

When Sanji later came into the bedroom to let himself fall into bed exhausted, he was amazed when Zoro put on his jogging shoes.

"You still want to go jogging? At this hour?"

"I´ve got to get out. Clear my head." 

Sanji nodded and reminded him to take his cell phone with him. Zoro growled and replied that he didn't need it.

"Oh yeah? And what if you get lost again? How am I supposed to track you with my mobile phone then, huh?"

I always find my way back."

"Yes, but when? Last time you were gone for seven hours. I even had to take extra time off to look for you."

"I had lost track of time!"

"And obviously, you had crossed the city line! I mean, how can you walk 20 kilometers and not realize you've landed in another city?!"

"Hey, is everything okay? I can hear you downstairs," said Vivi, who carefully pushed her head through the crack of the door and peered into the room. Immediately, the two quarrelsome cocks let go of each other. 

Angrily, Zoro grabbed his cell phone and stuffed it into the small pocket of his jogging jacket sewn onto his sleeve, where he always kept it. Roughly he pushed past the blonde and headed for the door without saying goodbye.

"Keep an eye on your battery and come back before it runs out," Sanji yelled at him, but the green haired man gave him the middle finger before he disappeared through the door.

"I love you too, idiot!" said Sanji and tore his shirt open furiously, stuffing it into the laundry basket. 

Vivi didn't know if she should stay or go, but decided to stay and entered the bedroom after she heard the front door close behind Zoro.  
Her feet wandered across the soft, cream-colored carpet towards Sanji, who twitched when he felt his friend's hand on his shoulder.

"It´s not easy for him to accept the fact that you have a daughter. And with Nami, of all people."

Sanji lowered his shoulders and sighed.

"That's when I made myself a nice soup. Now I don't even know how to get out of it. Do you think he'd raise the girl with me if I took her home?"

Vivi hesitated before she answered, because she knew that Zoro didn't want any children, that's why he had even broken up with Sanji and had reunited with him because he gave in and decided not to adopt a child. But now that he had a biological child... he would certainly not allow her to be raised by strangers or to grow up in a home. He knew that, and Zoro knew it too. The question was... how did they get along? Would Zoro accept Sanji´s fatherhood for the sake of the little one and take her in, even if she was Nami and Sanji's child? 

After all, she was their friend, even their best friend, which made things even worse. She remembered all too well how hard it had been for Zoro to get involved with a bisexual man like Sanji, but his feelings had finally won over his concerns and after a long back and forth he had finally got into this relationship, whic,h albeit it was bumpy, went quite well and Sanji, despite his weakness for the female sex, had never got involved with anyone else but Zoro, although it was hard for him and he caught himself flirting with women often enough, but Zoro was willing to overlook this as long as it remained platonic. And now this...  
Vivi's eyes filled with tears as she saw the pain in the dark blue eyes and heard the trembling in his voice as he spoke to her.

"I want to take her with me and try to make up for the time I missed, but... I'm afraid I have to choose between her and him. I don't want to lose him again, Vivi..." Sanji said and held her close. She could feel his tears in the crook of her neck and felt her own tears coming up, but she tried to calm down because he needed her now, needed comfort.

"He may not always be able to show it but ... He loves you just as much, Sanji. Just give him some time to digest all this and get used to the situation. Just like he got used to living with you. I'm sure you two will get along. You can try her for a few hours at the beginning, see how she copes with the new environment and especially with the situation. Maybe even a whole weekend. And most of all... you should give her time to get to know you before you tell her who you are. She's still dealing with her mother's death. I'll help you guys any way I can, of course. You'll see, it'll be fine."

Vivi stroked his back reassuringly and hoped that she was right.

The cemetery caretaker made his usual tour of the cemetery, where at this late hour young people liked to sneak onto the property to drink, smoke pot, or hold some kind of rituals.  
But the administration did not want to put up an electric fence around the grounds, in case that someone might be crazy enough to jump over the fence and suffer an electric, in the worst case even fatal, blow.   
So it was up to him alone to guard the cemetery. He loved the peace and quiet and after his tour he liked to spend his time looking up at the sky on clear nights, looking at the stars. He was horrified by the hectic and stressful daily routine of those who worked during the day, so he consciously chose the job of a night watchman, which, although it didn't pay much, was just enough to make a living and enjoyed the little things in life, like starry skies, his favorite TV shows and the food his mother cooked for him. It had been 20 years since he had moved out, yet he still came to her for breakfast and lunch, because since his father died she had no one and was happy to be able cook for someone other than herself. 

So at least he didn't have to cook for himself and saved money that he would otherwise have to spend on food. The only food he had in the fridge was a six-pack of beer and the leftovers his mother always gave him so that he could eat at work in the evening. For this purpose he had bought a microwave oven especially for him, which he kept in a small shed.

Suddenly the glow of the flashlight that had just been jumping from stone to stone froze and stopped at the devastated grave. Cursing, he stared at the beautiful flowers or what was left of them, because there were loose petals and torn off flower heads all over the place. Even in front of the wreaths the vandal/s had not stopped, but had picked them all to pieces and torn the ribbons apart. Who on earth would do such a sick thing? he wondered. And especially when? How had he got in? Was he... maybe even still here? 

He waved the flashlight back and forth, but he couldn't see anything suspicious, so he directed the light of the flashlight back to the grave and shook his head. It was incomprehensible to him how anyone could devastate a grave like this, especially since the dead woman had only been buried today. He directed the beam at the torn ribbon where her name, date of birth and date of death were written and sighed as he calculated her age. Far too young to die, he thought sadly and walked back the way he had come.

To be continued


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This early chapter is a thank you for all the very sweet reviews and for the recommendations I´ve received.  
> Thank you to VisitorNo18, Midnight_Hunter16, MissMacca and my anonymous guest. I really appreciate it and I can´t express enough how much your words mean to me! <3
> 
> See you in two weeks! :) (This time it will really take 2 weeks, because I have several options and I´m still unsure which option to choose.)

"What do you think?" Sanji asked, holding out a black suit with a vest and a striped orange shirt.

"Hmm, a little formal, don't you think? Or do you want to apply for this daddy job?" asked Ussop, who suspiciously inspected the suit.

"You are right! Argh, it's enough to drive you wild! I have so many things and yet I don't know what to wear!"

"Speaking to the choir, sister!" shouted Perona and Bonney and stretched out their arms to give Sanji a high five, but he didn't reply because he was too busy finding the right outfit among all the clothes.  
Maybe he should rummage in Zoro's wardrobe? Although he wouldn't find anything there either, except sportswear, casual clothes and a suit he wore for all occasions, although he'd been forcing him to get a new one for years. 

"How about this combination?" Suggesting Vivi, Sanji was presented with a dark blue sweater with a plait pattern and black jeans that emphasized his long legs.  
Almost reverently he took the sweater and swallowed the lump that formed in his throat. He had forgotten that he still had it, because he had worn it only once before. At the last New Year's Eve party he had celebrated together with Nami. It had been a Christmas present from her and perfectly matched his dark blue eyes as she had assured him.  
Maybe his daughter liked it as well and decided to try it on. Vivi, Perona and Bonney were over the moon and showered him with compliments, while Ussop limited himself to nodding eagerly, holding up his right thumb.

"You're just too cute, my beauties!" Sanji said, breathing a kiss on the back of each lady's hand. As if he was expecting a kiss as well, Ussop also held out his hand to him and tinkled seductively with his thick, dark lashes, but all he got from Sanji was a slap on the back of his hand.

"I only kiss women!" he shouted at him and got a lewd grin from Ussop.

"What about Zoro?"

Sanji turned his head so far away from Ussop that he could not see his bright red cheeks.

"Those are more slips on his face."

"Then Zoro must have a very slippery skin, as often as you slip on his lips," Perona remarked with a wink and regretted her comment when she saw the sad look in his eyes. 

"I'd love to slip on him again," he confessed sadly and stroked his thumbs over the sweater he was still holding in his hand. Since he knew he was a father, Zoro avoided him and any attempt at tenderness, and although Sanji could understand his behavior, it still hurt to be constantly shunned. Maybe a little weekend trip would help to talk in peace and to get closer again, but unfortunately both of them were so busy with their jobs that a short vacation was out of the question at the moment.

"Come on, it´s time for ar group hug" Perona asked the others and walked towards Sanji with outstretched arms, who soon found himself in a human ball of wool, made of arms and bodies. Since he couldn't move anything but his head, he simply lowered it onto Vivi and Perona's heads and enjoyed this moment of intimacy, even though Ussop's hand was a bit too close to his butt for his taste.

Two days later the day of the first meeting had come. The director of the home where his daughter was staying had sounded very sympathetic on the phone and was sincerely pleased that Sessa had relatives after all. So that was her name. Sessa Ekström.  
Sanji thought the name sounded nice and was so nervous that he used two packs of chewing gum because he wanted to stop smoking so as not to stink of cigarette smoke. He had also avoided perfume and after shave so as not to frighten her off with any intense odors and had avoided any food that would cause bad breath, after all he wanted to make the best possible impression. He almost felt like he was on a first date. At least emotionally, because he was very nervous and his empty stomach felt queasy as he walked up the gravel path. Damn, maybe he should have tried to eat something, but he just couldn't eat from excitement. 

His eyes wandered around in admiration, soaking up the various impressions. It was a very beautiful home made of sandstone and with floor-length windows, located on a huge outdoor area where dozens of children of different ages were playing on playground equipment, playing catch or just digging in the sandbox, seemingly frolicsome and cheerful, quite different from what he had imagined. His heartbeat quickened at the thought that one of these children might be his own, and he was on the lookout for little two-year-old girls with blond or red hair. A few may fall into that category at least as far as hair color was concerned, but they were too old and so he went inside the building a little disappointed.   
The entrance area consisted of a corridor that went in both directions and a big staircase that went up to the upper floor. The walls were in a light blue tone, paved with children's pictures and the floor was made of light grey laminate. In a small glazed room to his right sat a strongly-built man who looked up from his newspaper and inquired who he was. Sanji told him his name and that he had come to visit his daughter. The dark-haired man stared at Sanji for what seemed like an eternity before he finally picked up the phone to announce Sanji's visit to the director of home as he told him.

The conversation seemed to go on forever and with every minute that passed, Sanji became more nervous and impatient. Thousands of thoughts and possible scenarios rushed through his mind and made him increasingly insecure. What if she didn't like him? What if the meeting was disastrous and he screwed everything up? What if she got scared of him? What if the situation between them was tense? He had already experienced antipathy at first sight and it was his greatest fear. He wished Zoro was with him, but unfortunately he had to work and hadn't been able to take time off. At least that's what he claimed, but in view of his dismissive nature lately, Sanji wasn't sure if he wouldn't avoid an encounter with her. He couldn't even blame him, he probably wouldn't be comfortable meeting his partner's child that he had fathered with his best friend.

The doorman told Sanji that he was already expected and showed him the way. Sanji walked through a wide corridor and read the signs that were attached to the walls next to the doors. As he read the words Office Home Management, he stopped and knocked before entering. The head of the home had already got up from her desk when he entered and came towards him to shake his hand. Her bright smile and warm brown eyes were almost disarming and Sanji relaxed a bit in her presence, especially when he heard her pleasant, unagitated voice that sounded like warm honey in his ears and for the first time that day he smiled and returned her gentle handshake.

"Mr. Vinsmoke, how good of you to come. I already told Sessa you were coming. I suppose you'll want to see her now."

"Yes, that would be wonderful," Sanji replied in a sugar-sweet voice, almost enraptured by her heart-shaped face and shoulder-length hair that poured over her delicate shoulders like liquid caramel. She was really an adorable angel and Sanji had to pull himself together not to get into raptures and flirt with her uninhibitedly as he usually did when he met a beautiful woman.

"Before we leave, you should know that we have not yet told Sessa who you are because we felt that she should first get to know you carefully before she finds out that you are her father. After all, she's been through a lot, as you well know."

"Yes, I know. And I promise I won't tell her anything, for now."

"I'm very pleased. Sessa is a sensitive, shy girl who finds it very difficult to open up to strangers, even we haven't been able to get through to her yet, so don't be worried if she is a bit distant."

"Don't worry, I won't force anything and proceed as gently as possible. After all, I don't want to scare her. Tell me something about her, because unfortunately I know nothing about her. To tell you the truth... I... myself only recently found out I'm her father.

"I know that. Social Services has already informed me about Sessa's situation. Also about the circumstances in which she was found..." said the director of the home and suddenly a sad undertone was heard in her voice. Sanji sensed that she was trying to tell him something, that she was looking for the right words and an uneasy feeling that something was wrong came over him.

"I don't want to worry her, but there's something I'd rather tell them in person than over the phone. When... Sessa was found lying on the bed next to her dead mother in embryonic position and cuddled up to her. She was not responsive at all, to be honest, she hasn't spoken a word since the incident, so we don't know how far her speech development is. The only thing we know for sure is that she was dehydrated and hadn't eaten for a long time. She had not eaten for at least two days, when the police found her after a neighbour reported that he could hear a loud whimpering noise from the neighbouring flat.“

The longer he listened to her, the bigger his eyes grew, staring stunned at the director while he listened to her terrible descriptions. He tried to repress the terrible images that inevitably burned into his head and suppress the emotions that were seething inside him and threatening to overwhelm him. 

The director of home assured him that a child psychologist was already taking care of her to help her process the experience, but it was little comfort for Sanji who could not believe what she had gone through in such a short time. First the move to a foreign environment, then Nami's illness, which certainly hadn't escaped her attention and which had led to her mother´s death, and finally, as if that wasn't bad enough for a small child, she had lain next to her mother's dead body for two days. His throat tightened and his voice trembled slightly when he asked the director of home to bring him to her. The common room was less than three doors away and his heart was beating so loudly that he thought he could hear it.   
Finally he would see her, meet his child for the first time and he was more nervous than ever before in his life. Although he would have preferred to leave after what he had experienced, to process what he had heard and to try to control himself again, he wanted to finally meet her and find out if she really was his daughter, because Zoro's words still buzzed through his head that Nami had put a cuckoo child under him and that it was someone else's child, even if he didn't believe it. Nevertheless, he wanted to satisfy his curiosity. I wonder what she looked like, more like him or more like Nami. Hopefully she took more after her mother, he prayed, and followed the director of home through the door into a large room filled with toys and bathed in a warm yellow by the incoming daylight from the large windows.

The room was completely empty, seemed abandoned at first sight, until his gaze fell on a small figure sitting at a table, absorbed in her work. Sanji wanted to go to her, ordered his feet to move, but they seemed to disobey.  
Only when the director of home, who noticed his hesitation, put her hand on his shoulder and nodded to him, did he dare to approach her. The sight of her red-blonde hair tied his throat, shining like gold in the sunlight and his pulse racing when he suddenly stood next to her and could look at her more closely. She was wearing pink dungarees and a white T-shirt, the same color as her headband and the slippers that adorned her tiny feet. Apparently she was painting something with crayon, even though he couldn't tell what it was, because the tears that he had so bravely tried to suppress so far finally shot into his eyes. The director was shocked when he suddenly fell to his knees, his hands buried in his thighs, but she said nothing and gave him the time he needed to digest this encounter.  
Quite contrary to Sessa, who was still painting her picture and apparently hadn't noticed the arrival of the stranger. To distract her from her work, she knelt down to the little girl and carefully took the pencil from her hand.

"Sessa, dear. The visitor I told you about is here. Mr. Vinsmoke."

Sanji held his breath as she finally looked up from her work and looked at him. The sight of her deer-brown eyes hit him like lightning and made him flinch involuntarily. Her eyes, nose and face were clearly Nami's, but the mouth and especially the eyebrows were clearly his. Zoro liked to call them the two question marks or eyebrow curls, for which he sometimes liked to drown him in the toilet bowl. But unlike him, she didn't cover them with a pony, but showed openly and he wondered what Nami was trying to do with her, because she had to put up with enough teasing.  
And yet... he was overwhelmed.

"Hello... Sessa..." he croaked hoarsely because the sight of her literally left him speechless. Her brown eyes curiously watched him and as she stretched out her fingers, Sanji bent down to her. He couldn't believe that she actually touched him, holding his breath as her fingers touched his forehead.

Very slowly her little fingers stroked his skin and ran their fingers across the contours of his left eyebrow. How he would love to snuggle up to her little hand, which smelled of baby powder and soap, the most heavenly scent he had ever smelled, but he didn't dare, for fear she might pull her hand back.  
He never dreamed that she would touch him, that of all people his eyebrow would help him to make contact with her. His fingernails clawed even tighter into his thighs, because the need to take her in his arms was so overwhelming that he could hardly control himself and suddenly longed for a cigarette.

"I'm... sorry."

He jumped up before the director and Sessa could see his tears, which were now running down his face, and stormed out of the room and towards the exit, past the children who were curiously looking at him. When he finally found a corner behind the house where there were no children, he rummaged in his pockets for his cigarette pack and lighter. His hands trembled so much that the cigarette pack fell out of his hand and the contents were spread over the floor. Cursing, he crouched down to pick it up, but his hands just wouldn't obey him with excitement.

"Fuck!" he cursed and had to support himself with his hands to keep from falling over.  
His whole body was shaking and he couldn't stop crying.

Why? Why Nami? Why didn't you tell me? Why couldn't you tell me about our daughter? Did I mean so little to you that you couldn't even tell me about her in a letter? Or did you keep quiet about it because of me and Zoro? Were you afraid it could destroy our relationship? 

"I would have been there for you... for both of you... then our... our... daughter wouldn't have had to see your dead body..." Sanji sobbed at the last words and buried his fingers in the ground below him, ripping the grass from the ground and throwing it into the air. He didn't care if anyone saw or heard him, he just had to let his anger out.

"Fuck, Fuck, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!" Sanji yelled and pounded the floor with his right fist again and again until it was all red.  
He was angry with Nami because she hadn't told him anything, because of her he had missed the first years with his daughter, which everyone described as the most wonderful time, angry because she hadn't given him the opportunity to be there for Sessa when she needed him after her mother's death. He would have loved to see her first steps, her first smile, her first tooth, even the sleepless nights and the childhood illnesses and visits to the doctor, but she preferred to go through it all alone, for whatever reason.

She knew how much he had always wanted children, but just when he was ready to start a family and was financially able to provide for them, he realized that he had fallen in love with Zoro and had put his family plans on hold.  
Until two years ago when he brought up the issue again with Zoro, who refused to adopt a child because he didn't want to have children. As a result they had had a violent argument and Zoro had moved out. What followed was the hardest time of his life, which he had mostly drowned in work and a lot of alcohol because he couldn't bear the painful thoughts of Zoro, and had sought comfort, which he finally found with Nami. Together they had drunk one glass of straw rum after another, which Nami had brought back from her last holiday in Austria, while he had cried out to her and got all the grief off his chest before. 

After that it had become strange between them and although Sanji had tried to rebuild a friendly relationship with her and they had agreed to forget what had happened between them, it had never been the same between them again. At some point he and Zoro had gotten closer again because both realized how much they missed each other and Sanji decided to bury the subject of children for Zoro's sake.   
Nami had been happy for him when he and Zoro told her about their reunion over dinner and 8 weeks later she had moved away unexpectedly and had only sent them a text message saying goodbye to them and had not responded to their calls or messages since then. She even had changed all her numbers and all attempts by Zoro and Sanji to find her had failed.

All these years he had been wondering why she had broken off contact and blamed himself for being so insensitive and drunk and sleeping with her. He had never forgiven himself this moment of weakness and had blamed himself severely, which had haunted him even in his dreams.

Zoro had told him over and over again before they became a couple that he would regret the decision one day, that sooner or later he would long for a woman and eventually get tired of a sourpuss like him, but Sanji had assured him again and again that this would never be the case and that he would be faithful to him for the rest of his life. Zoro had believed him, wanted to believe him so badly because he loved him, and had finally given into the relationship. Sanji was heartbroken at the thought of how much it would hurt Zoro to see Sessa, for she would forever remind him of what he and Nami had done.  
Sanji leaned his forehead on the grass.

What should I do? What am I to do? I don't want to lose him... But I can't abandon my daughter either. She needs me now.

To be continued


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello and welcome again to a new chapter. :)
> 
> I´m glad I could finally finish this chapter because it was pretty hard for me to write it. I hope you like it.  
> Thank you so much for the kudos and I hope that you stay tuned for the next chapter.  
> See you in two weeks!

For days he could neither sleep nor eat properly and was absent and unfocused, which Zeff of course did not miss.

"This can't go on like this , you're gonna ruin my whole business! If you can't work, then stay home," he finally snapped at him and pulled out his artificial leg to give Sanji a blow to the back of his head. The latter didn't even notice the kick, at least he didn't yell at him, he didn't even avoid the kick or parry it, but kept staring at the pan in his hand.

"I can't..." Sanji said, waving the pan in his hand, lost in thought.

"And why not? Is it because of Greenhead?"

"Also..."

"Then talk to him, before I have to close my restaurant because of you! When did you turn into a coward who runs away from his problems?"

"And what shall I tell him? That I would like to take my daughter, who I fathered with our best friend? Then he'll be gone immediately!"

"And that's why you'd rather sit it out? And what about the little girl? Look, kid, I understand that you're in a bit of a quandary, but... you gotta make a decision, no matter what the consequences are. Remember, it's not just you two, it's her too. A relationship always has ups and downs, the most important thing is how you deal with them. So you can either do nothing and wait until the greenhead voluntarily leaves because he realizes that you don't have the balls to decide, or you can show him that you are a man and take up the challenge. And either he stands by you and learns to deal with the fact that there are now three of you or he throws everything away and better disappear, because the little girl will feel the tension between you two. And this is not a good atmosphere for a child. It is never good to suppress problems and push them in front of you, trust me I speak from experience. I almost lost my wife once because I was such a fool to push the problems between us away and ignore her warnings.  
It took me quite some time to realize that I was responsible for our break up and it took me even longer to convince her that I was ready to tackle our problems. I didn't give up and fought until she was ready to give me another chance. So if you don't want to lose him, then fight for him, damn it! Find a way to make this work. I know it won't be easy, but what's easy in life? Challenges are not for cowards, if you want something in life, you have to take it! Fight for it! And if he feels as much for you as you feel for him, then he will have to deal with the situation, even if only for you. I would never have imagined myself taking in a 14-year-old and you were a pretty cheeky and difficult kid, but hey, I did it. And I think you turned out pretty well, even though I couldn't get all the bad habits out of you. So, go on, get out of here and don't come back until you've talked to him!"

Zeff finished his speech with a kick in the butt that made Sanji drive around angry, but before he could say anything, the old man had already pushed him out of the kitchen door and slammed it shut in his face.  
Cursing and gnashing his teeth, Sanji turned his back to the door and stared at the bag with his clothes that was standing on a bench in front of his locker. He was still angry at the old man, because he was right. Keeping the matter dead quiet didn't help, he had to talk to Zoro, no matter how much he feared the conversation. Because he had to know if he would stand by him and help him raise Sessa or not.  
Within five minutes he had changed his clothes and hurried to his car, which he had parked in the staff parking lot behind the restaurant. A glance at his watch told him that Zoro was probably in the middle of a class at the gym where he seemed tob e living lately. No wonder, since the gym was one of the few in town that offered round-the-clock classes and personal fitness trainers, one hotter than the other, so the gym had a lot of female customers. They even lured the staff with special bonuses for overtime, so that the employees could give as many classes as possible in order to put even more money into the already full walletts.

Zoro in particular was in great demand because of his reputation as a multiple, runner-up world champion in swordplay and his self-defence courses were therefore always full. And Zoro, who was always available for paid extra training, used every opportunity to train and was even allowed to choose his students, choosing those he considered strong enough to help him become stronger, so that he could beat the reigning world champion Mihawk Dulacre and finally win the title before he retired.  
Sanji looked up at the large, glass building that towered in front of him like an iceberg, his heart beating excitedly in his chest. Eyes closed and through, he said to himself before finally entering the building and asking at the reception where he could find Mr. Roronoa's self-defense course.

Relieved, he stood in the elevator, which was also glazed, happy not to have to walk up the four floors, even if that would have meant that he had a little more time to think about what to say to Zoro.  
As expected, the swordsman was in the middle of a training session and was just showing impressively how to not only keep his opponent in check, but to recognize his opponent's weaknesses and use them to his advantage.  
Sanji was impressed with the suppleness and at the same time power with which Zoro moved, moving almost effortlessly through the field of his opponents, who attacked him from all sides to rile him up.  
At the very beginning, when they´ve just become a couple, he had watched the green-haired man occasionally during training, but nowadays he hardly had time for it, which was better, because watching his partner train was... hot. With a circling movement of his arms, he stripped off the top of his combat suit until it dangled from his hips, exposing his muscular, sweaty upper body.

Sanji suddenly began to doubt if it was really such a good idea to come here and thought about leaving before Zoro saw him, but it was already too late. The green-haired man had already seen him and seemed anything but happy about his visit. Nevertheless, he didn't let his presence disturb him and ordered his students to line up and ended the lesson with a deep bow before he went outside and pulled him rudely by the arm. When they finally reached the staff changing rooms, Zoro let go of him.

"That's a nice way to greet me in public," Sanji couldn't resist the remark but Zoro ignored his ironic comment and folded his arms dismissively in front of his chest to show him how little desire he had for a conversation with him.

"As you see, I have to work, so make it short."

"I'd love to talk to you about this at home, but unfortunately you haven't been around much lately."

"Is that why you came to play the neglected wife?"

"No way, or I'd make a scene in front of your colleagues that you'll never forget!"

Sanji massaged his tired eyes with the fingers of his right hand. Damn, that wasn't the plan. He hadn't come to argue, but to talk.

"We have to talk."

"The famous last sentence of every relationship..."

"Just hear me out!"

"What for? I know what you want. You saw her, fell in love with her right away and want to adopt her. Is it true or not?"

"That's what I want to talk to you about, but you're blocking any conversation!"

"Because you already know my opinion on the subject! We had this conversation two years ago..."

"But things are very different this time. I have a child now Zoro. I have a responsibility for her. What do you want me to do? Leave her in an orphanage? You know what it's like growing up in one..."

"Don't you dare give me the pity tour! First you sleep with Nami and didn't even tell me about it. Then you expect me not only to swallow this lie, but to raise your child as well?" he shouted, his eyes almost popping out.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about it at the time, but... We were both drunk and it... happened."

Sanji saw the small vein on Zoro's forehead begin to pulse, about to explode. Furiously Zoro tore his arms apart and waved his right index finger in front of Sanji's nose, clenching the other hand into a fist.

"Stop telling me that Nami meant nothing to you! Of course she did! She was our friend. Our best friend! So don't tell me it meant nothing. You're not the type to sleep with someone because you're horny,' Zoro said.

Sanji pulled his lower lip inwards and chewed on it with his teeth. Zoro was right, he couldn't sleep with someone unless he had feelings for this person, but what he felt for Nami and what he felt for Zoro were two completely different things. But none of that mattered, because it didn't change the fact that he slept with her and didn't tell Zoro about it, which made things even worse. If there was one thing Zoro hated, it was not telling him anything. But how could he have told him without risking losing him again right away? And even if he had forgiven him... Zoro would probably look at him for the rest of his life with that painful look he was giving him right now.

"You see, this is exactly why I didn't want to tell you. To not hurt you."

"But you did. And now you expect me to help you make up for your mistake?"

Sanji swallowed, afraid to say the next words but he wanted to make it clear that Zoro had a choice, that he didn't expect him to forgive him so easily.

"No, I do not. It's entirely up to you, what you decide."

"What kind of decision is that? You're putting the gun to my head. Either I take you and the girl or it's over."

"Then you understand how I feel," Sanji said and swallowed the lump that was squeezing down his windpipe. He had the feeling of having his heart ripped out when he saw the anger and disappointment in Zoro's eyes and expected him to punch him in the face, but instead Zoro pushed himself rudely past him and left the changing room before he did anything else he regretted and just left Sanji standing there.

After the devastating conversation with Zoro, Sanji didn't go home immediately, but drove around town in his car for a while, drank a glass of wine in his favourite pinacotheca and finally drove home. It rained cats and dogs the whole way back, which made his mood even worse. He was dreading going home, returning to his empty bed, surrounded by Zoro's smell and his clothes. He hadn't said it, but he had seen it in his eyes. No matter what he had said, it wouldn't have changed anything. Zoro had obviously made up his mind. Against Sessa. And therefore against him as well.

His anger towards Nami and him seemed so big that he couldn't forgive him. At least for now. Maybe one day he could, Sanji hoped he would, but... what if he couldn't?  
What if this was the final end? Almost creeping, the car rolled up the small driveway to the garage and stopped in front of the big gate. Sanji leaned his upper body forward to pull the key out of the ignition, but instead of coming up, he leaned his upper body over the steering wheel and clasped it with his arms. All of a sudden he felt terribly exhausted, so exhausted that he could fall asleep immediately. But then the next morning everything would hurt for sure and he was not allowed to take another day off, after he was allowed to leave a few hours earlier today.

Overtired, Sanji shuffled up the path to the house and just let the door close behind him without locking it. At the moment he didn't care about anything, he just wanted to go to bed and get this horrible day behind him. But before he went to bed, he shuffled into the kitchen and took a bottle of Zoro's favourite whisky with him, which he wanted to drink upstairs to fall asleep.

A few hours later.

"911, what is your emergency?"

"I think there's someone in my house."

"Okay, just stay calm and tell me exactly what happened."

The voice on the other end was slurring as if he was drunk, but seemed calm and said that he had woken up because he heard strange noises coming from the ground floor.

"Okay, where are you now?"

"In the bedroom upstairs."

"What is the name and address?"

The voice also told her that and asked when the police would arrive.

"We will try to send help as soon as possible. Please stay where you are until the police arrive."

"No need, I can do it myself. Just collect him," mumbled the voice and hung up.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone!
> 
> I know it´s been an eternity since the last chapter, I really had a hard time and couldn´t write anything, so I´m really happy that I can finally present you the new chapter and continue with the story. As a little reward for your patience, you get a longer chapter this time and I´m already working on chapter 7, so I can upload it soon an you won´t have to wait too long. I´m sorry that Sanji´s fight isn´t funny, I tried several scenarios, but I didn´t like any of my options, so it turned out more serious. I´m very sorry! :(  
> A huge thank you to VisitorNo18 and to the anonymous guest for your kind comments and recommendation, I´m always happy for any feedback I get! <3
> 
> I hope you enjoy the new chapter and please stay safe and take care of you guys! 
> 
> See you soon!

This is a shitty idea, a really shitty... What am I doing here? Sanji asked himself as he tiptoed down the stairs. When he had told the lovely female telephone operator that he would take care of the burglar and that she should just send a police patrol to pick him up, the plan had sounded good, but the more time he had to think about it, the stupider the idea seemed to him.

On the other hand... the mere thought of some stranger rummagging through his and Zoro's things turned his stomach and anger triumphed over reason.

Presumably the intruder had already found the safe where he always kept some money, for purchases or spontaneous shoppings.  
Sanji cursed and his heart beat faster and faster as he approached the end of the stairs.

The basement was pitch-black and there was a disturbing, treacherous silence, interrupted only by the occasional dull rumble that seemed to come from his study and put him on alert. Tense, Sanji clasped the banister and took several deep breaths, hoping to sober up. Angered, he remembered that he had forgotten to take something with him in order to defend himself. The only weapon he possessed were the black and yellow checked cork slippers he wore on his feet. Great.

His body twitched and his eyes flew towards the hallway, which lay dark and threatening. Was he wrong or had he just heard footsteps? Quick as a flash he crouched down and listened into the darkness. He was right, there were definitely footsteps approaching. Every muscle in his body tensed up, ready to strike. He only had this one try and he didn't even know if the burglar had a weapon with him. 

Although he didn't train as much and as regularly as Zoro, he wasn't inexperienced in close combat and was quite capable of defending himself against the intruder. If only he wasn't so drunk.

Sanji jumped up from the squatting position like a jack-in-the-box behind the stairs and threw himself over the banister with his upper body first to jump on the stranger. But he made a serious mistake: he had neither considered the distance between him and the burglar nor had he determined the exact position beforehand, so he jumped up too soon and landed face down on the hard wooden floor.

Blood shot into his nose and a stabbing pain ran through the bridge of his nose, driving tears into his eyes. Damn, that was not the plan! Angry, he blinked away the tears and reached out his hand to point his finger at the dark shadow he thought he recognized in the darkness.

"Youuuuuu!!!!" he shouted in his face, but his words somehow went down as he held his nose with his other hand to prevent more blood from running out.  
The burglar had recovered from his initial shock and tried to escape when Sanji suddenly wrapped his legs around his hips and squeezed them.

Like cannonballs, the intruder's fists hit Sanji's thighs, but he refused to let go. Sanji felt the intruder trying to pull something out of his belt and bit his lower lip as he felt something drilling into his right thigh. It felt cold, like metal and Sanji became horrified as he realized that this bastard had actually attacked him with a knife. Sanji sucked in the air sharply and suppressed the cry of pain on his tongue, tensing his abdominal muscles to pull his upper body up. His head was roaring and his nose still hurt like hell, but that was nothing compared to the pain that went through every single muscle in his leg as he pulled himself up by his legs. There was no way he would use his hands to fight, they were just too important to him, so he tensed his neck and rammed his head against that of his opponent, who fortunately was the same size as him.  
The burglar cursed and staggered, befuddled by the blow to the head. Sanji, however, took advantage of his opponent's momentary dizziness to let himself fall back with his upper body and performed a handstand before he finally landed on his own legs again, albeit a bit wobbly as the knife was still in his thigh.

Unfortunately there was no time to catch his breath, because the burglar was already rushing towards him with heavy steps and wanted to attack him, at least Sanji could hear how he came closer, panting and he tore up his left, not injured leg to give his opponent a well-aimed kick in the side. But the kick missed its target and Sanji lost his balance through the swing and fell lengthwise onto his back. 

"You damn bastard..." Sanji heard him growl and could feel his breath on his skin as he bent down to grab him. Quick as a flash Sanji pulled his left leg up and pressed it onto his opponent's stomach, grabbed him by the arm and collar and threw him to the ground.

The knife in Sanji's leg hurt like hell and the blood had already drenched his right trouser leg but he had to keep fighting if he didn't want to be killed by this bastard. His opponent jumped up, Sanji could hear his cursing and prepared himself for another attack when suddenly the loud sound of a police siren sounded and Sanji let his head fall back onto the wooden floor in relief before he lost consciousness.

Sanji was lucky that the ambulance arrived less than 10 minutes after the police arrived. At the hospital it turned out that no vital arteries or other blood vessels had been injured by the stabbing, which was a relief for Sanji, Luffy and the others. However, Sanji had to stay in the hospital for at least two days before the doctors finally released him. But at least he could not complain of boredom, as he was visited every day by one of his friends who brought him food from the Baratié and entertained him. Luffy in particular tried hard to make Sanji laugh as much as possible, because in all that time Zoro didn't even show up, although each of his friends had left at least one message on his mailbox. But he just didn't answer and nobody knew where he had been staying since the fight with Sanji. He hadn't shown up at the gym for two days either. Even a friend and colleague of Zoro's, who had told Usopp that Zoro had called in sick, didn't know where he was.

"Weeds don't grow weed, he's probably hanging out with some buddy, getting drunk all day and complaining about me," Sanji surmised as he sat on Laws and Luffy's couch after his release, surrounded by his friends who wanted to celebrate his recovery.

Sanji didn't miss Vivi´s worried looks. He couldn't fool her, she looked through him and he was annoyed that she had to worry about him and this idiot. But what annoyed him the most was that he was worried about Zoro.

He should rather worry about himself. The burglar apparently hadn't stolen anything, which was strange enough, but he had managed to escape arrest at the last second and that concerned him, especially as he was planning to adopt and take Sessa. Maybe he should sell the house and move away with her...

No, he couldn't do that. He just couldn't bring himself to do it, there were too many memories in this house. Memories of good times and bad times. The good times outweighed the bad, so he had a hard time letting go of them, even though it hurt right now. 

"Seriously Luffy? A hamburger? You know very well I don't like bread," Law yelled and tore Sanji from his thoughts of Zoro. Luffy had bought food for everyone from the fast food restaurant around the corner, which Vivi was handing out now.

"Why don't you take the slices of bread away and just eat the meat?"

"You mean that greasy, charred thing? I'd rather eat coal briquettes," Law said, turning the dark piece of meat back and forth with his fork in disgust.

"Okay, I'll make you a sandwich then" Luffy offered conciliatory, knowing that his friend could be obnoxious when he was hungry. Besides, sandwiches were one of the few things he could do. He was not even able to fry a fried egg without completely charring it.

Law hit his head with his flat hand in frustration and shook it. Luffy was a hopeless case. But he was too tired from the overtime in the hospital to continue protesting, so he let it go and concentrated on talking to the others while he had the third cup of coffee from his thermos to keep himself awake. Stealthily he watched Sanji, who looked just as tired as him, not noticing at first the acrid smell that soon spread all over the room. 

It wasn't until Luffy jumped up and down excitedly and screamed loudly for fire, that he was aware of the smoke and jumped over the couch with a pike jump and hurried into the kitchen. He only missed Usopp's head by a hair's breadth who was typing in his cell phone.

"Damn Luffy, what have you done now?!" he shouted in horror, unplugged the toaster and opened the kitchen window wide to let the smoke out. Luffy frowned in confusion and didn´t understand why his boyfriend was making such a big fuss out of it.

"I told you so! A sandwich! I wanted to toast it for you because you didn't have anything warm today!"

"You put the topping on AFTER you take the bread out of the toaster, idiot!" 

Law poked around frustratedly with a knife, trying to scrape the charred bread out of it, but unfortunately it was stuck inside the toaster by the melted cheese. He puffed and ordered Luffy to go into the living room, where at least he couldn't do any more mischief.

Five minutes later, he sat down on the couch next to Luffy, who looked at him with his big brown eyes and gave him a disarming charm, trying to make Law to forgive him.

"Don't look so cute, I'm mad at you," Law said, hoping the black-haired man would not notice that his anger was already beginning to subside. He just could never stay angry with him long enough.

Sanji tried not to look at them, as the sight of happy couples hurt, so he turned his attention to his friend Usopp, the only current single of all his friends, who was strangely quiet today and preferred to play with his mobile phone rather than join the conversation. Only once in a while, he would take a bite of his hamburger before his hand returned to his phone as if it could run away from him.

"Who are you texting with anyway?" he asked curiously and tried to get a look at Usopp's cell phone but Usopp pulled it away before Sanji could even look at the display.

"A woman," he replied as his cheeks turned red. Sanji grinned meaningfully. He was happy for his friend who had obviously taken his advice to heart t go out and meet real people. After all, he couldn't sit in his room all day writing and illustrating children's books, even if that was his job.

"How long have you known each other?" he wanted to know and turned to his friend to get a better look at him. The others, who had just had a lively conversation, also looked at Usopp curiously, which was unpleasant for both Usopp and Sanji, who felt bad, because he didn't know if Usopp was ready to talk about them yet.

"You met someone Usopp? That's great!" Vivi cried out and clapped her hands enthusiastically.

"Well, getting to know might not be the right word. We've only been texting to each other so far. I got to know her through a dating app."

"Why not? Don't you want to get to know her in person? I mean, I don't want you to get disappointed again."

Lysop turned even redder now, if that was even possible. He knew only too well what she was alluding to, after all it wasn't that long ago that he had arranged to meet an alleged woman who had turned out to be not only a guy but also a fan of his books, from which he always read to his three-year-old son before going to bed. The situation had been more than embarrassing for Usopp, yet he had agreed to give him an autograph for his son and had even promised to come to his son's fourth birthday party before they both went separate ways. Since then Usopp had become more careful and did not want to meet anyone again until he was one hundred percent sure. 

"We have only recently started writing. "Also... I don't want to do anything wrong. "Because... she is... very special." Lysop confessed and looked tenderly at his display, as if she were standing right in front of him.

Sanji placed his hand on Usopp´s back and gave him a sincere smile.

"I am happy for you. But if it's something serious, you'll introduce us, won't you?" 

Usopp nodded and looked up from his cell phone as the apartment doorbell rang.

As Luffy made no attempt to open the door, Law stood up reluctantly to find out who it was. Sanji froze and his heart beat up to his neck as he recognized Zoro's voice.  
He had come after all. Actually, he wanted to be angry with him and ignore him completely, but now that he was suddenly there, he just couldn't sit still and he clumsily stood up as his leg still hurt and walked towards the hall. He stopped in front of the door to the corridor so Zoro couldn't see him and listened to their conversation.

Sanji puffed angrily and crossed his arms in front of his chest, to stop himself from strangling Zoro, when he heard him explain that he just had found out what had happened, because he hadn't noticed that his battery was dead, which he forgot to charge. That was so typical for him. He just could not get used to owning a mobile phone. Constantly he forgot to charge this stupid thing and to took it with him before he left the house if he didn't remind him.

His desire for a cigarette was greater than ever, but he wasn't allowed to smoke at Law's and left the pack in his breast pocket even though it was hard to resist.

"Where have you been anyway? We looked for you everywhere" Law said and Sanji's ears grew longer and longer. 

"I'm staying over at Bartolomeo's till I find my own place.

"You know that guy's after you, right?"

"Yeah, but I don't want him, keep cool, ok? But, uh... ...don't tell the cook about this, okay?  
I'm not in the mood for any jealousy dramas. Or... is he with you?" Zoro suddenly asked, as if this possibility had only just occurred to him.

"No, he's not. He'll probably be resting at home, this cut the burglar gave him was quite deep, but luckily it didn't hurt any vital blood vessels", Law lied, who was too tired for a lover´s quarrel after his long shift.

Sanji heard Zoro growling and cursing before he asked Law if everything else was okay and if anything had been stolen. Law, who was very familiar with Sanji's medical file, told him that apart from the cut, he had hurt his nose but it wasn't broken and that apparently nothing had been stolen, probably because Sanji had disturbed the burglar before he could steal anything. Zoro seemed relieved and thanked Law for the information and left before Law could tell him that the burglar had escaped arrest and was on the run ever since.

When the door finally fell into the lock, Sanji couldn't stand it any longer and ran past his friends to the balcony where he made himself comfortable on a wicker chair to smoke. No one dared to go outside after Sanji closed the balcony door noisily behind him, a sure sign that he was not only upset but also wanted to be left alone. But after they watched Sanji light his fourth cigarette Vivi decided to join him on the balcony.

"Is everything all right with you? You've been sitting out here a long time and the others are starting to worry about you."

"What do you mean? "The fact that my best friend is dead and left me a daughter? Or the fact that my boyfriend left me after seven years and now lives with a guy who's been in love with him since high school? Or are you talking about that fucking burglar who tried to stab me for 2000 lousy bucks I had in my safe? I'm sorry Vivi, but you'll have to be a little more specific..." Sanji said and his voice dripped with sarcasm.

Vivi couldn't escape the sharp undertone in his voice and she was already about to leave the balcony when Sanji suddenly jumped up and grabbed her arm gently.

"Vivi wait, I'm sorry. It was wrong of me to take my anger out on you. It's just..."

Sanji was ashamed of his behavior and couldn't even look his friend in the eye.

"...not easy for you right now? I know," she finished his sentence, took Sanji's hand in hers and stroked the back of his hand tenderly. 

"It's just been too much lately. "If you want to... you can stay with me while Kohza's away. Get your mind off things. Get our minds off."

Sanji looked up. With all his grief, he'd forgotten that Vivi was just as miserable now that Kohza was on the road in some war zone again and she didn't know where he was, and his guilt was even greater. He would love to take her offer, but he felt he'd give up and lose if he let himself be driven out of his house by a burglary, so he decided to decline her offer. 

After he had cooked a delicious dinner for himself and his friends, he went home and tried to distract himself by doing some housework, as far as his leg would allow him to do so. It was amazing how much dirty laundry this idiot produced, Sanji noticed in annoyance as he sorted the laundry and was secretly happy not to have to worry about it, at least for now.

Certainly this Bartolomeo guy was already annoyed about the sloppiness of his new roommate, he thought gloatingly and angrily stuffed a few pieces of laundry into the washing machine. He couldn't sleep anyway, so he might as well turn on a machine with laundry. Both should suffocate in their mud. He would see what he got out of taking Zoro in. But who knows, maybe this Bartolomeo was just as sloppy and the two were already walking around in their dirty clothes. Or maybe they didn't wear anything at all anymore until one of them made his way through and finally did the laundry. Did Zoro actually mention to Law that he had been at home to get some things since their fight? Sanji couldn't remember.  
Hastily he packed a few things for Zoro and got into his car.

He still remembered that he had to pick up Zoro once because both of them were so drunk that they could hardly walk straight ahead. At that time they had celebrated Bartolomeo's passing the entrance examination to the technical faculty and then puked all over Sanji's car. He would have loved to drop them both off at the next street corner, but somehow he couldn't bring himself to drive Bartolomeo home after all. 

Luckily, after all this time, he still seemed to live at the same address, because there was still the same name on the doorbell.

Sanji rang the bell and waited a while without anyone opening it. Was there nobody at home? Sanji tried to look through the blinds and at least he could see a narrow beam of light, so someone had to be there. One look at the clock told him that it was 9 p.m.  
Maybe he was already asleep. Maybe he should just leave the bag outside the door. Or knock again? But before he could make a decision, the door suddenly opened and a green haired head popped up.

"What are you doing here?" Bartolomeo asked in amazement, but received no answer, because Sanji was too busy staring at him. Or at the piece of clothing he was wearing. The ONLY item of clothing he was wearing. It was a pair of dark green boxer shorts, which Sanji felt all too familiar with.

"Turn around," Sanji just said and reaped a confused frown from Bartolomeo.

"What?"

"I said turn... around..." Sanji now ordered in an ice-cold voice and grabbed the green-haired man's arm as he still stared at him without understanding. Bartolomeo tried to free himself from the iron grip and refused to turn around, so Sanji strengthened the grip and twirled him around himself. His eyes almost fell out of his eye sockets as he read the black writing that ran across the fabric and that covered the entire back of the boxer shorts. It had been meant as a fun gift, for Zoro's birthday. They hadn't been together for long and Sanji had no idea what to give Zoro, so he thought about giving him these boxer shorts with Sanji's name on the back. As expected it hadn't failed to have the desired effect and Zoro had not only become fierce but also red like a tomato and the birthday ended in a fight and in the hottest sex they ever had. Even days later Sanji still couldn't sit properly, but it had been worth it for him. And even though he was very annoyed about the present in the beginning, Sanji caught him now and then putting it on in secret. Of course, the mosshead always claimed that it was just an accident, that he hadn't paid attention to it, but he couldn't fool Sanji.

It had been his first gift to Zoro as a friend, and to see how another man, and Bartolomeo of all people, was wearing it made Sanji´s temper boil over. Something in his head suddenly clicked and before Bartolomeo knew what was going on, Sanji tried to pull his boxer shorts over his hips.

"What... what are you doing?" he asked in horror and tried to pull the boxer shorts up again.  
A wild scuffle ensued in which both of them finally went down. Like a madman, Bartolomeo screamed for help and tried to free himself or at least pull the boxer shorts back up over his hips, but Sanji sat on Bartolomeo's legs, tugging at the piece of cloth, avoiding the green-haired man's wildly wriggling legs when he suddenly heard a deep voice behind him.

"What the hell is going on here?"


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again,
> 
> as promised I hurried to finish the chapter. I hope like it.  
> Thank you everyone for all the kudos, I was very happy, that you liked this chapter. <3  
> See you in two weeks.

Slowly, Sanji turned around and looked up at the tall, muscled man who stared at him angrily with big, light-grey eyes. The pale light that illuminated the corridor to the apartments turned the gray, sleep-ravaged hair in a brilliant white that almost blinded him. Great, just what he needed. Annoying neighbors who thought they could meddle in other people's business. 

"Can't you see I'm busy? Get lost!" Sanji growled at the stranger and turned his attention on Bartolomeo again, who was supporting his upper body on his forearms. At the sight of the stranger, his voice almost drowned in joy.

"Smoker! You have to help me!"

The stranger called Smoker did not hesitate and dragged Sanji down by his collar demanding an explanation. Sanji didn't know what the whole thing was about, but he told him what happened in case he called the police. Smoker raised his eyebrows as he was listening to the story, but didn't let on whether he bought it or not. After Sanji had told everything, Smoker turned to Bartolomeo to hear his version of the events.

Bartolomeo admitted that he had put on Zoro's shorts but that it was an accident because they had recently started living together and kept their underwear in the same drawer and that's why the mix-up had happened.

The longer Sanji listened to Bartolomeo's story, the more rage piled up inside him until he finally discharged, grabbed Bartolomeo by the collar and shook him almost senseless.

"To make it clear, Zoro's only staying with you temporarily and until then, stay away from him and his clothes!"

Smoker, who had remained calm until now, was starting to loose his patience with the two and so his words turned out to be a little harsher and louder than he actually intended.

"I don't care who lives with whom or what he wears! The only thing I care about is whether or not you want to report him for sexual assault."

Sanji almost choked on his own saliva and his cheeks burned when he barked at Smoker.

"Sexual assault"? With him? Never! Also... who do you think you are? A fucking cop?"

Smoker's eyes narrowed and his voice vibrated menacingly as his gaze returned to Sanji.

"Not only do I believe that, I'm a fucking cop. And if you don't stop stirring up trouble here, I'm taking you down to the station, do you understand? So how about it, Bartolomeo? You want to report him or not?"

The green-haired man watched Sanji for what felt like an eternity before he finally sighed audibly and shook his head.

"No, I won't. But let's be clear: I'm only doing this for Zoro's sake."

"Stay away from him, ok?!" Sanji threatened him sticking his finger under Bartolomeo's nose.

"Okay, that's it, get out of here before I change my mind," Smoker ended the argument before it could escalate again, pushing Sanji roughly toward the stairs as the door next to Bartolomeo's apartment opened and a woman with long pink hair, covered with a thin sheet, opened the door.

"Hina is bored," she said reproachfully, looking at Smoker with her almond brown eyes. Smoker rolled his eyes.

"Tell Hina to go in, Smoker's coming... ...I mean... ...go on back inside. I'll be right there. Good Lord, you drive me crazy with your third person talk.“ 

The beautiful woman clicked disparagingly with her tongue, but disappeared in Smoker's apartment. As the door closed noisily, Smoker turned back to Sanji.

"Well? Are you going to clear the field voluntarily or not," Smoker asked, piercing him with his insistent gaze that would not tolerate any contradiction. Sanji had no intention of staying here any longer anyway, so he pressed Zoro's bag into Bartolomeo´s hand, warned him never to touch any of his things again, and left.

When he reached the landing he lit a cigarette. The nicotine that penetrated his receptors quickly unfolded its effect and he calmed down. 

The next days passed by without Vivi or the others hearing anything from Zoro or Sanji. But this was not unusual, they had all experienced a separation of the two of them and therefore knew that they liked to get into work until they fell into bed tired at some point. Vivi, however, did not want to accept this and invited everyone except Zoro and Sanji to an intervention to discuss with the others how they could help them.

"Maybe we should lock them up," Usopp thought aloud and Luffy agreed euphorically.

"Yes, let's lock them back up in the closet like we did two years ago," he shouted, and caught a disapproving look from Law.

"Our storeroom hasn't recovered from Sanji's kick that took it off the hinges."

"Law is right, we have to do things differently. More subtle, if we don't want them to know what we're up to," Vivi agreed.

"And how are we going to do that?" Usopp asked curiously, trying to concentrate on the conversation as well as on his mobile phone, which was receiving messages every two minutes.

"We have to make sure that they don't avoid each other any more and the best way to do that is to create situations where they meet each other IN RELEASE. At the very least, it has to seem that way to them, they must not notice that these encounters are not coincidental. So we need to make a plan and figure out how to get them in the same place and make them talk."

"I don't know Vivi, with their temperament, this could backfire very quickly" Chopper reminded her.

"That's why we always have to stay close by to intervene if necessary. But it's important that they get a little push in the right direction. They would never admit it, but they need each other, they are just too stubborn to make the first step. Above all, Zoro has to move out of Bartolomeo´s place before another disaster strikes."

Vivi had heard about the incident through Sanji when she called him two days ago to ask how he was doing and she hadn't forgotten how threatening his voice sounded while he was telling her what had happened.

"You don't have to worry about that any more, Zoro is staying with me now," Usopp said, chewing on a piece of bread pudding. He immediately had the attention of the whole group.

"Why didn't you tell me about this?" Vivi yelled at him, whereupon he collapsed in shock and almost choked himself.

"I promised Zoro not to tell anyone," he confessed sheepishly and blushed when he realized that he had just broken the promise he had made. He urged everyone present not to mention to Zoro that they knew he lived with him, especially not Sanji.

"How... is he doing?" Vivi asked, who was just glad that he had realized that it was a bad idea to move in with the man who was secretly in love with him.

"Well, you know Zoro. He acts tough, but..." 

Usopp didn't finish the sentence, there was no need to, because everybody knew that he felt just as miserable as Sanji. How bad, however, only he knew, but he preferred to keep that to himself. Anyway, Zoro wouldn't like it if the others found out that he had gotten hopelessly drunk the first night at his place and talked about Sanji the rest of the evening until he had finally tilted to the side and landed with his head on Usopp's lap. His eyes had been glassy and reddened, yet there was so much love and tenderness in his words as he spoke to Usopp.

"Crawl my head, Sanji," he had mumbled before his eyes finally closed and he had fallen asleep. The whole thing had been so embarrassing for Usopp that the next day he had locked away all the alcoholic drinks and hadn't said a word to Zoro about the evening, even though Zoro had been angry and wanted to know why he had locked away all the alcohol. 

Lysop looked up from his cell phone when Vivi asked him why Zoro had suddenly moved in with him. He explained to her that Zoro and Bartolomeo had probably had a fight after Bartolomeo told him that his "crazy ex" had tried to rip his shorts off, whereupon Zoro had forbidden him to call Sanji crazy because he was the only one who was allowed to do that and wanted to know why he had put on his underwear in the first place.

"I don't understand why Zoro moved in with Bartolomeo in the first place. He knows how quickly Sanji gets jealous, especially when it comes to Bartolomeo," Vivi said and sipped at her coffee cup, which she held with both hands.

"Knowing Zoro, I'm sure he thought Bartolome´s was the last place Sanji would show up. Well, obviously he was wrong. That's why he doesn't want anyone to know where he is, 

especially Sanji..."

The coffee spilled over when Vivi suddenly put the cup on the table, her eyes sparkling in determination. Usopp knew from experience that she had made a decision and he was pretty sure that it would involve everyone, whether they wanted to or not.

"You know Usopp, the fact that Zoro has moved in with you comes in very handy so you can keep an eye on him and keep me up to date on what he's up to and especially where he is."

"You do realize that I'm working on a new children's book right now, so I don't have much time."

"I thought you were a freelancer? You can use your time freely, can't you? Then you work while Zoro sleeps."

Since Usopp did not answer and also avoided her gaze, she reached over the table and grabbed his hands, which were still holding the mobile phone.

"Please Usopp. You have to help me, I can't do it without you. They can't do it without us. Do it for Zoro and Sanji.

The discomfort in Usopp grew more and more. He was reluctant to interfere in their relationship, but it hurt him to see how much they both suffered from the whole situation.

"And how do you want to help them?"

"Don't worry about that. All you have to do is take care of Zoro. I'll take care of Sanji."

"How long did you say Kohza was gone?"

Vivi let her shoulders droop and squeezed Usopp's hand as if it was her husband's. Usopp tried to give her an encouraging smile. It was beyond his comprehension how she endured these long periods of separation, this constant fear and uncertainty and he admired her bravery, her understanding of her husband's work and above all, her infinite patience with which she was waiting for him to return. Kohza was lucky that his wife was content with occasional holidays together and rare Skype chats, and that despite all the loneliness and longing that occasionally overcame her, she still managed to remain faithful to him and never gave a thought to another man. 

With the exception of Zoro and Sanji, who now seemed to have become her new personal heart project. No one in their group was as passionate about love as Vivi, who devoured love films and books like others devoured food.

She and Nami were instrumental in Sanji and Zoro finally admitting their feelings and coming together after a long time of back and forth.

Slowly Vivi let go of his hands and dropped back onto the big white leather sofa behind her. Her eyes looked sadly at the beige longhair carpet at her feet and her voice sounded melancholic and hopeful at the same time as she spoke.

"Until his next holiday, there are at least 8 months left. But if all goes well, he may stay for a whole month next time. Can you imagine that? A month!!  
I'm already planning what we will do in all that time, spending as much time as possible and... ...and finally work on our baby plans. 

Vivi smiled embarrassed as she lifted her head and looked into the surprised faces of her friends, who had to process the information. But when even Luffy understood what this meant, everyone was clearly happy and hoped their plans would bear fruit.

"Hey Law, let's adopt a child too, then it would have lots of playmates," Luffy suggested enthusiastically, obviously infected by the anticipation and baby fever, but Law just shook his head in horror and stared at Luffy with big eyes.

"No, absolutely not. You remember the dog you took care of? You were completely overwhelmed with it. How do you expect to take of a baby?"

Luffy snouted when he heard his boyfriend´s rude words and crossed his arms in front of his chest.

"Not true at all. Just wait and see, I'll prove it to you. As soon as Sessa is officially living with Sanji and Zoro, I will offer to look after her."

Vivi smiled and admired Luffy's boundless optimism, who obviously had no doubt that the two would get back together again. The separation was not good for either of them. Two days ago, after her phone call with Sanji, when she decided to go and see him in person, she immediately noticed the dark rings under his eyes. Sanji had tried to hide his emotional state by smiling, but it was not enough to distract her from the pale skin, the tousled hair, the baggy pants and the way too big t-shirt he was wearing. 

They were obviously Zoro's, because Sanji never wore such things and the thought of him going to bed in the evening with Zoro's clothes to have him around, almost broke her heart and strengthened her more than ever in her desire to help them. She would do everything in her power to get them back together.

After his meeting at Vivi's, Usopp returned home in order to work before Zoro would come home and stopped when he heard the door unlock and Zoro entering the apartment with heavy footsteps.

Curiously he squinted out of his room door and watched Zoro first undo the shoelaces and then kick the shoes off his feet as they flew across the room. Oh man. A bad-tempered Zoro. Usopp wondered whether he should rather stay in the room until he slept, but then he changed his mind and decided to appease him with Chinese food that he had ordered. On a full stomach he was not quite as unbearable.

After Zoro had taken off his shoes, he lifted up the two six-packs of beer he had brought with him, sat down on the small sofa and slammed his feet on the table.

It seemed as if he was in for another evening of drinking. Usopp sighed and left his room. He´d promised Vivi to look after Zoro.

"Hard day?" he asked and sat down on the couch next to Zoro. The green-haired didn't seem in the mood for small talk, because he just grunted and took another sip from his can, so Usopp decided to leave him alone until he started talking on his own and went over to the fridge to get the food and heat it up in the microwave. Zoro had already reached his second can of beer when something hot landed on his lap.

"What the fuck, Usopp?" he cursed and stuck one of the seat cushions on his lap where he put the plate down.

"You can talk! I thought you'd washed your tongue out with all that beer!" Usopp couldn't resist to say and stuffed the full fork into his mouth.

"Be glad I'm too tired or I'd strangle you with your cheeky tongue," Zoro said between chewing and swallowing. Apparently he hadn't eaten anything all day, because after the first listless bites, his appetite seemed to finally come and he shovelled the food into his mouth. 

"Man, you'd be really screwed up if nobody cared about you," Usopp said casually, regretting his words as soon as he uttered them, because Zoro dropped the plate furiously on the table in front of him and grabbed the next can of beer.

"I got along fine before that idiot. And I'll get along after him too. I don't understand why you all think that's not true! First Brook, then you..."

Usopp interrupted Zoro when he heard the name of their friend and musician, who was touring somewhere on the other side of the world. 

"Brook contacted you? When? Why didn't you tell me? How is he doing?"

"I'm doing it right now. He checked in earlier when I was about to take a shower after my last training session. He's probably fine, but he hardly has any free time and therefore can rarely get in touch. Obviously somebody told him about the cook and me and he tried to persuade me to reunite with the cook. He couldn't stop talking about how we are made for each other and that if we don't make it, he would completely lose faith in finding someone himself and all that shit. You know how he is."

"However" Usopp said grinning, who remembered only too well how Brook gave Zoro and Sanji, a CD on the 6th anniversary with songs he had composed especially for them, each song focusing on a moment in their relationship: from the first kiss to the first separation and their reunion. Since Brook always had on/off relationships, but could never keep a woman permanently, he admired the two of them all the more for their ability to stay together. Certainly he was now depressed about their separation. Probably Luffy had told him about it, at least he knew that the two talked on the phone regularly.

"Seriously, Usopp, don't mess with our business, okay? He has a daughter and that's it."  
Zoro was already sipping beer number three and had placed the other two cans in front of the small table.

"And that's why you don't want to be with him anymore? Because you don't like children?"

"Right. He hid the fact that he and Nami had a thing."

Usopp gently turned his head back and forth, incredulous at what he heard.

"I understand that you're hurt by what they did and that you need time to digest it and come to terms with the fact that he has a child..."

"I don't have to be comfortable with anything. He knew from the beginning I didn't want kids."

"But he can't change the fact that he's a father now. And besides... Sessa needs him, she has no one else. What do you want him to do? Let her grow up in an orphanage? You know Sanji used to live in an orphanage for a long time before he was adopted. He would never forgive himself if his only child grew up in an orphanage. So he has no choice but to make the best of the situation. It's not as if he became a father on purpose..."

"Oh no? So he didn't sleep with Nami?"

"Yes, but not with the intention of impregnating her!"

"You have to expect that when you sleep with a woman!"

"They were both drunk! And Sanji was depressed because of you..."

"And that justifies his behavior?!"

"No, but it makes things understandable. People make mistakes. You're the best example of that right now. You're about to throw away the best thing that ever happened to you. I'd give anything to have someone like Sanji."

"Then take him!"

Usopp's eyes stared stunned at the man in front of him and his lips trembled. He knew that Zoro was talking in pain, he didn't want anyone to notice what was going on inside him, so he hurt others and pushed them away before they could see through him. Sanji had understood this quickly and therefore didn't usually resent his hurtful behaviour, because he knew that it was Zoro's way of dealing with his feelings and expressing them. Usopp looked down at his hands that lay clenched in his lap and trembled, yet he tried to speak to his friend as calmly as possible so as not to make him even more angry.

"He loves you, Zoro. So much so that he was willing to give up children for your sake, even though he always wanted to have them. He never complained or said whether he ever regretted his decision or not. And do you know why?"

Usopp now looked into those sad, dark eyes full of pain and sadness as he continued to speak.

"Because he could imagine a life without children rather than a life without you. Is it really so impossible for you to at least try? For his sake? Or would you rather be angry with him forever? I know you love him. I can see it in your eyes...“

Usopp twitched when Zoro suddenly jumped up. He grabbed the remaining cans, tucked them under his arm and left Usopp alone in the apartment.

Exhausted, Usopp sank back on the couch and clasped his hands above his head. How was he going to exlain this to Vivi?


	8. Chapter 8

Zoro wandered aimlessly around all night, emptying one can of beer after another to dispel the anger and grief, while his thoughts kept drifting back to the fight with Usopp and the words they had thrown at each other, echoed in his ears like a tinnitus.  
He had believed that at least Usopp was on his side, but Usopp, like everyone else, had only reproached him, without being interested in his motives or even trying to understand him.

Zoro had had a lot of time to think, he didn't really do anything else but mull over himself and the cook all day long, no matter if he wanted to or not. He could probably forgive the cook the thing with Nami, after all everybody made mistakes, but raising a child with the cook was a completely different matter. Something that would completely turn their so far so quiet life upside down.

Well, quiet did not quite match their life, he admitted to himself. Their relationship was anything but easy and with a child it would certainly become even more complicated, stressful and above all louder, after all the little one was only two years old. At that age they were so dependent and needed help with everything, she was probably even still wearing diapers, he had no idea. He did not want to find out at all. Children did not like him, he had often enough experienced that they burst into tears if they only saw him or hid anxiously behind their parents if they ran into him. 

And he... he just wasn't suitable for dealing with children and was glad that the topic was not yet current among his friends and that none of them had children. Well, except for Ace and Marco, but he hadn't had much contact with them anyway since they had adopted a little boy and although the cook had certainly toyed with the idea of offering them to look after their boy from time to time, he had never done it because of him.  
Usopp was right, the cook had never hinted if he had ever regretted his decision, but Zoro had never missed the looks he gave mothers with children when he ran into them shopping or in the park or in the restaurant or wherever and he was afraid that the cook might leave him one day because of it. How ironic that he was now the one who had broken up with the cook because of this.

Even though he knew that his decision had been right, he missed him, their little rituals together, even their arguments, but most of all he missed Sanji, his voice, his smell, the smell of tobacco and food that always surrounded him and to fall asleep and wake up next to the blonde. He even missed those annoying, funny-looking eyebrows, which he liked to look at sometimes in secret while the cook slept. It was strange how something so simple could both annoy and fascinate him. ...like everything else that had to do with the blonde. It had always been that way.

They were like two magnets that attracted and repelled each other. 

But not only the cook seemed to attract him magically, also the memories of him had somehow led him into their old quarter, as he realized in surprise, when he suddenly found himself in front of the old, but meanwhile unfortunately closed pub, where he and the cook had once met in a pub fight, in which the cook had only interfered, because he wanted to protect a woman, who had accidentally got between the fronts. Fortunately, they were able to disappear before the cops showed up.

But the spark that started it all started a few weeks later when they met again in a discotheque. At that time, he had come with Luffy and Usopp and Sanji with Nami and Vivi and everyone had gotten along right away, except for him and the cook.

Nami and Vivi thought they sensed some kind of attraction between him and the chef and they left no stone unturned to ensure that they constantly ran into each other in the disco, which increasingly frustrated him and the chef, so they both got drunk unrestrainedly every time they ran into each other again, until the pent-up frustration finally exploded on the dance floor.

It only took a small collision for them to go at each other's throats. To this day, Zoro didn't know how it could come to this, only that their lips were intertwining, and their bodies couldn't get close enough.

At first he had convinced himself that the kiss had been just an accident and had tried to forget it until a few days after the incident the cook suddenly showed up in front of his apartment to tell him that he shouldn't imagine anything about the kiss because he didn't want anything from him.   
Zoro had wanted to provoke him and told him that this kiss would mean something to him after all, otherwise he wouldn't have come to his house to tell him that. Sanji had replied that the kiss wouldn't have been as good as he thought, which spurred Zoro's ambition, who was determined to prove the cook how wrong he was. Without further ado he had pressed the blond against the wall of the building and kissed his lips sore.

Angry, the cook had pushed him away and was gone. But even after the second kiss, Zoro had still convinced himself that he didn't feel anything for the cook until they met again one evening. Zoro had just come from a party and was on his way home when the cook suddenly stopped next to him and told him that he was going in the completely wrong direction and offered to drive him home, which Zoro only accepted because he was too tired and too drunk to walk. When he arrived at the front door, the cook helped him to bed because Zoro could hardly walk anymore before he finally said goodbye. But Zoro didn't want to let him go and had wrapped his arms around Sanji's neck and didn't want to let him go until he kissed him. The cook refused, but when he realized that he wouldn't be released otherwise, he decided to go for it and kissed him first fleetingly and then more intensely but interrupted the kiss when he felt Zoro caressing him tenderly and withdrew in confusion.  
Zoro, however, realized that their kisses meant something to him after all, and when they met again at Nami's birthday party, he kissed the cook again and confessed that he liked kissing him and that he felt something for him, whereupon the cook sent him to the devil.

After that Zoro had sworn to forget the idiot for good and ignored him completely until they met again a month later at Vivi's beach party. The cook left no stone unturned to talk to Zoro alone, which Zoro refused to do until the cook grabbed him angrily and dragged him into the next dressing room where he kissed him and finally confessed that Zoro was not indifferent to him. They almost almost had sex in that dressing room if Zoro hadn't been so excited and had come in the cook's hand as soon as the cook had touched his shaft. The cook, however, had only smiled and intertwined their fingers before they had gone back to the others. It took two more attempts before his excitement about the cook began to subside and he endured longer.

Exhausted and depressed by memories of the cook, Zoro sat down on a park bench and drank the last can of beer before he crouched down on the bench and closed his eyes to fall asleep.

When he opened them hours later, it was already daytime and he was no longer alone, for two pairs of brown eyes were staring at him, one concerned and the other amused.

"Good morning sleepyhead," Luffy cried out loud in his usual good humor, beaming from ear to ear.

"What... are you doing here?" Zoro mumbled overslept and looked at Luffy's adopted brother Ace who had accompanied him.

"We were looking for you. I was about to have a brother's evening with Luffy when Usopp called him and asked if you were with him and that he was worried because you just disappeared after your fight and haven't come back since. So, we decided we'd better go look for you, knowing how good your sense of direction is." 

Now even Ace couldn't help but grin, but it immediately turned into an expression of pain when Zoro punched him on the upper arm with his fist after he had straightened his upper body. Overslept, he rubbed his eyes and accepted in amazement a plastic cup of hot coffee, which they had filled from a thermos flask. Ignoring the heat, Zoro took a few big sips before asking if they had any food with them.

"We would have, if Luffy hadn't eaten it all on the way here," Ace said, glancing reproachfully at his adopted brother, who was not aware of any guilt.

"How is it my fault I only got this measly sandwich from you?" Luffy complained and defensively crossed his arms in front of his chest.

"Are you kidding, that was a two-story, three-inch, triple-sided sandwich, you glutton!"

"Would you two stop screaming, my head is pounding!" 

"It's your own fault for drinking so much. You want to come in for a shower and breakfast before you go to work?"

Zoro nodded and followed them back to the car and got in the back seat behind Ace.

They were on the road for a while when Ace finally broke the silence and asked how Zoro was doing. The green-haired man shrugged his shoulders. What could he possibly say? 

"This can't be easy for you."

"You can say that again."

"Children change everything. Suddenly you are not only responsible for your own life, but also for that of your child. For the rest of your life."

"Well, he should've thought about that before he slept with Nami."

"What's going to happen to you two?"

"How so? He lives happily ever after with his daughter and I live my old life again."

"I can't imagine life as a single parent. Being there for the child around the clock, without a break, without having time for myself alone. I am so happy that I have Marco, so we can support each other and take turns with our son. Without him, I would never have dared to adopt a child, I wish Sanji a lot of strength to manage the double burden alone."

Zoro unbuckled the seat belt and put one hand on the door handle, ready to open the door, even at full speed if Ace refused to stop.

"Ok, you can let me out here, I'll walk the rest of the way."

"Sorry Zoro, I didn't mean it like that. I just worry about you two. Nami's death, Sanji's daughter, your separation... It's all too much to take. For both of you. You're not well, even if you say you are. Something's bothering you, and I'd like to know what it is so I can help you."

Ace looked in the rear-view mirror and tried to squint around his headrest, which Zoro was hiding. He avoided looking at both Ace and Luffy and dropped back in his seat to look out the window.

"Have you ever regretted your decision to adopt this child?"

The answer came immediately.

"No. Never. I admit it is sometimes exhausting and sometimes I reach my limits, but... he gives me and Marco so much joy."

"How old is he now?" 

"He is now four and is currently in a bit of a defiant phase."

"How do you guys do it with two jobs?"

"We work part-time and fortunately we can arrange our working hours so that someone is always there for him and otherwise spend every free minute we have with him."

"And what about you? With two jobs and a kid, where's the time for you?"

"Of course, this is not always easy and requires a mixture of planning and a willingness to be spontaneous, but it has worked quite well so far, even though we have to admit that we don't have much time left for ourselves. But we are really thankful for every minute we share alone.

"If I ask you a question, do you promise to answer me honestly?"

"Sure, go ahead."

"Do you think... I can raise a child? His and Nami's kid?! I mean, you know how fast I go up, I'm a ticking time bomb that can explode at any moment without warning! That's why Sanji and I often clash. What's it going to be like with a kid? Sanji would never hurt her, but I... I honestly don't know if I have the patience for a child."

"Did you talk to Sanji about this?"

"He should know best, after all we've been together for seven years!"

"You should still talk to him about it. Even if it's just to explain to him why you don't want kids. You owe him that much honesty."

"And if you don't, I'll lock you both up in our storeroom myself, understand?" Luffy warned him, but Zoro didn't listen to him at all anymore and stared thoughtfully out the window.

After a long and tiring day at work, Sanji just longed for a hot shower to wash off the stress of the day and then make himself comfortable in his bed with a cookbook Vivi had given him for his birthday. But all he could think of was the conversation he had with the cemetery caretaker today when he wanted to visit Nami for the first time since the funeral. 

Apparently, some lunatic had destroyed Nami's grave shortly after her funeral, but instead of letting him know, they had tried to restore the grave as best they could and keep the incident quiet. He would never have known anything if one of the cemetery gardeners who had decorated the grave with new flowers had not blabbed. When Sanji heard about this, he was furious and contacted the cemetery administration, who regretted the incident very much and offered to take over the grave care for the next three months for free, but Sanji didn't want to hear anything about it, because he was too shocked that there were people who dared to disturb Nami's resting place. He had talked to Nami, told her that he had been recognized as a father by the youth welfare office because of the paternity test and told her about his first meeting with their daughter and raved about how incredible she was and how much he was looking forward to their trip to the funfair together. 

Even though Nami couldn't answer him anymore, he felt a little better after he had also told her about all his grief with Zoro and that although he was angry at first that she hadn't told him about Sessa, he had forgiven her in the meantime.

Unfortunately, the high spirits didn't last long, because as soon as he entered the empty house, he was reminded again that he was now alone. At least until he was finally allowed to take Sessa to his home. He was looking forward to the day, even though he had no idea how he would manage to take care of his daughter on his own. In any case, he would only be able to work part-time, but with the monthly income that Nami had provided for Sessa, they would be able to get by. Sanji wondered what Zoro was doing right now and if he was okay when the doorbell rang. The blonde man looked at the clock and wondered who it could be and decided to go downstairs and check. His heart almost stopped when he saw Zoro's face through the peephole, and without further ado he opened the door, even though he was only wearing pyjama bottoms. The moss head looked very bad, his cheeks had collapsed and were pale, and under his eyes lay dark shadows that were testifying that he wasn´t sleeping enough.  
Zoro didn't even greet but said only four little words.

"We need to talk."


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello and welcome to chapter 9!
> 
> I´m sorry for the Little tease but I changed my mind and went a different route. I hope you can forgive me.  
> Thanks for all the kudos, you´re very sweet!  
> See you in two weeks!

Sanji woke up sweating. The heart in his chest beat up to his neck and his hand was shaking as he ran his hand through his sweaty hair. It was just a dream, his encounter with Zoro, just a pipe dream, and yet he was so upset as if it really happened. He must have fallen asleep while reading the cookbook, because he found it opened on the floor. Sanji rubbed his hands through his face to wake up and a look at the alarm clock which told him that it was 3.30 a.m. He probably would not be able to fall asleep again anyway, so he might as well get up and make himself a cup of tea or coffee. He slipped into his slippers and shuffled slowly to the door. Why had he only had that strange dream? Was it a wishful dream? And what would Zoro have to talk to him about? Why was his subconscious torturing him all the time? Sanji tried to shake off his thoughts. There were more important things than clinging to someone who did not want him anymore. And yet... he missed him terribly. Otherwise, he would not dream about him all the time. Or unconsciously roll over to his side at night and wake up in the morning with his face on Zoro's pillow, even though the sheets did not smell of him anymore because Sanji had changed them. Maybe he should change everything, buy some new furniture so that he was not reminded of him anymore…

Sanji was startled when he realized how much the thought frightened him and that he was not ready for this step yet. After all, it had not been that long ago, even though time dragged on, endlessly and agonizingly. At least when he was at home alone. When he was working, it went by in a flash, but as soon as he got home, he counted the hours until he fell asleep and tried to spend the rest of the time doing housework or cooking, trying to keep himself busy somehow. He could not wait to finally take Sessa in, even though he was a bit scared and quite nervous, because he knew nothing about her. He did not know her favorite food, nor her favorite show, or if she had any allergies or a favorite pet, and the realization filled him with sadness. There were so many things he still had to learn about her, but fortunately they had a lifetime to get to know each other. He might have missed the first two years of her life, but there were still so many things to look forward to.

Sessa's school enrolment, her first friends, her first love, her first break up, her graduation, her wedding, her first child... there were so many things waiting for him with her, things that Nami would unfortunately no longer be able to experience and his eyes filled with tears. Damn, when would he stop crying? Under no circumstances should he let himself go like this towards his daughter, she already had it hard enough. When Sanji passed the dresser in the hallway, he lifted the picture frame that was standing there and looked at the photo. It was a picture of Sessa, which the orphanage had taken and given it to him as a gift so that he could have a picture of her. She was sitting in a sandbox, shoveling sand into a plastic bucket, her little bare feet full of sand and her skin, slightly tanned. She didn't laugh in the photo, but he thought she was the most beautiful creature on earth, even if he had chosen a dress instead of these overalls and a big white sun hat with an extra wide brim and a pink bow. Once she lived with him, he would dress her like a princess and dedicate all his time to her to make up for the lost time. 

Sanji also took the other photo from the dresser, which was showing Nami bending her head over a huge milkshake she was sipping, a big smile on her face. He wondered if Sessa had inherited her smile. He hoped so. Nami could light up an entire room with a single smile and infect others with it, he remembered melancholically and stroked the picture frame tenderly with his thumb. "I promise you that she will never forget you Nami" he whispered lovingly and put both pictures back to make coffee and get ready for work. Since he had a key for the Baratié, he could come in at any time and start the preparations. He worked better when he was alone anyway. 

When he finally had time for a cigarette break around noon, he used it to call Vivi and ask her if she would like to join him on his first trip with Sessa, because he was quite nervous about it and was afraid to get emotional again if he was alone with her. Vivi was excited about his idea and they agreed to meet in front of the entrance of the funfair.  
After her conversation with Sanji, Vivi hung up the phone thoughtfully. She would finally meet Nami's daughter. She knew from Sanji that she was remarkably like Nami and she looked forward to the meeting with mixed feelings. On the one hand she was curious and very much looking forward to the meeting, but on the other hand she was also afraid of meeting Sessa, because the pain of losing her friend was still deep. And yet... she could not let Sanji hang, she could not let him and Zoro hang, because both needed her help. From Ace and Luffy she knew that Zoro had simply disappeared after his fight with Usopp and spent the night on a park bench where they had finally found him and taken him home. On the way he had confessed to them why he didn't want children and even though she could understand his motives she thought he gave up too quickly and should at least try, but to do that he had to talk to Sanji and that was only possible if they met. Vivi dialed Luffy's number who, as far as she knew, was at home. Luffy agreed to lure Zoro to the funfair and make sure they met by chance and promised to keep an eye on his cell phone so she could let him know when and where the two of them should run into each other and happily hung up the phone. Now all that remained was to hope that everything went the way they imagined it would.

When the first meeting was finally approaching, Vivi was so excited that she kept pacing up and down in front of the entrance to the fair, rubbing herself across her arms. If only I had put on a slightly thicker jacket, I would not be so cold now. It had become quite cool for this time of year and the sun had hidden behind a wall of clouds. Suddenly it occurred to her that she still had a cardigan in the trunk of her car and wondered how long it would take her to get to the car and back again, when she heard Sanji's voice greeting her with his outstretched arm, accompanied by a little girl he was holding by the hand, which could only be Sessa. Vivi was so overwhelmed by the sight of the red-blond hair, the two cute plaits and the curled eyebrows that she forgot to breathe completely until the two of them finally stood in front of her and Sanji introduced them to each other. Her neck scratched and her voice sounded hoarse as she slowly bent down to Sessa and gave her a nervous smile. "Hello Sessa" she said and swallowed as she looked into those big, dark eyes that were so similar to Nami's and somehow not, because in the little girl's eyes lay fear, insecurity and pain and not the determination and self-confidence that had always burned in Nami's eyes. No, Sessa seemed more fragile, more sensitive by nature, but after all she had experienced it was no wonder. After all, she was only two, practically a baby, who had just lost her mother and probably felt lonely and lost in a world full of strangers. Gently Vivi stretched out her hand and stroked over a small, rather dirty-looking brown cloth dog with long floppy ears, which Sessa was holding in her hand.

"That's a cute dog”, Vivi tried to break the ice, but apparently had the opposite effect because Sessa took the dog away from her and pressed it firmly against her as if she wanted to take it away from her. Embarrassed Vivi stood up and looked at Sanji apologetically but he smiled understandingly and offered to go for a warm drink before they looked around. The funfair was huge, and the corridors meandered like veins criss-crossed between lights of colorful, brightly lit vehicles and stalls. But Sanji, Vivi and Sessa followed the stream of people, who made their way to a large tent that rose from the crowd, from which loud music was heard. Inside the tent itself, it seemed to be even more crowded than outside and the bass of the loudspeakers boomed at them from all sides. Vivi welcomed the suggestion and offered to get the drinks but Sanji insisted on inviting her and left Vivi alone with Sessa who was still holding her stuffed dog anxiously. Vivi sensed that she did not like the music and tried to cover Sessa's ears with her hands, but the little one withdrew and the hope that they would understand each other more and more disappeared. Sighing, she pulled her cell phone out of her pocket to quickly write a message to Luffy before hastily stuffing it back into her pocket as Sanji was already returning with the hot drinks.

"It was quicker than I thought," he said and handed Vivi the steaming cup, which she received with thanks. The warmth felt good and the brown, hot liquid tasted like cocoa should taste. Sanji looked around as if he were looking for something and an expression of concern spread across his face.  
"Where is Sessa?" he asked and Vivi turned her head frantically in all directions and spilled the hot liquid on her jacket. Her heart beat fast and her hands trembled and clung to the cup. Where could she possibly be? It took her two minutes at most to type the message to Luffy, in that time Sessa could not have disappeared... Or could she? She had to be here! Vivi hoped and felt tears shoot into her eyes when she realized that she had lost Sessa the very first time Sanji had entrusted her with his child.  
"I am... I am so sorry, Sanji! I just wasn't paying attention for a moment!" she swore, but Sanji shook his head. "If I did, it's all my fault! I should never have dragged her to a fair, dragged you into that tent and left you alone with Sessa. She must have gotten scared and fled..." Vivi was almost torn apart when she noticed the reproachful look in his eyes that was meant for him alone and she wanted to slap herself that Sessa had disappeared due to her inattention. Sanji suggested to split up and look for her separately and to inform each other immediately by cell phone if they had found her and stormed off before Vivi could even wish him luck. If only everything was just a nightmare from which she could just wake up...  
She did not even know where to start looking. And even if she found her, she probably would not go with her... She tried to suppress the budding panic and concentrate, because fear would only make it harder to think. Tediously she squeezed her way through the crowd and asked each person if they had seen Sessa, but they all shook their heads and the panic kept on closing her throat as she desperately tried to keep calm. When her cell phone beeped, Vivi tore it out of her pocket and prayed that Sanji had found her. Unfortunately, the received message was not from Sanji but from Luffy who asked her if they were still in the tent and that he and Zoro were on their way to them because he was hungry. Vivi decided to call Luffy and her voice almost rolled over as she tried to tell him what had happened over the noise. After repeating her story a few times, Luffy finally understood and promised to come right away and hung up immediately after he finished his sentence. So, her original plan that Zoro and Sanji would meet by chance was ruined, but she did not care if they just found Sessa, and as soon as possible. She could only guess what fears the little girl was going through, what fears Sanji was going through right now and hoped that they would find Sessa as soon as possible. She called Sessa's name loudly and hoped to lure her, but her voice was completely drowned in the loud babble of voices and the music coming out of the loudspeakers and her desperation tore off her chest more and more. But even Sanji seemed unable to find her and she cursed her silent cell phone, cursed herself and prayed to receive a sign of life from Sessa, a whimper, a sob, or to see her red-blonde hair somewhere among all the people. Again, her cell phone beeped, telling her that they were in the tent but had not found a little girl yet and asked where she was. Vivi typed that she was standing at the beverage stand waiting for them while she kept looking around hoping to find Sanji somewhere. Her hand put the cup down on the counter and pushed it to a waiter who looked at it questioningly because it was almost full, but Vivi just shook her head. She was just too sick to even take a sip. All that mattered now was Sessa.  
When she finally saw Zoro's green hair, she would have loved to fall around their necks in gratitude and joy, but she held back when she saw the sinister expression on his face with which he pierced her, and lowered her gaze guiltily. "Where is Sanji," Luffy asked.  
"I don't know, I..."   
"Why did you go to a fair with her anyway?" Zoro asked reproachfully and crossed his arms in front of his chest. Vivi could literally feel his anger, the rage he must have had at her for trying to trick him, but she did not regret anything. Except that she had let Sessa out of her sight.  
"Because it's not far from the orphanage, that's why..." a voice behind Zoro suddenly replied abruptly and everyone but Zoro turned to the voice. Vivi held her hand in front of her mouth so as not to cry out loud when she saw him and especially Sessa, who he was holding by the hand. Her little face was covered with red spots and little tears rolled out of her eyes, which she shed over her stuffed dog, which she pressed tightly against her. Vivi looked at Zoro who was completely fossilized and could see how the muscles on his upper arms tensed and his whole upper body cramped at the sound of Sanji's voice. It was the first time they had met since their break up and Vivi had hoped that this meeting would help them to get back together, but considering the situation, this was probably not possible anymore. All they could do now was try to make the best of the situation and try to save this day somehow. Luffy scrutinized Sessa closely, seemingly trying to memorize every detail of her face, but then he got down on all fours, barking loudly and spinning in circles as if chasing an invisible tail. Sessa, however, watched Luffy closely and even allowed him to come crawling towards her on all fours. His head was gently stroking the back of her hands and the stuffed dog she was holding. "Jump on, jump on" he barked and Vivi opened her eyes in disbelief as Sessa let Sanji´s hand go and climbed on Luffy´s back who was laying before her.  
"Luffy, please be careful," Sanji asked him and would have liked to take her down again, but then Luffy slowly trotted through the people, who formed a small passage for him and turned his head to Sanji before he left the tent with Sessa.   
"Don't worry Sanji, we'll be fine. You better talk to Zoro, he has become even grumpier since your breakup than before. What about you, Vivi? You look like you could use some fresh air. Vivi looked at Sanji, who looked more like he did not want to be alone with Zoro, but she followed Luffy and gave Sanji an apologetic look as she walked out. His heart was racing as he turned and saw Zoro for the first time in weeks. He looked as terrible as Sanji felt, and although he had wanted this breakup himself, he felt sorry for Zoro, because he knew only too well how he felt since he felt the same way. Still, he tried not to show any pain, or this bitter-sweet happiness that came over him at the sight of Zoro and withstood his sinister look.  
"Did you know about this?" Zoro asked, whose voice vibrated menacingly.  
"You mean from the obviously arranged meeting between us? No, I didn't know that, but I should have guessed Vivi would try something like that. It wouldn't be the first time."  
"Do you want a drink?" Sanji asked, and Zoro nodded without taking his eyes off him. Even when they were standing at the counter, he could still feel the look of the moos head that kept giving him furtive looks.  
"Can you stop staring at me?!" he finally asked him, as the glances slowly became uncomfortable and almost tore the glass of mineral water from the waiter's hand as he tried to put it down in front of him.   
"I'm not staring!"   
"Yes, you are!"  
"I bet you wish!" Zoro took a big sip from his glass and got a disapproving look from Sanji.   
"What?! I'm thirsty!"  
"But do you have to drink whiskey at this hour? A beer will do!"  
"What's it to you? We're not together anymore, so stay the hell out of my life!" Zoro yelled and wished he had not said it at that moment. Since his conversation with Ace and Luffy, he had been thinking about how and if he should even explain to the cook why he did not want children. On the other hand, what would that change? Nothing, really, and yet... he wanted to tell him, explain why it didn't work, he wanted him to understand, to realize that there was no turning back, but not here, surrounded by all these people. Zoro took one last sip with which he emptied the glass and with a nod of his head he asked the cook to follow him. Sanji hesitated at first, but then his curiosity prevailed, and he followed Zoro outside. Silently they walked next to each other for a long time and Sanji wondered when Zoro would finally talk, because he felt something was on his mind.  
"Listen cook, it... the reason why I... what I'm trying to say is... I can't be with you anymore..."  
Sanji clenched his teeth and buried his fists deep into the pocket of his pants.   
"I already knew that... Anything else?"  
"Will you let me finish, damn it? Let me explain why... it is not just because I do not like kids, I cannot deal with them. I do not like them, and they do not like me.  
Besides, you know how fast I explode, I have absolutely no patience with children and I would only lose my temper sooner or later."   
Sanji understood his concerns, but he was disappointed that Zoro just gave up and did not even want to try, with him and Sessa, that he did not give her a chance to get to know her.  
"Then that was your last word? You just give up? Throw away seven years and me with it? You've never given up in your life and you're going to start with the most important thing of all?"  
"What part didn't you understand? The part that I hate kids? Or that I don't have the patience for them?"  
"You have been patient with us for seven years! Granted, we have had each other's backs a lot, and you are terribly stubborn and irascible, but we have managed somehow. Always. We even got over our break-up, I came back to you because I love you and I even..."  
"I know what you gave up for me that day! But the situation is different now. Why can't you get it through your head that I don't like children?"  
"Have you ever dealt with children? Except when you were a kid?"  
"What's that got to do with it? But, yes, I've seen them hiding from me in the supermarket or on the street when they saw me."  
"But only because they are deceived by your appearance. They do not know you, not like I do. And you do not know them. Who knows, maybe one day you'll take them into your heart..."  
"Do you even know what you're asking me to do?! To raise your and Namis child?! "I..." Zoro froze in the middle of the sentence because Luffy suddenly appeared with Vivi. The little girl was still sitting on his back, wearing Luffy's straw hat on her head. A shiver slowly crept up his spine and the sight of her big, fawn brown eyes paralyzed him. Earlier he had not been able to see her because his back had been to her, but now that he was facing her, he couldn't ignore her anymore and the sight was like a punch in the pit of his stomach.

"Oh man, I can't any more..." Luffy moaned and took Sessa gently off his back to get up, but as soon as he got up, Sessa spat on Luffy's jacket.  
"Eww, that's disgusting! Here Zoro, hold her for a sec," RLuffy ordered and without further ado pressed the child into his arms, who held her more by reflex than by free will as he was still in shock. No matter how much he forced himself, he just couldn't take his eyes off her brown eyes, which were staring at him anxiously, and certainly not off her mouth, from which first a soft whimper and then a pitiful weeping came, which finally freed Zoro from his shocked state. Wordlessly, he pressed the child into Sanji's arms and simply left without saying anything, ignoring the calls from Luffy and Vivi who asked him where he wanted to go.  
But Zoro just wanted to get away and accelerated his steps which became faster and faster until he finally ran. His feet just carried him away, somewhere, as long as it was far enough away from the cook and Nami's mini-double, while darkness slowly spread over him and night fell on him, and he only stopped when his lungs burned and he had no strength to run any further. His fingertips pressed so hard into the palms of his hands that they bled, and he screamed his frustration into the night sky until his vocal cords hurt and he was hoarse. All the pain, anger and sadness he had been carrying around all this time suddenly burst out of him.  
"I hate you, you hear me? I fucking hate you, you selfish bitch! I thought we were friends! Instead you just fuck off without saying anything! You call that friendship? Is that why you kept quiet and chose to fuck off like a coward? Is that why you did not tell us you were ill? Out of consideration? Then why did you give us your kid? Did you really expect me to forgive you for your one-night stand with Sanji? That I would forgive you for disappearing that night? For worrying us sick about you? You know what? Fuck you!!!"  
In a rage Zoro kicked a garbage can which then tipped over and spread itself across the road. Like a madman, he kicked and punched a bench next to it until his fingers bled and the bench splintered, but still he did not feel any better, he just screamed louder and more desperate until his cries turned into sobs. His whole body trembled as tears ran down his face and he allowed himself to finally speak the truth out loud.  
"I miss you Nami! I miss you so damn much! It hurts... it hurts so badly!" he finally croaked hoarsely and sank down exhausted in front of what was left of the bench, sobbing uncontrollably.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I´m going to do a little break from writing, I will give you the new chapter now.  
> Please don´t be mad with me, but there will be so much going on in my life in the next weeks that I won´t be able to upload any chapters.  
> But I hope you will keep following my story.

Sanji tried to forget his encounter with Zoro and concentrated on converting his study room into a dormitory for Sessa, who would soon spend her first night on trial in her new home. Despite Nami's trust fund and the notary's approval, he had decided to pay for the renovation himself and buy her new furniture because he did not like Sessa's room in Nami's old apartment which was not girlish enough for him. His princess should get the most beautiful princess room, so he called his buddy Franky to make him the most beautiful canopy bed you could get for money and asked Usopp not only to paint the walls, but also to conjure beautiful motives of fairies, unicorns and fairytale castles on the walls and planned with him how her walk-in closet should look like, before he went shopping with Vivi for new clothes, shoes and toys for Sessa. Sanji even took online courses in braiding so that he could give Sessa beautiful braided and pinned-up hairstyles and was looking forward to the day when her hair was long enough.  
Time flew by and thanks to Sanji's constant requests for changes, they were just about finished with her dormitory when the day of the overnight stay finally came.  
Sanji had thought about baking something with Sessa and had bought all kinds of ingredients for it and had studied Swedish baking recipes for days to be prepared for every wish, because he knew how much Nami loved the Swedish kitchen and was therefore sure that she had cooked Swedish dishes for Sessa all the time. However, he had asked the orphanage if there was anything Sessa liked to eat and if they knew of any food allergies, but they didn't know of any and Sanji was relieved because his biggest concern was that she would suffer an allergic shock and he had to drive her to the hospital.  
When the time finally came, Luffy called him and wanted to know exactly when Sessa was coming and when he should be there. Sanji wanted his daughter for himself on her first evening, but he already guessed that Luffy would not be turned away anyway and so he told him to come at 6 p.m. Since Sessa arrived at 2 p.m., they had enough time to bake until his troublemaker friend showed up. Well, he could not be angry with Luffy, after all he loved Nami just as much. Besides, he was the only one so far who had immediately found a connection to her, for which he envied him a bit, because his relationship with Sessa, was still distant, because she didn't let him hug her or touch her in any other way and wasn't allowed to touch anything further than her hand.  
Nevertheless, Sanji never let his disappointment show and was patient, because she had gone through a lot in a short time. In the meantime he had also met her therapist, a dark-haired, racy beauty, to get information from her about the developmental stage of his daughter, who also advised him to be patient with her, because the experience with her mother had been very traumatic for her and because of her fear of loss, she would probably have difficulties in rebuilding trust in another person. When he had told her about Luffy and how quickly he had built up a relationship with Sessa, she was as surprised as he was and asked how well he and Luffy knew each other and was relieved that they were such good friends, because it was important that Sessa was surrounded by people who belonged to the inner circle to create a stable environment for her, which helped her to deal with her issues.  
Above all, he should, if possible, try to speak to her in her mother's language, as it would give her some familiarity and make it easier for him to build up a bond with her. For this reason, Sanji tried to improve his Swedish at work and in his spare time, which had become a bit rusty because he had no opportunity to use it.

His heart was racing on their way from the driveway to the house and he hoped that his daughter would not be bothered by his sweaty hand leading her to the house.  
"This is my house, Sessa. It is not big, but... I hope you like it," he said hopefully, looking at his daughter, who slowly trotted behind him in silence, looking at the house with big eyes. To break the prolonged silence, Sanji told her about his plans and listed a number of things he wanted to bake with her, trying to pronounce the Swedish names as best he could, hoping she would understand and maybe be happy about it. Unfortunately, she showed no signs of emotion, except maybe fear, because he had to help a little bit to make her follow him.  
When the door behind them fell into the lock, Sanji let go of her hand and ran in front of her into the hallway, spreading his arms while he turned to her and smiled encouragingly.  
"Välkommen, Sessa*!" he greeted her in Swedish, but still she showed no emotion, but only pressed her stuffed dog against her and seemed rather lost than at home. Sanji wondered what he could do to make her feel more comfortable. Maybe he should call Luffy and tell him to come earlier? No, he had to manage on his own if he wanted to live with her in the future. Gently he took her hand and led her through the whole house first, deliberately showing the children's room at the end, as he, Usopp, Franky and Vivi were very proud of the result, and led her into the candy pink princess's room with the white, ornate furniture and the starry canopy over the pink lacquered horse-drawn carriage in which she was to sleep, which was tied to two white stuffed horses.  
"Detta är ditt rum** he announced and gently pushed Sessa into the room so she could look at everything. With difficulty she let herself be moved to enter the room and stopped in the middle, surrounded by dozens of toys, shelves with children's books and beautifully decorated, handmade furniture that would probably make any little girl's heart beat faster, except his daughter's. He was overcome with doubt. Had he been so wrong? Wasn't it for fairy tale castles and unicorns? Sanji tried to cover up his disappointment by overly cheerful asking Sessa to follow him into the kitchen and gently pulled her into the kitchen behind him.  
Sanji carefully placed Sessa on a kitchen chair that he pushed against the kitchen counter and explained in simple words what he intended to do with her and helped her every step of the way. In the beginning she worked very hesitantly and tore her hand away from him again and again, but when she saw her first finished results she became more confident and let him help her more and more, even seemed to have fun somehow, at least she couldn't stop baking more and more cookies and cupcakes and seemed visibly disappointed, when Sanji showed her that they didn't have enough ingredients for more baked goods, but he promised her that from now on they would bake more often if she wanted them to, whereupon Sessa nodded barely noticeably and Sanji got a beaming smile because they had found something they both liked to do. Maybe the baking reminded her of her time with Nami, who had tried to bake something herself every now and then and had been quite skilled.  
When Sanji pulled the last pieces out of the oven, the doorbell rang. 

"This is Luffy," he explained, whereupon Sessa jumped out of her chair and ran to the door on her little legs. Apparently, she remembered Luffy very well and pulled on his legs as soon as he entered the door. The black-haired man didn't understand at first, but laughed as Sessa sat down on her stuffed dog and jumped up and down on it as if she were riding it, and he went down on his knees in front of her and helped her climb on his back.  
Sanji followed them into the kitchen at some distance and grinned as Luffy sat Sessa down on a chair and threw himself over the delicious treats. After putting a few pieces of pastry on Sessa's plate, he began to take the pastries off the plate with his mouth and chew them, asking Sessa to do the same, which made her do the same thing, smacking loudly.

"Yummy, huh? "Your father is not only a great cook, but also a fantastic baker."  
Sanji froze when he heard the word father and threw a warning glance at Luffy, who did not seem to notice it, but rubbed his hand over his full stomach and burped audibly. Apparently, he had forgotten again that they had agreed that he was not allowed to mention to Sessa that Sanji was Sessa's father and felt anger germinate when the doorbell rang again. Wondering who it was, Sanji went to the door and was amazed when he saw Usopp holding a bag in his hand and announced that he wanted to keep them company and pushed past Sanji before he could protest.   
Usopp was in high spirits and babbled wildly, telling Sanji which children's books from his collection he had brought Sessa while he went into the kitchen and told him about his latest book when he suddenly stopped, as soon as he saw Sessa still sitting at the kitchen table with Luffy.

"Hey Usopp! Look who is here! Sessa!" Luffy cried out unnecessarily when he saw his friend coming to the door, ignoring the disbelief and amazement on Usopp's face as he came closer.

"Isn't it amazing how similar she is to our Nami? It's almost as if she were still with us!" he continued to babble unperturbed and did not notice how Usopp inconspicuously wiped his sleeve over his eyes and sniffed audibly.

"Yes, that's her," he said and still could not believe how much like her she was and how the sight upset him. In all those years he had never stopped thinking about Nami, but over time he had tried to suppress the fact that he missed her. At least until that moment.  
Trembling, he knelt down and introduced himself to her, while he held out a handful of his children's books to her and gave her a little summary of each book, which didn't seem to interest her, except for one manga he had drawn years ago, called One Piece. Usopp slowly flipped through the manga for Sessa while he told her about the individual characters, all of which were based on his friends, not only the character but also the appearance, which is why he had gotten into trouble especially with Sanji and Zoro, who didn't agree that they were characters in a manga. So even now, when Sanji angrily ripped the manga out of his hands and told him that he did not want him to show Sessa such things.  
Usopp excused himself and sat down at the table to eat some of the delicacies as well. After dinner Luffy suggested building a castle of sheets whereas Usopp could tell stories until Sessa had to go to bed and carried Sessa on his shoulders to her bedroom while Sanji and Usopp carried the chairs they needed for the tent. When everyone had made themselves comfortable under the sheets, Usopp began to tell the story of the little ladybug, who was excluded from everyone because it had no points and therefore painted some on his back to belong to the group, whereupon everyone played with him. But then the rain came and washed away the dots, whereupon all the other ladybirds were horrified, and the spotless ladybird was sad about it. But then one of the ladybirds shouted that it didn't matter if it had dots or not, because all that mattered was that it was a great ladybird to have fun with, whereupon the other ladybirds happily agreed and from then on the spotless ladybird was never alone again.  
Sessa seemed to be glued to Usopp's lips, who literally captivated her with his imaginative stories and tried to stay awake if possible, but soon her eyes closed and Sanji put her to bed. Usopp and Luffy, however, sneaked out of the room quietly as Usopp wanted to go home and offered Luffy to drive him home but the latter just wouldn't go, even when Law sent him a message asking when he was coming home.

"But I can't sleep yet. I'm still kind of wired," Luffy confessed and asked if he could stay over at Sanji's and promised to look after Sessa in the morning and bring her back to the home while he went to work. Since Luffy was not working, he was always at home because he could not hold a job long enough, so at some point he decided to give up searching until he found something he enjoyed. Still, Sanji had considered not to leave Sessa with him as he was just too immature and childish to take responsibility for a child, as her trip to the funfair had shown when he stuffed Sessa full of candy until she finally threw up. Luffy was visibly disappointed when Sanji refused his offer and finally followed Usopp to the car.

Sanji was relieved and went to bed, where he slept for at least three hours until he was finally woken by loud crying. Sleep drunk as he was, he did not realize at first that it was Sessa. It was only when she clearly called for her mummy that his brain realized that it was his daughter speaking and ran barefoot down the stairs to the ground floor. Sessa paced through the room in the dark, calling her mama's name over and over again while holding her stuffed dog close to her and didn't even react when Sanji turned on the light in the room to see why she was screaming like that.  
"What's wrong, Sessa? Did you have a nightmare? Come here," Sanji asked and tried to hug her to calm her down but she kept pushing his arms away and ran screaming and crying around the room looking for her mommy. Her eyes were wide open, yet they seemed strangely empty and staring, almost like undead, and a shiver ran down Sanji's spine as he slowly realized that she was still dreaming with her eyes open. Sanji felt helpless as he didn't know what to do, after all, because he had never dealt with sleepwalkers before and although the orphanage had warned him that something like this might happen, he had hoped that a family atmosphere, the Swedish cuisine and especially Luffy could help her to feel comfortable with him.

"Sessa, dear, it's all right, I'm here," he tried to calm her down and pulled her into his arms. She flailed around wildly and continued to scream desperately for her mommy, yet Sanji continued to hold her and sang as softly and gently as he could, a song that Nami had once taught him when she had tried to teach him some Swedish while he carried Sessa around the room pressed to his chest, caressing her hair tenderly.  
Blinka lilla stjärna***  
Blinka lilla stjärna där  
Hur jag undrar var du är  
Fjärran lockar du min syn  
Lik en diamant i skyn  
Blinka lilla stjärna där  
Hur jag undrar var du är

När varma solen borta är  
När inget finns att lysa på  
Då visar du ditt lilla ljus  
Blinkandes under natten  
Blinka lilla stjärna där  
Hur jag undrar var du är

I mörkblå himlen så djup  
Ser ofta in bak min gardin  
För du blundar aldrig nej  
Till morgonsolen rest sig  
Blinka lilla stjärna där  
Hur jag undrar var du är

Blinka lilla stjärna där  
Hur jag undrar var du är

*Welcome, Sessa  
**This is your room  
*** Swedish version of Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello,
> 
> I did my best to finish the chapter. I´m really sorry for the wait, but I´m thankful for your patience. Thank you so much for all the kudos and to Sozyj for your kind comment. I really appreciate it!  
> Now enjoy the new chapter!  
> See you in two weeks!

Sanji almost crushed Vivi when she came to the restaurant after his shift and took a seat on the chair, he offered her. At the sight of the delicious food, her mouth watered because she hadn't eaten since breakfast.  
"You shouldn't have, Sanji," she said and blushed as her stomach growled loudly. Sanji smiled and served her.  
"Your stomach and I both seem disagree. After all, it's been a few weeks since we saw each other and that should be celebrated. So please allow me to spoil you tonight as compensation for choosing my work over you."  
Vivi watched him pour her a drink, saw the dark rings under his eyes and the tired face that underlined his exhaustion and reached out her hand to caress his cheek tenderly.  
"I know you are doing this to have more time for Sessa when she finally moves in with you, but... you are not helping her by suddenly collapsing from exhaustion..."  
Sanji stroked the back of her hand lovingly and kissed the ball of her hand.  
"Don't worry, mon amour, I know how much I can take. I just want to have enough money to offer her something, because I don't want to draw on her trust fund."  
"Sessa doesn't need any luxuries or money, just her father, safe and sound. When is it going to happen?"  
Sanji's face lit up as he sat down at the other end of the table.  
"Two more days. I'm so excited Vivi, I can't wait..."

Vivi sensed that there was something else, something he didn't tell her, but she didn't insist, but waited for him to start talking on his own, which he finally did with a loud sigh. He told her that he was also afraid that fatherhood would overwhelm him, that he would not be able to do it alone because Sessa needed more attention than he had thought and he confessed to her about Sessa's first night at his place and how she had walked around the room looking for Nami. Vivi's hand was looking for his on the table to press it gently. She tried to speak as calmly as she could, which was difficult given the overwhelming need to cry, but somehow, she managed to suppress this impulse while trying to say the next words.  
"It's only natural that she misses her, she probably still doesn't understand what happened. Has... has she had a chance to say goodbye to her? Did you take her to the cemetery?"  
Vivi would have loved to slap herself when she saw the horrified look in his eyes, because he hadn't thought about it at all and feelings of guilt were written all over his face.  
"It's not too late to catch up. You could write a farewell letter together and put it on Nami's grave. "I'm sure it will help Sessa deal with her mother's death."  
Sanji nodded and Vivi promised to help him any way she could.  
"You can always count on me, Sanji. Besides, the distraction will do me good."

Something in Vivi's voice made Sanji prick up his ears and wonder if everything was all right. Vivi was ashamed of her words. Actually, she hadn't wanted to say anything, but the subject just wouldn't leave her alone and somehow she felt the need to talk to someone about it and declared her worries unfounded.  
"Kohza hasn't checked in for weeks and no one knows exactly where his unit is right now. I know he can't always get in touch with me, and we've had times when we haven't heard from each other in a while, but somehow... I just can't shake the feeling off that something's wrong.  
Since his right hand was still under Vivi´s, he took his left hand and put it on Vivi´s. In a calm and gentle voice, he assured her that everything was fine, that Kohza was tough and probably already writing a long love letter somewhere that she would soon receive.

Vivi had to smile at Sanji's words because Kohza was anything but a great writer, and when he got the chance to write a letter and send it off, his letters were usually no longer than a few lines. But they were always full of love and anticipation of their soon reunion. With her hand she wiped a single tear from her eye and looked at Sanji in surprise when he suddenly pulled his cell phone out of his pocket.  
"Hello, Corby, how are you? Why are you calling me so late?" Sanji's face grew more and more serious as he listened intently to his friend who worked at the police station.  
Vivi wondered if the call had something to do with Zoro and the thought that something might have happened to him frightened her, on the other hand it didn't look like it, because Sanji remained completely calm, even though he was getting paler and paler.  
"I see. Thanks for your call, Corby. You keep me posted if there is any news, okay? And let me see you at the Baratié again, I'd love to cook something for you and your girlfriend, you are still together with this lovely woman, aren't you? What was her name, Rebecca? Really? Why the fuck didn't you say anything? Then we must celebrate your engagement. And you better invite me to your wedding. How's Zoro doing? I don't know... We're not together anymore. Yes, it's a long story. I'll tell you some other time, ok? Yes, bye. And thanks for calling."

Vivi was almost bursting with anticipation and asked Sanji why he called. Sanji told her that the police had found the man who had broken into his house dead in an alley with a needle in his arm, but that they couldn't identify him because he had no papers with him, nor were his fingerprints registered anywhere and there were also no dental records to check his identity. Vivi didn't know what to say and preferred to remain silent, just like Sanji who seemed thoughtful and depressed at the same time. This man might have robbed him and even attacked him, but he still felt pity for him and for that she loved him even more. Of all the people she knew, Sanji had the biggest heart one could ever imagine. Especially for the poorest of the poor, the homeless, for whom he had set up a soup kitchen to give anyone who wanted a warm meal, which he conjured up from the leftovers of the day. It was incomprehensible to her that Zoro could not bring himself to forgive Sanji and give them a chance, but after all, she couldn't force them to be happy. Still, it almost tore her heart apart that Sanji now had to take care of Sessa alone. Well, not completely alone, after all he had her.

When Sanji picked Sessa up from the orphanage two days later, the director of the orphanage was happy, but also a bit melancholic, because she had taken Sessa into her heart. She would have loved to hug her, but since she knew that she did not like to be hugged, she just smiled at her and wished her all the best.  
Sessa didn't let on whether she was sad or happy about the goodbye but silently followed Sanji to the car which she headed towards and brought a smile to his face. At least she went along with him voluntarily, which was a good sign for him.  
After Sanji had buckled Sessa's seatbelt, he pressed her stuffed dog into her hand again, the only one she let near her at all, except Luffy, and Sanji felt something like jealousy and got angry about it. Don't be ridiculous, that's completely nonsense. One day you'll be able to get through to her and build a real father-daughter relationship with her.  
The trip went smoothly, as always, because she still didn't speak a word. Her psychologist had Sanji that he had to be patient, but that was not so easy, because he would like to know what was going on in her little head, what she thought, what she felt, what was depressing her. But most of all he wished to hear the word daddy come out of her mouth at least once. Or even just Sanji, that would be enough for him to know that she perceived him, that she didn't just see him as one of many, but as someone special, someone who was important to her, as stupid as it sounded.  
At home, he first put her bag in the hallway and offered to cook something together, as it was soon time for dinner. Sessa followed him wordlessly into the kitchen and climbed onto the chair with the help of the stool he had bought for her, just as he had shown her a dozen times since she was visiting him regularly. Even though she had already done it a dozen times, he still stood behind her and made sure she didn't fall down.  
He chose Kötbullar with mashed potatoes and cranberry compote and had Sessa assist him with the cooking again. Sessa enthusiastically formed the little meatballs and kept snacking on the cranberry compote. Cooking together had become a small ritual between them, which meant more to Sanji than anything else and he was happy because he felt that this activity brought them a little closer together. He had also learned that children ate their self-prepared meals with more enthusiasm and smiled when he saw Sessa eagerly stuffing the small meatballs into her mouth with her spoon. It made him happy to see that she liked it so much, especially since she had always eaten like a sparrow in the orphanage, as he had learned. So, he had offered to give the cook at the orphanage private cooking lessons or at least let him have a few of his recipes, but the cook had been outraged by the offer and declined.  
After dinner, he lured Sessa into the living room with some homemade oat-walnut cookies and told her to sit on the couch while he took some photo albums out of the cupboard and put them on the coffee table before he opened the top handle and opened it.  
It was kind of strange to flip through all those pictures from times gone by and see Nami on them, alive and cheerful, as if she were still alive. It still felt surreal and even though some time had passed, he still hoped that she would suddenly walk through the door and that it would all turn out to be just a stupid nightmare and his initial euphoria with which he told Sessa the story of each picture evaporated with each additional picture.  
Not only because he realized that Nami was dead and thus belonged to the past, but also that his relationship with Zoro was over, who also stared at him from almost every third picture. I have lost the two most important people in my life, he remarked bitterly and without warning he slammed the photo album, whereupon Sessa flinched in horror.  
"I'm sorry, Sessa, I didn't mean to scare you. I just..."  
Sanji thought about what to say, how to explain to Sessa as gently as possible why he suddenly felt so sad. He had read many parenting guides in the last weeks, which all gave him different tips on how to raise Sessa, but in the end, he came to the conclusion that he had to find his own way to deal with the situation and Sessa and to pass on not only Namis but also his values to her.  
And one of his values was honesty, even if it hurt. Sanji sighed and looked down on his little daughter who was still staring at the book on his lap as if she were waiting for him to open it again any moment.  
"...you know, sometimes I just get terribly sad when I think of Mommy. I love her so much, probably as much as you love her, and there is not a day that goes by that I don't miss her. That is why I often look at these photo albums, to remember her, her laughter, her passion, her outbursts of anger when she was angry with me and Zoro ... And even if I'm sad that she's gone, I feel a little better because I know that even if I can't see her anymore, she's 'here', he said and tapped his forehead and then pointed to the spot where his heart was and said 'and here'.  
"I know this is hard for you to understand, but believe me, as long as you think of her she will always be with you, even if you can't see her anymore," Sanji said and swallowed the thick lump in his throat.  
"Mommy would never have left you voluntarily, I know that, but... unfortunately she was terribly sick, so sick that her body became too weak to defend itself. "But... but if you like, if you agree, I would be very happy to take care of you from now on."  
Sanji struggled desperately against the tears as he tried to ask the all-important question, he was so afraid of. Surely it wouldn't change anything because he was responsible for her now and whether she wanted to or not, she would have to stay with him. Nevertheless, it was important for him to know that she wanted to live with him, that she liked to be with him, that maybe she loved him as much as he had started to love her in the last weeks.  
"Are you okay with me taking care of you?"  
Sanji held his breath while he waited for an answer, but Sessa only silently pressed her stuffed dog against her chest. Probably she didn't have an answer yet, after all they didn't know each other long enough, this place here was just too strange to her, he was almost a stranger for her and he decided to give her some time to answer, even if it was hard. Instead he fetched a paper and pencil and sat down next to Sessa and told her that he wanted to write a letter to her mother to say goodbye to her and told her what he wrote down. Sessa watched as his hand slipped over the paper and letters appeared on it as if by magic.  
When Sanji ended, Sessa suddenly took the pen and the piece of paper out of his hand and drew something under the letter which Sanji could only recognize as a drawing and was touched that Sessa contributed to the letter by painting a picture for her mother. After Sanji had put the letter in an envelope, he looked at the clock. The cemetery closed in an hour, which was enough to pay Nami a quick visit and show Sessa the place where she could visit her mother whenever she wanted to be close to her.  
When sometime later they stood in front of Nami's grave and Sessa put the letter on the grave, they had no idea that they were being watched from the distance. Only when they had almost left the cemetery the person approached the grave and picked up the letter and opened it to read what was written in it.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello,
> 
> this time you get a short chapter, because I have been very busy lately. Sorry for that! I promise the next chapter will be longer.  
> Thanks to Sozyj and DINAPOO for their comments and of course for the kudos.  
> See you in two weeks!

Sanji squinted at the 1-meter tall picture of his daughter hanging over the kitchen door and gave Zeff a mocking look, which he deliberately ignored because he was busy cooking. He had to admit that Sessa looked ravishing with her face full of gooseberry ice cream, but in his opinion a smaller picture would have done the trick as well, because it distracted him quite a bit from his work as he couldn't stop looking at it.

"Is that really necessary? You can see Sessa anytime you want."  
"That's just it, you've been keeping her away from me the whole time. Besides, we're very busy at the moment, so I'll be lucky if I can make it home with my back tonight."  
"Then retire and let me run this place so I can make it a four-star restaurant!"  
"That's what you want, rookie! I'd rather leave it to my granddaughter after I've taught her everything about cooking. Speaking of which, when is she gonna get to know her dear grandpa?"  
"Soon, okay?" 

Zeff grunted with satisfaction and kept stirring his bowl. They had a mixer for that, but the old man still preferred to stir everything by hand, just like the dinosaur he was. Sanji shook his head in amazement at his old man while he tried not to fall asleep at work. Since they had written the farewell letter to Nami, Sessa didn't run screaming through the room at night anymore, but she continued to sleepwalk, always coming up with new ideas on how to keep him on his toes. Last night she had smeared strange symbols on the walls of her bedroom with wax crayons. He had spent the whole night cleaning the wallpaper and kept himself awake with coffee as much as possible. In the long run, however, it couldn't go on like this, otherwise his tiredness would affect his work. Or worse, he would make mistakes with Sessa and he had to prevent that at all costs. Again, and again he felt the stern looks of Zeff, which literally pierced him and followed him suspiciously at every turn. Probably his tiredness was noticeable, but he would do everything not to commit any mistakes, so that the old man had a reason to throw him out of the kitchen. Hopefully Vivi got along with Sessa, who had offered to look after her until Sessa had a seat in a kindergarden. Luffy had also offered to look after her, but Sanji didn't want that because he knew that Zoro was currently living with him and Law, so he had declined.  
They still didn't talk to each other and avoided any contact, although Luffy had already tried to organize a game night with alcohol and video games, as they had done before. He could understand the anger of his friend, who was sad that they didn't do anything together anymore, he missed hanging out with the whole gang too, but he just wasn't ready to deal with Zoro normally. If he was ever able to. Could they ever just be friends? And what if they weren't? He didn't want his friends to always have to choose between him and Zoro in all their activities. Zeff yelled at him not to dream and to go faster. Sanji snorted back that he was already hurrying and suppressed any thoughts of Zoro for the time being.

Zoro and Luffy spent the morning watching Luffy's favorite show. It took Zoro a lot of self-control not to strangle him.  
"Damn Luffy, you have to watch this shit all day long?” Zoro mumbled, whose lower jaw was still a bit numb from the injection the dentist had given him. At least he had been given the day off, so he didn't have to bother with it at work and was able to numb the pain with alcohol as well, because the programme they were watching couldn't be tolerated any other way. He had never understood what Luffy liked about this series, which he loved so idolatrously that he watched it over and over again, although he knew all the dialogues by heart by now. He was already drinking his third beer when an all-too-familiar voice blasted through the TV speakers and drank the rest of the can empty in one go.  
"Germa 66 is not shitty! Just look at these cool costumes! Aren't they awesome? And look at Stealth Black! Man, I wish I could make myself invisible too! He's the coolest of them all!" Luffy said, enthusiastically drumming his fists on the table and swinging them through the air as a dozen men simply fainted when Stealth Black suddenly reappeared behind them. When it came to his favorite show, there was no stopping for him, who cheered like a little boy, much to Law´s displeasure, who came stomping out of the bedroom furiously.  
"I'm trying to sleep! Unlike you lot, I've just finished a double shift!"  
Luffy apologized and Zoro took the opportunity to retire to the guest room where he had been sleeping for some time. But not without getting a can of beer from the fridge first, which he held against his cheek as he walked down the hall to the guest room. When the door behind him fell into the lock, he threw himself on the bed and opened the lock with his fingernails. He cursed as he tried to drink from the can while lying down and some beer ran down his shirt. Damn, how could anyone be so stupid? he went into the hall and into the bathroom with the can in his hand to wash off the sticky liquid and rub the stain out with a cloth. He could only hope that the day got better. Even when the doorbell rang, he kept scrubbing at his shirt. Law or Luffy would certainly open the door.  
"I'm sorry to disturb you, but I don't know where else to go..." he heard Vivi through the door and left the bathroom to see what was going on. She was not alone, she had the little girl with her. Just what he needed. What was she doing here? He knew from Luffy that she was now living with the cook and that Vivi was taking care of the girl while Sanji was working. So, what was she doing here? And why did she seem so upset? Zoro watched as Law led Vivi into the living room with her arm, and shortly afterwards he heard Luffy's euphoric screams when he saw Sessa.  
"Look, Zoro, Sessa's here!" Luffy cried enthusiastically and trotted on all fours with Sessa on his back into the living room.  
When Law spotted Zoro, he asked him to make tea for everyone and led Vivi to the couch where they were seated while Luffy dropped down on his stomach in front of the TV to continue watching his favorite show with Sessa. He didn't protest when Law turned down the sound, the pictures were enough for him as he knew each episode by heart and briefly explained the plot and characters to Sessa.  
"What happened?" Law asked Law frankly and Vivi looked down at her trembling hands.  
"It's about Kohza. His unit was attacked, but no one knows how many wounded or dead... Vivi sobbed and her whole body shook as tears streamed down her face.  
"You can't even tell me if he's... if he's among the dead or the living because after the last attack there's such chaos in the area that it's hard to get a view, at least from here..."  
"What do you want to do? Travel there?" Zoro asked, although this question was superfluous, he knew Vivi too well for that. The uncertainty would not leave her alone, but he also knew that this area was dangerous. He considered how much vacation he could take and was already checking possible flights on his cell phone when Vivi announced that she could fly into the area in a few hours if she wanted to. Zoro knew that the plane was her father's private plane and that through his work as a diplomat he had contacts everywhere and would help Vivi find her husband. Nevertheless, he wanted to travel with her to protect her, but Vivi only shook her head.  
"No Zoro, you must work. Besides, you're needed here more," Vivi said, looking over at Sessa and Luffy who assured her that she had nothing to worry about.  
"Law, Zoro and I are already looking after Sessa while you are away. What do you think of that, Sessa? We could watch all the seasons of Germa 66 together!"  
Zoro rolled his eyes during the performance. He wouldn't survive that at all, and he gave Law a pleading look, but the surgeon shrugged his shoulders and said that they probably had no other choice. Relieved, Vivi wrapped her arms around Law's neck and hugged him effusively.  
"Thank you! Then I just must tell Sanji. I feel guilty about having to abandon him with Sessa. But I hope to be back soon. With Kohza."  
When Zoro heard Sanji's name, he realized that he would not only have to deal with Sessa every day but would inevitably run into the cook and he did not like it at all. Maybe he should move back to Ussop's place or even better, to a hotel. But every hotel around here was expensive. But that was still better than listening to his buddy doing it with his new girlfriend, whom he had met through a dating app. Zoro hadn't met her yet, but she had to be something very special if she had managed to knock Ussop out like that, because he was really talking about nothing else. Maybe he could stay with a work colleague? he thought and left the living room to return to the guest room. Without further ado he threw the few belongings he had into his bag and didn't even look up when Luffy marched into the room.  
"Vivi has to leave, don't you want to say goodbye to her?" he asked and looked confusedly at the bag in Zoro's hand.  
"Do you want to leave?"  
"Can't you see?"  
"Is it because of Sessa? Or... because of Sanji?"  
"Does it matter?  
"You're both acting like children!  
"Oh, you are one to talk. Who watches children's programs all day?  
"Germa 66 is not a children's program! And they're so cool, even Sessa thinks so. Didn't you notice how she looked when she saw Stealth Black in action? I've never seen her so excited."  
"That's what I said, kids' show!"  
"Quiet!!! I'm trying to fuckin' sleep!" rumbled Law, who had retreated into the bedroom, and they both continued to speak quietly.  
"Listen, Luffy, I understand you're upset about the cook and me. We'll talk again sometime, but not right now, OK? The breakup's too recent."  
"Okay, but I'm not gonna watch this for a long time. "Now get the hell out of here. Or are you hiding from Sessa?"  
"Don't be silly, why would I hide from a child?"  
"Then you can come out" Luffy said, dragging Zoro by the hand. What do you think, should we try teaching Sessa how to play poker? Maybe she's as good as Nami was!”


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again,
> 
> I´m very sorry for the delay, but I was very busy and all the stress affected my writing unfortunately.  
> Thank you very much for your kudos and thanks to sooozyj for your comment!  
> Since I am on vacation starting tomorrow, the next chapter will not be available for 4 weeks.  
> But I will make up for it, when I return.  
> Have a nice summer and I hope you enjoy this chapter!

His head thundered as if someone was drumming against his forehead with a jackhammer as he drove up the wide, wet street to Laws and Luffy's apartment and parked at the end of the street. He was lucky because parking was scarce around here, especially at this time of day. Sanji took one last puff of his cigarette and finally pressed it into his ashtray before heading out into the pouring rain that was ruthlessly pelting down on him. Fortunately, he always had an umbrella with him which he opened immediately as he crossed the street to get to the modern, 5-story building where his friends lived. He still could not believe that Vivi had left his daughter with Luffy of all people and therefore with Zoro, although he could understand that she would rather be with her husband yesterday than tomorrow, wherever he might be. If she found him alive. But he did not like the fact that she was flying alone, after all it was dangerous there for a woman, but unfortunately, he could not accompany her because of Sessa. Hopefully, his little girl had a better day than he had, he thought and hurried to the building. At least he would not run into Zoro as he was already working. The moss head was the last one he wanted to see. When he had reached the last floor and was finally standing in front of his friends' apartment he rang the bell and soon heavy steps approached, which could by no means have come from Law or Luffy, both were too light and narrow for that. Did they have visitors? With a jerk the door opened, and two dark eyes sparkled at him. Oh great, he was home. Sanji looked at his ex's face and noticed the big cheek that adorned his otherwise striking, attractive face.   
The green-haired didn't even bother to greet him, just called Luffy across the hall to let him know that Sanji was there and didn't move, either because he wouldn't let him in or because he wanted to keep staring at him, hoping he would disappear into thin air. Sanji wanted to do him a favour because the whole situation was getting stranger, almost unpleasant, but he didn't want to give in to this little star contest with Zoro who was interrupted when Luffy appeared with Sessa on his shoulders behind the green-haired.  
"Hey Sanji!" he greeted cheerfully as always and grinned from ear to ear at the sight of his two friends. "Man, I'm glad we're all together again! We have to celebrate, come in Sanji, you look like you could use a drink." He was not even wrong with that, but Sanji refused, because he still had to drive, and he did not believe that the alcohol would help him with his headache. But Luffy did not want to know anything about it and dragged Sanji into the apartment and through the hallway into the living room.  
"Luffy, I can't stay, Sessa has to go to bed, and I'm really tired and I have a really bad headache."  
"I'm sure Law has something for your headaches, and you won't have to stay long, I promise. Come sit down, I'll just have a quick look at what we have in our medicine cabinet," he shouted over his shoulder and disappeared again with Sessa. Exhausted and beaten, Sanji let himself fall into the armchair and put his head back into the neck. Since he neither saw nor heard the moss head, he had probably moved into the guest room, which he was quite happy about, because he was much too tired to argue with him. He was more surprised when Zoro suddenly sat down on the couch, arms crossed over his chest and still looked at him with that sinister look that reminded him of that boy from the film The Omen. Slowly, he began to get on his nerves with his gawking.  
"What do you want, huh?"  
"Your fatherhood suits you well, you look like the blooming life," Zoro remarked sarcastically and grinned draconically, whereupon Sanji jumped up angrily despite his headache. After all the trouble he had had with some guests and colleagues he had had, a lot of anger had built up inside him, which was intensified by his tiredness, and he went for the mosshead.  
"What do you care?! Honestly, I am tired of feeling guilty for what I did because I cannot undo it. And even if I could, I would not want to because I am glad, I have Sessa. Honestly, I don't know what possessed me to give up that experience!"  
Admittedly this side blow was mean, but when he heard Zoro grind his teeth and saw his fingers clawing his upper arms, he felt satisfaction for all the grief and pain he had experienced because of their separation. Yes, he had made a mistake, but who was perfect? Not Zoro. But did he have no right to be happy because of this one mistake? Maybe it was better to put Zoro behind him for good, maybe even start a new life with someone else. At the moment, however, it was out of the question, because he wanted to take care of Sessa and enjoy the time he spent with her to the fullest and therefore wouldn't let anything or anyone spoil his happiness with her, especially not his ex-boyfriend. In the eyes of the mooshead Sanji saw anger, disappointment and reproaches and was therefore not surprised when Zoro pushed him angrily with his hands into the armchair and almost ran over Luffy who just returned with Sessa and looked at Zoro in surprise. 

With a loud bang Zoro threw the door of the guest room behind him and drummed angrily against the door with his right fist two or three times. He should have known back then when the cook had told him about his countless ex-girlfriends and that before him, he had only had affairs with three men, but that these relationships were more like short affairs until he finally met Zoro. And yet he had trusted him, had given him his heart, that he was now trampling him underfoot by telling him that he was happy to have Sessa and thus indirectly condoned the fling, without considering how much it hurt him. Of course, anger and the desire to hurt him also spoke from him, but he only had to look at the cook and the little girl to see who the blonde really needed in life and hit his thighs with his fists to prevent him from destroying anything in the room. He had really tried to forget the whole thing, tried to forgive the cook and Nami, but every time he saw Sessa, his anger about the betrayal of the two formerly most important people in his life boiled up again, as did his anger at Nami, who had just left and he only saw red. Exhausted, he let himself sink to the floor at the door and wrapped his arms around his bent knees as tightly as he could and pressed his face against his legs which started to tremble from the strong embrace. He was aware that it could not go on like this, that sooner or later this anger and sadness would eat him up inside, but he did not know what to do. Even martial arts helped him only temporarily to calm down his rage, which during the last training almost injured one of his students, seriously, if not another student had intervened. Zoro was lucky that Johnny did not want to report him to his employer and after a few beers he had calmed down enough for Zoro to apologize to him. He had even told him about his problems with Sanji and his fatherhood, although he had no idea why he had done so. Probably because he wanted to confide in someone to get everything off his chest, someone who did not belong to his and Sanji's circle of friends. Nor was his name Bartolomeo. He liked his old friend, but he also knew that he had to be careful with Bartolomeo, that he did not get his hopes up and that he would have to hurt him in the end. Luckily for Johnny, things were different, he was cool and had listened to him without judging him or trying to give him advice or force him to return to the cook. Maybe he should call him and ask him if he wanted to go for a drink and talk, he thought about it and lifted his butt to pull his mobile phone out of his back pocket to dial Johnny's number.

After his fight with Zoro, Sessa seemed a bit frightened, probably because the noise had been heard all the way to the bathroom, as Law had also stormed into the living room after Zoro had angrily rushed away, to remind Sanji that he wanted to sleep and threatened to lock the two of them back in their closet if they continued to argue. Sanji apologized, because he wanted to keep on delivering Sessa to him, at least as long as he didn't have a kindergarten place for Sessa, and tried to take Luffy away from Sessa so he could finally leave this place with her and put this horrible day behind him. But Sessa would not let go of Luffy. Only when Luffy tickled her did she let go and he could put her down. Sanji felt the sting of jealousy again when he saw the two of them. He knew that neither of them wanted to hurt him consciously, yet he felt superfluous, almost invisible, in Luffy's presence, because as soon as the black-haired man appeared, she only had eyes for him, because his own relationship with his daughter wasn't really making progress. If this went on, she would probably say daddy to Luffy at some point and not to him. If she ever said more than mom. Luffy apologized because he wanted to give Sanji something else and disappeared into the living room, only to return not a second later with a DVD case he was holding out on him. When Sanji saw the cover, he frowned.   
"What am I supposed to do with this crap? You know I don't like those shows."  
"But Sessa loves it. We watched it all day today because she wanted to keep watching. Especially Stealth Black is her absolute favorite character. I can understand her, he's so cool." Sanji angrily clenched his hands into fists. If Sessa was not with him, he would hit Luffy with the DVD case.  
"I will never let her see such bullshit" said Sanji with a bright red head and watched in amazement as Sessa took the DVD out of Luffy's hand and hid it under her stuffed dog.   
"Well, you've obviously been outvoted, Sanji!" said Luffy and laughed resoundingly.  
Sanji's head looked as if it was going to explode at any moment and Luffy heard him grind his teeth before gently pushing Sessa out the door. Even on the way home he was still angry about Luffy's idea with the DVD. There were dozens of series, so why Germa 66 of all things? He was still embarrassed when someone talked about his old youthful sin and he was annoyed that he had gone to that casting to buy the car he was dreaming of at that time. At that time he had thought that it was a casting for a film, but he hadn't read the contract properly and signed a two-year contract for at least two seasons, which was extended by three more seasons after the great success, before Sanji didn't feel like playing anymore, since he had bought the car of his dreams with the money he had received. He even drove it today. One of the conditions for his participation in this series was that his real name or face was never shown and out of shame he had never mentioned to anyone that he had once played in the series, except Zoro. Even today he blushed with shame when he thought about how he and Zoro had tried to roleplay for Zoro's birthday and Sanji had his old costume sewn on to surprise Zoro. Apparently, he had discovered Zoro's fetish for leather and costumes, because before Sanji could even say anything, Zoro had pushed him on the bed and rubbed himself on him until he was hard enough to fuck him.  
The mere thought of it again caused Sanji to feel that now so familiar stab in the chest and he rubbed his fingers over his tired eyes to concentrate better on the road. Through the rearview mirror he saw that Sessa had fallen asleep and his heart melted at the sight of her peaceful, relaxed features that still had something of a baby in them. As did the sight before his eyes and he wiped the tears from his face. At home, he immediately put Sessa in her bed and took the DVD from her, which he would hide from her for the next few days until he would give it back to Luffy. It was out of the question for her to watch her father's embarrassing acting attempts and vowed never to tell her who was behind the Stealth Black Mask, because there were so many better role models than action heroes, real heroes. Everyday heroes. She should rather admire the policemen who risked their lives every day to protect the population or firefighters who bravely burst into the flames to put out fires. Or simply her father, who tried as best he could, trying to fill the gap left by her mother, who was willing to give her all his love if she would only allow him to. With his last ounce of strength, he went outside to the mailbox to get the mail. Most of it was the usual bills, as always, and a white blank envelope that seemed to have been dropped in his mailbox by someone himself.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again!
> 
> I´m sorry for the wait. Finally it´s here. I had great holidays and I feel ready for the things to come. To make up for the time, I will upload the next four chapter on a weekly basis, before I return to my former schedule. Thank you to sooozyj for your kind comment.  
> And now enjoy and see you soon!

After yesterday's events, Sanji was spending the night tossing and turning restlessly and woke up tired and limp, barely able to keep his eyes open. His gaze glided to his nightstand where the cause of his restless night lay: the white, unmarked envelope he had found in his mailbox last night. Without even suspecting its content, he had opened it and found a short-handwritten note from Nami inside. At least that is what the author of the letter claimed. But that could not be, because Nami was dead and buried, so who had written the letter? And above all, what did this strange note mean?   
Slowly Sanji stretched out his hand and took the envelope with the letter to read it again. Maybe he had become a bit smarter about it by now. Last night he had read it so often that he knew the content by heart by now.

My dear little Sessa,  
tell Daddy to give Mommy back the money he took. Mommy needs it bad. He should put it in a locker and put the key and the address of the locker in an envelope on my grave one week from Friday evening. I love you, Mommy.

Sanji shook his head. Nami could not have written the letter, that much was certain for him. But who else but him, Zoro and the notary could know about the money? Only their friends, though he could not imagine that one of them would tell anyone about his inheritance, especially not a stranger. But where else would the letter writer get the information? From the notary? Not likely. But what he knew was that there was no way he was going to give up the money. It was meant for Sessa. And even if he wanted to, he could not give the money away, because it was in a trust fund from which he could only take money if he wanted to buy something for Sessa. And throwing the money down a stranger's throat was certainly not one of them. Maybe he should give the letter to Corby so he could run the fingerprints through his computer or give him some advice what to do. But first he wanted to call the restaurant and let them know that he did not show up for work today, even though he probably got in trouble with the old man for that. At least this was still better than falling asleep and accidentally burning down the kitchen. As expected, the old geezer was not thrilled that he was taking time off but accepted it if Sanji showed up at the restaurant with Sessa at lunchtime. Sanji promised to stop by and then shuffled into the bathroom to take a shower. The ice-cold water did him good and he slowly became awake.

Less than fifteen minutes later he was ready and left the bathroom with a towel around his hips. The water pearled over his naked upper body, leaving small drops on his mobile phone display that reflected his hesitant expression. He didn't really feel comfortable calling him, but on the other hand... maybe he could think of someone who might be behind the mysterious letter, he thought while wiping his thumb across the display, until finally Zoro's profile picture was looking at him. All too well, he remembered last night and the fight he'd had with the green-haired man, and frustrated, he threw the mobile phone on the bed and untied the knot of the towel that slowly slipped to the floor as he walked over to the wardrobe.  
Angrily he put on dark grey pants and it took him two attempts to get the buttons of his white shirt through the right holes, which frustrated him even more as it reminded him of Zoro who also had trouble with it when he was upset and Sanji stomped out of the bedroom. Even if he called Luffy, he would not want to talk to him, let alone listen to him, so he might as well save himself the phone call. As he stood in front of the kitchen door, he stopped and walked down the hallway until he finally stood in front of his former office that he had converted into a Sessa´s room. Carefully he peered into the room and, as so often lately, he saw Sessa lying on the floor, arms and legs pressed very tightly against her body, as if she were still in her mother's womb. Obviously she hadn't got used to her crib yet and although he brought her to bed every night and read her something from a fairy tale book until she fell asleep, he still found her lying on the floor every morning and wondered if it had something to do with the fact that her mother had died in a bed or if she was still secretly wandering around the room at night when he slept, looking for Nami without him noticing. Even though he knew that he had to be patient with Sessa, he felt that her therapy was making little progress and he began to wonder if she would ever lead a normal life after all she had experienced and slowly but surely doubted that she would be suitable as a father for Sessa.

Sighing, he walked towards the little body and tried to lift her carefully from her squatting position to put her to bed, when she suddenly opened her eyes and looked up at him. Immediately he pulled his hands away and gave her a cautious smile.  
"Good morning, Sessa. I did not want to wake you. Are you hungry?" Sanji asked quietly and got down on all fours, just like Luffy did when they played horsey, but Sessa didn't answer, but got up and left the room without paying attention to him or even exchanging a word with him and he wondered once again what was wrong with him and most of all what he did wrong, that he couldn't find a right connection to his daughter. There should be an invisible bond of love and mutual trust between all parents and their children that connected them, shouldn't there? Even Marco and Ace's adopted son, was so infatuated with his adoptive parents that he followed them everywhere like a little puppy and never got tired of cuddling and playing with them when Sanji visited them, so why was it so difficult for Sessa to build up a relationship with her biological father? Why couldn't she be as happy in his presence as she was in Luffy's presence? Did she like the black-haired man so much more than her own father? He knew that Luffy would never come between him and Sessa and he was happy that she had such a great time with him and how positive Luffy´s influence was, how obviously good she felt around him, but that was exactly the problem, because he envied Luffy for his ability to make friends with others immediately and he just couldn't suppress the jealousy he felt when he saw him and Sessa together and decided to take a vacation to spend more time with her in order to build a deeper bond with her.   
He decided to have a French breakfast today, consisting of homemade croissants, brioches and cocoa. Frightened, Sanji almost dropped the hot baking tray when the phone rang reminding him that he had forgotten to inform Luffy that he would not bring Sessa to him today. His friend was beside himself with joy and immediately suggested to spend the day together.

"Normally I would really like to, but today I would rather spend the day alone with Sessa," he tried to cancel his friend as carefully as possible, but Luffy understood and made Sanji promise that they would do something together another time, without Zoro, as Sanji emphasized.  
"That won't be a problem, he's been hanging out with this Johnny a lot lately anyway," Luffy said and complained to Sanji about his friend's behaviour, who obviously preferred a guy he hardly knew over him. But Sanji did not want to hear about it and said goodbye because he did not want to hear that his ex was already seeing other guys. If he should do what he wanted, they were not together anymore. Still, it hurt to know how quickly he had apparently gotten over him. Probably this Johnny was just a stopgap, someone who helped him get over the break-up. But this didn't change the fact that it hurt because even though their relationship was over, he unfortunately couldn't say the same about his feelings and that annoyed him the most and ruined his whole day because he couldn't think of anything else and was accordingly uncontrollable and irritable when he left the house with her after breakfast to go shopping and noticed that the neighbour's children and some other neighbours were having a little yard sale on this sunny Saturday morning to get rid of their old stuff. As best he could, he tried to maneuver his daughter to the car, but Sessa seemed to have decided to take a closer look and ran straight to the first booth. Sanji called after her and tried to catch up with her, because he did not feel like small talk with the neighbours today, especially since he hardly knew most of them. The stand Sessa had aimed at belonged to two boys, who were about 16, who had spread their belongings on a plaid blanket on which all kinds of things were lying, especially action figures.

"Hi boys" he greeted the two brunette teenagers and could not hide his disgust when Sessa discovered a figure under all the junk, which she immediately pressed against her chast as if it was her favourite doll. He would have thought the two boys had better taste. Why of all things did they have to own a Stealth Black Action figure? And a tasteless one at that? He hated these things and was deeply ashamed of them, because he looked ridiculous as an action figure, but the sale of merchandise articles had been part of it at that time and therefore he could not do anything about it. So, he was all the more relieved when these things gradually disappeared from the shops after the production of the series had been stopped and fortunately, he hadn't seen any of them since then, at least until today.  
With an annoyed eye roll he tried to take the figure from Sessa's hand, but no matter how hard he pulled, she just would not let go. The two boys watched the wild struggle for the figure that Sanji finally won much to the sorrow of his daughter who immediately burst into tears. Shamefaced, Sanji turned his head away and, as he walked away, threw the figure on the blanket and dragged his unruly daughter behind him, who rebelled against him with all her might, squatting down and refusing to take even one step. He had the feeling that he was being watched by the whole neighbourhood and wanted to run away, but his daughter had broken away and let herself fall to the floor with folded arms.  
All pleading did not help, she did not want to move and sobbed softly to herself. Sanji was unsure and did not know what to do. He had never seen her so stubborn, although Sessa's stubbornness did not amaze him, after all, he could be stubborn himself. However, he was too tired to discuss, so he resorted to the only solution. Screaming and kicking, Sessa tried to free herself but Sanji held her tightly and hurried to the car as fast as he could. He already felt a bit bad when he finally drove away and looked through the rear-view mirror into his daughter's face, staring reproachfully at him from tear-stained eyes. It was the first time that he had to disappoint her, but that was part of it. As a parent you could not always be the good one and you had to be strict sometimes. He could only hope that she would not stay angry with him for too long.  
When he and Sessa arrived at the Baratié shortly before noon, they were eagerly awaited. When Zeff saw his granddaughter, he dropped everything and beamed all over his face.  
Carefully he crouched down in front of her to talk to her at eye level, in a soft voice, but avoided any physical contact as Sanji had told him that she didn't like to be touched.   
"Who do we have here? You are a pretty girl," he said admiringly and gave her a friendly smile.   
"I am Zeff, your grandfather. I'm your daddy's daddy."  
Immediately, Sanji gave him an evil look to remind him that they had actually agreed that he wouldn't tell her who he was but the old geezer had his own mind about that and didn't let anyone tell him anything. Unfortunately. Sessa had calmed down in the meantime since her tantrum and was calm and closed again as usual.  
Zeff, however, did not miss the tear-stained eyes and the little red spots on her face that still showed her excitement and which Zeff knew only too well because Sanji also tended to blush when he got very upset and his eyes narrowed when he looked up at his adopted son.   
"What happened?"  
Sanji rolled his eyes in annoyance and crossed his arms defensively to signal how little he wanted to talk about it. But he did not have to, because the guilt was written all over his face.

"Nothing, just the usual difficulties between parents and children. But do not worry, I did not hurt her, if that's what you're getting at..."  
"Of course not, I know you would never raise your hand against her. After all, that is not the way I raised you. I'm just worried," Zeff said, pointing his head at Sessa and following him into the restaurant area where the first lunch guests were already dining. Sanji followed them at a distance and let his eyes wander through the restaurant where there were many beautiful women today and smiled at each one of them as they passed. Women were in so many ways more pleasant and enjoyable than the green haired was, especially less strenuous and the sight of all these women made him forget, at least for a moment, his grief and especially the mysterious letter. With all the angels surrounding him, he almost overlooked his friend Ussop, who was gesticulating wildly with his arms to draw attention to himself, if he was not accompanied by a woman with long hair and blue eyes, who sat next to him and magically drew the cook to her table.   
"Now I understand why I hardly get to see you anymore. You had understated in your stories, though," Sanji rebuked him teasingly and, without being asked, grabbed the hand of the dark beauty to breathe a gentle kiss on the back of her hand before he introduced himself to her in a smoky, sexy voice in his native language which he fell into when he flirted.  
„Je suis impressionné par sa beauté, Madame. Puis-je me présenter? Je m'appelle Sanji, le sous-chef de cet établissement et je vous emmènerai au paradis culinaire si vous me le permettez. Même la plus belle rose n'oserait pas s'épanouir et se faner avec envie en sa présence.”  
"You're right, he's very charming, even if I didn't understand everything. Unfortunately, my French is a bit rusty," the dark-haired beauty admitted and turned smiling to Ussop, who didn't know how to deal with the blond's flirtation. Sanji didn't intend anything serious with that, but he still found it a bit irritating that he openly flirted with his girlfriend in front of him and felt insecure, because his friend knew how to attract attention, especially from women, and how to win them over with his charm, while he himself seemed to vanish into thin air in front of his own girlfriend. At least he hoped she was his girlfriend, they hadn't talked about their relationship status yet, but if he had his way, they were together, at least he hadn't had such butterflies in his stomach for a long time as he had with her.   
"Excuse me, how rude of me. But when I see a beautiful woman, I get into raptures and forget in which language I speak" Sanji apologized and asked if they had already ordered. When the stranger who introduced herself as Robin told him her order, he congratulated her on her excellent choice and apologized when he remembered that he was here with Sessa.

"If you're here to eat anyway, why don't you join us?" Ussop suffested and the dark-haired beauty nodded. Sanji fetched Sessa and sat down at the table with them. In the meantime, Zeff had even gotten a highchair in which Sanji put her before he sat down himself. Somehow it was unusual for him to be served so he offered his foster father to follow him into the kitchen and help with the preparation but Zeff refused and ordered him to sit and take care of his daughter and friends. Sighing, but also a bit angry with his old man, Sanji finally sat down and asked Robin about everything, including the story of how she had met Ussop. Patiently, she answered almost all questions except for a few, which she cleverly avoided by asking counter-questions. Her eyelids dropped and her voice sounded regretful.  
"Ussop told me what happened. It can't be easy to be both father and mother..." she said and her eyes returned to Sanji who was busy pouring some water into his daughter's drinking cup which he always carried with him when they were out and about, before pouring himself a glass of water, although he felt more like wine given the subject.  
“Indeed," he admitted, waving the content of his glass back and forth. He did not know whether he should tell Ussop about the letter. But in the end, the need to talk to someone about it prevailed, especially since he had no one to talk to. Even though he enjoyed the time with his daughter, he missed going out and just talking to his friends or even doing something. Even though the letter sounded harmless at first sight, the content worried him, and he decided to tell them about Nami's supposed message, even though he did not know Robin. But if Ussop liked her, she could not be a bad person under any circumstances.  
Ussop agreed with Sanji that it could not have been Nami at all and he affirmed that he had not told anyone about the money.  
"What did Nami do for a living?" Robin asked. Sanji thought about it a moment before he answered.  
"As far as I remember, she was an accountant at an import and export company. I do not know more than that because she always kept it a big secret. But she must have earned very well otherwise she would never have been able to afford this 200 square meter apartment with the roof terrace and all these expensive clothes, journeys abroad and furniture. Nami has always loved luxury and worked extremely hard for it. Nevertheless, I was surprised that she was able to save so much despite her extravagant lifestyle. Maybe in the two years she was gone, she found an even better paid job," Sanji speculated.  
"Maybe a former work colleague is behind the letter, trying to get the money that way," Robin continued the story, turning her head when the waiter came with the food.   
"Maybe, but somehow I don't really believe it," Sanji said and at the sight of the delicious food, Sanji's and Ussop's stomachs responded simultaneously when they saw the lovingly prepared food. At least until Sanji saw his friend's order. Sanji turned up his nose in disapproval when he saw the cheeseburger and fries on Ussop's plate.   
"You can order anything you want here and choose fast food? You can get it on every corner!"  
"But it doesn't taste as good as in the Baratié", Ussop answered and bit with relish into his burger. He had a point there, but there were so many healthier and tastier food, but Luffy and Ussop talked against walls. Sanji started to carefully bone his fish and then eat it while thinking about Robin's theory. It was a possibility, but he had a hard time insinuating anything to a woman. His unshakable faith in the female sex had already led him to several arguments with Zoro, who could not understand his naive way about women, and Sanji had always felt compelled to defend the opposite sex against his partner's insinuations. Or ex-partner to be precise. Sanji drank his glass in one go and was annoyed that this greenhead had crept back into his thoughts. Angrily, Sanji stuffed one piece of fish after the other into his mouth and after Sessa had finished eating, too, he promised to show the letter to Corby.

"You two must come and visit me at the next opportunity. I will cook for you, too. Whatever your heart desires," Sanji said and gave Robin a kiss on the back of his hand as a farewell gesture before he finally left with Sessa for the kitchen to say goodbye to her grandpa. But the old fart was so stressed that he could only wave to them and promised to take Sessa to the zoo on his next free weekend. Sanji nodded and wanted to leave the restaurant through the back exit as Zeff called after him and to his surprise even followed him outside. Surprised, Sanji turned around.  
"Look, if you want to spend some time just with your daughter, then... take it. We can do without you for a while." Though he looked grim, Sanji could clearly hear the concern in his voice. He had to look like shit if even his foster father did not miss it and he accepted the offer with a silent nod. Jeff knelt to his granddaughter and when his finger touched the tip of her nose she did not even flinch as it was only a short touch.   
"Look after him for me, will you? Because sometimes he doesn't know when he's gonna reach his limit."  
Sanji denied any comment in Sessa's presence and limited his budding rage to a jaw grinding, loud enough for Zeff to hear, but not enough for his adopted son's anger to worry him. "Don't catch cold," he shouted in his farewell cry before Sanji roared off in the car. No sooner were they back in the car than the oppressive silence reigned again and Sanji's gaze kept rushing to the rear-view mirror. Her look told him that she was still angry with him and he wondered if he had not been too hard on her. After all, she could not help it that this part of his past embarrassed him, and he wanted to forget it. Should he ask the neighbour's boy if they still had that ugly caricature of himself? Or should he rather come up with something else to get her to forgive him? But what? Sanji thought about it the whole way through and when they finally drove up the driveway to the house, Sanji led Sessa into her room and set the baby monitor and walked up the stairs to the bedroom. Sighing, his head sank between his shoulders when he saw the black leather outfit that he still had not thrown away even after all these years. He had worn it only once for the moss head and swore he would never put it on again, but now he struggled to decide whether he should wear it again, one last time, just to please his daughter and to see her shining face when she saw her hero.

He was a bit proud that it still fit since the last time he had put it on for Zoro, but he still felt queasy in his stomach as he walked down the steps to her room. It had cost him a whole bottle of hairspray to get the hair to look like on TV, but he was quite happy with the result. His heart resembled a steam locomotive as he pushed open the door and Sessa, sitting on the floor with her stuffed dog, looked over at him. Her eyes fixed him, and his feet felt like lead, unable to move as she stared at him with her big, fawn-brown eyes. Sanji tried to interpret her gaze, which patterned him motionlessly, praying that she would finally say something or at least show some reaction, but nothing happened and Sanji suddenly felt like he was at the casting when he applied for a role in Germa 66. He even stuttered, it had just been too long, and he had the feeling that he had forgotten everything. Or maybe it was simply because he couldn't screw up if he wanted to make up for his mistake.  
Sanji began wildly waving his arms in the air until he finally bent his left knee slightly while keeping his right leg stretched out and his arms pointing up to the right, holding the palm of his left hand outstretched while holding his index and middle fingers like a pistol and squeezing the remaining fingers together on his palm. His chest rose and fell frantically while he waited for the verdict of his daughter, who at least watched him excitedly, and when he finally finished, her eyes began to shine. On her little feet she tripped over the carpet towards him. Sanji looked down on himself in disbelief. To confirm to himself that he was not dreaming, he carefully reached out his hand and swallowed as he touched the soft, red-blonde hair. He wasn´t dreaming, he could clearly feel her little arms clasping his leg tightly. He was so overwhelmed by the result that he did not know whether to worry that Sessa preferred a fictional character to him or whether he should just enjoy the moment. In the end it did not matter because it was a beginning and he hoped to have finally made a breakthrough and found a way to build a bond with Sessa.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised here´s the next chapter.   
> Thank you so much for the kudos and a special thank you to sooozyj for your kind and encouraging words! I´m very happy that you love the story!  
> See you all next week!

"I'm not handing over this restaurant. And I will not kill the old geezer either. He is the geezer who gave up everything for the sake of one little brat. If I cannot even put my life at risk to save him, then I can never repay my dept to him" * said Sanji, closing the chapter of Ussop's manga. At last the eyes of his daughter had closed, who had bravely tried to stay awake to follow the exciting story of the floating restaurant and its struggling cooks. Even though he was a bit embarrassed that the main characters of Ussop's manga were based on his friends, he liked this part of the East Blue Arc best, especially the story of Sanji and Zeff touched him deeply and hit him right in the heart, as he really was deeply indebted to the old man and his wife who had adopted him, although he was already 14. Most couples used to adopt infants or toddlers and not adolescent rebellious teenagers like he had been. But Zeff preferred to give an older boy a chance and when he met Sanji he had somehow seen himself in him and that is why he and his wife had decided to adopt him. The first months hadn't been easy and he had left no stone unturned to make life as hard as possible for both of them so that they would get tired of him and would return him like everyone else had done with him before them. But the old man was even more stubborn than himself and his wife was the most patient woman Sanji had ever met and finally they managed to get through to him and proved to him that their intentions and feelings for him were honest and Sanji finally opened his heart. Unfortunately, he was only allowed a short time with his adoptive mother, but her death had brought him and Zeff even closer, even though neither of them would ever say this fact out loud to the other. 

Shaking his head, Sanji rose from the edge of the bed where he had just been sitting and turned on the small night lamp on Sessa's night stand before sneaking out of her room to return to his friends who were sitting in the living room and chatting. Originally he had only wanted to invite Ussop and Robin for dinner, but then he had thought that it would be much more entertaining and fun if he invited the others too, so that they could get to know Robin as well. Unfortunately, only Luffy, Chopper, Franky, Law, Ussop and Robin had time, but he was not too sad about that, because they wouldn't have had enough space on the couch anyway and they didn't have enough chairs. Sanji smiled when he found Robin sitting on the couch with Ussop's arms tightly wrapped around him on his lap. Even though the sight of couples still gave him a little sting in his chest every now and then, he was happy for the two of them and sat down on a chair and apologized that they had to wait so long for him.  
"Oh, never mind. With my stories even the most tired child cannot sleep," Ussop said proudly and Sanji asked him how he knew what he had read.  
His friends looked at each other smiling and Robin answered vicariously for all of them that his voice could not have been ignored but hurried to add that she thought he was a great reader. Sanji's cheeks glowed both at the compliment and at the fact that everyone had heard him and tried to change the subject.  
"By the way, Vivi contacted me yesterday. Unfortunately, the connection was more than bad, but she sends her love and hopes to return soon."  
Immediately, all the faces in the room lit up and they asked hopefully if she had found Kohza and if he was okay. Sanji said yes to the former, but his condition was critical, so they had put him in an artificial coma to recover better from his serious injuries. For this reason, Vivi could not let him fly home, as he was in no condition to be transported.  
"The main thing is that he gets well quickly," said Luffy, who had just come out of the hallway. Apparently, he had just come out of the bathroom upstairs because he zipped up the zipper of his jeans, even though a lady was present. His friend seemed visibly relieved at the news, but otherwise seemed anything but cheerful and dropped into the armchair diagonally across from Sanji. His dark brown eyes were looking at the blond man and his voice seemed calm but cold as ice when he asked Sanji where the photos of Zoro that used to hang in the corridor upstairs on the first floor had gone.  
"I took them down," Sanji explained calmly, not even twitching when the black-haired man jumped up.  
"And why?! What will Zoro think when he sees you've removed all the pictures of him!"  
Luffy gnashed his teeth loudly. Suddenly the mood was tilted, and all eyes were on Luffy and Sanji who stared furiously at each other. Sanji did not understand what the problem was, after all he had only hung them up and locked them away so he would not have to see them every morning when he walked through the hall. This step hadn't been easy for him because he had clung to the thought for a long time that Zoro might return after all, that he would forgive him and get used to Sessa, but meanwhile he didn't believe in it anymore and had therefore decided to close the subject of Zoro and to move on. As calmly as he could, he tried to make Luffy understand why he had done this, for he feared that Sessa might wake up because of the noise.  
"It's my house, so I can do whatever I want. Besides, they're just pictures."  
"They're memories of Zoro that you just take off, as if you wanted to erase any trace of him!"  
"It may be strange to you because Law is your first boyfriend and you've never broken up, but those things are part of a break-up!"  
"When you first broke up, you didn't remove all the pictures!"  
"I wasn't apart from Zoro for that long either! I know you do not like the idea Luffy, but Zoro and I are not together anymore and we're not going to be. Some things can't be fixed, understand that," Sanji said somewhat louder than intended.  
Luffy shook his head and screamed so loud that probably the neighbours could hear him, maybe even the whole street. Sanji had not seen him so angry in a long time, he was beside himself with rage and something else, Sanji could see that very clearly, he just could not say what this other thing was. 

"Bullshit, you still love each other! How much longer do you need to understand that? You want to wait until you are dead? You're just gonna give up and leave each other?"  
Luffy's eyes shimmered in the light of the ceiling lights and Sanji thought he saw a tiny tear running down his friend's face.  
"I've already lost Nami, I don't want to lose two of my best friends, too! Life's too short to be angry with each other forever!"  
Sanji swallowed. Ruffy had not cried once since the funeral, let alone shown the slightest signs of grief, and he had been wondering when he would finally allow his grief to come up. Ruffy was always so cheerful, so completely positive and optimistic that it seemed bizarre to see him so upset and emotional. Meanwhile he felt sorry for their argument and Sanji tried to limit the damage by raising his arms and slowly walking towards his friend to put his hands on his shoulders.  
"I know, but it's not up to me this time..."  
Luffy avoided his friend's arms, who tried to touch him and shook his head.  
"I'm so tired of your fight. Your breakup has not only affected you. You are dividing the whole group and forcing us to be considerate of you and choose between you two. But I am tired of always having to choose between one of you when I would much rather be with both of you. You are like brothers to me." Luffy wiped his sleeve over his eyes and turned to Law who was sitting next to Franky on the couch and asked him to drive him home. Since Law's next shift was beginning in a couple of hours anyway, and he wanted to get some sleep before he went, he got up without a word and followed Luffy to the door. The others, however, sat there silently, still unable to understand what had just happened. So much for his plan to spend a nice evening with his friends, Sanji thought bitterly. He should have known that Luffy would make a big fuss about the pictures, he himself had also had a bad feeling when he had taken them down, but he just couldn't take them anymore and wanted to banish any memory of Zoro so he wouldn't be constantly reminded of him. When the engine of Law's car sounded outside, Sanji apologized to his friends to smoke outside. 

Since Sessa had moved in, he tried to quit smoking for her sake, but he did not quite succeed and so he allowed himself a small cigarette from time to time, after Sessa fell asleep.  
The nicotine soon did its work and his tense nerves calmed down slowly while he kept his eyes fixed on the cloudy night sky that stretched above him. Luffy was unfortunately right in every word, it was not just about him and Zoro anymore, but about their friends who were torn between them. He was aware that it could not go on like this and that he would have to learn to get along with Zoro at some point, but was it possible to be just friends with the moss head? Would Zoro one day be able to cope with the fact that Nami and he had a child together? Or would they have to meet their friends without each other? For Luffy the situation would be unbearable in any case and he would never accept it, so they had to try to find a way just for his sake.   
Sanji had almost smoked his cigarette when his front door opened, and his friends left the house one by one to say goodbye to Sanji and thank him for the food and the invitation. He could only suppress the tears with difficulty as everyone, but Robin gathered around him and hugged him for a group hug, and he felt bad that he had ruined their evening.  
"What are you talking about, man? Ruffy has to finally understand that it's over between you and Zoro, but with his stubbornness it'll probably take forever," Franky said and gave Sanji an encouraging pat between his shoulder blades. Sanji almost choked on his cigarette. Franky, however, only laughed when he saw his friend's bluish face and advised him to quit smoking when he was getting so bad and indicated Chopper with a nod of his head to follow him to the car. Relieved not to have to take the bus home, he said goodbye to Sanji and ran after his stocky friend. Sanji still looked after the unequal duo and waited until Franky's red Pickup was almost gone before he turned to Ussop and Robin, the only ones left.  
"I'm sorry the evening ended so unpleasantly," Sanji said, but Robin pressed her index finger to his lips to silence him.  
"Don't be, Ussop had already warned me about you and told me about your breakup."  
"I'll make it up to you the next time you come over for dinner. Just the two of you."  
Robin smiled and hugged Sanji goodbye, who could only with the greatest of effort avoid burying his nose in her hair. He loved the discreet, not too obtrusive scent of her hair and quickly pulled away. Ussop had scored an absolute lucky strike and envied him that he had met such a fantastic woman. Maybe he should try online dating if he could meet such incredible women there. Anyway, he had enough of men for the moment. 

*This is an excerpt from chapter 58 of One Piece, in case any of you don't recognize it 😊


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! 
> 
> Things are getting intense so fasten your seatbelt!  
> I apologize in advance and I hope you continue following this story after this chapter.  
> I´m so grateful for all your kudos and my special thanks go to sooozyj for your kind and always encouraging words, which push me forward! 
> 
> See you next week hopefully!

"Good morning" Ussop mumbled, still sleepy and happily snuggled up from behind Robin's soft body, from which a pleasant warmth emanated. He had finally succeeded in getting her to stay with him for a whole night, although she always complained that she did not sleep well in a strange bed. However, his bed was no longer strange for her, as much time as they had already spent together in it. And hopefully would still spend together. Her calm, level-headed and above all uncomplicated manner did him so well and he felt as comfortable and carefree as never before, that he sometimes had to pull himself together not to ask her to move in with him, although he wouldn't mind moving in with her either. Basically, he did not care where they lived if he could be with her. Actually, he had taught himself to take the whole thing slowly and not to get too involved, but his heart had already won over his mind and he had fallen head over heels in love with her, even though Chopper had advised him to be careful, because he knew him only too well and therefore knew how quickly his friend could get caught up in a thing and above all that he could get so caught up in his dreams that he began to believe in her at some point and then liked to suppress reality. But this was not a dream, it felt too good, too real and if he could, he would lie there all day, cuddled up to this beautiful woman. But unfortunately, he had promised his publisher to send him the two missing chapters within two weeks, one week of which was already over, so he was a bit pressed for time.   
Reluctantly, he detached himself from the beautiful woman, but not without giving her a tentative kiss on the tip of her nose after she turned to him.   
"I'll make us breakfast" he announced and finally slipped out of bed. Since he knew Robin, whenever he knew she was coming to him, he had called Sanji to give him cooking advice to improve his poor cooking skills, but unfortunately they never worked out as well as Sanji did, even though Robin supposedly liked it. With a deep sigh he thought of Luffy and Sanji, who had not spoken to each other for a week now. He knew from Sanji that he had tried to talk to Luffy, but the black-haired man had refused to listen to him if he and Zoro did not approach each other. He had even kicked Zoro out less than two days after Luffy and Sanji had quarrelled and told him that he could come back if he and Sanji cleared things.

Since then no one had seen or heard from Zoro. Either he had moved back in with this Bartolomeo or he was sleeping at his new friend's house that Luffy had told him about. It did not matter, after all Zoro was old enough and it was none of their business where he slept.   
When Ussop went to get the box of eggs from the refrigerator, he looked at the crayon drawing of Sessa that she had given him two days ago when he last visited Sanji. He had been so moved by her gesture that he immediately pinned the picture to the refrigerator, although he still did not know exactly what it was supposed to represent. Maybe she was something like the Picasso of the 21st century and her paintings would be worth a fortune one day, he thought and smiled at the idea. It got even wider as he heard footsteps approaching and Robin's scent got into his nose, who suddenly stood next to him and grabbed a mug from the wall cupboard to pour coffee into it.  
Proudly he pointed with his head to the picture because Robin did not know it yet.  
"Cute," she just commented and sipped her coffee with a smile. She was usually never talkative in the morning and therefore limited herself to listening to Ussop.  
"Yes, she is a real artist, because I have no idea what it is supposed to represent" Ussop admitted with a smile and asked how she slept. Robin confessed that she slept quite well and looked at the picture thoughtfully, as if she were studying it thoroughly and trying to grasp the deeper meaning of the picture.   
"If you keep this up, you'll be staring another hole in the picture" Ussop lovingly teased her, but Robin did not seem to listen to him, but circled around him to look at the picture up close. Ussop found her behaviour strange and asked her worried if everything was okay.  
"Sorry, it's just... I don't know, but somewhere I've seen something like this before."  
Ussop laughed and almost dropped the plate with his breakfast, which he was about to carry into the living room. In all the years he had lived here, he had never found it necessary to buy a table and he had never missed one, but since he knew Robin, he was a bit ashamed that they were always forced to put their plates on their laps when they ate. In fact, his apartment, which he had lived in since college and hadn't changed since, seemed rather shabby compared to Robin's modern, expensive furnishings, but he had gotten so used to it that it felt weird if he even threw away the doormat at his door.   
"Surely most children's drawings hardly differ from each other, so it must be because of that," he said and took the second plate to carry it into the living room as well.  
"That is not what I mean. I'm sure I've seen these symbols somewhere before," Robin said in a certain voice and ran her fingers over the picture as if to decipher it.  
Ussop put the plates on the side table in front of the couch and returned to the kitchen to take a closer look at the picture as well, but he could not see anything for the life of him. For him it was and remained a completely normal child's drawing. 

Zoro held up his glass and toasted Johnny to. It was unusually crowded for a Sunday evening, probably because of happy hour, and Zoro had to shout almost hoarse for his friend standing next to him at the bar to understand him.  
"I think it's really nice of you to let me stay with you until I find a place to live."  
Johnny shook Zoro's gratitude with a movement of his hand.   
"Don't mention it. I'm just sorry you have to sleep on the couch though, I know from experience how uncomfortable it is."  
"Oh no, I'm used to worse," Zoro said, remembering all too well the back pain he had had when Luffy and Ace found him on the park bench. Or that cold basement floor and Zoro shivered at the thought. Hurriedly he took a big sip and patted Johnny on the back in comradeship, whereupon he snorted loudly because he choked on his beer. Zoro apologized and watched anxiously as Johnny coughed, shooting beer from his mouth and nose, and patted him on the back, this time more gently.  
"There he goes again" he gasped and dabbed his shirt and pants with a paper napkin.  
"I'm really sorry, man. I am just so grateful that you took me in. After all, we hardly know each other."  
"As long as you walk around the house with your shirt off every now and then, I'm happy”, Johnny joked, but Zoro realized something was wrong.  
"Listen, if there is a problem with me living with you, please tell me. I'll find shelter somewhere else," Zoro said, but Johnny raised his arms in reassurance.  
"No, no, everything's fine. Really. Otherwise I would not have offered it to you. But seriously, Zoro. How long do you want to stay with friends until you find your own apartment? You moved out of your ex's house a while ago. It's not like there aren't any apartments available, so what's the problem?"  
Zoro shrugged his shoulders and drank from his glass as he thought about Johnny's question. He did not know himself why he hesitated. Before he had met the cook, he had lived alone for a long time, and lived occasionally with other men, but he had never been able to hold out long enough with one, let alone them with him. But with the cook it had worked surprisingly well, even though they had sometimes argued quite fiercely, and with time Zoro had gotten used to the blonde's company and quirks. So much so that it was somehow difficult for him to live alone now. Even Luffy's lively, high-spirited nature, he was confronted with from morning to night, was still better than the idea of coming into an empty, odourless apartment after work or trying to sleep without the usual, snoring noises he was used to. He was probably afraid of living alone, as much as he hated to admit it to himself. But there was no way he would tell Johnny that, so he just shrugged his shoulders and said that he would soon start looking.  
Johnny kept squinting over his shoulder as if he were watching someone and leaned over to Zoro to whisper in his ear.  
"Do you see the guy behind us sitting at the table to my right? He has been staring over and over to us ever since he came in. I think he has a crush on you."  
Zoro looked at the stranger briefly and shrugged his shoulders in disinterest. But Johnny did not let up and tried to get Zoro to at least invite him for a drink to get to know him.   
"You don't have to become a couple. You can just have fun. Or do you not want to because you show consideration for me? If that is the point, just say the word and I'll be on my way."

"He's not my type," Zoro said and took a sip from his glass.  
"Oh, and what does your type look like? Let me guess: blond, tall, handsome, long legs, chin beard, sexy smile?"  
Now it was Zoro who almost choked and stared at Johnny in disbelief.  
"Oh, come on, it wasn't hard. You still carry his picture in your wallet. Besides, you almost twist your neck every time someone walks past you with that description. I can understand you; I felt the same with Yosaku. There was never anyone after him, and believe me, I tried. But every guy I met, I compared them to Yosaku and if they were not like him, I did not let them get to me in the first place. This frustrated me so much that in addition to his infidelity, I blamed him for my inability to find a new relationship. I got so caught up in my anger that at some point I did not know any other state of mind and chased away anyone who tried to help me. I was so indescribably angry and hurt that at some point I chased away everything and everyone until no one could stand me anymore and I was left alone. Without partner and friends. Only then did I begin to realize that this anger brought me nothing but destroying everything and I decided to forgive him instead. And, to forgive the other person with whom he cheated on me. And when I succeeded, I felt better, I finally found my peace, even if we could not save our relationship because of it. But today we are good friends and he is still the most important person in my life.  
Johnny now looked directly at Zoro as he continued speaking.  
"I know that forgiving is hard, but it's the only way to finally put an end to this misstep for you and maybe get back to a halfway normal relationship with him. Maybe the two of you can even make a new start. I know that you still love him. Do not let your anger destroy you, believe me, once you are in this spiral you will have a hard time finding your way out, maybe never again. The question is not whether you can forgive him, but whether if you want to forgive him. Because only if you are willing to forgive him, will you be able to do so.

Thoughtfully, Zoro turned the glass in his hands and finally drank the rest in one go.  
"I'm tired let's go," Zoro said and passed the money over to the bartender. The stranger who had been watching them the whole time also got up and followed Zoro and Johnny to the parking lot, where he finally took a seat behind the wheel of a black Hummer. The mosshead envied him a bit for the beautiful vehicle while he himself got into his old and dented car. Since they had arrived in his car and Zoro had only drunk one beer, he drove and growled grimly when Johnny adjusted the navigation system so they could find their way home. Of course, the green-haired guy did not like it at all when he adjusted the navigation, but Johnny said he was not sure if he could keep his eyes open until they got home. A glance at the clock on the dashboard told Zoro that it was well past midnight, but at least they would be able to get home without any trouble as the streets were empty.  
The slight rumble of the car and the soft light of the streetlights had a calming effect and Johnny soon closed his eyes.   
Great, now he could watch how he kept himself awake. Zoro lowered the window completely and turned on the radio, just loud enough that Johnny did not wake up. He turned the knob until the song Highway To Hell came out of the speakers. Drumming his fingers on the steering wheel, he began to sing along to keep himself awake, because it took him at least an hour to get to Johnny's apartment. It was still a mystery to him why he had chosen an apartment so far outside the city, but at least it was cheap, which was probably the main reason why he lived there. In the rear-view mirror he saw that the Hummer was following them. Zoro had a bad feeling. It could be a strange coincidence, but what if it weren’t one? What did he want from him? Zoro watched him carefully and saw that he was trying to overtake them. He decided not to let him pass and accelerated, but the Hummer clearly had more horsepower and caught up with them in no time. When he was almost at Zoro's height, he rammed the car right into the side, whereupon the green-haired man lost control of the car and raced across the lane directly towards the crash barrier to his left. In panic, Zoro tried to avoid the crash barrier by pulling the steering wheel around, but slipped on it, overturned several times, and slid across the roadway lying on the roof, where it crashed into the other crash barrier.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again to the new chapter!  
> I´m very happy to have all you wonderful people out there who support me with kudos and comments.My special thanks goes to sooozyj. There are no words to describe the happiness and joy that you all give me and I´m looking forward to next week when the next chapter will be available.  
> Take care of you and see you soon!

"Faster, faster!" Luffy demanded impatiently, jumping up and down on his seat and pulled the seatbelt that held him down with him, struggling to hold on to the excited young man.  
"Luffy calm down! We do not know what happened yet! And above all, stop stepping on my foot all the time. It is already on the gas pedal. I'm going as fast as I can, but if you keep this up, you'll be walking the road to the accident site!"  
Luffy immediately pulled his foot away and crossed his arms in front of his chest, but at least he apologized, albeit quietly. Law could still feel his inner tension and sighed. He could understand his friend. It had been quite a shock for both when they had seen the news about the serious car accident this morning at breakfast as Luffy had immediately recognized Zoro's car. He would have loved to drive off on his own, but Law was able to keep him from getting behind the wheel in his condition. Several times he had tried to reach Sanji, but he just did not answer. Hopefully, he had not heard about the accident through the news. Law had thought about informing the others about Zoro's accident but did not get around to it because Luffy did not want to wait anymore. Besides, they did not know if they even got to the scene of the accident because the news said that the road had been closed off for a long time. They probably would not even let them near the scene of the accident, because the police probably had enough to do with the onlookers, who probably flocked like blowflies around the scene of the accident to get a glimpse of the victim. But they had to do something because Luffy would not stop until he knew what was going on with Zoro. Law did not dare say what was going through his mind when he saw the pictures, because he did not want to worry Luffy anymore, but it did not look good. Nevertheless, he fervently hoped that Zoro had survived the accident, because Luffy would certainly not be able to cope with another death among their friends and it would throw him off track.   
He tried to reach Corby via the hands-free system of his cell phone, but after ringing several times Corby finally picked up the phone. He sounded very stressed, yet he listened patiently to Law and confirmed that he was at the scene of the accident and that they should rather go home, as the police immediately turned away anyone who even came close to the scene of the accident. Even Sanji had understood this, who had left immediately after Corby had informed him and had been driving up and down the surrounding area since then. When Law inquired why he was doing this, it did not escape his notice how Corby hesitated briefly before continuing.  
"We found only one black-haired man in the passenger seat of the car, but he was severely injured and unconscious and therefore could not tell us what happened. We do not know whether Zoro was driving the car, as there is no trace of the driver, but we assume that he was driving because it is his car and we cannot reach him. So, if you want to help, find Sanji and take him home with you. I would have taken care of him, but I must continue the investigation. Besides, Sanji just did not want to leave, he preferred to look for Zoro, although I assured him that we are doing everything we could.”  
Law assured him that they were looking for Sanji and thanked him for the information before he hung up. The new information they had received sounded worrying. While it wasn't said that Zoro was really the driver of the car, Law also knew that he never let anyone drive his car except Sanji, so he was the only one who could have driven it unless someone had stolen it and the passenger was one of the thieves. But this option was highly unlikely, the car was just too old and not in the best condition for that, but as long as he was still driving, Zoro didn't want to buy a new one because he still had to pay off the mortgage on the house. Luffy was even more excited after the call than he already was and yelled at Law to step on the gas. Law didn't want to risk being stopped by the police for speeding or even getting into an accident themselves because it was raining non-stop, so he told Luffy to calm down and assured him that he would do everything he could to help them find Sanji. Luffy gritted his teeth and kept nervously chewing on his lower lip as he peered out the window looking out for his friend but could barely see anything because of the rain. Ignoring his friend's protests, Luffy drove down the window, loosened his seat belt and bent his upper body out the window.  
"Sanji!!! Where are youuuuuu? Answer!!!!" he yelled against the rain and slapped Law's hand away, which tried to pull him back inside the car.  
"Luffy, calm down, it's no use. You do not know where he is or if he can even hear you. You want to risk the police stopping us?"  
But Luffy did not want to calm down. He told Law to stop immediately so he could go on foot to look for Sanji and Zoro. Since they were not far from the accident site, Law looked for a place to stop. Luckily, most of the commuters who had to go to work in the morning were long gone, so Law could turn his blinker to stop on the hard shoulder and put on the hazard lights so the other drivers knew what to do, and followed Luffy, who had already jumped out of the car and was climbing over the guard rail. 

Law tried to keep up with the black-haired who did not know which direction to go first. The area behind the crash barrier was steep at this point of the road and slippery due to the wet ground, so Law watched Luffy with trepidation as he slipped down the steep slope leading to a small wooded area. Since his clothes were already soaked, he followed Luffy, even though he landed on his butt a few times, and let his eyes wander in the hope of spotting the blond or green-haired one. First and foremost, Zoro had to be found, because in his condition it was dangerous to walk around, since he was likely to have a concussion, maybe even a craniocerebral trauma or worse in the accident, and he was terrified at the thought that the green-haired man might be lying unconscious somewhere without anyone discovering him. Luffy's cries grew more and more desperate as their search dragged on and his soaked body shivered with cold, so Law decided to drag him back to the car before he caught pneumonia.  
"No, I'm not leaving until I find them," Luffy said stubbornly, freeing himself from the doctor's clutches.  
"We don't even know where to look, Luffy! They could be anywhere," Law said, but Luffy didn't listen and pushed further into the woods, closely followed by Law, who was afraid of losing his friend. Maybe he should call the others for help, because the chances of finding them were very slim. Law rummaged in his jacket pocket and pulled out his cell phone, but a glance at his display told him that there was no reception and he cursed.  
"Damn, I can't get any reception here, we're completely on our own, Luf... fy?" Law had only let him out of his sight for a moment while he was looking for his cell phone, but that was enough to make him completely lose sight of him. He frantically turned his head in all directions, but he couldn't see Luffy anywhere because the forest seemed to get denser and denser the further he went in, and he panicked and screamed at the top of his lungs. Eventually he lost all orientation and wandered aimlessly around. Each tree looked like the other to him and seemed to devour his calls, for he received no answer. What could he do? Try to go back to the car? But he could not possibly leave Luffy alone, he would never find his way back.  
"Damn Luffyyyyyyy!!!!!" he cried out in despair and his voice echoed eerily through the woods, at least at first he thought it was his echo, but then he realized that it was neither his echo nor the voice he heard, but someone else's and he ran in the direction he thought he heard the voice from. The rain continued to pour down mercilessly from above and his clothes stuck to his body, yet he kept running until he suddenly stopped. His eyes widened in disbelief when he saw Luffy between the trees, who was not alone, because Sanji was with him. The cook had wrapped his arm around the neck of his friend and was limping with his left foot. Law immediately rushed up to them and knelt to examine his friend's foot, who groaned in pain as Law took off his shoe and then his socks to look at him. Luckily, it only seemed to be sprained, but he still wanted to have it x-rayed at the hospital.   
"How did this happen?" he asked and came back up.  
"I tripped over a root and twisted my foot while trying to break the fall," Sanji confessed angrily. He was also completely soaked and shivering from the cold and the blond strands were hanging in his face. Law turned to Luffy and reached out with his hand. Luffy's eyes stared stunned at Law and he rubbed his hand across his aching cheek.  
"Hey, that hurt!"   
"It serves you right! You scared the hell out of me, idiot!" Law said and Luffy looked at his friend angrily. But then he stretched out his arm and pulled Law towards him with his free arm. He was relieved that he had not only found Sanji but Law as well and felt sorry for making his boyfriend worry because he knew how much he cared about those close to him and gave Law a kiss on the cheek to make up for the trouble he had caused.  
"Save the cuddles, I'm mad at you. Besides, we'd better get back to the car and have Sanji's foot x-rayed. To me it just looks like a sprain, but I'd rather make sure that everything is really okay."  
"No..." Sanji protested out of the blue. His friends understood his concern for Zoro but his health was more important at the moment, since he was soaked wet and wouldn´t stop shaking from the cold. From Corby he knew that Zoro's car had been found at three in the morning, which meant that Sanji had been looking for him for at least four hours without success so far. The chances of them finding Zoro were nil, yet Sanji persisted, because he couldn´t stand the thought that Zoro might be laying somewhere, injured, waiting for them to find him.   
"I'm not leaving until I find that idiot," Sanji said determinedly and Law sighed.  
"Do you think you will help us by dragging you through this forest all the time? We'll go to the hospital now and check your foot and then we'll go back and keep looking for Zoro in case the police haven't found him by then," Law suggested, looking into the forest. Law did not believe he had run that far into the woods, in his condition, but where else could he be? Maybe he had dragged himself to the next rest stop and was already in some hospital. Law at least hoped so and was determined to do everything possible to find him.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello and welcome to the new chapter!
> 
> I´m very sorry for the shock in the last chapter, but as you have certainly noticed, things are getting intense.   
> But I hope you keep reading. As always thank you for the kudos and thank sooozyj for your comment!  
> The next chapter will be available on the 20th of September. I apologize for the wait, but I will be busy for the next two weeks, that´s why I finished this chapter as fast as I could, to make up for the wait a bit.  
> I hope to see you soon!

An hour later they finally found their way out of the forest and drove directly to the hospital. Law's suspicion that Sanji´s injury was a sprain was confirmed and the blond was able to go home after his foot was bandaged. Law on the other hand had to stay in the hospital to cover for a sick colleague, so Sanji and Luffy had to drive back to the accident site alone. That was their plan, but Law made it clear that neither of them would drive, as Luffy was too amped and Sanji was too tired to drive. They both protested vehemently, but Law, who had time to think, tried to talk them out of their obsession, because it would not make sense to look any further while it was still raining. Besides, they did not even know where to look for Zoro.  
Furiously Luffy rushed out the emergency room door into the rain to get to Law's car. Halfway there, however, he remembered that he did not have the keys and he looked back at the hospital building. Even if he went back, Law would never give him the keys and Sanji's car, was still at a rest stop half a kilometre from the accident site, as Sanji had told them. He briefly searched his pockets but unfortunately, he had left his wallet at home, so he didn't even have money for a cab to take Sanji back to the accident site.   
"Damn, I forgot Sanji," Luffy cried, who remembered that he had just run off without waiting for the blond guy. He quickly hurried back into the building and found his friend in the entrance area, where he came towards him on a crutch.  
"What a good friend you are, just running off without waiting for me" Sanji remarked sarcastically.  
"I'm sorry," Luffy said, snatching Sanji's crutch from him and putting the cook's arm around his neck, who frowned questioningly.  
"It's the least I can do for my best friend. Also... I am sorry we argued. I really missed you." Luffy gently bumped his forehead against Sanji's head, who returned the little headbutt, relieved that they had settled their quarrel. When Luffy asked if Sanji had been thinking of taking money with him, he said yes, and they went outside to look for a cab while crossing the parking lot. A red pickup truck caught their attention, that raced up the parking lot and in a rapid curve finally stopped in front of them and splashed them wet. Both looked flabbergasted at Franky's face, who pushed up his sunglasses with his index finger and asked if they wanted a ride. Both jumped into the car immediately and Franky left the parking lot just as quickly as he had come. Luffy asked how Franky had learned where they were. Franky explained that Law had sent him a message asking if he could pick them up and drive them home and he had agreed to do so as he was free to spend time with his current project and therefore had some time. Luffy tried to persuade him to help them and almost caused an accident when Franky stepped on the brakes without warning and looked at his friend in horror.   
"What do you mean Zoro has disappeared? And what car accident?!" Luffy tried to tell him everything in a short version and the more he found out the paler and calmer Franky became. Unfortunately, he agreed with Law and wanted to drive them home, which Luffy did not agree with at all. Angrily, he demanded support from Sanji, but the cook sat slumped in the back seat and snored softly.   
"Sorry Luffy, but it would be crazy to keep looking for Zoro with all this rain pouring from above. I do not like to leave Zoro out there either, but... how do you think you are going to look for Zoro with Sanji's sprained foot? No, leave it to the police. They have more options. Where is the girl?"  
"I don't know. Probably with Ussop.  
"Then we'll leave her there. Sanji should rest for now," Franky decided and wanted to take Luffy home first and then Sanji, but Luffy insisted that he drive him to Ussop´s so he could take care of her until Sanji was awake. 

Ussop was already impatiently awaiting them and literally ripped the door open when the bell rang. Franky inquired where he could lay Sanji, who he carried into the apartment in his arms, and headed for the bedroom at Ussop's request. Sessa was already awake and watched over the edge of her cocoa cup as Franky's strong figure carried the sleeping Sanji through the room and followed him into the bedroom. Her little fingers clawed into the blanket and dragged themselves to the bed where her father's motionless figure lay.   
"Come on sweetie, go back into the living room. Your daddy needs some rest, he's had a tough morning," Franky said and gently shooed her off the bed. Luffy rushed over immediately and offered Sessa to ride on his back, but the little girl just could not take her eyes off Sanji.  
"You better get her out, Luffy and try to distract her until Sanji is awake," Ussop advised him and approached the bed where Franky was already starting to take off the wet clothes and wrap the cook in the warm blanket. The blond man's lips looked almost transparent and his skin pale, which accentuated his dark circles. No wonder Sessa looked so disturbed, he really looked like a corpse. Concerned, Ussop asked about Zoro, but Franky just shook his head and said that Zoro was still missing.   
"How can that be? He must be at the scene of the accident, Zoro doesn't just get up and walk away after a car accident," Ussop said, searching for an answer in his friend's worried facial features. But Franky shrugged his shoulders in helplessness because he had no idea but hoped the police would find him soon.   
Ussop shook his head. No, he could not imagine for the life of him that he had done so, but he had not seen the car either. All he knew was what Sanji had told him when he had rung him and Robin out of bed in the middle of the night and asked him to look after Sessa and that was not much. He would have loved to go to the scene of the accident to look for Zoro because the waiting and the uncertainty drove him crazy but he had to stay with Sessa because Robin had to work and so he spent his time reading Sessa from a children's book he had written while waiting for a message from Sanji. But the more time had passed, the more restless he had become and had started to imagine the worst horror scenarios.   
"Hey, don't worry about it, the police will find him," Franky tried to calm him, who saw his frightened expression and patted him on the back to cheer him up. He was right, they had to stay optimistic, otherwise they would go crazy just because of Sanji who needed his friends now more than ever. From his closet Ussop took out dry clothes for his friends and went into the living room with Franky. He almost cried out when he saw the black-haired man sitting naked on his couch.  
"You piglet, could have at least left your underpants on! What would Sessa think?"  
"But they were wet too! Besides, Sessa has no problem with it!"  
"Don't ever let Sanji know that you exposed yourself to his daughter or he´ll kill you!"  
Luffy suddenly got serious and asked Ussop if he could stay here until Sanji woke up. Since he had to work on his chapter anyway, he did not mind, and Luffy quickly slipped into pants and shirt. Since they both had the same stature and size, they fitted Luffy and he thanked Ussop and asked if he would like to help him find Zoro, but he also denied and Luffy jumped up.  
"Then you really want to abandon Zoro? What if he is badly hurt somewhere and needs our help," he shouted and Sessa sobbed, given the volume. Immediately Luffy sat down on the couch with her again and gently nudged her with the tip of his nose.   
"Hey, no need to be afraid. I may be cheeky sometimes, but I would never raise my voice to you, you hear me? I love you too much for that," he said and rubbed his cheek against Sessa's red blond mop of hair, whereupon she stretched her little hands over her head and buried them in Ruffy's black hair.  
"'Nough Wuffy!"   
Slowly Luffy came loose and beamed all over his face. Even Ussop and Franky could not believe that Sessa had just spoken and looked at each other speechlessly. Franky wiped away tears of joy from his eyes. If only Sanji had heard that. He would certainly have been happy about it. 

When Sanji awoke hours later, he straightened up in bed and was confused at first because he did not recognize his surroundings. His heart was still racing from the nightmare he had just woken up from and his hand was shaking as he led it to his head and ran his blonde streaks. He remembered that he had been to the cemetery, to Nami's cemetery, and that he had looked into a dark black hole that gaped at his feet, from which, on closer inspection, he thought he recognized a hand that had slowly risen from the grave and wrapped itself around his ankle, trying to pull him down. He had tried to free himself, but the more he struggled, the stronger its grip became and a deep, hoarse, desperate voice, which had spoken to him from the hole, had shouted “Help me! Help me Sanji!”  
Sanji got goose bumps all over his body when he remembered the nightmare again and he threw back the blanket.   
Horrified, he realized that he was naked underneath and his eyes searched the room for his clothes but could not find them and his confusion grew even more. What was going on here? Who had undressed him? He tried to remember what had happened before he fell asleep and remembered that he had been sitting in Franky's car last before he fell asleep. But this was not Franky's apartment, it was too clean for that and it did not smell of motor oil. No, he was in Ussop's apartment, which meant that Franky had brought him here and he remembered in shame that he had not checked in with Ussop since he had dropped Sessa off.   
At the thought of his daughter, Sanji jumped up and noticed a small pile of clothes that Ussop had probably laid out for him because they were neatly folded at the foot end. They were a bit short, but he put them on, and when he opened the door to the bedroom, a dozen pairs of eyes looked at him, and before he knew it, four arms were thrown around his neck.  
"I'm so glad you're okay," Carrot sobbed and buried her face in Sanji's neck, while Chopper broke away from Sanji and pushed his shirt up to press his stethoscope against Sanji's chest.   
"I'm fine, really" mumbled Sanji as Chopper also shoved a wooden stick in his mouth to check his throat. But the doctor seemed unconvinced and ordered him to stay in bed. Sanji tried to make him understand that this was not possible because he had to take care of Sessa, but Luffy promised him that he would be happy to do so.  
"This is not necessary because I am fine!"   
"No, you don't! You're not well, you don't sleep enough, judging by the bags under your eyes, you have a sprained foot and you can't rest because you have to take care of your daughter, who gains nothing when you collapse from exhaustion. That is why I will move in with you for a while, so that I can better monitor your health. And do not try to argue with me, this is a doctor's order."  
Sanji sighed. It would not do any good anyway to contradict Chopper once he was in his doctor´s mode, so he agreed. Maybe a little extra company would do him good.  
"Me too," Luffy yelled and raised his arms as if he were triumphing over something, ramming his elbow into Ussop's eye, who sat next to him.  
Sanji shook his head violently. It was okay for him to take Chopper for a few days and let his medical care take over, but with Luffy, chaos would break out at his house and he did not need that. Luffy, however, was unstoppable in his enthusiasm and was already on fire for the idea and proudly announced to Sessa that they could set up a teepee in her room where they could tell each other stories in the evening until they fell asleep.   
"And what about Law," Sanji asked, who did not even bother to hide how little he liked the idea.  
"He'll be happy to have a few weeks' rest from me”  
Sanji´s eyes almost popped out when he heard that and stumbled over his own words while speaking.  
"We... wee... weeks! No way Luffy, never ever!"  
But Chopper seemed very fond of the idea as he consulted with Luffy about where they slept best and shared the care of Sanji. The cook groaned. What did he got himself into.

That same day Luffy and Chopper moved in with their belongings and although Sanji kept thinking about Zoro and was checking his cell phone regularly hoping to find a message from Corby on his display, he didn't answer and Sanji's tension and anxiety grew until he couldn't stand it anymore and called him himself. Unfortunately, he had nothing new to report, because the passenger they found in Zoro's car was in a coma and could not give any information about the accident. The doctors could not even say when he would reawaken. But he reassured Sanji that he was already searching for Zoro and was confident that they would find him soon, or at least he made every effort to sound that way to reassure him. This was difficult, though, when Sanji didn't even know what had happened to his ex-boyfriend and if he was still alive at all, and Sanji decided to take a little smoking break and went outside. When he opened the door, his eyes fell on a small, unlabeled envelope that made Sanji freeze. He had received such a letter before, exactly one week ago, and when he saw this envelope, he remembered the deadline he had received and his whole body shook as he bent down to pick it up. His heart pounded against his chest and he held his breath as he tore open the envelope and pulled out a loose piece of paper with only a link printed on it. A knot formed in Sanji's stomach as the pieces of the puzzle began to come together in his head.  
"No, no, no..." he said repeatedly, shaking his head violently. This could not be, it...   
Sanji ran up the stairs to the second floor and fell onto the bed with his laptop. He hastily entered the link and nervously drummed his fingers around on his laptop as the site slowly built up. A page opened on the screen that was completely white except for a small black square window and a timer that was under the black window. Sanji couldn't see anything, but suddenly he heard a distorted, eerie voice saying the same sentence repeatedly: "If you want your friend back, give me the money before time runs out and he suffocates.”


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again!
> 
> Thank you all for your patience I really appreciate it! As I said before, I don´t have much time, so this chapter will be very short. But I will try to make the next chapter longer. Unfortunately, I have to get back to my two week release schedule, because at the moment I have no other choice due to time constraints. Please forive me.  
> Thank you for all your support, especially to sooozyj for your sweet comments!  
> See you in two weeks!

After Sanji's horrible discovery, Luffy immediately called everyone because Sanji was in obvious shock after what he had seen. The others were horrified as well by the ultimatum and the threat it posed. Luffy walked up and down the living room like a tiger, imagining all sorts of scenarios of how he would kill the kidnapper. But first he was to tell them where he had hidden Zoro. Thinking of his friend, Luffy would have loved to storm off immediately, but Jimbei was able to hold him back and shook his head.  
"There's no point in just storming off. You'd better use your energy to figure out how to raise the ransom."  
They knew from Sanji that he could not get the one million that Nami had left him, at least not the whole amount at once, and Vivi, who could give him the money, was out of their reach and didn´t respond to their calls. Even Brook could not get that much money because he had his money tied up. They ran out of options as time ran out against Zoro. In the meantime, they had even called Corby, who immediately promised to find out more about the ominous website, but the chances were slim since the kidnapper, presumably his IP address, was protected by a VPN. To distract himself, Chopper had gone to the kitchen to make tea for everyone and carried the pot and a few cups on a tray into the living room. At the sight of his friend sitting in his armchair, slumped down like a puppet who had had its strings cut off, his heart became heavy. Sanji had been through so much, endured so much pain, and he was seriously worried about that he might not be able to take it all anymore and would break. That is why they had to find Zoro, because Chopper could not imagine what would happen if they did not find him, so he banned the thought from his mind. Quickly he hurried to pour a cup for everyone, which they accepted with thanks.  
After he had filled the last cup with the hot liquid, he handed it to Sanji, who did not even reach out his hand to receive it.  
"Please Sanji, take a sip. It will calm your nerves," he assured him and held the cup right under his nose as it suddenly flew across the room and the hot contents poured over Sanji's sleeves and the carpet. Sanji screamed that he did not need anything to calm himself down because he did not want to. It was the first emotional reaction since he had found him in his bedroom with his laptop open, completely catatonic and unresponsive.  
He did not even react when Franky simply lifted Sanji up and carried him into the living room because Chopper was afraid to leave him alone. All eyes were focused on the blond, whose arm sank powerlessly down to his head and buried it in his hair.  
"I'm sorry..." he apologized, but Chopper assured him that he was not angry with him and asked Sanji to roll up his sleeve to make sure he did not get serious burns. Fortunately, the hot liquid had only soaked the sleeve, but had not penetrated the sweater, so he could devote his attention to the stain on the carpet, which was slowly seeping into the fibers. Somehow, he was glad to escape to the kitchen, because Sanji's violent reaction had frightened him and, once his heart had calmed down again, he returned to the living room. He almost collided with Robin, who had just come down the stairs and returned to the others with a smile to announce the good news.  
"I´m getting the money from my bank. I've just arranged online for it to be paid out tomorrow."  
They all looked at her unbelievingly, because it was not self-evident that she would give away so much money, especially to a person she did not even know.  
Ussop seemed speechless. He had known that Robin was wealthy but didn´t know how rich she really was.  
Everyone could hardly believe their luck, especially Sanji who finally looked up and watched her with big eyes.  
"I can't ask you to do that," he said, shaking his head in disbelief, but Robin assured him that she would not miss the money and that there was nothing to worry about.  
But Sanji insisted on paying her back, even though he had no idea how, since he still had the mortgage on the house to pay off. He had to accept the offer of a serial revival of Germa 66 if it would allow him to pay back part of the money to Robin. The thought alone made him nauseous, but if it meant he could save Zoro, he was ready to swallow his pride.  
Sanji looked at the dark-haired girl who smiled at him encouragingly and wondered why she was helping him, because she did not even know him, not even Zoro, and he could hardly express the gratitude he felt. His eyes gleamed moistly as he gently took her hands in his and pressed a tender kiss on the back of her hands. He did not feel comfortable throwing money down the throat of some crazy maniac, but they had no choice. Robin promised him to take tomorrow off and drive him to the drop-off point so he could deposit the key to the locker at Nami's grave. Everyone hoped that the kidnapper would quickly check out the grave, that he might even be lying in wait for them to bring him the key. There was no guarantee that he would release Zoro afterwards, but unfortunately, he could not think of any other possibility and so the next day he accompanied Robin to the bank while Luffy took care of Sessa.  
When they later went to Nami's grave to drop off the key to the safety deposit box, Sanji kept looking around furtively, hoping maybe to discover the kidnapper, and he looked critically at everyone who walked past them, but no one seemed suspicious to him. With a heavy heart and a queasy feeling, he placed the envelope with the locker key and the address on the grave and looked at Nami's gravestone. He could only hope that this was the end of the matter and that Zoro would quickly be released, as unharmed as possible. 

Zoro could feel his eyelids hanging heavy as lead over his eyes and tried to blink the darkness away, but he just could not. His head boomed and he was dizzy and sick. With his tongue he licked his dry lips, longing for water, trying to remember what had happened, but the images in his head were diffuse. Although every muscle of his body was aching, he tried to move, trying to figure out where he was and why it was so dark here, but everywhere his hands and legs went he encountered resistance and Zoro slowly realized that he was trapped. Locked in a wooden box. But who had done this? And why? And what was that musty smell hanging in the air? With hands and feet, he tried to lift the lid of the wooden box, but it was too heavy. Something was lying on top of the box, probably earth according to the smell and cold sweat ran down his skin. He had to get out of here... as fast as possible...  
Zoro tried to breathe calmly, but with every breath he took he felt he was getting less air and he fought against the budding panic that was slowly constricting his chest. Just like back then...  
"I have to get out of here... out..." Zoro whispered, gasping for air, and scratched his fingers on the lid. In his burgeoning panic he called for help, but no one could hear him down here. He was literally swallowed up by the ground.

The next few hours seemed to pass almost in slow motion without Sanji hearing anything, neither from Corby nor the kidnapper, and his impatience turned more and more into frustration and irritability, which he tried to soften by constantly pausing for smoke while watching the road in both directions. Luffy and Chopper had a hard time getting him back into the house, but when Sessa suddenly stood in front of him and looked up at him, he realized again that he had neglected his daughter and he felt guilty. He went back into the house on his crutch and tried to cook dinner for everyone as best he could, which he succeeded in doing thanks to the active support of his daughter. But somehow, he did not feel any appetite, but stared thoughtlessly at the window again.  
"I'm sure he'll be in touch soon," Chopper tried to give him hope and tried to smile encouragingly, but Luffy disagreed and suggested spending the night in the cemetery and ambushing the kidnapper to beat Zoro's whereabouts out of him. Sanji protectively laid hands on his daughter's ears and told Luffy to watch his words in her presence if he didn't want him to send him home, but Luffy didn't let him stop him and decided to go to the cemetery alone if the others didn't want to come along. But he could not get any further than the door, because as soon as he opened it, he found a white, unmarked envelope on the doormat, which he tore open. Sanji hardly dared to look over his shoulder as he approached his friend from behind and read the short lines.  
Are you kidding me?! What do I want with one million?! You owe me 300 million! You have time to get the money by the deadline. Otherwise your friend is dead.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello and welcome again!  
> I have to apologize for the length of this chapter, but I ´m so stressed at the moment, that it affects my creativitiy. Therefore, I´m not sure when I will be able to upload the next chapter, but I will make up for it somehow, because you support me so much and make me very happy with every comment or kudo. <3  
> Please be patient with me.  
> See you soon hopefully!

The agonizing uncertainty and waiting drove him crazy. Restlessly, he tossed and turned in the bed, pushing Luffy away from him. He had asked him to sleep in his bed, as the sofa bed was too uncomfortable for him and Sanji had let him slip under the blanket. He knew from Law that Luffy developed an incredible body heat at night that turned him into a little oven, while he was more the type who liked to keep it cool at night. That is why he always left the window open at night. But the black-haired guy remained persistent and kept looking for Sanji's closeness, whom he obviously thought was Law, because he kept muttering his name while he slept. Sanji hoped that he wouldn't try anything more, and after he had spent an hour avoiding his arms and legs, he finally got tired of it and fled to the kitchen where he brewed himself a pot of tea.  
The steaming liquid calmed his nerves somewhat, which had been strained to the breaking point since the last blackmail letter, and which revolved around only one topic. Why? Why 300 million? And above all: What did Nami have to do with the whole thing? He found no answers to his questions and, dejected, let his head sink down onto the steaming teacup. Even if he and his daughter were completely in debt, it still wouldn't be enough to save Zoro and his desperation turned to anger at the thought of the mug rattling against the tiled wall and alerting Chopper, who was lured by the noise, rushed into the kitchen and found Sanji collapsed on the kitchen chair. 

The blond man's head lay heavily on his hands and his lips trembled, though hardly noticeable, and when Chopper looked at the opposite wall, he saw the shards and a dark liquid pouring from the sideboard onto the floor.  
It hurt Chopper so much to see his friend so desperate and he felt out of place, like an intruder. He would have loved to sneak away before Sanji realized that this was how he saw him. But he didn't want to leave him alone either, he wanted to be there for him, just like he had been there for him during his medical studies when he had been close to giving up many times because he had believed he would not make it. And they were not even close friends. Actually he and Zoro were much closer, but Sanji had always felt that it was important to take care of others and to help wherever he could, especially those who were special to Zoro, and so he and Sanji had become friends too. Chopper approached the cook, who finally noticed him and ran his hands over his face before raising his head. His eyes shimmered moist and his voice sounded fragile and was little more than a whisper when he apologized for the noise. Chopper offered to pick up the shards, but Sanji shook his head and limped, leaning on his crutch to get around the table and placed the shards on a shovel, one by one. The doctor hurried to his aid for fear of cutting himself and swept the small shards of glass with a hand brush onto the shovel, some of which were dyed red, and he looked with horror at the wounded hand from which the blood ran in small trickles over Sanji's hand.  
"Oh God, you are hurt. Wait, I'll just get my first aid kit."  
But Sanji continued to lay the shards on the shovel, regardless of the injury, muttering almost as if in a trance.  
"It's broken. Zoro's cup is broken... I have to glue it back together..." he stammered to himself and his hands trembled. To prevent him from getting any more injuries, Chopper took Sanji's hands and tried to convince him how hopeless his undertaking was. But Sanji snatched his hands from him.  
"But I have to try! It was Zoro's favorite cup," he cried angrily and looked to the door as he heard his daughter's voice, reminding him again that she was still there and that his screaming had probably woken her up. He tore off a piece of kitchen roll and hurried into the hallway to check on her, leaving Chopper alone, who was looking at the shards lying on the floor.

Sanji and Chopper were not the only ones who could not sleep. Robin had checked countless websites in search of the strange symbols she had seen in Sessa's drawings, while time ticked on incessantly. She knew that the answer was within her grasp, but it was hidden in her memories behind a locked door to which she had no key.  
Page after page she searched until her eyes hurt, but she ignored the tiredness and paid no attention to the small flashing light on her cell phone that told her she had received a message. She didn't need to look to know that it was Ussop who was probably inquiring how she was doing or who just wished her a good night and she felt bad for him because she knew, or rather she felt, that he had strong feelings for her, feelings she didn't know if she could reciprocate the same way.  
He was very kind and attentive and she felt more comfortable with him than she had felt in a long time, but it was unfair to him if he invested more feelings in her when she was not sure if she could return them. She liked him, very much, but was that enough? She probably found it so hard to get involved with him properly because she was afraid. Fear of confiding in him. Her eyes gazed thoughtfully at the screen as a new page opened and she could barely suppress a cry of joy when she finally found what she was looking for and began to decipher the symbols on Sessa's drawing, which revealed the name of a bank and a number, probably the number of a safe deposit box, and she reached for her cell phone to write him, about what she had just found out. But when she checked her messages, she found another message from her employee Kalifa, who had asked her to check Nami's past, especially her last employers, which she had not told Ussop or Sanji about. Kalifa told her that she had written her an email and Robin opened her inbox and the email, which was encrypted with a password that only she and Kalifa knew. She scanned the information and her eyes darkened. The data her assistant had collected for her was worse than she had feared, and she took off her reading glasses to massage the root of her nose and consider what step to take next.  
She would have preferred to leave Ussop and his friends out of it completely to protect her, but she had no choice, because she at least had to let Sanji in on it so he knew and was aware of the danger in which not only his friend, but also he and his daughter were involved and looked at the clock. It was already six o'clock, yet she would only call him later when the bank opened. Or she would simply pick him up and drive him there directly. But not alone. Robin wrote a short message and then put the phone aside. Maybe she should lie down for a while before she started thinking about it and went to the window that reached down to the floor and offered her a fantastic view of the city, which was slowly bathed in a soft red by the dawn.

Sanji blinked tired and surprised when he saw Robin smiling, wishing him a good morning and asking him if she could come in. He was glad that he was already dressed and ready, so he did not seem as miserable as he felt. At least he hoped so, but the dark-haired woman did not let on and entered the house.  
"Where are the others," she inquired and Sanji pointed to the kitchen with a nod and explained that they were having breakfast.  
"Very good because I need to talk to you alone if I can.  
Sanji was immediately awake and asked Robin to sit down. The smile that had been there just a moment ago had disappeared and she seemed serious. It was obvious that she had something on her mind, but she found it hard to say and he sat down as well in case he heard something that knocked him out.  
"I know that what I'm about to tell you sounds too incredible to be true, but it is. Unfortunately. I run a security company that specializes in protecting not only people but also data. But just as I can protect data, I also know how to access data and can do research on people. People like Nami, for example. I do not know to what extent she was involved, but I know that she embezzled money. 300 million to be exact, with which she went abroad and went into hiding."  
Sanji heard the words, but they just did not make sense to him. Nami had embezzled money?! He just couldn't believe it. He shook his head violently and assured Robin that she was wrong, that Nami would never do such a thing, but he could see in Robin's eyes that she was serious.  
"I wish it were so, but... The fact is that Nami worked for a company that laundered money for others, including the mafia.  
At these words, Sanji jumped up in horror and bit his lower lip when his sprained foot came up.  
"Never! Nami was not a criminal! She would never have needed such a thing!! You must be mistaken Robin!!"  
Robin reached into her handbag and pulled out a folded piece of paper to push Sanji across the table. It was one of Sessa's drawings on which someone had written down a name, an address, and a number in pen. Robin explained to him that the symbols were shorthand symbols that Nami Sessa had probably taught her before she died and that they pointed to a safe deposit box in a bank, presumably the place where the three hundred million was located. Sanji still shook his head in disbelief and let himself fall into the armchair behind him without turning his gaze away from the drawing. His hands automatically reached for the drawing and looked at it. The whole thing could only be a mistake, a nightmare from which he simply did not wake up. He knew Nami, she had been his best friend, the mother of his daughter, a decent person who would never have gotten involved in any criminal business. But why else would Zoro have been kidnapped? If the mafia was behind it, who guaranteed him that Zoro was still alive? That they would get him back safe and sound? Sanji's head sank exhausted on his hands, and although he was aware that Robin was there, he could not help but sob unrestrainedly.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my dear readers!
> 
> I´m very sorry for the delay of this chapter but there are a lot of things in my life going on right now I have to deal with so forgive me. I hope things will settle soon though, because I hate to disappoint you, because I know what it is like to wait for new chapters. But I will make up for the delayment somehow.  
> Thank you to all you wonderful people, who are still reading this story, although some chapters are delaying and supporting me with kudos and/or comments. It means a lot to me!
> 
> Hope to see you soon and stay safe everyone!

Zoro found it increasingly difficult to breathe and his fingers lightly brushed over the wooden lid that separated him from the outside world. The sweaty clothes stuck to his skin and the coppery smell of his own blood caused him to feel nauseous. But maybe the nausea was also caused by the headaches. Every breath hurt unspeakably, so he tried to breathe as shallowly as possible while waiting for the cook and the others to find him. He would have preferred to give in to fatigue and sleep, but he knew that if he did, he might not wake up and decided to stay awake. Like a mantra, he breathed the names of his friends and tried to delay the fainting that was approaching with each additional breath. Desperate, he pressed his mouth against the wooden box and tried to catch some air through the small, narrow cracks of the rickety, holey coffin, but all he felt was the taste of musty earth trickling in through the holes. Disgusted, he spat it out and licked his tongue over the brittle lips, which had already dried out completely due to the lack of water. He did not even have saliva to wet his parched throat and longed for a beverage. Throughout his life, he had never dealt with death before, even after Nami had died, he had ignored the transience of human existence and instead focused on his anger, which had eaten him up inside, like a creeping poison that flowed through his veins. But now, as he was slowly facing death himself, all that anger, pain and wounded pride lost their meaning, because they would not help him out of his underground prison, would not comfort him over the fact that he might die down here. Chopper... Luffy... Ussop... Franky... Brook... Jimbei... Carrot... the cook... he probably would not see any of them again and the thought tied up his chest, which carefully rose and fell. Zoro felt himself slowly drifting away and threatened to lose consciousness, trying to cling to life with all his might, thinking of his friends who would never forgive him if he simply died. "Damn... hurry... you... cook..." Zoro panted with his last strength and scraping his fingers across the wood.

Since they had left the bank, Sanji had not said a word, just stared silently out the window, pressed the key to the safe deposit box firmly to his chest, and looked up at the blue sky. Oh Nami, he thought bitterly, what trouble have you gotten yourself into? He still could not believe that the mother of his child had not only laundered money for gangsters but had also fled abroad with the money and their joint child. At first, he vehemently denied her involvement and defended her, but when he opened the locker and saw the money with his own eyes, he suddenly fell silent and a terrible pain spread in his heart. Sanji felt like he did not know Nami at all. Dejected, he laid his head on the glass, felt the cold, smooth surface, and closed his eyes, hoping that when he opened them again, it would all be a dream. When he heard Robin's voice through the intercom, he opened his eyes and looked into the blue eyes of the dark-haired woman sitting in the passenger seat, watching him worried. Sanji pressed the button on the PA system installed in the back of the driver's seat and assured her that everything was fine, but he could tell by the look in her eyes that she did not believe him, neither the warm brown eyes of her co-worker Rob Lucci, who watched Sanji through the rear-view mirror and spoke softly to him without taking his eyes off the road. "Don´t worry, we'll find him," he assured Sanji and Robin nodded. 

She hoped so, at least, because she had little hope that the kidnappers would voluntarily reveal the location to them. She was not even sure that the kidnappers did not eliminate Sanji and Sessa as well once they had the money, after all, both were witnesses and knew about the money. It would be easy for the kidnappers to kill them, so they were not allowed to let them out of their sight for a second. For this reason, Robin had arranged for someone to keep watch on Sanji's street and follow him if necessary until they could think of something better. Lucci seemed to see something in his rear-view mirror because his gaze kept scurrying backwards. Since the back seat was separated from the driver's cabin by a soundproof glass panel, Sanji could not hear them unless they turned on the PA system. Robin inquired what was going on. "I'm not sure, but this black car, behind us, has been driving behind us for quite a while. I first noticed it shortly after we left the bank. It disappeared again shortly after, but it's back now."   
"Do you think it's one of the kidnappers?"  
Lucci shook those shoulder-length black curls that were sticking out from under his melon.  
"If so, they either work very sloppily or they are so sure of themselves that they don't even try to keep a low profile."  
Robin now observed the vehicle more closely. Lucci was right, the driving was quite conspicuous, as if he wanted them to notice that he was following them. This might be an intimidation tactic by the kidnappers and her suspicion was awakened. If the kidnappers were so obvious, it could only mean one thing: that they planned to kill them as soon as they had the money. Maybe they were even already waiting for them at the cemetery. No, that would be too dangerous in broad daylight. But they would not attack them here either, there were too many other vehicles on the road.  
So, there was only the cemetery, or they just waited for the opportunity to take them out. Robin was afraid that something like this could happen and had two more of her best men posted in the cemetery waiting for them, who would intervene if necessary. When they saw the big iron gate of the cemetery from afar, Lucci slowed down and rolled almost leisurely into a small parking niche in front of the cemetery and got out of the car to open the door for Sanji, which he unlocked by pressing a button on his remote control. Sanji did not even notice they had stopped and fell almost forward out of the car as the door opened. Worried, Robin if everything was okay. The cook nodded and walked with them silently up the gravel path to the cemetery. Robin was glad that she had at least convinced his other friends not to come along, but as a precaution she had posted one of her employees in front of Sanji's house in case one of them tried to follow them.

Lucci formed the taillight of their small group, but made sure to stay right behind them, letting his eyes wander in all directions while he kept murmuring something quietly to himself. Robin knew that he was using his small lapel microphone to contact his two colleagues, Blueno and Kaku, who were also in the cemetery and lurking somewhere. The driver who had followed them in the car had also entered the parking lot, but now he was no longer watching. This circumstance worried Lucci a little, but he did not let on, because the blond man they were supposed to protect seemed tense enough as it was. Soon they reached their destination and the blonde handed Robin the key, which she put in an envelope before she returned the envelope to him so he could put it on the grave. There was no one else around, only two rows away an elderly woman passed them, who seemed to be surreptitiously checking them out. Almost hesitantly, the blond crouched down and carefully laid the letter on the grave. His hand glided over the earth as if he were stroking the small mound of earth and he whispered something softly, but Lucci could not understand it.  
Robin grabbed the blond by the arm and pulled him up carefully.  
"Let us go. Now all we have to do is wait," Robin said and led Sanji back to the car.   
Lucci's eyes flitted across the cemetery, but apart from an older man with a long beard and bald head who shuffled past them, no one was to be seen. The old man supported his bent torso on a walking stick and even seemed to slow down his walk as he approached them. Lucci's dark eyes watched the stranger, and when he was at the same level with him, Lucci grabbed the old man's arm suddenly and, in a lightning-fast movement, turned the arm onto the man´s back where he twisted it slightly, whereupon the old man cried out in pain.  
"What is this?!" Sanji asked and wanted to hit Lucci on the back of the head with his crutch, but Robin prevented this by gently but firmly holding Sanji's wrist.  
"Wait Sanji..." she advised him and watched as Lucci reached under the man's jacket with his other, free hand and pulled out a pistol which he held in front of the stranger's face.  
"Where do you get such beautiful weapons? From the police?"  
Let go of me, I'm on your side," the stranger begged and asked Lucci to reach into the inside breast pocket and pull out the ID card that was inside.  
The black-haired man did as he was told, and as his gaze fell on the document, he slowly released the grip around the wrist of his counterpart and lifted his eyebrows questioningly.  
"SWORD? I know you Secret Service guys are fast, but not that fast, so how long have you known?"  
The old man tugged at the latex mask that had come loose when he was attacked, exposing a reddish-brown goatee and full hair that he had combed to a side parting. Despite the attack he remained calm and tried to explain the situation to them.  
"Ever since Mr. Vinsmoke first set foot in this graveyard. No, earlier, but to explain that would be going too far right now. First, we have to get the key back before it's gone. If we lose any trace of the organization three years of hard work will be wiped out."  
"Does this mean that they knew from the beginning that gangsters were after me and my family and still watched as they kidnapped my boyfriend," Sanji asked, whose voice emanated an ominous calm that strangely worried Robin. The secret agent tried to explain the reason to him, but Sanji was not interested in what he heard. He was boiling with rage inside, which exploded from one moment to the next, and with his crutch he swept the feet of the stranger beneath him and pressed the handle of the crutch against the agent's larynx, causing it to rattle. Although the blond sounded calm and composed, the stranger could literally feel the hatred in his voice.   
"You allowed my boyfriend to be kidnapped and a friend of his to be seriously injured, and you still dare to say this to my face? I swear if I don't get him back in one piece, you will pay for it for the rest of your live, I swear," Sanji assured him and raised his head when he felt Robin's hand on his upper arm, which was trying to gently pull the crutch away from him.   
"I understand your anger all too well, but alive he is more use to us than dead, Sanji.”  
The agent nodded as best he could with the crutch at his throat and affirmed that he wanted to help him, that he even already located Zoro and that a hundred agents were already on their way to free him. When Sanji heard this, he became very frantic and immediately took his crutch from the agent's neck and helped him to his feet. Cawing and gasping for air, he explained them the way to a garbage dump and told them to tell the other agents that he sent them, so they would let them on the grounds. The agent hurried to the grave hoping to find the key there to put a tiny transmitter on the envelope that looked like a piece of tape.  
Sanji was no longer interested in the envelope, all that mattered to him was to get to Zoro as quickly as possible, and he dialled Luffy's number as he returned to the parking lot. He did not care what the SWORD agents thought when he arrived with all his friends. The more they were, the faster they would find Zoro. Robin struggled to stop him from rushing out and reminded him to be considerate of his sprained foot, which would only get worse from all the strain. She was right, but Sanji found it hard to stay calm considering the situation, so Robin offered to park the car right in front of the cemetery so he could just jump in and hurry him and Lucci to the exit. The whole story became more and more hair-raising and Sanji was hoping it would have a happy ending.

The stench of garbage came from afar as they reached the dump, but Sanji was not driven away by it and hobbled on his crutch to the large wrought-iron gate that fenced off the area, where, as expected, dozens of agents, armed with shovels, were already digging up every inch of the grounds, but there was no sign of Zoro. A tall giant, with black hair and a moustache, blocked their path and looked grimly down at Sanji, who tried to push past him.  
"Let me through you giant gorilla," the cook cried and rammed his elbow into the tall man's side.  
"This is not possible! Private persons are not allowed to enter."  
"The man you are looking for by chance is my boyfriend, so let me search in. Or where do you think we got the information from," Sanji asked, giving him the name of the agent before he crushed him in the back with his crutch and pushed past him. Immediately, a dozen heads looked over at Sanji and watched as he laboriously dropped the crutch slowly to his knees and began to dig with his bare hands. Robin and Lucci also began to dig, albeit reluctantly, because the foul stench of garbage and the thousands upon thousands of flies circling through the air were hard to bear. But no matter where they searched, they could not find a trace of a coffin or anything like that anywhere, and Sanji looked around in panic and pondered. Probably they had to look for a recently dug hole, but Sanji could hardly concentrate because he was so nauseous.  
"I think I have found something. Looks like a rotten wooden box. It seems to be connected to gas bottle, at least a hose runs into it..."  
Sanji bit his lower lip in pain as he pulled himself back up on the crutch and pushed the agent standing in front of the pit aside as he reached him and kicked the crate in with his foot. Bursting, the lid shattered and exposed the expressionless face of Zoro, who was lying there motionless with his eyes closed. Sanji quickly settled on his knees, but his mood immediately changed to fear when he recognized the writing on the bottle: C02, also known as carbon dioxide. Apparently Zoro had been poisoned with it and Sanji immediately started blowing oxygen into Zoro's mouth and nose, asking if anyone had called an ambulance yet. The agent picked himself up and told Sanji that an ambulance was already on the scene and immediately signalled to a colleague to call the ambulance while Sanji continued to breathe some air into the green-haired man. He did not know if it helped but hoped it did and put his head on Zoro's chest to check his heartbeat, which was very faint.  
"Come on Zoro, open your eyes. I am not going to let you leave too, you hear me. Stay with me," Sanji yelled and blew air into his partner's mouth again while he waited impatiently for the paramedic.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my dears and welcome back to a new chapter!  
> I tried my best to finish this chapter as fast as I could, to make up for the long wait of chapter 21, so I hope you like the result. I was very happy, to read all your comments (thank you to kyr_105, sooozyj and sakurareindeer) and I´m very thankful for all the kudos and the support I get here. It is such a joy, to know that there are so many ZoSan lovers still out there, even if we don´t get much ZoSan moments in the manga or the anime at the moment. But hope never dies! ;) (fingers crossed)  
> I will upload the next chapter in December (probably around the 10th of December), but I won´t promise it, because I got a lot of things to do before Christmas and I´m not sure if i can make it in time.
> 
> Please stay safe until then and take care of you!

He almost spilled the black, hot liquid that was steaming in the small plastic cup and cursed his own scatteredness that almost scalded the blond mop of hair in front of him. Fortunately, Sanji was sleeping and did not notice any of this. When Ussop had left the room five minutes ago, he had been awake and talking to him, but the exhaustion seemed to have finally won over him, even though Sanji had fought it so vehemently. Since Zoro had been hospitalized, he refused to leave his side and to go home to his daughter, who was looked after Chopper, while Luffy was sitting at Zoro´s side too. The black-haired tore the steaming cup from Ussop's hand and greedily drank from it.  
"Bleugh, coffee! Without sugar! Why didn't you bring any cocoa," Luffy asked in disgust and spat the coffee on the blanket.  
"Are you crazy? It was meant for Sanji! You are vividly enough, even without caffeine! Why do you not go home and get some sleep," Ussop yelled at him and put the cup on the table. "I'm not going back to sleep until Zoro wakes up!" Luffy replied.  
Ussop sighed and rolled his eyes annoyed. Sometimes Luffy could be really exhausting.  
"And what about Sessa?"  
"She is with Sanji's father. He came right away and almost tore her out of my hands when I asked him if he could take care of her so I could stay with Zoro and Chopper could lie down for a bit before taking his shift”, Luffy said and turned around, when the door flew open and Law entered the room, a scowl on his face.  
"In case you have forgotten, you're in a hospital. Zoro has just had surgery and needs rest, so you either shut up or leave.  
They both apologized meekly, and Luffy asked how long it took Zoro to wake up. Unfortunately the doctor couldn't give an answer because Zoro had a concussion, numerous bruises and two broken ribs, one of which would have injured his lungs by a hair's breadth, so Zoro had to take a break for the next 6 weeks from sports and work. Zoro would not like that, but on the other hand he should be thankful that he was still alive after all he had gone through. If it had not been for the secret service, they probably would have found him dead, because the kidnappers had tried to poison him with carbon dioxide.  
Sanji's body stirred and slowly he opened his eyes and rose from the mattress. Completely sleepy, he inquired what was going on and wiped the sleep from his eyes. Ussop assured him that everything was fine and handed him the coffee mug that Sanji accepted with thanks. The blue eyes looked tired and exhausted at the motionless body of Zoro, which was standing in the pale light of the neon tube hanging over Zoro's bed and did not notice how the hand that was resting on his shoulder.  
"Go home and take care of your daughter. There is nothing you can do for him right now anyway. He is safe now and is guarded, by monitors and by the nurses. I get off work in an hour, but Chopper will be here in half an hour and will check on him regularly. We have also instructed the nurses to visit him as often as possible and let you know as soon as he wakes up.  
"I don't know," Sanji replied without turning his eyes away from Zoro. Law looked at Ussop, but he seemed just as perplexed and shrugged his shoulders. He could understand the fear for Zoro, but he needed some rest, if he didn´t want to collapse.   
"Law is right Sanji, Zoro is safe. We will all take turns from now on so that someone is always with him. You can still take care of him when he is awake. More importantly, you take care of Sessa. She needs you”, Ussop said and squeezed Sanji's shoulder gently. He gave him an encouraging smile that the cook could not see because he was still looking at Zoro.  
Only when Luffy mentioned that she was with her grandfather right now, he listened up and stared at Luffy with shock-widened eyes.  
"You left her with the old fart?! Are you crazy?!! It will take a S.W.A.T. team to free her," Sanji cried and ran his fingers through his already tousled hair. Sanji felt bad because he had not been taking care of Sessa lately and could only hope that she did not notice much of all the excitement. He had done everything he could to keep her from finding out about Zoro's kidnapping and tried to stay calm when she was near him. Even though he was not comfortable leaving Zoro, his friends were right, and he decided to pick up Sessa and go home with her and come back tomorrow.  
Law had to promise him to call as soon as Zoro woke up and left the room, closely followed by Luffy, who gave Law a wet kiss on the cheek as a goodbye before following Sanji outside. He did not really like Luffy accompanying him to his old man, but he had no other choice because he needed him to look after Sessa, in case he suddenly had to go to the hospital. The sun was slowly setting in the west as they headed to the northern part of the city. 

Even after Sanji had moved out, Zeff had not had the heart to sell the house he and his wife had once lived in. A comforting, warm feeling spread inside him when he saw his former home. Unfortunately, this state did not last long, because when he saw the grumpy face of his adoptive father, he knew immediately that a thunderstorm was waiting for him.  
"Hello," Ruffy greeted Zeff joyfully and held his nose up sniffing the air. The water ran down his mouth as the fine aroma of food unfolded in his olfactory buds and his eyes lit up in delight.  
"Yummy, it smells delicious here! Can I have some?" Luffy asked and pushed his nose past Zeff through the crack of the door. The old man nodded his head at Luffy to come in, but Sanji pulled him back by his collar and shook his head.  
"We don't have time for this, Sessa must go to bed."  
"She's still eating, so Luffy can eat with us, there's plenty of food." Sanji was sure about that. Whenever Zeff had visitors, even if it was just ONE, the old geezer served up as if he had to feed an entire soccer team and donated the leftovers to the soup kitchen. Zeff pulled Luffy by his arm through the door and asked him to eat as much as he wanted, pushing Sanji much harder with his other hand. At the last second, Sanji could prevent him from falling and hissed at Zeff as soon as he had regained his balance.  
"What is your damn problem?!"   
"The question should rather be which one is yours! Why do I have to hear about your problems through your friends?!"  
"I would have told you!"   
Zeff grunted, but at least he lowered his arms and asked how Zoro was doing. Sanji told him everything, even the thing with Nami and the black money, and Zeff's face became more and more serious and worried. After Sanji got all the grief off his chest, he surprisingly felt better and looked up at his foster father who slowly found his voice again.   
"If you want, you and Sessa can sleep here tonight, in your old room. Or you can leave her here and go home to sleep it. You look like you have been chewed up and thrown up. I can take time off if necessary."  
"So that the restaurant goes bankrupt? You know yourself that one of us always must be there, otherwise the others do what they want, and chaos breaks out. No, I am going home with Sessa. If you really want company, I can leave Luffy with you, so you can stuff him with food until your heart´s content.  
The old man had heard Sanji's words but ignored them and pushed his adopted son into the kitchen by pressing his hand on his shoulder blade. Sanji was not actually hungry, but he forced himself, or rather Zeff forced him, to take a bite before Luffy plastered everything. Satisfied, Luffy rubbed his full stomach when he finally leaned back in his chair.   
"Man, that was delicious! No wonder Sanji has become such an excellent cook! Hey Sanji, can you scratch my belly, I'm so full I feel like I'm going to burst," Luffy said and burped loudly. Sanji shook his head vigorously and made it clear that this was Law's job, but Sessa climbed down from her chair to stroke Luffy's belly with her little hands. The black-haired man smiled from ear to ear and stroked Sessa tenderly over the red-blonde hair. At the sight of the two of them, Sanji could not sit still anymore and jumped up much to the amazement of all present.  
"We have to go," he suddenly exclaimed, and the chair tilted backwards due to the rapid movement and landed noisily on the floor. Luffy thanked him and followed Sanji, who had grabbed Sessa and was almost at the front door when he finally caught up with him and asked anxiously why he was in such a hurry suddenly. The cook did not answer him, just thanked Zeff for the food before pulling Sessa by the hand to the car. Luffy sensed that something was wrong. Silently, he watched as the cook tore open the back door of the car, pulled Sessa's child seat out of the car, deposited it in the passenger seat, put Sessa in it and finally circled the car to take a seat on the driver's side. Luffy quickly hurried to get in and sat in the seat behind Sessa.   
"What's wrong with you all of a sudden," Ruffy demanded, but Sanji just started the engine and drove off in silence. Throughout the ride, Luffy tried to talk to Sanji, but no matter what he did, the cook remained persistently silent and gnashed his teeth loudly until Luffy got tired of his behaviour and looked out the window in frustration. 

Only when they reached Sanji's house and went inside, Luffy tried to talk to Sanji again, who carried the sleeping Sessa into the house, while he supported himself with the other, free hand on his crutch and almost got the door slammed into his face, when he tried to follow Sanji into Sessa´s dormitory. If Sessa was not sleeping, he would have yelled at him, but for her sake he held back and waited until the blond had undressed her and put her into her pyjamas. She seemed so tired that she did not even wake up when Sanji took the clothes off and dressed her. Only when she heard Luffy's voice wishing her a good night did she blink sleepily and muttered "Good night Wuffy".  
The lovely sound of her voice as she said his name made Luffy smile and he lovingly brushed the strands of hair out of her face and for a moment he even forgot his anger with the blonde.  
"Isn't it great Sanji that Sessa dares to speak more and more often? In the beginning she did not even say hello and now she is already speaking small sentences" Luffy whispered pensive and smiled at his friend, whose face was hidden in the darkness.  
"Since when does she talk to you," Sanji asked whose voice sounded threatening and lurking. Ruffy tried to remember and shrugged his shoulders.  
"I don't know, at some point she started to. It doesn't matter, as long as she talks, does it?"  
Ruffy coughed when Sanji grabbed him by the collar and dragged him behind him until they reached the second floor. Angrily, Sanji slammed the bedroom door behind him and got in Luffy's way so he could not get out. The black-haired guy was starting to get angry and demanded that Sanji tell him what was going on.  
"What is your problem?! Have I done anything to you? You should be happy that Zoro is safe and that Sessa is slowly starting to talk!"  
"I would if she would talk to me, but she only talks to you! I am the one who comforts her when she cries for her mommy at night! I am the one who feeds her, dresses her, washes her, and takes care of her around the clock, but I do not even get a "thank you" from her. Do you have any idea how much it hurts? She is my little girl, not yours! I am her fucking father!!!" Sanji yelled angrily and tapped his finger on his chest. His hand was shaking and Luffy thought he saw tears in his eyes. Gently he stretched out his hands to touch Sanji, but the cook retreated and so the black-haired man had no choice but to calm him down with words.  
"I'm sorry, Sanji, I... I did not know she had never talked to you before. I really did not! But I cannot help it either. I am sure she will talk to you too one day. Just give her more time.  
Sanji lowered his head sadly and small drops fell on the carpet at his feet.  
"You don't get it, Luffy. It is not just about talking. It is about everything. You just have a connection to her that I do not have and probably never will. I... I get the feeling that she likes you better than me. I am not asking for much, just that she likes me. At least a little bit. I just want to hold her in my arms even when she is not crying and without her kicking and trying to free herself. And I would like to hear her call me daddy at least once," he said and raised his head. His face was covered with small, wet welts and his voice was little more than a breeze blowing at Luffy as he spoke. "Why is it so hard for her to love me?"


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello and welcome again!   
> I´m sorry for the delay but I was unable to finish it earlier. But you get a very long chapter therefore. And hopefully a new chapter next week, fingers crossed. Thank you all so much for your kudos and a special thank you to mulletzoro for your sweet comment, although the chapters are coming very irregularly at the moment.
> 
> Please stay safe everyone and see you soon hopefully!

Sanji limped down the long hospital hallway to the beat of his drumming heart as he tried to fix his tousled hair with his fingers. He had barely slept, because he could not stop thinking about Zoro and hoping he would finally wake up. But it was not just worry about Zoro that had kept him awake. The matter with Luffy just would not give him any peace either, who was quite depressed after their argument. The pain in the brown eyes of the black-haired man before he had left the house still haunted him. By a hair, he would have even gone after him if he had not received this message from Law, an hour after Luffy had left.  
I found Luffy like a heap of misery on your doorstep. He did not want to eat anything and went straight to bed. What happened?  
Sanji did not answer that but put the phone on silent and curled up on the bed. Until Chopper's call had startled him. Immediately Sanji had stripped off his pyjamas and hastily pulled on a pair of black pants and a shirt and had rudely awakened Sessa, who had reacted rather querulously, but at least she´d allowed him to dress her.  
By the time Sanji had his hand on the handle, he was already completely out of breath, his chest was rising and falling hastily, and his foot hurt like hell.   
Take it easy, stay cool. The nightmare is over, he is fine. So, do not fall around his neck unless you want to strangle him, Sanji reminded himself, and finally pushed down the handle.  
Disappointed, he realized that he was the last one in, because everyone else was already there and had gathered around Zoro's bed, facing the door. Except for Luffy and Law who were nowhere to be seen.  
When their eyes met, Sanji's heart stopped and he swallowed. The feeling of relief to see Zoro again, alive, was so overwhelming that he was speechless and forgot he could speak at all.  
"Well, who do we have here? What is the matter, did you see a ghost?" Zoro teased him, rousing Sanji from his stupor, who came limping toward him, pulling Sessa along with him.  
"It's not funny, but what can you expect from someone who laughs his head off at the comic strips in the newspaper," Sanji countered angrily, his face coming dangerously close to Zoro's as he did so.  
"At least I have a sense of humor. You have to tickle yourself under the armpits with a fork to make you laugh!"  
"That's so typical, no sooner do you see each other than the sparks start flying," Franky commented laughing at the exchange of blows and shoving a chair under Sanji's butt from behind.  
The blond did not even notice what happened to him as he was gently pushed down on the seat by Franky's strong hand and looked just as surprised as Sessa who looked up at the tall man with the turquoise hair and the prominent chin who smiled at her with a wink.   
"When are you going to be released?" Carrot asked, offering Sessa some of the homemade carrot cakes she had brought for Zoro.  
Zoro shrugged his shoulders.  
"I hope as soon as possible, before I turn into a skeleton. The food here is awful."  
"Hey, that's my line," Brook said gleefully, saying that Sanji would fix him up once he got home. A long silence ensued as everyone waited anxiously for Zoro's answer, who in turn eyed Sanji as if the decision were his.   
"Well...of course, he's coming to me, who else is going to take care of him? His friend surely can't right now!" said Sanji, immediately biting his lip. Oops, he had not wanted Zoro to learn of Johnny's serious accident this way. The mosshead's eyes looked down at the latter's hands clawing at the blanket, and his voice suddenly sounded serious and threatening.  
"It's okay, the others have already told me what happened to Johnny. Also, the reason why I was kidnapped."  
"But I don't understand how Nami could only get involved with such dangerous people," Carrot whispered, nibbling thoughtfully on a carrot cake.  
"I guess we'll never know. And even if we did, we could not change it, so we must accept things as they are, whether we like them or not," Zoro said, raising his eyes to look at Sanji. Again, there was a long pause until Jimbei finally rose from his seat with a noisy clearing of his throat and announced that he was going to the canteen. Immediately, the others joined in, one after the other, rising except for Carrot who sat in front of Zoro's bed, nibbling on her cake as she watched the intimate eye contact of the two spellbound.  
"Carrot..." Ussop called her, who was already halfway out the door.  
"Oh man, just when it's getting romantic," Carrot grumbled, gently grabbing Sessa's hand, "come on little one, we're not wanted here."  
Gruffly, Ussop grabbed Carrot by the arm and pulled her toward the door. Even Sessa followed them, lured out of the room by Carrot with more cakes.   
Sanji thought he could hear his heart beating frantically and lowered his gaze, hoping that it might make it easier for him to speak.  
"I heard that Chopper and Luffy moved in with you" Zoro finally interrupted the silence. Sanji winced at the words "with you" and craved a cigarette.  
"Yeah, but Luffy already moved out again. They... wanted to support me after you were kidnapped. But now that you are back, I am sure they'll move out again. Well, Chopper might not, you know him, he... likes to take care of others. Especially the ones he cares about."  
"True. Listen, about your offer, I..." Zoro suddenly paused, and when Sanji turned around, he saw the dark-haired mop of Luffy's hair, cautiously, peeking through the door.   
"Zoroooo! Man, it's good to see you awake again!!!" Luffy exclaimed, rushing into the room. Zoro cried out as Luffy pounced on him, hugging him tightly. Filled with horror, Law, who entered the room after Luffy, grabbed the black-haired man by the collar and pulled him off the green-haired man rudely, shaking him back and forth by his outstretched arm.   
"Are you out of your mind right now, Luffy? I don't feel like operating on Zoro again, so control yourself!"   
"Sorry, Zoro! I'm just so glad you're back!" Luffy said laughing and beaming all over his face. But then he caught sight of Sanji and his expression changed. When their eyes met, Luffy quickly turned his head back to Zoro and even circled around to sit on the other side of the bed, as far away from Sanji as possible. Zoro's gaze darted back and forth between Sanji and Luffy, but he said nothing, preferring to focus on answering Luffy's questions regarding the accident. Unfortunately, Zoro did not remember anything after the crash with the other car, at least nothing that had happened before he had woken up in that box. Throughout the conversation, Zoro's eyes kept wandering off into the distance, as if his mind were traveling back through time, and the more he talked, the deeper he sank back into the pillow, until his story ended abruptly, just as he reached his experiences in the coffin. His eyes seemed fixed and his pupils dilated, as if he saw something on the opposite wall that scared him to death. He did not even notice Sanji's hand, which was inches away from his own and briefly grazed the back of his hand before the cook pulled it away again and clamped his hands between his thighs.  
Sanji was torn. On the one hand, he saw that something was wrong with Zoro and wanted to comfort him, but on the other hand, he did not know if Zoro even wanted to be touched. They were not together anymore, after all. Sanji had no idea how they should deal with each other in the future. But at least he knew one thing: no matter how difficult it would be to find a light-hearted way of dealing with each other again, he would do everything to ensure that the contact between them did not break off again. Because a life without Zoro, was nothing compared to a life with him. They might argue often, but that was still better than the thought of never having him around again. Just like Nami. Even after everything he had learned about her, he just could not be mad at her. He missed her terribly and he was not sure if the pain her death had left, would ever heal. The only thing he had left of her was Sessa and he was so infinitely glad that he had her. That he had them all: his daughter, his friends, even his old man, who sometimes drove him mad. But above all, he was grateful that he still had Zoro, because he would never have coped with his death.  
Shortly after, the others returned, but only to say goodbye, but promised to visit Zoro again soon. Luffy and Law also rose from their chairs to say goodbye. Luffy was almost out the door when Sessa came running toward him. Luffy checked with Sanji to make sure it was okay for him to talk to her and carefully crouched down without taking his eyes off Sanji and took her small hands in his.   
"Listen, I... we...won't be able to see each other anytime soon, unfortunately. I am, I am sorry. Do not be sad. You still have your daddy, who I am sure will play horsy with you and do all the great things we did together. Will you promise me that? That you'll play horsey together?" Luffy tenderly nudged the tip of Sessa's nose with his own and rose. But just as he was about to leave, he felt something heavy on his leg, and when he looked down, Sessa had clung to his leg.  
"Don't go!" Don't go!" she screamed, burying her little face in his pant leg.  
"I can't..." Luffy said in a trembling voice, patting Sessa gently on the head, hoping she would calm down. His heart grew heavy as he heard her heart-wrenching sobs and his lips quivered. "Don't make this so hard for me..." he pleaded, rubbing his eyes repeatedly with his sleeve and looking over helpfully at Sanji, who was already rising.  
Sessa kicked and screamed as Sanji wrapped his arms around her and tore her away from Luffy.  
"Wuffy! Wuffy! Wuffy!" she cried, lashing out like a fury. Luffy fled almost in flight from the room and down the long hallway through the hospital to Law's car.   
Even long after Luffy had gone, Sessa still would not calm down. Her sobs had turned into hiccups by now.  
"Wu...hic...Wu...hic...Wu...hic...Wuffy.... hiccup!" she stuttered, turning her back on Sanji in hurt.  
"Was that really necessary to break her heart? What happened between you two?" Ussop inquired worriedly.  
"Nothing, we... just had a long overdue conversation, that's all" Sanji evaded the question. Before the others could ask him any more questions, he grabbed Sessa's hand and pulled her behind him. With all her might, Sessa tried to brace herself and even let her butt fall to the ground, just so she would not have to leave. Sanji felt like the last ass, but what could he do? He had to put Luffy in his place, even if it hurt himself to hurt his friend like that. Otherwise, he would never develop a close relationship with Sessa. Sighing, he picked Sessa up, said goodbye, and carried her to the car. The people around them, looked at Sanji with a mixture of disgust as he hobbled along the flight with Sessa under his arm on his crutch, but he did not care what they thought of him, he just wanted to leave.   
Arriving home, he tucked Sessa into bed, by now completely overtired from exertion, who had finally cried herself to sleep from sheer excitement and leaned back against the door after closing it quietly behind him. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, pressing the heels of his hands as hard as he could against his eyelids to hold back the tears that ran down his face. 

The next few days were not easy, for Sessa was sulky and unforgiving. Not even candy would make her feel better about the loss. Sanji was about to call Luffy and ask him to come over, but he also knew that if he did, the fuss would be for nothing. He had to stay strong and try to replace Sessa the playmate as best he could. Chopper helped him, but he could tell Sessa missed Luffy a lot. And so, did Sessa, as Chopper learned from Law, whom he met at the shift change. Both were worried about him, because he hardly had any appetite anymore and only ate because Law forced him to. Otherwise, he was completely apathetic and quiet, which worried Law the most, because Luffy was usually a loud, fun-loving bundle of energy who could hardly sit still. To distract him, Law drove him as often as possible to Zoro, who also had not missed Luffy's emotional state.  
"Listen, Luffy..." Zoro began three days after he woke up, "this can't go on." Zoro pointed his head at the plate in front of him.  
"You have to help me. I cannot get this down by myself. You usually stuff everything into you that you see. If I do not eat up again, that pushy nurse will come and try to feed me again. She does not understand that I am gay. She keeps coming in and trying to fluff my pillow and asking me if I need anything. I swear to you, if she puts her boobs in my face one more time to pull the pillow out from under my head, I'm going to punch her in the face no matter what the cook thinks."  
"Sorry Zoro I am not hungry."  
"Then at least make out with me when she comes right in to get the tray," Zoro begged, eliciting at least a small smile from the black-haired, the first in days.  
"I really love you, Zoro, but not that much. I know someone who would do that part, though" Luffy said, lowering his eyes sadly at the memory.  
Zoro ignored Luffy's comment and instead asked when he was going to talk to Sanji.  
"I don't know. I have never seen Sanji so angry, yet I did not do anything bad. All I wanted to do was cheer Sessa up and get her to open. To help her cope better with Nami's death. It was never my intention to hurt Sanji. But when I look at Sessa, I see Nami and I am not quite as sad anymore, because I know that a part of her is still there. That she lives on in Sessa. I would never take her away from Sanji or try to take her away from him. All I want is to spend time with Sessa. And as much as possible." Chopper, who was sitting next to Luffy and was checking Zoro's vital signs for the tenth time that day, butted into the conversation. "I understand you Luffy, but that's where the problem lies. You have been with her a lot lately and that is what's worrying Sanji. He is noticed that you and Sessa are close and possibly fears you might be a better father to Sessa than he is. Sanji has always wanted a family of his own, because he did not have one when he was young, not until he came to his adoptive parents. Through them, he realized how nice it is to have a family and what he was missing in his childhood."  
Zoro's upper body lowered further and further as he listened to Chopper, until his head finally rested on the pillow.  
"It was selfish of me to ask him to give up his dream of having his own family."  
Chopper remained silent, looking just as dumbfounded as Luffy. They both waited for the green-haired to continue and already thought he had fallen asleep because he didn't say anything more, but then he suddenly continued, "Family... for me it was always just a foreign word that I couldn't do anything with. I had no one and never wanted anyone, so my relationships were always limited to sex, even if some wanted more. But I never wanted to let anyone get close to me and therefore I tried not to let the cook get too close to me at that time. Well, as you can see, I didn't succeed."  
Zoro laughed, but it sounded bitter.  
"I never thought that one day it would be important to me to have a home, someone to wait for me when I return from work, but there it is. Sanji has... kind of become my family, my everything, and I believed that would be enough for him. That I would be enough for him. I know that sounds selfish now, but I wanted him all to myself and I wasn't willing to share him with anyone."  
Zoro turned his head to look at Luffy.   
"I understand Sanji all too well. What he feels when he sees you two together. That feeling of not belonging to them, like a third wheel."  
Chopper jumped up from his chair and literally lunged at Zoro, horrified by his words.  
"But you do belong, Zoro! Just because Sanji has a daughter now does not change his feelings for you! He misses you so much. I know it's hard for you to accept the fact that he has a child with Nami..."  
"I've already forgiven him for Nami."   
Chopper's eyes grew huge and stared at Zoro, who turned his head back to the opposite wall.  
"It took me long enough, but... I finally realized that I must look forward, not back. I can't change the past; I've realized that by now. Also... I do not want to be angry with Nami and the cook anymore. It is so terribly tiring and pointless, I realized that when... well... you know..."  
They knew all too well what Zoro meant, and at the thought, tears came to Chopper's eyes, which he inconspicuously wiped away with the heel of his hand. He was relieved to hear that Zoro had finally ticked off the one-night stand and hoped that maybe he was giving himself and the cook another chance. At the very least, he was going to try to convince him of that and put his hand on Zoro's.   
"I'm sure if you managed to let Sanji into your heart, you'll manage to like Sessa, too. You have grown fond of all of us too, haven't you? You just have to let it happen," Chopper assured him, but Zoro seemed less than convinced.  
"I don't know Chopper. I am scared. Even if I did, there is more to raising children than just love. It takes patience, understanding, empathy. And I do not know if I have all that. My father was... not the best example of a father."  
Ruffy was confused.  
"What do you mean by that? I thought you were too young when you came to the orphanage and had no memories of the time before that."  
"It doesn't matter. Forget what I said. I am tired. Would you mind going?" Zoro asked, turning on his side, his back facing Luffy and Chopper.   
"Sure. Sleep well, Zoro," Luffy said, taking the tray of food and quietly leaving the room with Chopper. In the hallway, Luffy quickly stuffed the remains of Zoro's food into his mouth and pressed the tray to a nurse's chest as they passed. Astonished, she looked first at the tray and then at Luffy and Chopper, but finally shrugged and took the tray to the kitchen.

It took a while for Law and Chopper to agree to Zoro's release, but when the time came, Sanji rushed to the hospital to pick him up. He left Sessa with Chopper because he did not want her to see him and Zoro fighting if he refused to come. On the way, he had picked up some beer and fresh ingredients for Zoro's favorite meal and slowly counted to ten before opening the door to Zoro's room. Astonished, he entered and looked around. The bed was freshly made and there was no sign of Zoro. He was not in the bathroom either, or Sanji was starting to get restless. When he encountered a nurse in the hallway, he inquired about Zoro and she told him, to Sanji's dismay, that Zoro had already left the hospital.  
Furious, Sanji got behind the steering wheel and immediately began calling all his friends and acquaintances to find out where he might be, but no one knew anything and the little knot in Sanji's stomach tightened more and more. Calm down, he will be ok. Maybe he is with that Bartolomeo guy? He hoped not, because he remembered all too well their last encounter, when he had tried to rip Zoro's boxers off him. Sanji raced to the latter's apartment and just barely managed to restrain himself from rushing into his apartment to look for Zoro himself. Bartolomeo, however, was just as worried when he heard he was looking for Zoro and did not know where he might be. Gritting his teeth, Sanji said goodbye and wondered where else Zoro might be. The only address he could think of now was this Johnny's, but Sanji had no idea where he lived and did not know how to get his address. Unless...  
Sanji dialed the hospital's number and asked to speak to Law, who answered after a while and inquired annoyed why he was calling him during his shift. Without responding to Law's bad mood, Sanji asked him to look up Johnny's address in the computer, but the doctor refused to give it to him because it was personal information.  
"What if you go by his place and see if Zoro is staying there? I just want to know where he is and if he's okay..."  
"I wish you were as concerned about Luffy as you are about Zoro. He's getting a lot of heat from your fight."  
The black-haired was the last one Sanji wanted to talk about now, yet he tried to remain calm.  
"He's crossed a line, Law. Hell knows, maybe Sessa will say dad to him someday."  
"Then do something, but not by punishing Luffy. Spend time with her, show her you are there for her like your adoptive parents were for you. And most importantly, you need to teach her who you are. Do not avoid the subject anymore because you do not want to confuse her. Why should she care if you were there for the first two years or not? The most important thing is that you are there for her now. Do not let her brush you off when you give her a hug. She'll get used to your loving ways eventually."  
Sanji had to grin at those words.  
"Like you and Luffy?"  
He could almost hear Law rolling his eyes on the other end, and even if he did not confirm it, Sanji knew he was right. A deep sigh sounded on the other end of the line.  
"Listen, my shift ends in an hour and then I'm going over there for a bit to see if Zoro is there. But you talk to Luffy, understand? And soon." After that, the line went dead and Sanji put his phone away in relief. Once home, he took care of lunch with Sessa and tried to suppress his worries. He tried to heed Law's advice and praised and stroked Sessa over the head as often as he could while they cooked, but she was so concentrated in her work that she did not seem to notice. When it finally got dark outside without Law calling, Sanji finally got so impatient that he decided to call him again. It rang and rang, but no one answered and Sanji angrily threw the cell phone into the other corner of the sofa where he was currently sitting. Why didn't he answer it? Had something happened? Or did he have to work overtime? Sanji wiggled his left leg nervously and was so lost in thought that he did not notice Chopper go to the door and open it. It was not until he heard voices that he looked up and saw the face of a young man with a red mohawk pointing his thumb behind him.   
"Found him when I was riding my motorcycle. Seemed disoriented so I gave him a ride. Gave this address here. If he is that squirrelly, you'd better not let him wander around the neighbourhood alone, mister."  
Wordlessly, Zoro pushed past the young man and only growled a "Don't say a word" to Chopper before pushing past both and into the house.  
Sanji's concern turned to anger and he jumped off the couch and stormed toward Zoro.  
"Why didn't you call? You could have calmly told me what you were up to and I would have picked you up right away. Or better yet, you would have waited for me at the hospital."  
"It was supposed to be a surprise, okay?"  
"More like the shock of my life!"  
"Nothing happened after all, so calm down!" replied Zoro to him, pushing his bag into Sanji's hand and hurrying towards the stairs, as he urgently needed to pee.  
"And what if something had happened to you? You almost died a little while ago!" Sanji yelled, following the green-haired man gesticulating wildly.  
Chopper and the young man watched the two and the man, who was two heads taller than Chopper, leaned down to him.  
"Are those two always like that?"  
Chopper nodded in relief, glad that Zoro was okay and that he finally heard him and Sanji talking to each other again, even if it was just an argument.  
"Been there, my girlfriend and I always fight too. But the make-up sex afterwards is insane. Here," he said, pressing earplugs into Chopper's hand.  
"For later, when they make up," he said with a wink, and said goodbye again before Chopper could ask him if he wanted to stay for dinner.  
Chopper closed the door and returned to the nursery to tend to Sessa, who was playing peacefully and apparently not bothered by the loud voices coming from upstairs.   
He was explaining to her how to check her heartbeat using a stethoscope he had brought her and pressed it to his own chest so she could hear his heart, when suddenly the voices returned to the first floor.  
"Damn cook, can't you even let me pee in peace? If you keep this up, I'll be out of here in a minute."  
Sanji's laugh dripped with derision.  
"To get lost again? Out of the question! I'll cook something and then I'll fix up the bed for you upstairs."  
"I'm certainly not sleeping in the same bed with you!"  
"Did I say you were? I am sleeping on the couch. With your broken ribs, I'm sure you won't sleep on the couch!"  
"I don't mind. Besides, it'll give me a chance to talk to Chopper and we can crack a few beers before bed."  
"I'm sure Chopper agrees that the couch isn't good for you!"  
Oh dear, now they were trying to drag him into their argument too, Chopper thought, waiting for the two to show up at the nursery. The blond entered the room first, but spoke, much more quietly, when he caught sight of his daughter.   
"Chopper would you mind sharing the couch with me tonight?"  
"Of course not," Chopper replied, glaring at Zoro, who glared angrily at him.  
"I´M sleeping on the couch."  
Chopper did not like having to take sides, as he felt extremely uncomfortable doing so, and looked from one to the other in search of help.  
"Why don't you both sleep in the same bed? I mean... you guys are grown up enough to share a bed, right?"  
Sanji and Zoro crossed their arms in front of their chests and both stared at each other grimly, as if searching the other's eyes for an answer. An eternity seemed to pass before they both broke the silence and lowered their arms.  
"Alright, you can sleep on the couch if you don't want to sleep in our bed" Sanji relented, but Zoro just shook his head and said that he would take the bed. Sanji was visibly relieved that Zoro agreed and went to the kitchen to prepare dinner and to make a phone call to Law whom he finally reached. The doctor apologized for not being able to go because he had to fill in for a colleague who had unexpectedly fallen ill.  
"It's okay, I'm just glad he's back," Sanji said, squinting in the hallway to make sure Zoro did not hear him, who was sitting in the living room with Chopper watching TV. Law had to say goodbye because his name was called out over the loudspeaker and he hung up without further ado. Sanji put the cell phone on the kitchen counter, his index finger resting on the display, and scrolled through the phone list, lost in thought, until he got stuck on Luffy's number. He chewed his thumbnail and thought. He wanted to call him, Zoro would surely be happy to see Luffy, but he was ashamed of his behavior and of the words he had thrown at Luffy and finally turned off his phone before he could change his mind and gave a loving look to Sessa, who was already tugging impatiently at his pant leg because she was finally going to cook.  
"Right away my darling" he assured her and sat her down on a chair.

After putting Sessa to bed, he returned to the living room, from where the television could be heard softly. Chopper had left for work and Zoro had made himself comfortable on the couch and was hammering frustratedly on the remote control, which obviously seemed to give up its service, because he had to press the button 5 times before the picture finally changed.  
"Damn this thing, I think it's out of batteries! And you forgot to buy new ones, of course. If this keeps up, it'll be dawn by the time I get through all the channels!"  
"Then leave it, there's nothing good on most of the time anyway!"  
"And what do you think I should do? Read one of your cookbooks?"   
Normally he would smack him for that line, but Sanji grinned instead, glad to be able to argue with him again. Just like before. The time after the breakup had made him painfully aware of how much he had missed the little everyday things with him, even the negative things. Although Sessa had helped a lot to distract him from his grief, she still had not been able to fill the void that Zoro had left in his heart when he had left. Sighing, he walked towards the couch and bent down to snatch the remote control out of Zoro's hand, and after pressing it twice, finally managed to switch it over. The green-haired man's eyes lit up as he caught sight of his favourite movie on the screen and Sanji rolled his eyes.   
"I'm going to bed," he announced and had almost reached the stairs when the green-haired one called him. Fortunately, the TV was not particularly loud, or he almost would not have heard it, so softly did Zoro speak.  
"Would you... watch it with me?"  
Sanji stopped on the step and looked at Zoro, who was still staring at the TV. He did not really like these kinds of movies, especially since he had just started watching them, but on the other hand, this was a chance to spend some time with him, even if it was strange to have Zoro around again. His heart galloped as he approached the sofa and the scent of Zoro's aftershave rose to his nose and he could almost touch his thick, bushy hair with his fingers. Who was he fooling here? His heart, his fingers, his lips, his whole damn body knew what he wanted and craved. How he would love to reach out and run his fingers through his thick mane of hair, slide onto his lap and kiss his lips raw.  
Instead, he dropped to the other end of the couch and propped his head up with his arm to keep from accidentally falling asleep. God, these samurai movies always followed the same pattern, how could Zoro tell them apart? It did not take Zoro five minutes to guess a movie, at least when it came to these kinds of movies, but otherwise he could not even tell a romance movie from a thriller. Sometimes it was a mystery to Sanji how they had managed to agree on a movie based on their different tastes. In the end, it had not mattered what they saw, because it did not take long for them to tear off their clothes anyway. And with Zoro, there usually was not much to take off anyway. Sanjis kept furtively eyeing Zoro, who sat there calmly sipping his beer. Damn, how could he stay so calm while he started to undress him with his eyes? Did his presence leave Zoro so cold? Maybe he should test him and let his hand slide slowly over Zoro's thigh? He knew that running his hand over the insides of his thighs made him hot. Or tickled his nipples with the tip of his tongue... Sanji quickly crossed his legs and tried to focus on the movie before he went crazy. Maybe he should go to the bathroom and release some pressure? Or talk to Zoro. But about what? What it was like to be buried alive? Nervously, he ran his hand through his hair and began to wiggle his foot.  
"What's wrong?" inquired Zoro, taking a hearty sip.  
"Nothing what should be?"  
"You're tense."  
"I'm not!" Sanji sounded more aggressive than intended.  
"Oh yeah?" Zoro held his foot but did not look at him.  
"Maybe it wasn't a good idea to move back in after all."  
By a hair, Sanji jumped up.  
"Why? You need someone to take care of you."  
"Chopper can take care of that, too. Or Luffy. He's offered to let me move back in with him and Law anyway."  
“No, seriously, It's all good!"  
"Then what's the problem?" he inquired, and Sanji lowered his eyes.  
"Nothing, it's just... I do not know... strange that you are here again, that we can sit next to each other and talk normally. Like we used to. Well, almost like we used to, because normally now we'd be... you know..."  
"Yeah, I know what you mean, and you are right, it's weird being back here. I had a lot of time to think in the hospital. About what happened and how to move on and..."  
"And what?"  
"Look, I can't just pretend like nothing happened after everything that happened. I have come to terms with your one-night stand, but... I do not know how to deal with your daughter. A family is something completely different than a partnership. I never wanted kids, but..."  
Zoro nervously ran his hand through his hair.  
"Hell, we were a couple for seven years and even though I could strangle you sometimes, I miss you, ok?"  
Zoro leaned his neck against the headrest, and there was suddenly something so vulnerable in his gaze that Sanji would have liked to slide across the couch to hold him. Zoro's voice sounded so sad and almost broke as he continued talking, and Sanji already thought Zoro was going to start crying at any moment, but he just swallowed and kept talking.  
"When I was in that damn hole, I really thought I was going to die, that I was never going to see you and the others again, and the thought scared the hell out of me. I think even more than my own death. I realize it will not be easy after everything that has happened, but... I'd still like to try," Zoro said, looking at Sanji.  
Sanji was so overwhelmed he did not know what to say and his heart was pounding. Was he serious? Was he just offering him a do-over? On all fours, he crawled across the couch and sat astride Zoro's lap, who stared at him with wide eyes as Sanji kissed him passionately. His hands gently pushed Zoro's T-shirt up, wanting to caress the hard abs underneath that he had missed so much, but Zoro pushed his T-shirt back down and cleared his throat embarrassedly as he slowly parted their lips.   
"Actually, I was going to suggest if we could stay friends."


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again my dear readers!
> 
> As promised you get a new chapter. I apologize for the length of the chapter, but I couldn´t split it, because I wanted the next big event to be the main theme of 25 as it will be Christmas themed chapter. Thank you for all your support and kudos and thank you to Sooozyj for your comment! I´m always happy to hear your thoughts and feelings regarding the chapters.  
> I have a little question for you guys, because I have an idea for a LawLu fic, which takes place after 'Blow', but which would also contain flashbacks about how Luffy and Law met, as well as some ZoSan scenes. So if you are interested in a LawLu fic after Blow please let me know in the comments or send me a private message.   
> I will upload the next chapter next week.  
> Stay safe and take care!

"F... friends?!"   
"Yes."  
"Are you serious?!"  
"Of course!"  
"We've never been 'just' friends! How are we supposed to do that?"  
"I don't know!"  
"Then why did you move back in?"  
"Because I... I... forget it! I am leaving. It was a shitty idea to move back in here."  
Zoro pushed Sanji off his lap rudely and rose to go up to the second floor. Sanji, however, was not going to let it go, because even though he was pissed at him, he did not want Zoro to move out. He had no idea if he would manage to be just friends with the green-haired man, but that was still better than to lose him again and being left alone with Sessa in the big house. As Zoro came back down the stairs with his bag, Sanji stood in his way.  
"You stay here!" he shouted, stretching out his arms as if he could block off the entire room.  
Zoro's eyes stared angrily at him and he tried to push past Sanji, but the blonde clung to him like a limpet and kept getting in his way, even when Zoro lashed out with his right arm, Sanji just ducked out from under him and would not let him pass.  
"Stop it! You can't keep me here against my will!"  
"You don't want to leave, or you wouldn't have returned!" said Sanji, grabbing Zoro's wrist as the latter's arm came flying back in his direction. Dark eyes blazed menacingly, yet Zoro didn't pull his arm back and Sanji continued in a calm tone, "while I don't know why you returned, I'm not going to pressure you into telling me. And as for this friendship thing... I do not like it, but I can understand that you cannot forget the whole thing so easily. I am sorry I reacted that way just now, but... I completely misunderstood your words and when I realized that I was angry and hurt and... also a little ashamed of myself for ambushing you like that with the kiss. I do not know if we can just be friends, but... I would like to try. So please... stay."  
Sanji loosened his grip on Zoro's wrist, and as his fingers closed around the carrying handle, the green-haired man did not even resist as Sanji took the bag from his hand and carried it upstairs to the bedroom, where he placed the clothes neatly in the closet in case Zoro changed his mind and tried to leave with the bag after all. In all the time since their break-up, he had not been able to bring himself to sort Zoro's things out of the closets. Probably, for the simple reason that the sight of the empty compartments, drawers, etc. would only have made him realize that Zoro had really disappeared from his life. Besides, his smell still clung to them, which had helped him find sleep at all, especially in the early days of their break-up. Sanji had just finished putting away everything when Zoro appeared in the doorway, looking around the room with his arms crossed over his chest.  
"Except for the bare walls in the hallway, nothing seems to have changed."  
"I couldn't stand to look at your ugly mug anymore, so I took the pictures down," Sanji explained, closing the drawer noisily before turning to Zoro and trying to grin as diabolically as he could while doing so, hoping to annoy him.   
"Which one of us has the ugly face here?" Zoro murmured to him as Sanji gently nudged his elbow into his side before stepping through the door into the hallway. 

Zoro threw the door shut behind him and looked around the room.   
There was something comforting about the familiar smell that surrounded him, and he hoped it would help him finally sleep through another night. Not wanting to keep the cook company in the living room again after the embarrassing scene just now, Zoro stripped off his clothes and lay down in bed, his eyes turned to the ceiling. At least five times he tried to close his eyes, but each time he did, he thought he smelled earth and opened them again. Finally, he turned to the side in frustration, but the sight of the empty bed only angered him more, so he turned back onto his back and rowed his arms up and down the bed until the cook's side of the bed was completely rumpled and contemplated his handiwork.  
What am I doing here? He thought and turned over onto his stomach. He would have preferred to sleep on the couch, as he had originally intended, but he did not want to go downstairs now and ask the cook if he would switch with him after all, because then he would have to explain why. Dejectedly, he let his head fall face-first onto the pillow and cursed, while he continued to absorb the familiar smell with every breath that slowly lulled him.

Ten minutes later, when Sanji quietly opened the bedroom door to get his bedding, he heard the familiar sounds of Zoro sleeping and quietly crept up to the bed. Somehow it was comforting for him to know that they were sleeping under the same roof again, even if he found the thought that there was a whole floor between them kind of strange. But after his kissing attack earlier, he would be careful not to make the next mistake and lie down in bed next to Zoro, and returned to the first floor with the bedding, where he made himself comfortable on the couch and watched a movie, which he had already forgotten about the next morning when his cell phone woke him up. His neck hurt a bit, probably because he had been lying wrong, and he was a bit tired because he had been up way too long, but after two cups of coffee he was finally awake enough to start the day and prepared breakfast for Sessa and Zoro, because Chopper was usually too tired to eat after his shift.   
As he was setting the table, the phone rang. It was Zeff, who sounded surprisingly cheerful considering he was a morning person.   
"Since I took the day off for today, I thought I'd spend the day with my family. So... what do you think about that? We could take Sessa to the zoo. You're welcome to bring your friends if they're up for it."  
"And what about the restaurant? Who's going to take care of everything when you and I aren't around?"  
"It won't burn down when I'm not around. Besides, I want to make up with my granddaughter what I unfortunately missed with you."  
Sanji hated him for trying to make him feel bad, yet he did not think it was a bad idea. This way he could spend a nice day with Sessa and avoid Zoro for a few hours after last night's embarrassment and promised to pick him up after breakfast.   
Zoro did not seem too sad about it when Sanji announced to him at breakfast that he was going to the zoo with Sessa, and Sessa did not seem too eager to stay home either, because Zoro's presence seemed to make her uncomfortable. She kept giving Zoro strange, almost fearful looks, as if he were the bogeyman or something similar, which did not surprise him, because he was equally irritated by the mooshead's naked torso.  
"Didn't you find the closet or why are you sitting naked at the table?"   
"I´m not naked!" Zoro said, standing up to show the cook the jeans he was wearing.  
"You really don't seem to have any sense of shame, or you'd at least put on a shirt in front of Sessa!"   
Angrily, Zoro stuffed the remains of his breakfast into his mouth and disappeared from the kitchen. Sanji stabbed him with his eyes and muttered to Sessa "never get involved with men, because they bring nothing but trouble." 

After Sanji and Sessa were dressed, they picked up Zeff, who sat down in the back with his granddaughter and proudly showed her the provisions he had prepared all morning.  
"You really didn't need to go to so much trouble. You should have used the time to finally sleep in."   
Zeff ignored Sanji's comment and instead pulled out a small plastic box that gave off a scent in the car that immediately made Sanji's mouth water.  
"If your dad eats any of this, he'll be glad I went to the trouble. It is his absolute favourite dish. You'll always get him with it, no matter how full he is. One day, when you're old enough, I'll tell you how to make it, and then you'll have the ultimate weapon against your father to appease him right back, no matter what you've done."  
"You're about to walk if you keep telling Sessa such nonsense!" Sanji said to him, giving him a warning look through the rearview mirror, which Zeff returned briefly before turning his attention back to Sessa, teaching her little finger games that he probably remembered from his long-ago childhood.  
"This is for you, Sessa, I hope you like it. It is very plain, but I'm sure it would look...good on you. It should be about your size..." Zeff said, finally pulling a garment out of a pouch he had attached to the backpack. His voice was suddenly barely audible as he gently unfolded the garment and held it out for Sessa to look at. Sanji glanced at it as well, but when he saw it, he quickly turned his gaze back to the front.  
"Thank you," Sanji said, and without looking back, reached behind him, snatched it from Zeff, and quickly dropped it into the glove compartment before the lump in his throat threatened to choke him. Zeff did not even protest but apologized to Sanji.  
"It´s fine," Sanji said, continuing to look down the road. It had been a lifetime ago, but Sanji remembered all too well the day when, by chance, he had discovered this garment with a few other things in a box in the attic and had shown it to his adoptive parents. His adoptive mother had then cried terribly and Zeff had sent Sanji to his room without any explanation, visiting him later to tell him the story of Clémentine. She was a sweet little baby that they had adopted at the age of 6 months after falling in love with her at first sight. Unfortunately, their happiness was short-lived because Clémentine was soon diagnosed with a very severe form of sarcoidosis, which had already progressed to the point where her little lungs were irreversibly damaged by the time, she was two years old and there was no chance of a cure. Her death had hit his adoptive mother especially hard, so hard that it had taken a long time before they could bring themselves to adopt a child again, but this time an older child, and they had chosen Sanji, whom they had also loved from the beginning, as his adoptive mother had assured him again and again, although at first, he did not want to believe her because he had never been loved by anyone. But at some point, he had realized that they were serious about him and was glad to have met them, because she had been the most loving, patient, understanding, and wonderful woman he had ever had the privilege of knowing.  
In the parking lot, Zeff unbuckled Sessa's seatbelt and helped her get out of the car, while Sanji bought the tickets and collected himself again. The bittersweet memories had made him painfully aware again of how much he still missed his adoptive mother, even after all these years.  
Sessa's hand had completely disappeared in her grandfather's huge paw, but she did not seem to fear him like she did Zoro and dutifully walked by his hand to the entrance and sucked one of Zeff's homemade chocolate candies filled with his homemade plum jam. This time, however, Sanji refrained from commenting and instead grabbed Sessa's other hand.  
"Won't you give your old man the pleasure and take my other hand? That way I have my granddaughter on my left hand and my son on my right."  
Sanji's head turned red as a fire alarm and he let go of Sessa's hand to cover her ears with both hands so she could not hear what he had to say to her grandfather.  
"How old do you think I am!!! What do you want people to think when they see us together? That you're my sugar daddy or something like that?"  
"Since when do you care what people think about you? If you did, I don't think you would have been with a man like that greenie. How are things with him, anyway?"  
Abruptly, Sanji quieted down and let go of Sessa's head. Sighing, he circled his daughter and Zeff and grabbed his old man's hand.  
"That bad, huh?" Zeff replied.  
"I don't want to talk about it."  
"Thanks for doing this, son," Zeff said, bringing the back of Sanji's hand to his mouth to plant a kiss on it.  
"Don't push your luck old fart! What's with the constant son talkl?"  
"I just want you to get used to the word. Maybe then you'll find it easier to pass yourself off to Sessa as her daddy."  
"You're impossible."  
"If you don't get your act together soon, I'm going to kiss your hand every time a woman comes toward us," Zeff said, and Sanji growled, but pulled Zeff behind him, toward the monkey house. Sessa watched the wild activity of the apes with interest, taking delight in the acrobatic feats of some particularly energetic chimps as they shimmied from one branch to the next. Zeff laughed and pointed to one particularly exuberant specimen that was still young and jumping back and forth excitedly.  
"That one, reminds me of your friend Luffy! Too bad he did not come with us; I am sure he would have enjoyed the monkey house too and Sessa loves spending time with him. Or are you guys having a fight?" Zeff asked, looking at his son from the side, but Sanji did not answer him and continued to watch the monkeys, so he left it at that. At least until they reached a small adventure playground. Zeff gave Sessa a shovel and bucket he had brought so she could play a bit in the sandbox. Patiently, he waited until Sessa was out of earshot before resuming the conversation regarding Luffy.  
"So, what's going on with you and the little one? And do not tell me now that nothing is wrong, I know you too well for that. You could literally feel the thick air after Sessa stroked his belly when we were having dinner last time."  
"We were just having a clarifying conversation about boundaries."  
"What kind of boundaries?"  
"Boundaries he crossed regarding Sessa. How am I supposed to build a relationship with Sessa if he keeps interfering? How is Sessa supposed to know who her father is if he's constantly trying to dispute that role with me?"  
Zeff used his foot to give Sanji a blow to the head.  
"Ouch! Why did you do that?"  
"Because you're an idiot, that's why!" Zeff said in a calm tone, dropping back down onto the bench.  
"You're just too impatient, Sanji. Some kids need time to get used to their new situation, especially for Sessa who overnight, lost her home and her mother. A little girl does not put that away easily. How is she supposed to find her way around when she is constantly being passed from one stranger to the next? She was just starting to find her way around in the orphanage and then you came along, a stranger who introduced himself as her father, and ripped her out of her environment again to put her in a new one. Does that sound familiar to you?” It seemed all too familiar to Sanji, and he felt ashamed that he had forgotten how he had felt back then, when he had been passed from one home to the next until he finally ended up with Zeff.  
"You weren't easy when you came to us either, you were rebellious and didn't trust anyone for fear that you would be sent back to the orphanage. It took us a long time to convince you that we meant business, but we stayed patient and gave you the time you needed to trust us and accept us as your parents. And to do that, you should accept the help from the rascal instead of sending him away, because he has this childlike, sincere nature that makes it easier for him to build trust with children, which is why he was able to make friends with Sessa so easily and gently build a bond with her. What do you think that does to her when all the people she ever cared about are suddenly ripped from her life? She will never learn to trust anyone, let alone you, if you take away the one person she was just starting to open to? Believe me, once she learns that love isn't synonymous with loss, she'll be ready to open up more and not only allow love, but eventually return it, just like you."  
Zeff nudged Sanji affectionately with his shoulder. "Believe me, Luffy is no competition for you. She knows who her father is, children can sense the invisible ties that bind them to their parents she just needs some more time to realize that she can trust you and that you will not let her down. You are a good and most importantly loving father, and I couldn't ask for a better dad for Sessa."  
Sanji's head jerked up and eyed Zeff, but he could only see sincerity in his eyes. Still, he asked him, "do you really believe that?"  
Zeff nodded and put his arm around Sanji's back to pull him close and pressed a fleeting kiss to the top of his head, something he had not done in a long time and this time Sanji did not snap at him but let him. Slowly, Zeff lowered his arm again.  
"So, what about that job offer for that movie they wanted to make with you and the other former cast members from back then? Did you accept it or not?"  
Sanji nodded and explained that he had no choice, because the one million Robin had lent him was gone. Besides, he would have enough money left over to pay off the rest of the loan from the house and put some more money aside for Sessa's studies so she could go to a good university later. Unfortunately, the contract also included a couple of promo appearances he had to do to promote the new movie and told him that he had to appear at the next Anime Con in costume.  
"I'm sure Sessa would love it, but I can't take her with me when I have to work."  
"Can't any of your friends accompany you?"  
"So, everyone knows?! Out of the question! Luffy would never leave me alone again and from the others would mock me about it for the rest of my life. No, it's enough if Zoro knows."  
"Then why don't you take him with you? Then he and Sessa can get to know each other a little better."  
"No way! Sessa is afraid of him. Besides, we are not together anymore. He...wants us to be just friends now."  
"Well, that's good."  
"Good?! What's good about it?"  
"It's still better than nothing. Or would you rather have no contact with him at all?"  
"No, of course not! But I... love him."  
"And that automatically rules out friendship? Before you have even tried? Who knows, maybe in time you will manage to get closer again. And if not, then... you'll still have your friendship."  
"That's not very comforting."  
"I'm afraid you have no choice if you don't want to lose him again."  
Sanji felt his foster father's large, strong hand squeeze his shoulder and smiled at him.  
"Thanks for listening...Dad."  
Zeff returned the smile.  
"See it's not that hard to say it."

Sanji spent the time until the Anime Con keeping fit for the photo shoot and not gaining weight, because he had contractually agreed to build up at least a little muscle mass until the start of filming, because he was to get a new suit that was more figure-hugging than the one, he had worn as a teenager. Normally he didn't have any trouble with that, because he always took care of his body and only treated himself to something sweet now and then, but Christmas was coming soon, and it was harder not to resist.   
Besides, he had to work out a fitness plan to build muscle mass and for that he needed a professional to help him train and for that there was only one: Zoro.  
However, Sanji was reluctant to ask him because he knew that Zoro could be ruthless when it came to training and that he would surely get his pure pleasure from torturing Sanji, so he decided not to go to Zoro's gym either, but to find another one or hire a private trainer. In this regard, the production company gave him free rein and even agreed to pay for the costs. For this reason, Sanji decided that it would be best if he did not tell Zoro about the shooting at all, or at least not until it could no longer be avoided, because sooner or later, he would notice that he was changing physically and then he would have to tell him the truth, but it was not time yet.  
For this reason, he left Sessa with Ussop and went to the Anime con alone. The advantage of being one of the performers was that you could get into the building through the side entrance without any problems and did not have to stand in line like everyone else, which saved him a lot of nerves. Now all that was left was to find someone from the production company to help him get ready for the performance, but where should he look? Sanji walked around pretty much disoriented until he bumped into a round guy, with a goatee, who seemed to be as surprised as he was that he hadn't noticed him and showed him his ID, hoping the guy could help him. He was lucky, he seemed to know his way around and pointed Sanji in the right direction. As he neared his destination, a handsome man with blue eyes, long blond hair and tight-fitting jeans came staggering towards him on black boots and introduced himself as Cavendish. He had a very feminine air and had his white shirt unbuttoned to the middle, presenting his perfect milk-white skin underneath, which Sanji tried not to stare at too much. Normally it rarely happened that Sanji stared at men like that, but he had to admit that this Cavendish was a decidedly attractive and very handsome man, probably thanks mostly to his feminine charisma, which had a certain attraction for Sanji.  
"Here you are at last!" he exclaimed, visibly pleased, and put his hand on Sanji's back, pushing him gently but firmly toward the locker room. Sanji fervently hoped not to bump into the other cast members, for he had found them rather arrogant and conceited even then, and was convinced that nothing had changed since. Only Reiju, he had liked and hoped that she was also in the reboot. Fortunately, none of them was in the cabin anymore and Sanji could change alone, well almost alone, because Cavendish did not leave his side and watched him.  
"Hey, I'll be fine. You can go," Sanji assured him, but Cavendish just shook his head. "No, I have to stick around to make sure everything is in the right places, and to be able to make any necessary alterations in case the measurements don't fit, which is why they had to come so early."  
As Sanji finished, Cavendish stepped closer and began tugging at the suit, making Sanji more than uncomfortable.  
"Hey, hey, that's enough, that's my butt you're fiddling with after all!" Sanji shouted, slapping away the man's hands that were about to tamper with his crotch.  
"Take it easy, I'm already done! Turn around! Perfect! The new suit looks great on you! The fans will go wild, especially the female ones!"  
Sanji could not stop his cheeks from turning red as he thought of all the female fans who would surround him to snuggle up and have a picture taken with him. "Where are the others?"  
"They're on their way to the interview. So, we will have to hurry a little with the hair so you can join them. Afterwards, you will have to endure a few photos and sign autographs, but then you can explore the grounds on your own in your costume and have your picture taken with fans if they want to. Don't be shy about it, there's always a bodyguard around to keep an eye on you in case any fans go nuts and get assaultive." Sanji hoped so and let Cavendish lead him first to the mask and then to the press conference. As soon as he entered the hall, he was greeted by flashing lights and screaming fans, one prettier than the other and Sanji tried to throw an air kiss to each one before sitting down next to Reiju who recognized him even after all these years and pulled him in for a hug.  
"It's good to see you again, Sanji!" she whispered, her face beaming with joy.  
"It's good to see you, too, Reiju. Would you like to go for a drink with me after the whole event?" he inquired, and Reiju nodded with a smile. "I'd love to, if we can walk afterwards from exhaustion!" she said, turning her attention to the fans and answering their questions.  
Unfortunately, Reiju was to be proven right, as the whole event seemed to drag on endlessly, and when they finally finished, Sanji was exhausted and could not wait to leave, as his bladder had been bothering him for half an hour.  
He felt infinitely relieved when he came out of the toilet a few minutes later and looked for Reiju, but unfortunately, he could not find her in the crowd, but a wispy, black head of hair that came running towards him. He should have guessed that Luffy would not miss the opportunity to show up here. Luffy almost jumped for joy when he saw him, because he did not know who was hiding under the Stealth Black costume and so his greeting was very stormy and warm.  
"Oh man, oh man, oh man! I cannot believe it! You see the Law; it is really him! Stealth Black!!! Oh man, I never thought you would be in the reboot! There was a rumor all over the forums that you didn't feel like it anymore and that's why you wouldn't be in it, but I defended you and said you'd definitely be in it!" Luffy babbled like a waterfall, not wanting to calm down at all, while Law just stood there looking at Sanji.  
"I'm so excited! Here feel this!" Luffy cried almost breathlessly, pressing Sanji's hand against his chest. Ruffy's heart was beating so wildly that Sanji could feel it quite clearly under his palm.

"I'm a huge fan of yours, you were my first masturbation fantasy when I was a teenager! And so was Law's!" Luffy confessed, grinning broadly, and collecting a blow to the head from Law, who had turned almost as red as Sanji. "That's... that's not right!" Law cried, who would have loved to sink into the ground in shame. Hectically, Luffy rummaged around in his pocket and asked to have his picture taken with him, but Sanji could not manage more than a nod, still trying to process the fact that Luffy used to jerk off whenever he thought about him. The black-haired one beamed all over his face and his cheeks burned as he leaned his head over to Sanji to snap the photo, and even Law jumped in at the last second and quickly stood on the other side of Sanji just before the flash lit up and went back to his original position afterwards as if nothing had happened.  
"Thank you, that's really nice of you! I have one more request. I bought this Special DVD- box set to give to a friend for Christmas and this action figure to give to his daughter, and I wanted to ask if you would sign both for me."  
Sanji looked at the two items and a thick lump formed in his throat, knowing how expensive the items were here at the convention, especially the action figure, because it had a memory function that allowed it to record little phrases that you just had to speak into the mic. Luffy must have spent all his money for this month that Law gave him every month, so Luffy had his own money to buy things he liked with.  
"Sure," Sanji said, first signing the box and then taking the figurine to sign it, accidentally touching a button on the doll, whereupon Luffy's voice rang out from the figurine.  
*"God jul Sessa. Jag älskar dig."  
Sanji did not even need to translate the words to know what they meant, because he could literally feel the love speaking from them, and he gulped. Luffy turned as bright red as a tomato and snatched it from Sanji. Lovingly, Luffy stroked the figure with the thumb of his right hand. "I thought it was a good idea to record something for her at first, but now that I think about it, maybe it's better to erase the recording again. I don't want her to get sad about it, or her dad to be mad at me," Luffy said, and was about to press the button for Sanji to record something new on it, but Sanji snatched it out of his hand and said he thought it was a great idea, at which point Luffy's face brightened.  
"You really think so?" he asked hopefully, and Sanji nodded.  
"I'm sure of it."   
Luffy looked down at the figure and Sanji thought he saw tears in his eyes.  
"I hope so."

*"Merry Christmas Sessa. Love you."


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas everyone!  
> I hope you are having a wonderful time with your families and get lots of presents!  
> I´m showered with so much love and support from you guys, that it makes me tear up happily.  
> I thank you all so, so, so much for your loving and encouraging words which give me so much joy and strength to continue with this story. (A special thank you goes to Kazz45690, 1996her, sooozyj and kyr_105 and all you other lovely people who gave me kudos, I´m speechless you are all so kind and sweet) This chapter got longer than expected, but there were so many things I wanted to squeeze into this chapter to thank you all, that I didn´t want to leave out even one bit, so it got out of control and became even longer than the last chapter. XD  
> The next chapter will be uploaded in January, I hope in the first week of January (fingers crossed!), but I don´t know if I can make it in time, so please be patient with me.   
> Until then, I wish you all a great time and I hope you have a nice start and a great 2021!  
> Stay safe and take care of you!   
> See you next year! Kisses and hugs!

December 23rd, Lillejulafton  
Sanji had been busy since the early hours of the morning cleaning and decorating the house so that Sessa would feel comfortable at home. For this reason, he had chosen a Swedish-French Christmas, because he not only wanted to introduce her to his Christmas customs, but also to keep up the old traditions of her mother, so that she would never forget Nami and especially her own roots.  
This included making the straw Christmas stars himself, and hanging them not only on the Christmas tree, but also all over the windows, and spotlighting them with small fairy lights and Advent candles that shone in the most beautiful shades of red and yellow. Zoro, being a real Christmas sourpuss, was of course not very enthusiastic about Sanji helping with the preparations, but he had no other choice if he wanted to have some of the Christmas ham, which Sanji also garnished in between, while he repeatedly sat down at the kitchen table with Zoro and helped him with the handicrafts. Unfortunately, the green-haired man had no hand at all when it came to such things and despaired after a short time.  
"Damn it! What am I doing here? The little girl won't be able to remember it later anyway when she's older!"  
"But she'll certainly feel more comfortable and secure when everything is festively decorated. Maybe she'll recognize some things from her time with Nami."  
"How can she remember that when she was only a year old at the time?"  
Sanji sighed and looked at the small straw star he was working on.  
"I just want this Christmas to be special. After all, it is our first Christmas together and even if she will not remember it later, I definitely will and I want to remember it fondly as the best Christmas of my life."  
Zoro took a hearty swig of his beer and inquired what else needed to be done.  
"Just these last straw stars and the food. So, nothing you could help me with. You could go wake up Sessa though, I'll be done with this in a minute."  
"Sure, if you want her to start the morning off right with a shock..."  
"That's okay, you're right, I'd better go wake her up myself," Sanji said, placing the last straw star next to Sessa's plate and looking at the nicely set Christmas table decorated with straw stars and paper angels. He fervently hoped she liked it and enjoyed the food, too, and warned Zoro not to touch anything or drink the homemade glögg* while he was gone, asking him to play the playlist of Christmas songs Sanji had put together yesterday on his phone and to continue drinking his beer later.  
The small body was completely buried under the thick comforter, with only the reddish-blond hair peeking out. Carefully Sanji pushed the blanket aside and stroked with the index finger of his right hand, tenderly over her cheek, a trick that worked most of the time. After only a few minutes, she opened her brown eyes and blinked sleepily at him. Just the sight of her cheeks, still red from sleep, framed by her tousled hair, and the way her little fingers rubbed over her eyes, was enough to bring a smile to his face and make his heart beat faster. Even her curly brows, now covered by a thick fringe, he found simply adorable.   
"Good morning princess," he whispered, but received no reply, but he was used to that by now.  
"Are you hungry? I made a special breakfast today. Come," he said and stood up. As soon as Sessa heard the words breakfast, she was suddenly awake, threw the blanket aside and tripped on her little feet past Sanji to the kitchen. Only when she caught sight of Zoro did she stop, visibly unsure.  
"Come on, I know he seems like the big bad wolf, but you'll see that you really don't have to be afraid of him. Besides, Daddy's still here."  
The words had escaped his lips unconsciously, but he seemed to be the only one who was surprised, because Sessa, now lured by the scent of hot chocolate with marshmallow pieces, ran to her chair and let Sanji help her up.  
At least Zoro had exchanged the beer for a cup of coffee and even put food on all the plates, so that Sessa could start right away. With her cheeks full, she began to munch heartily and picked up one of the stars spread out on the table to look at it. Sanji felt himself inevitably holding his breath as Sessa eyed the little star from all angles, as if it were an elf or some other mythical creature.  
"Stjärna," she said suddenly, and Sanji choked on his Havregrynsgröt** by a hair.   
Hearing her voice was the most beautiful gift she could have given him. He would have loved to dance for joy, for it was progress, albeit small.  
Sessa put the star back, but only to pick up the next one and look at it as she continued to eat while drinking her cocoa. After the meal, to Sanji's amazement, Zoro offered to do the dishes so he could decorate the Christmas tree with Sessa, the only thing he had not done yet because he wanted to wait until Sessa woke up to do it.  
In the living room, Sessa's eyes wandered everywhere, seeming to take in every detail, delighting in the little Christmas angels, the stars, the garlands of lights, the huge Christmas tree, the Advent candles, and the prettily decorated Christmas wreaths that beheld her bright children's eyes. Sanji could only with difficulty suppress tears of joy as she turned to look at him.  
"Come let's decorate the tree," he said, kneeling to the box of tree decorations. Sessa was so excited that she did not want to be helped. Only when she wanted to hang something higher up, she bounced up and down until Sanji finally lifted her. Half an hour later, the tree was also decorated and Sanji explained to Sessa that she only needed to sleep twice more until Santa brought the presents.   
"Shall we sing Christmas carols together so you can join in tomorrow when our guests arrive?" Sanji asked her, hoping she would say yes, but Sessa remained silent, so he took his cell phone, which had stopped warbling in the kitchen by now, presumably because Zoro had turned it off.   
The dishes were obviously done and Zoro returned to his beer, which he was drinking from when Sanji entered the kitchen. Even if he did not know why, he at least knew that Zoro did not particularly like this time of year and would prefer to sleep through it, yet he didn't want him to get drunk all day, after all Sessa was there and even if he had little hope of saying yes, Sanji asked him to join them in singing. Zoro stared at him as if asking him if he was straight and put the neck of the bottle back to his mouth as if Sanji had never asked.  
"Would you rather get drunk all day? What is the big deal about singing a few songs with us? No one minds you singing off-key."  
Zoro put the bottle down loudly, on the counter, and glared angrily at Sanji.  
"With you, it's not even enough to be a street musician!"  
"At least I don't have bats falling dead from the sky, while singing."  
Sanji already thought Zoro was going to crush the bottle with his bare hand, but he just managed to stop himself and pushed past Sanji ungently, who gave the back of his head a smug grin and followed him.  
As was to be expected, Zoro did not hit a single note and only received quizzical looks from Sessa, who was probably wondering how anyone could sing so atonally that the wallpaper would slide off the walls if they could. Unfortunately, Sessa did not want to sing along at all, which could either be because of Zoro's singing or because she was just too shy; in any case, Sanji soon gave up on the experiment and all that could be heard were the singers on Sanji's cell phone. Zoro looked at his watch and announced that he still had something to get, but would not reveal what, and Sanji didn't press him, though he was beginning to wonder if it was a gift or not. Sanji offered to give him a quick ride, but Zoro preferred to go alone and even promised to leave the cell phone on in case he got lost, grabbed his dark green parka with the grey sheepskin lining inside and left the house.  
"You're not going to walk, are you?" Sanji asked skeptically, knowing how good Zoro's sense of direction was.  
"How else? My car is just a pile of junk because of the accident. If I jog there, I'll be back in two hours."  
"And if something happens to you?"  
"What's going to happen to me?! As long as I'm not in a car I can fight back!"  
"You had surgery not too long ago if you remember! No, I am calling Chopper. As far as I know, he is only on call over the holidays. While I would hate to disturb him and Milk, he can help you quickly if you're in physical discomfort and can take care of you."  
"Out of the question!"  
"And why not? Do you have to get a present or something?"  
"No!"  
"Then what's the problem?"  
Zoro thought about it, but he could not think of anything and finally agreed.  
Chopper was not very enthusiastic about leaving Milk again, because he had promised to spend the day with her, but when he heard that the others did not have time and that Zoro planned to walk to town alone, he agreed to come.  
Grumpily, Zoro sat down in the passenger seat and Chopper inquired where Zoro wanted to go. "I have to pick up something I commissioned last year. Forgot I'd ordered it until he called me two days ago and said it was ready and I could pick it up."  
"Why did it take so long?"  
"Because he gets a lot of orders every year, that's why. He had told me at the time that there was no way he was going to finish it this year, but then a customer canceled an order and so he had time for me again."  
"What kind of job is that anyway?"  
"It was supposed to be a Christmas present for the chef, but after everything that happened..."  
"Why? You can still give it to him, can't you?"  
"No way!" Zoro protested, adding angrily, "I did tell him to throw it away or do whatever he wants with it, but that idiot refuses because he's so proud of his work and so can't bring himself to destroy it."  
"What is it?"  
"A Christmas present for the cook," Zoro repeated angrily, and Chopper left it at that. Not wanting to antagonize him, he instead simply drove him to town, where he dropped him off at the nearest corner. Zoro typed the address into his cell phone and grudgingly let the annoying voice guide him to the desired address. Chopper waited in the car thinking about what Zoro might have ordered for Sanji, which would embarrass him, and he blushed because the only thing he could think of was sexy underwear or sex toys and he decided not to ask Zoro about it again. While waiting for Zoro, he talked to Milk on the phone until he heard the car door open and Zoro got in. Empty-handed.  
"Where's the gift?" he inquired as he ended the call.  
"I threw it away. It was inappropriate."  
"Okay," Chopper only replied and started the car to drive Zoro home.  
Since he wanted to get back to Milk as soon as possible, his goodbye with Zoro was appropriately brief. With the house key he opened the door and already heard the voice of the cook that seemed to come from somewhere in the hallway that led to the kitchen.   
"Yes, I'll see you then. I'm looking forward to it," Sanji said and quickly hung up when he saw him coming. Zoro inquired who he had been talking to, but Sanji only replied that he had been talking to an old friend and had arranged to meet her.   
"Who?"   
"You don't know her."   
Zoro had a good sense of when the cook was lying to him, so he had an uneasy feeling that he was not being completely honest with him, and it hurt him. But he had no choice, they were not together anymore and if the cook was seeing someone else, it was none of his business. But that did not mean he did not care if Sanji met with others.  
Zoro went into the kitchen and opened another bottle, drinking it halfway down, and leaned his hips against the kitchen counter, letting his head sink into the back of his neck. The cool beer felt good on his palate, but if he was going to successfully push the thought of the chef and this other person out of his mind, he needed something stronger.  
"Hey, don't drink so much or you'll spoil your appetite for lunch," the cook warned him, taking the beer from his hand.   
"If you promise me a substitute".  
"I have julmust***.   
"No, I want something alcoholic. Do you have red wine there?"  
"Yes, but we will not have it until tonight, and only after Sessa is in bed. I don't want her to see you drunk."  
"I'm going to lie down too, after dinner."  
"Why do you want to get drunk so bad?"  
"Do I have to have a damn reason to drink in my own house?" he yelled at the cook, glancing at the door where the girl stood looking at the, with wide eyes. It annoyed him that they could not even argue in peace anymore without her being in earshot and he decided to take a nap until lunch.  
"Wake me up when lunch is ready!" He shouted over his shoulder to the cook and left the kitchen. 

Annoyed and angry, he flopped down on the bed and put his right hand in his jacket pocket. It was a small, square black box, made of imitation leather, with the store owner's initials engraved on it in gold letters. Since picking up the box, he had not taken a single peek inside and had not intended to, but curiosity finally won out and he flipped open the small box, which contained two gold rings. Zoro reached in, slipped the ring over the ring finger of his left hand, and looked at it. Remembering how he had commissioned it last year, he hastily pulled the ring off his finger and placed it back in the box, which he threw into the drawer of his nightstand in frustration. His best bet was to sell them on or have them melted down and made into something else.  
The nap was short and when the cook woke him, he felt he had only blinked briefly, and his mood was correspondingly bad. Nevertheless, he kept silent and ate the Christmas ham with boiled potatoes and cranberry compote that the cook had prepared, and even if he did not like to admit it, he felt better, even if quite full, which was only since he had eaten most of it, while the cook had only eaten a wafer-thin slice of ham. Even the little girl had eaten more. This time he left it to the cook to do the dishes and retreated to the living room. With a deep belch, he flopped down on the couch and looked for the remote, but could not find it anywhere, so he bent down to look under the coffee table. It was not there either. Zoro was startled when he came back up and the girl was suddenly standing next to him, holding a DVD in one hand and the remote in the other, probably because she wanted to watch it. One look at the cover was enough for him to know that there was no way he would watch it and he shook his head vigorously.  
"Out of the question!" Zoro said and tried to snatch the remote control out of her hand. One thing he had to hand it to her, was that she had the reflexes of a cat as she ducked under his arm and crawled away on all fours in the opposite direction.   
"Will you give me the remote!" Zoro shouted, running after Sessa, who only crawled faster, circling the armchair to hide behind it. At least that is what Zoro thought, but when he reached the armchair, she shot off like a rocket and continued crawling on all fours right between the couch and the end table. Zoro immediately rushed after her, his head turkey red, trying to get a hold of her, but she was like a chicken, slipping away at the last second every time he thought he had her, giggling as if she were taunting him. Zoro became frantic and even started jumping over the furniture to get her. Just as she scrambled along behind the couch, Zoro bent his upper body over the backrest and grabbed Sessa, who burst into hysterical shrieks and pressed the remote tightly against her body. Immediately, Sanji rushed out of the kitchen and into the living room, spreading foam all over the floor that dripped from his gloves, which he always put on when washing dishes.   
"What's going on?" Sanji shouted, seeing Zoro kneeling on the couch with his upper body bent over Sessa, trying to snatch the remote from her. Sessa laughed uproariously and seemed to be enjoying herself as deliciously as Sanji had ever seen her do. Breathing heavily, Zoro rose and ran a hand through his dishevelled hair when he finally had the remote, but Sessa stretched her arms up to him excitedly, her eyes sparkling with delight.  
"Again! Again!" she cried, trying to contain herself with laughter and excitement. 

December 24th, La réveillon de Noël.

This evening was a bit more elaborate than yesterday's, because this time Sanji had invited all his friends and Zeff to celebrate Christmas with them, which he wanted to celebrate in the Swedish French tradition. Unfortunately, Sanji had also had to invite Bartolomeo, after Zoro had been nagging him that otherwise he would spend Christmas alone in front of the TV, and Sanji had grudgingly agreed. Under the Christmas tree, Sanji had set up a nativity scene, with original Santons from Provence, and had every effort to keep Sessa from playing with it.  
Luffy and Law had also come after Sanji had called them and invited them. Even if he had not wanted to, Zoro would never have celebrated Christmas without Luffy, who was clearly happy to see him again, as he exuberantly hugged Sanji and almost smothered him while Law came up behind him.  
"Could you stop smothering our host with your affection?" he moaned, rolling his eyes.  
Luffy laughed and gave Law a kiss on the cheek.  
"I'm afraid he'll be bursting with happiness tonight if this keeps up. He really missed you, Sessa, and Zoro" Law confessed, giving Sanji a "you better not break his heart again" look, which Sanji ignored, because the doorbell was already ringing again.  
His heart almost stopped as he looked into the ugly grimace of a creature with horns and blackened skin staring at him from yellow eyes, baring long pointed teeth.  
"What the hell?" Sanji screamed, inevitably backing away as another figure appeared next to the horned hell-creature, its face obscured by a brightly painted mask.   
"Merry Christmas! Yohohoho!" shouted the horned one, and the figure next to him also audibly shouted "Appi Krismes" in amusement.  
"If you do not take off your masks right now, I will let you starve and freeze to death outside, I swear! Are you going to scare Sessa to death on Christmas of all days?"  
They both apologized and laughingly handed Sanji the masks, which Sanji immediately hid in the closet before Sessa saw them, who was playing peacefully with Marco and Ace's adopted son in the living room. Sanji was glad that despite the age difference between the two, they were getting along well and Sessa had a playmate to distract her from the arrival of Luffy, who walked visibly unsure into the living room where he was warmly welcomed by his adopted brother and brother-in-law. Luffy gulped when he caught sight of Sessa, who was so engrossed in her game that she did not notice him at first. When Sanji joined them, he caught Luffy's gaze, which seemed to be waiting for him to allow him to greet Sessa, but instead of answering, he gently pushed Luffy forward with his hand and the black-haired one knelt in front of the two children, first stroking Kian's thick shock of chocolate-brown hair before turning to Sessa.  
"Hey Sessa," Luffy said, his hand pausing in mid-motion as if considering whether to touch her. At last, Sessa's brown eyes looked up at him and her whole face lit up. Exuberant with joy, she threw herself against his neck and squeezed him so tightly with her little arms that Luffy could hardly breathe. Kian took advantage of the moment to throw himself on his uncle's back and wrap his arms around Luffy's neck from behind, shouting excitedly, "go Uncle Luffy, do the helicopter!"   
"Ok, hold on tight you two," Luffy said, stretching out his arms and starting to spin around. At the sight of the shrieking children whirling wildly through the air, Sanji felt queasy, but Ace gently squeezed his shoulder and assured him not to worry.  
"That's Kian's favourite game, that Luffy always has to play with him when he visits us," Marco explained, shaking his head with a smile at the sight of the three exuberant children.  
The human merry-go-round spun faster and faster until it suddenly slowed down and Luffy, exhausted and struggling for breath, dropped onto his butt, much to the disappointment of the children, who would have loved to keep spinning.  
"Go on, go on!" Kian demanded, but Luffy just shook his head. "Give me a little break to... catch my breath..." he panted, smiling at Sessa, who looked up at him with bright eyes and placed her little hands on his cheeks. The black-haired one's brown eyes grew huge as her little lips touched his mouth and his cheeks turned red as she finally detached herself from him and nestled her face against his chest as if he were her very favourite teddy bear. By now, everyone had gathered in the living room, lured by the happy children's laughter, and looked at least as surprised as Luffy, who turned his head to Sanji and looked at him in panic.  
"I... I am sorry, Sanji... I... I..." Luffy stammered, trying to explain the situation to him.  
"It's okay, Luffy, there's no need to apologize. The main thing is that Sessa is happy. And so are you..." Sanji said, trying not to let on that the sight still pained him, for he wished Sessa could love him as much as she obviously loved Luffy. Still, he was happy to see them both so happy, to see his daughter so exuberant was just incredibly beautiful and more than he had dared to hope for.  
After Luffy had recovered, everyone went to the middle of the living room, where Sanji, for lack of space and because Zeff, had been cooking diligently with him in the kitchen since the early morning hours, had set up a large Julbord****, from which everyone could help themselves. Everyone's mouth watered when they discovered the delicious dishes: on the one hand they found the Swedish cuisine, which consisted of marinated herring, potatoes, meatballs, various types of sausage, red cabbage, ribs, pork aspic, Janssons frestelse, lutefisk, saffranskakor, cheese, bread, julskinska, as well as non-alcoholic Glögg, made of almonds and berries, as well as the French cuisine which consisted of champagne, Canapés with foie gras and smoked salmon, oysters, scallops, fish terrine and dinde aux marrons***** and eagerly served themselves before taking their seats at the long rectangular table that stood in front of the buffet and that Zeff had transported from the baratié to here with Zoro, Bartolomeo, Marco and Ace.  
The mood was boisterous and joyful and everyone was having a great time and were in such a jolly mood that they all even got carried away singing along to Christmas songs like Petit Papa Noël, Vive le Vent, Mon Beau Sapin, Nu är det jul igen, Räven raska över isen, Hej, tomtegubbar, Tre Pepparkaksgubbar, Det strålar en stjärna, När juldagsmorgon glimmar, as well as Staffan var en stalledräng, although most only sang along with the choruses or limited themselves to humming along as they had difficulty with pronunciation. Zoro stood out from the crowd with his deep, crooked voice and was laughed at by Luffy and Ussop because of it, until it became too much for the green-haired man and he tucked their heads under his armpits and squeezed them until they begged for mercy.  
"Well, don't be like that Zoro, you have to admit that your singing is just too funny" Luffy said, holding a sprig of mistletoe in front of Zoro's nose to make up, as Sanji appeared next to Luffy and held out a glass of Glögg to him.  
"Here drink this and be peaceful" Sanji said, pushing the glass into Luffy's hand, but Luffy held the mistletoe right between Sanji's and Zoro's heads, waving it back and forth with a grin.  
"Not until you kiss," Luffy said, his grin widening even more. Sanji and Zoro both blushed, and Sanji angrily tried to snatch the mistletoe from Luffy's hand, but Luffy evaded him by running backwards away from him, holding the mistletoe right in Sanji's nose. The cook grew increasingly angry the more he missed, until he decided to snatch the mistletoe from Luffy with both hands, running right into Luffy's outstretched arms. His voice was barely more than a whisper as he pulled Sanji close, kissed him on the cheek, and squeezed him so tightly that Sanji could barely breathe. "You wouldn't believe how much it means to me to be able to celebrate Christmas with you. I love you and Sessa so much and I'll do anything you ask, just don't shut me out of your lives again," Luffy whispered in Sanji's ear in a raspy voice and squeezed him even tighter.

December 25th, Christmas Eve, at Franky's.

The last Christmas Eve took place at Franky's place, who lived on two floors in a former factory building in the industrial area. Even from a distance, his apartment could be recognized, because the entire building was decorated from top to bottom with fairy lights, and on the roof, Franky had set up what was probably the largest illuminated nativity scene in the city, which made even the streetlights in the surrounding area pale in comparison and were probably mistaken for a landing plan by all the planes that flew over the building. Sanji wondered if Franky had negotiated a special deal with the local power company, or if he was simply illegally tapping electricity from his neighbours who lived below him, as he walked with Zoro and Sessa up the staircase lit by thousands of tiny bulbs that snaked around the railing on black garlands. Christmas carols in a variety of languages reached his ears from everywhere, accompanied by merry laughter and thumping feet moving to the beat of the music. Franky's house was the liveliest he knew, there was always something going on and his neighbours never sat still, which would be an unacceptable for Sanji, but Franky loved this commotion, the liveliness and passion of his neighbours, the different cultures that met here and with whom he maintained a lively contact, because he lived alone in his apartment. Only from time to time he was visited by the twins Mozu and Kiwi with whom he had an open triangle relationship, who were also present tonight and had probably helped him to spruce up his apartment for his guests, since Franky had neither the time nor the inclination to do this himself. When they finally reached the last floor of the house, Sanji was a bit out of breath and pressed the bell button, panting, whereupon the door opened and Franky stood before them with a broad grin, hugging all three of them to his strong chest and taking the bags of gifts from them. Inside Sanji was greeted by flashing strings of coloured lights, garlands of moss, and glowing Christmas figures that shone so brightly and flashed in all sorts of colours that he had to close his eyes when he saw them, for fear of suffering an epileptic seizure if he looked too long at them.  
Franky laughed and led his friends down the long hallway into the open living area, where the others had made themselves comfortable on his four-foot-long corner couch and were already toasting while a football game played across the TV screen. The smokers among the guests had made themselves comfortable outside in the cold on the fire escape and were smoking. At the sight of the glowing cigarettes, Sanji felt like smoking one himself, but he did not want to leave Sessa alone among all the people, so he just let his eyes wander around the room.  
Kidd was sitting between his two friends Bonney and Perona, talking to Chopper and Law, who was watching Luffy and Kian play, Jimbei and Brook were sitting at the bar toasting each other with champagne glasses, Marco had made himself comfortable with Ace in an armchair in a corner of the room and was cuddling with him, and Carrot and her girlfriend Wanda were laughing and feeding each other snacks. Only Ussop and Robin were missing, much to Sanji's disappointment, who had hoped they would come, since Robin had already been unable to come yesterday for work reasons, so Ussop had shown up alone.  
"Aren't Ussop and Robin coming?" he inquired of Franky, barely concealing his disappointment.  
"Yes, they are, they're just running a little late. They haven't seen each other for a few days now, so the longing must have been very great," Franky said, winking meaningfully at Sanji. The cook could imagine that very well, he probably would not feel any different and led Sessa by the hand to the others. Zoro stayed next to Franky and watched the hustle and bustle silently.  
"How are things with you and Sanji, anyway?" Franky asked, who had already heard from Chopper that the two were just friends now, and trustingly put his arm around the green-haired man's back, who just shrugged.  
"Pretty good, I guess. We'll try to make the best of the situation."  
"And you think just being friends with him will work out?"  
"Why not? Or do you think we can't keep our hands off each other?" Zoro asked, visibly irritated, turning to face the door as the doorbell rang again. Franky went to the door and his face lit up as he saw Ussop and Robin, whose heads were peeking out from behind a mountain of presents, wishing him Merry Christmas. Franky returned the greeting and after he took the presents and then the coats, he led them to the others.   
"Hey Zoro! Let me introduce you to Robin. You haven't had a chance to meet yet," Ussop said, looking encouragingly at his girlfriend, who was still standing in the hallway staring at Zoro, who returned the look.  
Franky's gaze, like Ussop's, wandered intently back and forth between the two, who were acting very strangely. The green-haired man's body suddenly seemed tense, and Franky even though he saw that the mooshead's arms, folded in front of his chest, trembled ever so slightly and barely noticeably, and his eyes looked fixedly into Robin's.  
It was obvious that the two knew each other, but the reunion was not a pleasant one, at least not for Zoro, who did not move when Robin broke the silence.  
"Hello Zoro," was all she said, and with Ussop giving Franky a puzzled look, she walked past Zoro to greet the others.   
"What was that all about?" Franky asked, addressing the green-haired man, but Zoro ignored him and now headed for the bar to keep Brook and Jimbei company. Franky shook his head regretfully as he watched Zoro grab a bottle from the shelf behind the bar, opened it and took a hearty swig, running his sleeve over his mouth. This was going to be fun if Zoro planned to shoot himself tonight, Franky thought, and decided to give Sanji a heads-up, who immediately cast a disapproving look in Zoro's direction. The cook did nothing, however, but merely watched Zoro, who did not take the bottle out of his hand even during dinner and the gift-giving, but kept sipping it and furtively squinting at Robin, who was talking with Carrot and Wanda at the other end of the room. Fortunately, everyone was so cheerful and talking animatedly among themselves that they did not notice Zoro, who was hiding behind Franky's burly figure so he could drink undisturbed. Except for Sanji, who watched disapprovingly as the bottle grew emptier and Zoro became more and more pensive. He didn't even participate in the singing but sat on a bar stool at the counter and had opened the second bottle in the meantime, when Sanji suddenly appeared next to him and grabbed the bottle with his fingers, just above Zoro's own, and tried to snatch it from him. The blond's eyes reflected the same contempt and anger that Zoro himself felt, and he turned his head away to avoid looking at the cook any longer.  
"Temper, the evening is just beginning, and I don´t want you to throw up in my car later," Sanji said, trying to snatch the bottle from Zoro.  
"I'll walk then," Zoro growled, pulling the bottle back towards him. Everyone in the room, except for the children, did not miss the tension between the two, which made the air crackle and clearly changed the mood in the room, which grew more intense with each passing second. Only Luffy did not seem to notice any of this, as he was too busy stuffing his belly, and when he finally leaned back in satisfaction, it was his voice that broke the silence and brought everyone present back to reality.  
"Man, am I full. That was delicious! When are there going to be presents?" he inquired, squinting longingly over at the packages Franky had all placed under the 9´8 inches high Christmas tree.  
"Great idea Luffy!" Franky agreed, gently pushing Sessa and Kieran over to the packages so they and Luffy could unwrap their presents first. Luffy was the first to tear open a large package with dark blue paper and gold ribbon, and when he saw the content, his eyes nearly fell out and he even forgot to breathe in awe as he turned the gift in his hands with trembling fingers.  
"Is this from the Germa 66 special edition? The one of which there are only about 500?" Luffy asked superfluously, because he knew it was, and looked at his friends one by one, but all of them seemed as stunned as he was.  
It was a figurine presenting the entire Germa 66 squad, all standing in their battle poses around their leader Judge. Luffy ran into the bathroom, the only room that was not lit, and closed the door behind him, looking at the detailed figures that glowed fluorescently in the darkness. No doubt it was from the original special edition.  
"Oh man, I don't believe it!!! I am... I am completely freaking out!!!! he screamed, laughing, and shaking all over with excitement and enthusiasm. Franky knocked anxiously on the bathroom door and asked if everything was all right.  
"Yeah...I'm...just overwhelmed...this is the coolest gift I've ever received..." Luffy whispered in awe, pressing the gift to him like a treasure. When he left the bathroom 15 minutes later, the others had already gathered around and were looking at him with a mixture of concern and curiosity.  
"Which one of you gave me this?" he asked, but no one knew.  
"Ok, then I'll just hug each one of you" Luffy decided, and followed through consistently, whether the person wanted him to or not. After hugging the kids as well, the gift-giving could continue, with Luffy watching each of his friends closely for a clue to the noble donor, but no one was acting any differently than usual, except for Zoro, who was leaning against the bar with his arms crossed and Sanji standing right next to him, making sure Zoro did not drink any more alcohol for the rest of the evening. Sessa was happy about Luffy's present and kept pressing the play button, which let Ruffy's voice sound and strained Sanji's nerves, which were already tense due to Zoro's behaviour. When they were almost done with the presents, the doorbell rang again. Franky went to see who it was, but when he still had not returned after a few minutes, Sanji followed him to make sure everything was okay.  
His heart almost stopped when he saw who had come.  
"Vi...Vi..."  
"Yeah, it's me. Can I come in? This costume isn't very warm." She turned to Franky, who was still frozen because he could not believe she was really standing in front of them. The chef approached them both as if he had to convince himself that Vivi really was not an optical illusion, but when he finally stood in front of her, it was clear to him that it was her in the flesh.  
"Vivi..." whispered Sanji, wrapping his trembling arms around her and holding her close as little tears of happiness ran down his cheeks. Vivi returned the embrace and gently stroked his back.  
"Hey, hey, stop it or I'll start crying too."  
At the sight of his friends, Franky's own tears came, and he put his strong arms around his two friends and sniffled into Sanji's blond hair. In the meantime, little by little, the others were also arriving in the entrance area, for Franky's and Sanji's loud sobs had not escaped them, and when they caught sight of Vivi, they all rushed to hug her, wanting to know from her why she had already returned.  
Vivi explained to them that thanks to the excellent medical care Kohza had received, he was fit for transport much sooner than expected and so they could finally fly home.  
Unfortunately, his condition did not allow him to leave the hospital yet, but at least they could visit him.   
"If we had known you were coming, we would have gotten you presents, too," Carrot said sadly, but Vivi was not angry about it at all, quite the opposite.  
"It doesn't matter, I've already received the biggest gifts this year: that I have Kohza back in good health and that I'm back home with my friends."  
"But how did you know we would be here today?" Sanji asked curiously, and Vivi blushed.  
"Well, Zoro told me you'd be here," she confessed, and Sanji glanced over his shoulder at Zoro to make sure he was not drinking again, but fortunately for him, he was not, instead leaning against a wall with his arms folded in front of his chest and piercing Sanji with his gaze. He did not care if he was still mad at him for taking the alcohol away or if he had been watching beside him the whole time like a chaperone to make sure he did not keep drinking.  
They spent the rest of the evening watching the football game on TV and talking while drinking until Sessa rubbed her eyes and Sanji drove her and Zoro home.

Throughout the ride, the mosshead was tight-lipped and did not speak a word to Sanji. When they got home, he grabbed the six-pack of beer from the fridge and disappeared upstairs with it, slamming the upstairs bedroom door behind him. Sanji decided to leave him alone and took care of Sessa, who was already grumpy from fatigue. He then lay down on the couch and tried to sleep, but somehow, he just could not get any rest and decided to turn on the TV in frustration as it got to 10 p.m., then 11 p.m., and finally midnight before his eyes fell shut and he nodded off. But it was not long before he opened his eyes again, startled, and pulled up and listened. Was that a whimper he was hearing? But where was it coming from? Sanji got up and went to Sessa's room first, but everything was quiet there, so Sanji returned to the living room, where he heard that eerie whimpering again, which gave him goosebumps. With his heart pounding, he went upstairs. The whimpering grew louder and more distinct as he slowly climbed the stairs. It seemed to come from the bedroom and a cold shiver slowly crept up the back of his neck. Was that.... Zoro?  
Sanji opened the door and what he saw froze his blood.  
Zoro was lying on the bed, his arms stretched out and his fingers clawing at the air as if desperately trying to hold onto something, muttering the same words over and over.  
"I want to get out! I want to get out!" he whimpered, not noticing Sanji slowly getting down on his knees beside the bed and trying to soothe him.  
"Shhh, it's all right, Zoro. I'm with you," Sanji assured him, but Zoro just couldn't seem to escape the nightmare he was trapped in, and Sanji felt helpless, having never seen Zoro like this before. His hands tenderly touched Zoro's cheeks when he could not help himself and stroked his thumbs over his cheeks. His voice was tender and concerned as he soothed Zoro, who slowly calmed down and even lowered his arms.  
"That's it, calm down. Everything's fine, you're home, safe," he whispered, and as his right hand gently stroked the moss´s head, Zoro slowly opened his eyes.  
"What's going on? What... are you doing here?” Zoro asked, looking visibly confused.  
"You had a nightmare. You must have dreamed you were buried alive..." replied Sanji, not realizing that he was still lovingly stroking Zoro's hair and that his left hand was on Zoro's cheek. The green-haired man was drenched in sweat and his chest was still moving frantically, but at least he was awake again and had calmed down a bit.   
"Do you often have these nightmares?"  
"Every now and then," Zoro confessed, pushing Sanji's hands away to straighten his upper body.  
Sanji was shocked and annoyed at the same time because Zoro had not said anything, but he knew that Zoro did not like to talk about such things because he realized that Sanji would only worry. And because he would say things Zoro did not want to hear, like the sentence Sanji said next:  
"maybe you should talk to someone about this."  
"About what? My dreams? They're just nightmares, that's all."  
"It's more than that, Zoro. You are obviously having trouble processing all of this. You need help."  
"No!" Zoro almost shouted, running his hand through his wet hair.   
"I'm fine, okay? Do not worry about me. And don't you dare tell Chopper or anyone about this!" Zoro warned him and headed for the bathroom without another word. 

*mulled wine  
**an oatmeal porridge prepared with water and a little salt. The rather viscous porridge is boiled briefly, poured into a bowl, and then a little cold milk is poured over it so that it is ready to eat. To top it off, a spoonful of raspberry or cranberry jam is usually added to the porridge.  
*** is a lemonade drink sold mainly in Sweden. It is like the malt beer known in Germany and contains 30 other ingredients in addition to hops and malt. As Julmust (from Swedish: jul - Christmas) it is offered at the end of the year. During Easter, it is called Påskmust (from Swedish: påsk - Easter) and during the rest of the year it is called must.  
****Christmas buffet   
*****Turkey with chestnuts


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year everyone!  
> I am very happy to be able to present you chapter 26 this early. Unfortunately the next chapter will take longer, because there are other things I will have to take care of first. I´m very sorry! :(  
> But in the meantime you have this chapter.  
> Thank you all for your support and kudos, especially to sooozyj and mulletzoro with their encouraging and heart-warming comments.  
> Have a great 2021full of love and joy!  
> Take care of you!

After the events of the previous night, neither Sanji nor Zoro had slept well and sat accordingly monosyllabic at the breakfast table the next morning. Furtively, Sanji kept glancing over his coffee cup at Zoro, who could barely keep his head up whose face almost sank into the cereal bowl. Since last night, they had not exchanged a word with each other, but had only lain silently in bed, the first night since their break-up, and yet neither of them had been able to sleep. After Zoro's nightmare, Sanji had not wanted to leave him alone, and although Zoro had protested, Sanji had refused to leave, and the mosshead had finally turned on his side and ignored him. The moss had tossed and turned restlessly, almost driving the blond mad with it, yet Sanji had said nothing, simply looking at the green-haired man's broad back and waiting for him to turn and talk to him about what he had experienced. Why he had been so cold to him and wanted to get drunk. But the mosshead remained stubbornly silent, and Sanji felt left out. Even though they were no longer together, they were still supposedly friends. And friends told each other when something was bothering them, so why did he prefer to keep it all bottled up? Did he trust him that little?  
Sanji felt farther away from Zoro than ever before; it was as if there was an invisible gulf between them that he simply could not cross, and that was drifting them further and further apart with each passing inch, widening the gap between them. If they were not careful, they would become more and more estranged and Sanji did not like that at all, so he decided to at least solve the mystery surrounding Zoro and Robin and find out how they knew each other.  
When Zoro went to visit Johnny at the hospital in the afternoon, Sanji drove him and then went by Ussop's house with Sessa after learning that Robin was with him.   
She was beautiful as always, even in those lilac silk pants, with the white spaghetti strap top, the thick black nickel glasses, and the high bun from which a few strands of hair hung casually. She had obviously decided to do home office, because there were papers on the side table and her laptop was on her lap, from which she looked up when Sanji entered the room. He asked Ussop to let him take Sessa to his bedroom to play undisturbed, because he did not want Sessa to know anything about their conversation. The black-haired nodded and Sanji led his daughter into the next room and placed, the baby monitor that he had brought with him, so that he could hear her and promised her that it would not take long and that he would be next door. Sessa did not seem worried at all and played with her stuffed dog and Sanji left the room and turned on the other baby monitor device before sitting down on the armchair in the living room.  
Somewhat embarrassed, he lowered his eyes as he explained the reason for coming and looked at Robin. The black-haired woman spoke very slowly, seeming to choose her words carefully.  
"Zoro and I know each other from before, when we lived in the same neighbourhood for a while."  
"When?"  
Robin lapsed into long silence again, seeming to consider how much she should reveal to him.  
Something had happened between them, or she would not be pressing around like this, that much was certain to him, and though Robin did not seem to want to talk about it, she finally began to tell, though not much.  
"I was about 17 when I met Zoro. He was a quiet, withdrawn boy who roamed around a lot and usually did not return home until well after dark, even on school days. His mother was a housewife and his father...well, he was a very temperamental..."  
"Wait a minute, stop," Sanji interrupted her, raising his hand. His face reflected confusion and suspicion, as it worked in his mind. As far as he knew from Ussop, Robin was nine years older than he and Zoro, which must have made him eight at the time. But this was impossible, because Zoro had told him at the very beginning of their relationship that he had been raised in an orphanage since he had been a toddler, just like Sanji. One of them was lying, but he could not quite believe that Robin would lie to him, at least he did not know why she would lie to him. So Zoro was the one lying, the question was why. Sanji ran his hand through his hair. He wondered what else Zoro was hiding from him if he was hiding some other things from him. Why he was not honest about his childhood, why he would not tell him, why he was so dismissive of Robin. But most of all, why he had never confided in him even though they had been a couple for 7 years. The more he thought about these things, the heavier his head became, sinking further and further forward until it hung between his sagging shoulders.  
His voice was almost an indistinct murmur.  
"Why is Zoro mad at you?"  
"I don't think he feels anger at me directly, but more at what he associates with me, because I felt the same way. When I saw him again, immediately the memories of that time came back. We both came from poor backgrounds and the area where we lived was not a nice place, especially for children. But how could we escape? I managed to find a job when I was eighteen to pay for my studies and slowly build up a company through hard work, but Zoro..."   
Robin faltered, suddenly unable to look at Sanji, who had moved forward in his seat and was now literally glued to her lips. She could tell by his reaction that he did not seem to know anything and her decision to tell him wavered. There were things in life that one could not simply tell others, at least not when it was about the affairs of others. Maybe she should not have said anything, but she liked Sanji and knew that he was worried about Zoro. Still... she could not bring herself to tell him everything.  
Robin looked down at her hands, which were outstretched on her thighs.  
"I think it's better if Zoro tells you the rest, because I only know the whole story by hearsay, so I can't tell you what's true and what's not. I hope you understand," she said, silently asking Sanji to forgive her.  
Sanji sighed, but he had to admit that Robin was right and decided not to press her further. He offered to cook for her and Ussop, but they both declined with thanks, because Robin had to go to her company later and Ussop had an appointment with his publisher about the new book he was working on, so Sanji went to Ussop's bedroom, where Sessa was playing peacefully with her stuffed dog.  
"Come Sessa, we're going back home," he said, leading Sessa outside by the hand. 

When they arrived home, Zoro was not yet back and had not called for Sanji to pick him up, and the cook again had that uneasy feeling that had been building up in him ever since Zoro had been kidnapped. He knew from Corby that those responsible for the kidnapping had been caught and with the help of the secret service, even the connection to the found money could be proven, but he was still afraid that they could take revenge on him or his family. He quickly dialled Zoro's number and breathed relieved when he answered with a growl.   
"Are you done with your visit?"  
"No, not yet!"  
"Then hurry up, I'll be there in half an hour to pick you up. Have a nurse take you to the exit, or no, better yet, wait in your colleague's room. How is he doing, by the way?" added Sanji quickly, who had almost forgotten why Zoro had gone to the hospital.  
"Unchanged. See you soon!" said Zoro and hung up.  
Since it took him 15 minutes to get to the hospital, he grabbed Sessa, who still had her shoes on, and headed out. Unfortunately, Zoro had not complied with Sanji's request and had already left the room before he arrived. The blond cursed inwardly as he used his app to locate Zoro’s mobile phone, hoping that he had turned it on. Sometimes he was worse than a toddler, at least worse than Sessa, who at least let him lead her by the hand dutifully.   
"I'll kill him, I'll kill him, I'll... hey, Zoro, where are you running to! Didn't we agree that you'd wait for me in the room?" Sanji yelled at him when he finally found him, thrusting his, warm breath directly into Zoro's face, who was about to jump right into Sanji's face.   
He hated it when the cook breathed on him and treated him like a little kid in public. A nurse walking past them just grinned, obviously amused by the conversation between the two.  
"You want me to pee in the middle of the hallway?"  
"Of course not, but if you're going to the bathroom, go that way!"  
Sanji pointed with an outstretched arm in the opposite direction Zoro had gone. The green-haired man crossed his arms in front of his chest.  
"So what? How am I supposed to know, I just started walking."  
"It's written big and wide over the door! Do you still want me to spell it out for you?"  
Zoro's face then turned deep red and his eyes burned murderously as he was about to wring his neck. The cook, however, ignored the looks of his ex and dragged Zoro by the sleeve of his jacket and Sessa by the hand to the exit. His steps were so fast that Sessa had trouble keeping up, unlike Zoro, who had just overtaken Sanji and was now pulling him along behind him, but only until the blond chef caught up with him again. So, it went back and forth, sometimes Zoro pulled him behind him and sometimes Sanji, until they finally stood in the parking lot in front of the car. Zoro circled the car and muttered a "next time I'll take a cab!" before sitting down in the passenger´s seat. When Sanji had gently placed his daughter in her child seat, he raised his index finger to his temple and circled it clockwise next to his head to signal to Sessa that Zoro was out of his mind, who was glaring at him through the side mirror.  
"You know I can see you through the side mirror!" Zoro hissed menacingly, through the rolled-down window, but Sanji just shrugged, closed the rear door, circled the car and got behind the steering wheel.   
Before driving off, Sanji turned to Zoro again and let his finger circle next to his temple, whereupon the moss head growled between clenched teeth, "Wait until we get home!" They both flinched as soon as Zoro uttered the words, and Sanji hastily put the key in the lock and drove off. Throughout the drive, they did not speak to each other, and Sanji tried not to think about the meaning behind Zoro's last words, which evoked all too familiar images in his mind. The green haired liked to use that phrase to warn Sanji that as soon as they had the chance, he would fuck him raw as soon as they got home. Sanji was sure that Zoro was thinking back to that time as well, because the green-haired man seemed just as embarrassed as Sanji but hid that fact by staring persistently out the side window, which was fine with Sanji, because that way he couldn't see his glowing cheeks. They were almost halfway there when Sanji's cell phone rang and he turned on his speakerphone so he could talk on the phone while driving. It was the old man and he sounded stressed.  
"Listen, you have to come to the restaurant. Patty and Carne must have upset their stomachs over the holidays and are sick and all hell is breaking loose here at the restaurant. I wouldn't ask you if..."  
"It's okay. I just need to find someone who takes care for Sessa."  
Sanji hung up and started calling each of his friends, but either they were not answering their cell phones, or they were busy elsewhere. Even Luffy could not because he was in bed with a fever after spending half the night at the open window watching shooting stars that were supposed to be buzzing across the sky on Christmas. Sanji wished him a fast recovery and hung up. What was he supposed to do now? Take Sessa to the restaurant? Leave her in the care of a strange babysitter? But where was he going to find one in a hurry?   
"Go, I'll stay with the little witch."  
Sanji's eyes scrutinized Zoro over the rear-view mirror as he pondered the offer. He was not comfortable leaving her with him, but what choice did he have? With a heavy heart, he dropped them both off at home, but not without saying goodbye to Sessa and assuring her that he would be back with her as soon as possible.  
"Be nice and listen to Zoro while I'm gone, okay? And do not bother him with the remote again, understood?"  
Sessa looked up at him with her big brown eyes and nodded. Sanji smiled and stroked her bangs back with his hand. His lips brushed her forehead fleetingly but gently, leaving her with a heavy heart and a queasy feeling with the green-haired curmudgeon.

Zoro was far from thrilled at the prospect of being alone with the little girl, but he had said yes now and had to try to make the best of the situation and hope that the cook was back soon, because he did not feel like changing her diapers. Maybe this was the opportunity to get her used to the potty, she was old enough after all. But the thought alone disgusted him, and he fervently hoped to be spared.  
She eyed him with wide eyes, inevitably reminding him of Nami, who had the exact same look when she wanted something from him, and he sighed.  
"Okay, look, I'll let you watch TV until the curly haired one comes back. For all I care, you can watch that show you like if you promise to shut up in return. Do we have a deal?"  
Zoro expected an answer, but when none came, he sighed again and went to the TV to insert the Blu-Ray CD. As soon as the title melody sounded, Sessa ran towards the TV and dropped on her butt right in front of it, staring spellbound at the flickering screen where the chef, in his disguise, appeared and kicked some villains' asses. Since Zoro had nothing better to do, he settled down on the couch and watched along. They watched TV all afternoon, eating the leftovers from Christmas, until Zoro's eyes eventually fell shut, because he did not care for superheroes and all that nonsense, and so he nodded off and slept until a foul stench hit his nostrils.  
"What is that beastly stench? Don´t tell me it´s you!" he exclaimed in disgust, holding his nose. Sessa nodded meekly. He wanted to wait until the cook was back, but this stench was almost unbearable. With both hands he grabbed Sessa and, holding her at arm's length from him, carried her swiftly up the stairs to the second-floor bathroom.   
Sessa whined and refused to be undressed, but Zoro persisted and took off one piece of clothing after another until she was wearing only her diaper. Zoro took a deep breath and carefully opened the diaper with his fingertips. His face turned almost as green as his hair as he removed the stinky culprit and tossed it into the trash can, which he sprayed with a generous amount of room spray in hopes of masking the smell.  
"Okay, stinky, I'm going to shower you off with the shower head, so just hold still, okay?" he said, turning the water on lukewarm. Sessa did not seem to like that at all, she tried to block the water jet with her hands, which hit Zoro instead and made him wet.   
"Damn it, keep still, how else am I going to clean you up?" he yelled and turned around so he could clean her bottom, but Sessa seemed to be having fun with the new game all the sudden and was jumping up and down in the bathtub shrieking and squealing. The water splashed everywhere but where it should and Zoro's patience thread was getting thinner and thinner until he snapped and grabbed her. His anger became so great that he could no longer stop himself in his rage and he let his hand sink down in the middle of Sessa's bare bottom, so hard that Sessa cried out whimpering. Immediately Zoro put her down, already sorry for his sudden outburst, but Sessa did not want to hear his apology, but climbed out of the bathtub and ran, stark naked through the hallway. Zoro could still hear her little feet running down the stairs and wanted to hurry after her, when suddenly the light went out and Zoro stood alone in the dark bathroom.

In the Baratié it had also become dark all at once. Sanji immediately went to the fuse box to turn the fuses back on, but when that did not help either, he did not know what to do and returned to the others, perplexed. Through the windows in the kitchen, he had a good view of the street outside, which was also dark, as if someone had simply turned off all the lights in town. Apparently there had been a power outage all over town.  
Today, of all days when he had left Sessa alone with Zoro. Sanji asked Zeff to let him go home to check on things. Zeff had no objections, understanding Sanji's concern all too well.  
The cook grabbed his things and drove home through the dark streets as fast as he could.

Sessa was terrified. Everything was suddenly dark, and she was all alone. Alone with the sinister man who was somewhere upstairs. She was still angry with him because he had slapped her on the bottom, which still hurt from the blow. She had never been beaten before, and the shock of it was so deep that Sessa, afraid of Zoro, had crawled under the stairs, sobbing quietly to herself.  
She could not even find her beloved stuffed dog in the darkness, which she now sorely missed. If at least Mommy was here, or Luffy, or....  
"Daddy," Sessa sobbed and curled up on the floor. Her body shivered with cold and fear.  
He had said he would be back soon, but he still had not returned, even though it was already dark. Sessa wept bitterly, for she was afraid. Of the eerie darkness that surrounded her, of the loneliness and of the fact that Daddy had also left her, just like Mom. She missed her very much, the sound of her voice, her scent, how nice it had felt when she had taken her in her arms. Dayy had told her that she had been sick and had died, but Sessa did not understand what that meant. Only that you could not see the person again.  
But why had Mommy just left? Didn't she love her anymore? Had she done something bad that had upset Mommy?   
"Come back mommy... daddy... Sessa be nice..." Sessa pleaded and looked at the window that suddenly brightened and heard an engine. Daddy's car. Immediately Sessa straightened up and looked at the door. Something jingled and a moment later, she saw a bright light dancing wildly around the room and Daddy's voice calling out to her. She was so relieved that he had not left her after all, that she got up and ran toward him. When he saw her, he sank to his knees in relief.  
"Daddy... Daddy..." she sobbed, clinging to him in tears. His cheek was scratchy, his skin was wet, and he stank of that weird water he always sprayed on his skin, but she did not care, she was glad to have him back.  
"What are you doing here naked? Where's Zoro?" he asked worriedly, whereupon Sessa pressed herself even tighter against him and snuggled up her face against his chest.  
"Don't go again… Daddy”  
His hands trembled and his body shook as he gently pulled her onto his lap and stroked the back of her head with his fingers.  
"I promise princess. Everything is going to be okay; do you hear me? Da...dy...is back."  
Very gently, he kissed her head and rocked her back and forth in his arms, while he assured her that he would not leave her.  
"I love you baby; I love you more than anything" he whispered into her hair and wrapped his coat around her small body so she would not freeze.


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone!
> 
> I´m very sorry for the long wait, but I didn´t have much time for writing, so it took me a while. But I will make up for the wait. As always thank you all for your support and a special thank you to RoyaleStar and sooozyj for your sweet comments!#  
> It is a short chapter, but I hope you like it.  
> See you soon!

As quietly as he could, he turned the key in the door lock and squeezed his way inside through the narrow crack in the apartment door. His clothes were soaked by the rain and stuck to his shivering body, yet he did not even dare to breathe, let alone chatter his teeth, as he stood in the living room with the faint glow of the television falling on his pale face, which was currently playing some old western. He could not see his father because the armchair was right in front of the TV, but he suspected that he was already asleep, as he so often did when he came home late at night. He carefully slipped off his shoes, took off his socks and crept barefoot into his room, which was adjacent to the living room. He flinched briefly as the door creaked open and quickly disappeared inside his room before his father awoke.  
Although the room was dark, thanks to the streetlight that stood outside the window, he made out the shadowy outline of a figure sitting on his bed, staring at him.  
His heart raced and his whole body tensed as he heard his father's menacing voice, dripping with anger and annoyance.  
"Where have you been? You knew Child Care Services was coming today. Do you know the trouble I have been in because of you? You're lucky they bought my story that you were studying at a friend's house for school and that's why you forgot the appointment."  
Exhausted, he lowered his head onto his forearms and clutched it with his hands as if he needed to hold it in place.  
"As if I don't have it hard enough with all the overtime, I have to work every day to keep us both fed."  
"Then why don't you just hand me off?"  
"You know I can't. I promised your mother before she died. And whether we like it or not, we have to get along somehow."  
"But I don't want to! All the time you have to work, and when you're not working, you're drinking and sleeping!" he shouted, at which his father stood up.   
"Do you think I enjoy having to work all the time? Don't you think I would much rather go out sometimes, meet with others, have fun? Instead, I must work day and night, and what do I get in return? Reproaches from my ungrateful son! I'm so sick of it!"  
"Then give me away! I do not want to live with you anymore anyway! I'm sick of your tantrums!"  
Suddenly his father grabbed him by the upper arms and bent down dangerously close to him. Disgusted, he turned his head away, for his father's breath reeked of alcohol and his eyes were red.  
"There's nothing I'd rather do, believe me, but that's not how life works. You have to take responsibility for what you do, you'll learn that soon enough. But first I will teach you obedience."  
He suspected what his father meant by this and braced himself with all his might against him, but his father held him by the arm and pulled him mercilessly behind him. As best as he could, he fought back by dropping onto his butt, but his father kept tugging him up by his arm and holding him up so high that his feet hovered just above the ground. With the courage of desperation, he clung to the doorframe of the bathroom door and screamed at his father to let him go, but he grabbed him by the waist with both arms and tugged at his son like a maniac until he finally released him. His lips quivered as he watched his father turn on the faucet and push the plug down the drain and started to scream and kick wildly.  
"Stop it, you're only making it worse!" his father warned him, pushing his head down until it was inches from the sink. Panicking, he cried, 2wand tears streamed down his face as his head was finally pushed into the water. 

Zoro clasped his hands over his face and threw his torso back and forth screaming as if reliving the memory of that time and would not calm down even when he felt an arm on his shoulder which he slapped away. The arm did not come back, instead he heard a voice, soft and deep, speaking to him and finally he managed to escape the nightmare he was trapped in and gazed into the cook´s face who was shining a flashlight at him.  
"Hey, it's all right... Zoro, it's all right," he said, approaching him slowly, but Zoro just could not bear the pity in his gaze, the pain in his voice, and he stormed past the cook through the bedroom door. His heart was racing, he just wanted to get out, out of this darkness, somewhere where there was light, and the shadows of the past could no longer catch up with him.  
But no matter how far he ran, everywhere only darkness hit him, there seemed to be no escape and he ran on, on and on, until finally, a few isolated lanterns began to flicker, and the streets slowly lit up again. Zoro stopped and grabbed his aching chest, sucking the air painfully into his burning lungs as he steadied himself and tried to figure out where he was. The area looked familiar and when he caught sight of the large red brick building with its many windows, he breathed a sigh of relief and sank to his knees, exhausted.  
Sanji dropped into the chair, when Chopper told him that Zoro had shown up at his place and was fine and offered to pick him up as soon as Vivi got here to watch Sessa, but the doctor denied it.  
"I think it's better if Zoro stays here overnight. He needs rest badly. Milk is off tomorrow and can take care of him. What happened, anyway?"  
Sanji hesitated whether to tell him everything, on the other hand Zoro was obviously not well and he decided to tell Chopper.   
"How long has this been going on?" Chopper asked after Sanji had told him everything.  
"I don't know, I'd say since he... you know..."  
Sanji hardly dared to say the words, for the memory was still too fresh.  
"But why didn't you say something sooner? Zoro obviously needs help badly, Sanji! Professional help to deal with what he's experienced!"  
"I know, but you know Zoro. He'd rather bite off his tongue than admit he has a problem..." Sanji sighed, slumping down in his chair, exhausted. His hand ran through his face as he imagined what could have happened.  
"That's why we have to make sure Zoro gets help. I have a former college friend who runs a therapy center and I'm sure he could arrange a place for Zoro, assuming that's what he wants, of course."  
They both sighed at the same time, knowing it would be a hard slog to convince Zoro to seek therapy. Chopper promised to get back to him tomorrow and hung up.   
Returning to the kitchen, Milk sat alone at the kitchen table, squeezing her boyfriend's hand as he propped both arms on the back of her chair and lowered his head to her forehead.  
"That bad?" she inquired anxiously, reaching out her arms to touch his cheeks.  
"I'm afraid so. Zoro needs help, and I don't know how to get him to seek it."  
"By help, you mean psychiatric?" Milk asked, concerned, and Chopper nodded at her forehead and wrapped his arms around her torso.  
“I should have known this experience would not leave him unscathed. What kind of friend am I...?"  
Milk broke free of the embrace and whirled around in her seat. Her hands held Chopper's face so tightly as if she were trying to crush his head, and her straight blonde hair swirled wildly back and forth as she shook her head, looking him firmly in the eyes.  
"Please don't do this Chopper. You cannot blame yourself; you hear me? You are not responsible for everything and everyone, even though sometimes you seem to think you are. I know you'd love to help the whole world, and I love you very much for that, but you can't, baby."  
Tenderly, she kissed his closed eyelids and wiped his wet lashes with her thumbs. Chopper pulled her to him and held her so tightly that she could hardly breathe, yet she let him, and an eternity seemed to pass before Chopper finally broke away from her, sighing, and went into the living room where Zoro had already made himself comfortable on the couch watching some action movie. When Zoro caught sight of Chopper, he pushed his legs off the couch and sat up straight as the doctor dropped down on the couch next to him.  
"What did the cook say? That I must never come near him and his princess again?"  
"No. He was worried about you, as we all were. You gave us quite a scare with your escape. Especially Sanji."  
Zoro slumped back and closed his eyes.  
"I know."  
"Does what happened tonight have anything to do with your kidnapping? Is that why you're having these panic attacks?"  
Zoro exhaled deeply and opened his eyes, which looked at Chopper, and he realized how Zoro was struggling with himself about whether he should really confide in him. He knew that Zoro never liked to talk about problems with others and that he had a hard time talking about feelings, especially fears, so he did not push him, but waited patiently to see if Zoro started talking on his own.  
"Not only. I'm... getting caught up in my past again Chopper."  
"Again?"   
Zoro nodded and averted his eyes from Chopper.  
“I actually thought I'd put all that shit behind me back then, but somehow... it's all suddenly coming back up..."  
"What are you talking about?"  
Zoo sighed pulling his legs to his body as if he was cold, wrapping his arms around them and gazing fixedly at the cup of tea still sitting untouched on the coffee table.  
"I was young when my mother died, and I dealt with her death as badly as my father did. He had promised to take care of me before she died, but he was completely overwhelmed by the new situation, but was too proud to ask for help or admit his problem to himself. Instead, he preferred to blame me for everything.  
That he could not go out because of me, like his other colleagues, that he could not meet women because he was convinced that women did not want to go out with widowers with difficult little children, that he constantly had to work overtime because of me, because I was so expensive, and that he had started drinking because of me, too. At first, I tried to put up with his moods and waited until he was drunk enough to fall asleep, but when his outbursts of rage became more frequent and worse, I only stayed outside and only came home when it was already pitch dark or when I knew that my father was at work. At some point, a neighbour informed the Youth Welfare Office because he had seen me loitering outside alone, but they did not do anything either, but just showed up from time to time to check up on me. But since they always announced their visits in advance, my father could always prepare for these visits and left me alone. At least until they left again."  
Chopper noticed how Zoro's arms wrapped tighter and tighter around his legs as he talked and confided all the terrible things to Chopper. Zoro told him about the countless times his father had dunked him with his head in the water, the nights he had spent locked up, in the dark closet, and finally the physical abuse. While Chopper listened to him in silence, he had to keep turning away to inconspicuously wipe away his tears with the heel of his hand so Zoro would not see them.  
"Does Sanji know about all this?" Chopper asked, noticing how brittle his voice sounded.  
Zoro shook his head and looked at Chopper as if he had lost his mind.   
"But why not? It would be easier for him to understand you!"  
"And what would it change, except that he would just look at me with pity? It's bad enough that he's seen me panic like this today."  
Chopper put a hand on Zoro's shoulder, hoping he would not pull away from him.  
"It's not a weakness to be human. You should have learned that from Sanji after all these years. I do not think he would pity you but feel even closer to you.   
We're all here for you, Zoro. Always."  
Now Chopper dared to put his arm around Zoro's back. He felt Zoro's tension slowly begin to release, and his arms, let go of his legs, which slid off the couch. Slowly, Zoro's head tipped to the side, finally landing on Chopper's curly mop of hair.  
"I know. Thanks buddy," he said, wrapping his arm around Chopper's neck. The doctor tried to break free of his grasp, but Zoro had already tucked his head under his arm and was pulling him up off the couch and led him toward the refrigerator.  
"I hope you bought enough beer!"

When Sanji was supposed to meet his new trainer a few days later, he was in anything but a good mood after learning from Chopper that Zoro had decided to go to therapy and had simply left without even saying goodbye. Only a short sms with the words "I'm doing therapy. Take care of yourself and the dwarf. I'll be in touch," he had written him and that was it. Since then, neither Sanji nor the others had heard from Zoro. Luffy had tried to reach Zoro on his cell phone a few times and even sent him a few messages, but Zoro had not gotten back to him, so Sanji had not even tried. Why should he? When he did not even bother to say goodbye to him in person. He had not even picked up his things from him, but had sent Chopper over, who had rather sheepishly accepted Zoro's travel bag and assured Sanji that Zoro had only not come by in person because he was still a little ashamed of his performance that night when the power had gone out everywhere, but Sanji knew that Zoro had not come because he hated goodbyes.   
Angrily, Sanji glanced at his display for the fifth time and finally stuffed it into his pocket in annoyance after checking his voicemail and messages, crossing his legs and bobbing up and down with the foot of the leg on top as he waited impatiently for the arrival of the man the production company had gotten him.  
He had some nerve, to keep him waiting in that café for an hour already. But at least the small desserts and coffee offered here were excellent, and Sanji was even considering whether he should treat himself to another small piece of that delicious warm apple pie as compensation for the wait, when his attention fell on a tall figure in a black leather coat who was walking purposefully towards him. He was well groomed and wore an upper lip beard that curled upward at the ends, as well as a chin curtain that stretched from his ear along his jawline, down his chin, and to the other ear. Sanji immediately felt intimidated at the sight of, his piercing, amber eyes, yet he could not take his eyes off of them as they looked down at him and the firm, warm hand grabbed his and gave it a short, but firm squeeze.  
"Sorry for the wait."  
"No... no problem, the food here sweetens the wait."  
"I'm sure it will, though you should refrain from snacking, at least until after the shooting, Mr..."  
"Vinsmoke. But please call me Sanji."  
"All right, Sanji. My name Mihawk. Mihawk Dulacre."


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello and welcome back to a new chapter!
> 
> I did my best to finish this chapter as fast as possible, so you don´t have to wait too long. The next chapter will be uploaded on Valentine´s Day and will be a valentine´s themed chapter. Thank you for your kudos and a special thank you to Kazz45690 and to sooozyj for your comments.  
> Stay safe and healthy!  
> See you soon!

"Why can't I come with you? We would have so much fun together! I'll pay for my own plane ticket, too!" Luffy begged, following Sanji like a shadow as he took one piece of clothing after another from the closet and handed it to Sessa to carefully place in the suitcase just as he had shown her.   
"I suppose you mean Law would pay for it for you. But even if he did, you still cannot come! Is it so hard for you to understand that I want to go on vacation alone with my daughter?"  
Luffy pouted and mumbled meekly "No, it isn´t, but I'll miss you." Sanji could understand that Luffy was feeling a bit lonely at home now, because Law had to work a lot of overtime again and therefore hardly had any time for him, and the others were also busy at work. Still, there was no way he could take him with him, because if Luffy found out the real reason for his trip, he would go completely nuts and then he could forget about his training. Sanji still could not believe that Zoro's biggest rival, Mihawk Dulacre, of all people, had offered to stay with him and train him. When they had met, he had felt that he knew him, but he could not say how at first. It was not until he was home and had time to digest it all that it had occurred to him why he looked so familiar. He had met him at the last great sword master tournament, in which Zoro had participated and lost in spectacular fashion to Mihawk. It had taken months for Zoro to recover from that defeat, but eventually Sanji had managed to help him accept his defeat and move on. And now he was supposed to train with this man, of all people. Sanji struggled with himself whether he should really accept this offer, because he knew that Zoro would not like it. On the other hand, they were no longer together and Sanji could do whatever he wanted. For this reason, he decided to accept Mihawk's offer, if only because he could take Sessa with him and was happy to have a vacation with his daughter. When he was sent the plane tickets two days later and found out where it was going, he almost fainted. He shook his head in disbelief and stared at the tickets. Seville. He had never been to Spain before and was looking forward to the Mediterranean food and sights of the city. Even though he would not have much time for sightseeing, there were still a few things he really wanted to see while he was there and decided to buy a guidebook. But first, he needed to lift Luffy's spirits so he could fly with a clear conscience and offered to cook him his favourite meal. Luffy was thrilled by the idea and followed Sanji and Sessa into the kitchen.   
Unfortunately, she had not said anything since the blackout, but he would not give up now that she had finally acknowledged him as her father and would fight to get her to talk more and to call him dad again, and their vacation together was the best opportunity for that.  
But the last day before their departure, should belong entirely to Luffy and Sessa, after all, the two would now not see each other for a while, because Sanji had to prepare intensively for the next 6 months for the upcoming filming. But neither Luffy nor the others knew anything about this, because Sanji just could not bring himself to tell them, especially not Luffy, who would then insist on being allowed to visit him at least every two weeks.   
In the evening, when Luffy asked to spend the night with Sessa, because he wanted to say goodbye to them the next morning, Sanji agreed and allowed him and Sessa to build a fort out of blankets in her bedroom, where they played and Luffy told her exciting stories about pirates, treasures and nasty marines, until he and Sessa finally fell asleep.   
The next morning, Sanji decided to take a cab to the airport and even gave Luffy money to drive home from the airport.  
As feared, the farewell turned out to be tearful, because when Sessa realized that she had to say goodbye to Luffy, she clung to his pant leg like a little monkey and refused to let him go.  
"Don't be sad Sessa, we'll see each other again soon, do we?" tried Ruffy to comfort her and looked at Sanji, but he just turned his head away and mumbled "of course". The black-haired man had the feeling that something was wrong, but he could not say what, only that Sanji was acting strangely and suspected that perhaps saying goodbye was harder for him than he wanted to admit. But it could also be that he was in a bad mood because of Zoro, who had simply left without saying goodbye. The only thing that was certain for him was that he would miss Sanji and Sessa a lot and an idea came to him how to make the separation a little more bearable.  
"Hey, what do you say we Skype every night before bed? I am sure Sanji has that app on his phone and if not, we can see each other on Whatsapp, then you can always tell me what you've been up to if you like. What do you think about that?"  
Sessa seemed to think about this idea seriously and finally nodded, although she probably did not know what he was talking about. Luffy stroked her head one last time and finally she broke away from him and Sanji took her by the hand.  
"Then we'd better get going before..." Sanji paused in mid-sentence as he felt his friend's arms on his back hugging him tightly.  
"I'll miss you..." Luffy said, and Sanji ran his hand tenderly through his thick hair.  
"I'll miss you too..." was all Sanji could muster, and he promised to check in as often as he could.  
This at least calmed Luffy down and he finally let him go, allowing Sanji and Sessa to board their flight.  
As they finally sat in the plane and taxied across the airfield, Sanji looked out the small side window and saw Luffy running down the long airport corridor waving at them and heard Sessa next to him say "Hejdå Wuffy*" and wave at him through the window. Sanji averted his eyes. Damn, how did he always manage to feel like a complete asshole? he thought and vowed to check in at least every three days.

At the airport of Seville, they were already expected by Mihawk, who picked them up personally and even helped them to put the suitcases into the car. Sanji was still a little queasy at the thought of spending 6 months with Mihawk in his house and in this picturesque city, with its narrow streets and the impressive houses built in the old Roman style and the marble-paneled courtyards. The most impressive sight, however, was that of his domicile, located about an hour and a half outside Seville, which opened up to him from afar as they approached the property, which covered an area of at least 300 square meters, with olive and bitter orange trees growing everywhere, and he stretched his head out the open window to breathe in the scent of oleander, bougainvillea and wisteria, which stretched like a red and blue carpet along the long driveway to the house, and thought he could even smell the sea from afar. Even Sessa could not tear herself away from the colorful sight of this blooming paradise and was very reluctant to let Sanji pull him along, who was eager to see the inside of the house, even though he was exhausted from the long flight. The interior of the house was decorated in warm orange and yellow tones, and although spartan, it was very tastefully furnished and the large floor-to-ceiling-stained glass windows, threw the most colorful mosaic patterns on the walls. In awe, Sanji walked through the house, feeling like Alice walking through Wonderland, discovering more and more things, such as the beautiful patio that was behind the house and wrapped around an oval pool whose mirrored surface shimmered in the sun like liquid gold. Sanji took off his shoes and socks and left the open patio to feast his eyes on something he had not seen in a long time: the ocean. The sandy beach was so fine that it trickled through his palms like an hourglass, his nasal cavities flared and so-called the scent of the sea, and his eyes feasted on the azure waters stretching before him.   
"It's just fantastic!" Sanji whispered breathlessly, enchanted by the scents he smelled. When he turned to Mihawk, he regarded him silently. Sessa, however, seemed overwhelmed by all the new things, especially the sight of the great, vast sea, which seemed to intimidate her.  
"Look Sessa, this is the sea! Come here and feel how fine the sand is!" he shouted encouragingly to her and Sessa slowly came closer. Her eyes wandered up and down the beach, but when her little hands dug into the fine sand and she realized it was regular sand like she knew from the sandbox, she began to dig and pile up sand and build a little sandcastle. Sanji regretted that he had forgotten in which suitcase he had packed the sand toys. He asked Mihawk for an old bowl or some other container by which he could carry water to make the sand hard enough to build a castle and knelt to help his daughter dig the moat. When Mihawk returned with a watering can, he smiled and thanked him when he realized it was already filled with water.  
Mihawk retreated to the patio and made himself comfortable on a lounger that stood under an open sunshade and watched the two of them, who seemed to forget everything around them and were completely absorbed in their play. He seemed to be a very loving and caring father who really blossomed in the presence of his daughter and seemed to become a child himself and seemed to enjoy muddling with sand and water as much as she did. Mihawk was stunned to find the corners of his own mouth pulling up as he caught sight of Sanji's smile, which made him look at least ten years younger.  
There was something soothing about watching their innocent play, a little too soothing perhaps, because he nodded off at some point and only woke up when something tickled his nose and when Mihawl opened his eyes he was looking into two bright blue eyes that were gleefully looking down at him and there was a seductive scent in the air that told him the blonde had been cooking.  
"I hope it wasn't too impertinent of us to use your kitchen, but I thought it was the least we could do to cook for you in thanks for your hospitality. I hope I succeeded with the paella, because Mediterranean cuisine is not exactly my specialty," he said, smiling again. He should smile more often, Mihawk thought, at least it suited him better than that sad look he had shown when they first met.  
"Well, if it tastes as good as it smells, I'm sure it's excellent," Mihawk said, stretching before rising and following the blond to the table, where the little girl was already sitting on a mountain of pillows, busily eating.  
"We'll go buy a highchair first thing in the morning" Mihawk decided, making a mental note so he would not forget. The food was excellent, as to be expected, and contrary to his usual habit, Mihawk had eaten more than usual and rubbed his full belly.  
"If you always cook like this, I'll have to exercise even more to get rid of the extra pounds."  
A soft red flitted across the blonde's features, growing even redder as he tried to take the plates from his hand to carry them into the house.   
"I'll do the dishes. You better take care of your daughter. You can unpack your bags in the meantime and keep looking around while I do the dishes," he offered, disappearing with the plates before the blond could take them from him.  
Sighing, Sanji let him go and gently pushed Sessa back into the house, although she would much rather continue playing in the sand.  
When they reached the top floor and opened the first door, they were standing in a large room overlooking a grove where olives grew on one side and oranges on the other, and he could not help but shake his head at the sight, wondering what he had done to deserve so much luck.  
"If only you could see this paradise too" he whispered to himself, watching his daughter who was already tampering with the zipper of her suitcase, presumably because she wanted her action figure and her beloved stuffed dog, which he had taken the precaution of stowing in the suitcase so they would not get lost. Once she had both, she hugged them tightly and walked over to the bed. Gently she put them both under the blanket, gave them both a fleeting kiss and said "Good night" in her sugary sweet little voice.  
He was a bit envious, because he would have liked to get a kiss from her, too, but he did not want to push her into anything and was content for the time being that she finally called him daddy, even if that had only happened once. It seemed like an unreal dream to him that she had really called him daddy, and he still could not believe that Zoro had left her alone, still wondering why she had been naked. Unfortunately, Sessa had not been able to tell him what had happened that night, so he could only speculate. The only explanation he could think of was that maybe the diaper had slipped, and she had boiled herself in and that was why Zoro had wanted to shower or bathe her, because the bathroom had been wet when he had entered it later. And that is probably when that fatal power outage had occurred, leading to Zoro's panic attack. The memory still sent a shiver down his spine when he recalled Zoro's horror and the fear in his eyes, and he felt disappointment that he had not wanted to talk to him about it, preferring instead to keep everything to himself, as if he were a stranger to him and not his partner, with whom he had been together for seven years after all. Sanji pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and angrily slammed it down on the small dresser when he still found no messages from Zoro. Had they taken his cell phone, or did he feel guilty and therefore did not contact him?   
"Asshole!" Sanji grumbled angrily as he unpacked the suitcases and Sessa helped him put everything away. When they were done with that, he decided to take a little walk around the property with Sessa, despite his tiredness, picking olives that he wanted to use to make a salad. But before that, they first explored the rest of the upper floor, where they found two more huge marble-tiled bathrooms, as well as three more bedrooms, the darkest of which was probably Mihawk's, because there was a large sword hanging on one wall, so he quickly closed the door again and went downstairs, where Mihawk had made himself comfortable with a book in an armchair covered with dark brown calfskin.  
Obviously Mihawk was not a fan of light literature, at least not of modern ones, because the pages of the book were very yellowed and the dark, leather cover made a very antique, valuable impression on Sanji, even if the author did not tell him anything. No sooner had he and Sessa entered the room than Mihawk looked up and Sanji asked if he could pick some olives in the garden to make a salad. Mihawk did not mind and disappeared, only to return moments later with a small raffia basket. Sanji inquired if he wanted to accompany them, but Mihawk shook his head and suggested they start preparing dinner while they got the olives for the salad. As the sun was already slowly setting on the horizon, he hurried with Sessa to gather the olives and lifted her onto his shoulders for her to pick. At first, she clung to his head fearfully, but soon she lost the initial fear and even dared to take her arms off his head to reach for the olives, taste a few, and spit out the pits, just as Sanji had shown her.   
"Look at that sunset Sessa. Isn't it beautiful?" he asked her admiringly as the sun disappeared behind the trees, bathing everything in a reddish-yellow light that turned the sky pink.  
"Sun´s sleepy!" Sessa commented on the spectacle, bringing a smile to her father's face, who was happy to hear her voice. Lovingly, he stroked her knees with his fingers and nestled his cheek against her right little leg for a moment.   
"Come on, let's go back!" he said and went back into the house where Mihawk had already prepared gazpacho**. Sanji quickly prepared the salad and carried everything out to the patio, which was already lit by small lanterns hanging all over the patio and set the table with Sessa's help. The gazpacho tasted delicious and went wonderfully with the red wine Mihawk served with it, yet Sanji only allowed himself a little, not wanting to get drunk in front of his daughter.   
"Is it actually always as warm in the winter as it is today?" inquired Sanji, and Mihawk nodded.  
"Winters here tend to be mild, it very rarely gets really cold."  
"Enviable," Sanji said, pouring himself a glass of water from the carafe.  
"Yes, it's gorgeous here. Only the summers here are almost unbearable, but you can get used to that, too."  
"I think I could get used to anything here," Sanji said, pensively watching the sunset. He did not notice Mihawk eyeing him furtively as he sipped his red wine, letting his gaze wander over Sanji's features and the long legs. When the sun had disappeared and it was starting to get a little cold, they disappeared into the house, did the dishes together, which felt more intimate to Sanji than it should, and then said goodbye, because Sanji, like Sessa, was tired and wanted to go to bed early.  
Mihawk decided to go to bed as well and ran up the stairs behind them, which made Sanji a little uncomfortable because he somehow felt he could sense Mihawk's gaze from behind and hurried upstairs quickly.   
"If you need anything, you can find my room at the end of the hall" Mihawk just said and Sanji nodded and disappeared into his room. Somehow Mihawk did not seem familiar to him sometimes. His gaze triggered strange feelings to him, things he would rather not feel in his presence, because they were only hindering their training together. He helped Sessa into her pyjamas and went to the bathroom to get ready himself, and when he returned to the room, Sessa was already lying in the middle of the big bed. He had thought long and hard about whether he should share a room with her or rather let her sleep alone in one of the other guest rooms and had decided to share a bed with her, or at least try to. To leave her enough space, he lay down on the edge of the mattress and inquired if she liked the bed, but Sessa did not answer and just looked at him as if he were an alien or a purple bristle pig with yellow spots and wings.  
"Do you want me to read you anything? He inquired and when Sessa nodded, he picked up her favourite book and opened it. Even though his Swedish was more than poor, and he barely understood what he was reading, he did not want Sessa to lose her mother tongue and so he bumbled from one word to the next until Sessa suddenly slid over to him, ducked under his arm, and nestled her back against him. Now it was Sanji who looked puzzled, but he continued to read and Sessa looked at the pictures and occasionally helped him with the pronunciation of some words she knew and even pointed with her finger when she found the object she was talking about in the pictures, as if she wanted to show him the meaning of the word. Sanji's heart beat uncontrollably as he struggled to pronounce the words that blurred before his eyes as Sessa did. He was so happy that he wanted to hold her against him and never let go, but he was just able to control himself and preferred to continue reading until Sessa said nothing more and only her soft, steady breaths could be heard, and he slammed the book shut. Since he was already lying on the edge, he could not move away even if he wanted to, but he did not know where to put his arm, so he carefully put it over Sessa and very softly breathed "Good night", so softly that she could not have heard it, yet he heard her voice speaking to him in her sleep, saying "God natt pappa***". When he heard that, he could not hold on anymore, hugged her as gently as he could and thanked Nami, for having Sessa and for the first time since her death, he could think of her without bursting into tears.

Zoro was also lying in his bed, but not because he was tired, but because he was working on a text to send to Sanji.

I am sorry for leaving Sessa alone in the dark... And for hitting her. I did not mean to, but... I just lost control. Just for a second. I swear I will never hurt her again.

Zoro immediately deleted the text and started again.

Now you know how messed up I am. I should never have moved back in. That was a mistake.

Again, he deleted the text and tried a third time.

I am sorry I disappeared. I was ashamed, for what you saw me do. For what I did to her. I just lost control for a second and gave her a slap on the butt. I am so sorry. Forgive me. 

Zoro's finger hovered over the send button for a moment, but then he lowered it again, cursed, and dropped the arm with the phone next to his body. No matter what he tried, he just could not find the right words to explain to the cook what had happened. Frustrated, he ran a hand through his hair.  
He had not meant to hurt her, and yet he had lost his temper, just like his father had with him back then, and he deeply loathed himself for it, hated himself for becoming what he had feared the most: becoming like his father. For this reason, he had never wanted children and had always resisted when the cook brought up the subject, convinced that he should definitely not raise children, after all, because just like his father, he was easily irritable, which had always gotten him into trouble, especially during his adolescence, because he messed with everyone, especially adults, whom he simply did not want to accept as authority figures, until at some point he was even sent far away, to a cattle ranch that specialized in difficult children like him who knew how to deal with him. There things got a little better and the nightmares he often had about his father also became fewer, until at some point they disappeared altogether and Zoro thought he had finally come to terms with his past. But now they were back and with them even new ones came, which haunted him night after night and he wondered if he had ever really gotten rid of them, or if they had simply slumbered deep inside him and waited to return.

*Goodbye Wuffy  
**soup with vegetables (can be eaten cold or warm)  
***Good Night Papa


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my lovely readers!  
> Happy Valentine´s Day! I hope you have/had a great day so far.  
> Today I´m going to reveal a little detail that I mentioned in my first chapter of Blow, so prepare yourselves.  
> I was so showered, with comments and kudos in the last chapter, that I wanted to give you something special as a thank you for your support and love for this story. (Thank you so much to Kazz45690, sooozyj, BabYGaara and 1996her and for all who gave kudos!)  
> Have a lovely day/evening and stay safe!  
> See you soon!  
> Kisses and hugs,  
> Deliana

Sanji was awakened by the cheerful chirping of the birds and slowly straightened up in bed to not wake up Sessa, but when he looked at the empty hollow next to him, he realized that she was no longer in bed at all. Still slightly woozy from sleep, he glanced at his alarm clock and jumped up abruptly when he saw that it was already afternoon.  
How had he been able to sleep so long? He was usually the first one awake. For some reason, he had slept more deeply today than he had in a long time. Too long. Probably it was due to the training. Mihawk might be attentive and friendly, but that did not apply to training, as Sanji painfully realized while he hurriedly got dressed. They had been training like maniacs for a month to get Sanji in shape for filming. Mihawk had even arranged a nanny for Sessa, a racy beauty with long black hair named Hancock so Sanji could train undisturbed.  
"Sorry, I overslept!!! I don't know why!!!" Sanji exclaimed as he came rushing into the kitchen. The corners of Mihawk's mouth pulled up in amusement as he watched Sanji wet his fingers with his mouth to smooth his bedraggled hair and rose to prepare him some food. Embarrassed, Sanji took the plate and almost dropped it in shock when he felt Mihawk's fingers tenderly brush his hand under the plate as Sanji took it.   
"Tha... thank you," he whispered sheepishly, dropping into the chair between Sessa and Hancock, who immediately turned to him and began to run her long, beautiful fingers through his hair, smoothing out the last unruly strands. Sanji inhaled and exhaled audibly, trying to ignore the fact that her bosom kept brushing his cheek. When she tried to brush his hair out of his forehead, he took her hands in his to prevent her from seeing his other eyebrow as well and tenderly kissed her fingertips in apology.  
"That's enough Señora Boa. You're a sweetheart, but the pony, stays where it is."  
"It's a shame to hide those beautiful eyes, though," she said regretfully, slowly withdrawing her hands, which he would have liked to hold longer, and looking at Sessa, who was eating eagerly.  
"She is such a sweet girl. I don't understand how a woman can leave such a sweet little family," she babbled offhandedly, whereupon Sanji's gaze darkened.  
"She had no other choice. She was sick, unfortunately."  
Hancock bit his lips and apologized for her choice of words, but Sanji shook his head and assured her that she had not hurt him. She had no way of knowing. Hancock wanted to make up for it, so she invited him and Mihawk over for dinner. Sanji gratefully accepted the offer and Mihawk also accepted her invitation with a nod.  
"Hancock owns one of the largest and best pinacoteca in Seville, where you can find the most exquisite wines," he said and Sanji could not wait to visit it and taste a wine or two.  
After eating, Mihawk suggested they skip training for today and instead take a long walk on the beach to enjoy the beautiful weather. Sanji and Sessa loved the idea. Hancock would have liked to go too, but she had errands to run in town and therefore did not have time to accompany them.  
Mihawk was right, the weather was beautiful and Sanji enjoyed the sun on his skin and the smell of the fresh sea air in his nose.   
Normally he would wear a shirt and long, dark pants, but considering the temperatures, he had opted for a short-sleeved white shirt, knee-length jean shorts and dark blue sneakers, which he had recently bought in town when he was shopping with Mihawk and Sessa. Mihawk had advised him to buy the shirt one size larger, because in a few months, the training would start to show and then it could be that the clothes, especially on the upper arms stretched. Sanji knew exactly what Mihawk meant, that was also the reason why Zoro always bought his clothes, rather a little bigger, because he hated it when he felt constricted, although Sanji would have liked to see him in a skintight jeans and muscle shirt once.  
"Why so pensive?" Mihawk asked, walking up beside him. Sanji shook his head, as if he could banish the memory of Zoro that way.  
"Nothing, it's just... I just remembered that this is the first Valentine's Day I'm spending as a single..."  
"I see..." Mihawk said, putting his hands in his pockets. For a while they walked side by side in silence, watching Sessa walk along the water's edge, bending over to collect the small shells washed up by the tide.   
"It was true love, wasn't it?" Mihawk asked, and Sanji nodded.   
"Yes, it was, although it wasn't easy. We argued a lot and had different opinions on a lot of things, but we always somehow managed to get back together and respect each other's opinions, except for one thing..."  
"And that would be?"  
"Kids."  
Mihawk was visibly confused and looked back and forth between Sanji and Sessa.   
"But then why did you... I mean you have a kid..."  
"Oh no, no, I'm not talking about Sessa's mother. It's... complicated."  
Sanji began to tell Mihawk the whole story. Mihawk watched Sessa while he listened to Sanji and just nodded every now and then.  
"Now I understand the pain in your eyes. It takes strength to cope with what you've been through. You are an admirable man."  
"I had no choice, my daughter needed me. Without her and my friends, I never would have gotten through all of this."  
"I think you underestimate yourself, Sanji. You're much stronger than you think," Mihawk said, and Sanji saw in his eyes that he meant it.   
"What do you say if we go out?"  
"And what do you have in mind?"  
Mihawk smiled and said mysteriously, "let me surprise you."

Zoro walked thoughtfully across the leafy, sprawling hospital grounds, letting his gaze wander over the fence, behind which a few men were toasting each other with alcohol and talking animatedly. He had not had a drink since he had been here, and just the sight of a beer bottle was enough to spark a longing in him. Stealthily, he squinted in all directions to make sure no one saw him before approaching the fence as inconspicuously as possible.   
The small group eyed him critically as he leaned back against the fence and hissed over his shoulder to catch their attention, sliding his hand through the bars.  
"Can I have a sip, too?" he asked, squinting at the bottle directly in front of him. The man, a guy in his mid-40s with brown, shaggy hair and a shadow of a beard, looked first at the bottle in his hand and then at Zoro and shrugged.   
"Fine by me," he said, handing the bottle to Zoro, who almost snatched it out of his hand. Finally, able to drink something other than tea or water for the first time in a long while, he raised the neck of the bottle to his mouth, but immediately lowered it again when he saw someone from the clinic staff hurrying toward him. Hastily, Zoro tucked the bottle into the waistband of his sweatpants and moved away from the group, much to the displeasure of the guy who had given him the bottle. This pain in the ass with his constant good mood was the last thing he needed today, but unfortunately, he was not going to be left behind so easily and had caught up with Zoro after only a few meters. "Hey, wait!" Shanks demanded and put his hand on Zoro's back, but he only had a grumpy grumble left for him.  
"Why are you in a hurry?" the redhead inquired curiously, but Zoro ignored the question and just marched on. Shanks caught up with him again, circling the green-haired man and reaching into Zoro's pants unbidden, pulling out the beer bottle.   
"Tsk, tsk, tsk, Zoro, Zoro. You know alcohol is not allowed. After all, we have people here with alcohol and drug problems. Or do you want any of them to relapse?"  
"Of course not! Heck, I was just going to take a quick sip and then give it back to him until you suddenly showed up!"  
"Ah, I see, you're embarrassed because I caught you in flagrante delicto," Shanks stated with a grin, waving the bottle under Zoro's nose. "I'll give the bottle back for you. You better make sure you get back in there quick, group therapy is about to start."  
This was the last thing Zoro wanted to do, but unfortunately it was part of the therapy and so he surrendered to his fate and shuffled back into the building with his hands buried deep in his pockets. Although there were enough leisure activities besides the therapy, Zoro was bored most of the time and missed his friends, who were not allowed to visit him at his request, because he wanted to concentrate fully on the therapy and therefore could not use any distraction. For this reason, he also kept his cell phone turned off.  
He had 30 minutes left until therapy, which he wanted to use to have a quick nap, since he had not slept much.  
His room was small, it just fit a bed and a closet and did not even have a TV, which made him angry the most, because time could pass very slowly here. For this reason, he had started playing squash, even if he still had to be a little careful because of his ribs and had started doing yoga because Shanks thought it would help him relax. By relaxation, however, Zoro imagined something different. The class consisted of 90% women who gawked at him and watched every move. Nevertheless, he continued because, contrary to his initial scepticism, he realized that it was really doing him good and was now even doing his exercises in his room to pass the time somehow.  
Zoro sighed when he discovered a dozen perfumed letters on his bed, all bearing his name, presumably all participants in the yoga class, and he regretted that he had not yet told anyone about his homosexuality, except for the others in his therapy group. Although they could not help it, he hated them for reminding him of his third Valentine's Day with the cook. Zoro lay down on the bed, still holding the letters, and looked at the white, pink, and blue envelopes, thinking back to that February 14th, four years ago.

Zoro had just finished his Taebo beginner's course and was about to take a shower when his cell phone screen lit up and the chef's name appeared. Annoyed, Zoro pulled it out of his pocket and answered with a curt, "What is it?"  
"I just wanted to know what time you'd be home."  
"Late in any case. I have to fill in for a colleague who got sick. Unfortunately."  
Zoro heard the cook on the other end grit his teeth.  
"And why you of all people! Because you're the only one who doesn't have a wife and kids waiting for you at home?"  
"Since when do you have a problem with me working late? Somehow, we have to pay off the house!" Zoro yelled, rubbing his fingers over the root of his nose as he realized he was getting a headache. He was tired and not in the mood for an argument with the cook.  
"Forget it! See you tomorrow at breakfast then!" the cook replied and simply hung up. Angrily, Zoro threw the cell phone back into his bag and headed for the showers with his towel.  
The hot water burned his skin, but it was just the thing to relieve the tension in his shoulders and neck and to forget, at least for a moment, the trouble with the cook, who was rightly angry, but they had decided to buy this house and now had to see how they could pay it off. He would love to take another job where he could earn more to support the chef, but with his degree, the chances of that were slim, so he had no choice but to take every opportunity to earn some extra money, even taking on private clients who would rather be trained at home in their own four walls than crammed into a small space with a dozen strangers.   
Zoro's gaze slid over to the wall clock that told him it was 8 p.m. and thus he still had three hours of work to do, and he pressed his forehead against the wet tile wall before pushing himself off the wall with his hands and exiting the shower stall. When he encountered Bellamy in the locker rooms, he decided and asked him if he could take his last class and was relieved when he said yes.  
"Thanks, I owe you one!" Zoro said, slapping Bellamy amicably on the back and returning to the locker rooms to change and prepare for the next class.  
At 10 p.m., Zoro left the studio and, without showering, drove home. As he drove up the driveway to the house, he saw that there was still a light on the first floor and braced himself for the impending thunder that would break over him as soon as he walked through the door.  
But all he heard was the television and he followed the noise, leaving the bag in the hallway. The Cook was sitting on the couch with his arms crossed, watching one of those hideous shows that were on a continuous loop on TV. Normally the blond did not watch shows unless he was pissed off about something.  
Since Zoro's stomach was growling, he decided to go to the kitchen to see if he had at least cooked him something and remained rooted to the spot, cursing. The cook had obviously planned something special and had arranged the table romantically, with candlesticks and a white tablecloth and decorative napkins, which he had even neatly folded, just as he always did in the Baratié, and finally the penny dropped as to why the cook was so upset. There was not much that mattered to the blonde except holidays, birthdays and... Valentine's Day. Being an eternal romantic, he came up with something new every year to surprise Zoro, but with the stress of the house they had just bought, Zoro had completely forgotten about him this year.  
The green-haired man approached the table and looked at the empty plates, noticing a small red envelope that smelled of his favourite perfume.  
Opening it, he found a letter inside, also red, and unfolded it.  
I love you; I hate you,  
All at the time  
I kiss you; I curse you,  
I want you to be mine  
I can´t with you, but without neither,  
You are everything, I love, but hate either.  
Zoro placed the note on the table and opened the refrigerator where the cook had stowed dinner and filled a plate, which he slid into the microwave. Soon it was emitting a delicious aroma that made Zoro's stomach growl loudly, and he carried the plate into the living room, where the cook was still sitting and staring at the TV.  
Zoro flopped down on the couch and placed the plate on the side table.  
"And what about me?" the cook inquired, offended.  
"That's enough for two," Zoro said, pulling the cook onto his lap, who struggled fiercely when Zoro tried to shove the spoon into his mouth. The green-haired man was not about to give up so easily, however, and stuffed the fork into his own mouth. The cook's eyes widened as Zoro used his tongue to shove the food into his mouth and blushed.  
"You think that's going to make everything okay?" mumbled Sanji with his mouth full, wiping some gravy from the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand.  
"No, of course it isn't. I'm sorry I forgot what day it was with all the work I've been doing."  
Sanji shoved another piece of meat into Zoro's mouth to get him to shut up. He had intended to be angry with him for the rest of the evening, but somehow the anger had faded the moment, the moss head had shoved the piece of meat into his mouth and kissed him. Probably because he wanted to end the evening harmoniously, rather than angry. Besides, he had prepared a surprise for Zoro, but for that he had to get rid of him for a few minutes. They kept feedding each other until the plate was finally empty, and when the last bite had disappeared in Zoro's mouth, Sanji ordered him to clear the table and wash up, since he was after all the one who had almost ruined the evening, and as soon as the green-haired man had disappeared into the kitchen, he sneaked upstairs to the bedroom.   
Zoro was a bit surprised when he returned from the kitchen and found the cook no longer in the living room. Perhaps he was tired and had gone upstairs, he thought, and went up the stairs to check.  
"You sure took your time" the cook retorted, rising from the bed, and walking toward him. Zoro's eyes slowly wander down Sanji's body, who was now wearing only a pair of skin-tight black leather pants that accentuated his long, sexy legs, and frowned in confusion.  
"What's a pole doing in our bedroom?" Zoro inquired perplexedly, but instead of an answer, only received a kick in the butt that sent him sprawling onto the bed. Angry at the rude treatment, he braced himself on his forearms and wanted to know what that was all about, but again he received no answer, but watched as the chef moved to the CD player with swaying hips and turned it on, whereupon a slow melody sounded and he changed the light with the help of a remote control, which bathed the room in a bluish-white fluorescent light and stood, left leg slightly bent, with his back to Zoro and lowered his head. As a voice slowly began to sing on the radio, the chef whirled around with a casual twist, sliding his hand over his thigh, slowly raising his head, and looking at Zoro out of his seductive dark blue eyes that appeared from beneath his thick, light lash line.  
As if spellbound, the moss-head watched the chef move toward him with lithe steps and, just before he stood in front of the bed, yanked up his left leg and swung it in a casual motion first to one side and then to the other before placing it back on the floor and moving his upper body up and down in a wave-like motion. Zoro licked his lips with his tongue as the chef whirled around and rubbed his hips against the pole, driving Zoro insane with lust.  
The green-haired one beckoned him with his index finger to join him on the bed, but the cook just shook his head, stretched out his right arm, which gripped the pole bar, and swung into the air. Gracefully, the long legs circled the pole as if dancing in the air before he slowly floated back down to the floor. The slender hips circled sensuously back and forth, and the hard abdominal muscles rubbed up and down against the cold metal.  
Zoro, meanwhile, sat at the foot of the bed, legs spread wide and torso propped up on his arms, wishing he could trade places with the pole, but the cook merely wagged his index finger back and forth, grinned, and disengaged himself from the pole. His long, slender fingers slid over his flat stomach, down to his crotch, eliciting a hoarse gasp from Zoro as he placed his other hand on his crotch as well and spread his legs, whereupon they slid apart and did the splits. Slowly they pulled together again and the blond lay belly-down on his stomach. Stretching his butt up in the air, Sanji slowly straightened his upper body, gyrating his hips seductively while pulling his thighs together and apart repeatedly, before pulling himself up on the bar, this time with both arms, and spiralling backwards up around the bar until he reached the top of it.  
Zoro had to put his head back to continue watching the chef, holding his breath, as the blond stretched his legs up vertically until they were above his head and spiralled slowly downward. Just before he reached the ground, Sanji lowered his feet until he touched the ground and, holding onto the bar with one hand, leaned with his back against the cold metal and stroked himself between his legs and thighs. Zoro had never been so turned on by anything as he was by the cook's performance, as the blonde slowly slid onto his knees, pushing his thighs apart and back together again and again, as if he were performing a wild ride that would set Zoro's loins on fire.   
Zoro threw his head back and groaned as his own hand slipped under his waistband, and his voice sounded hoarse and rough as he called out to the cook.  
"What is it? Was that too much for you?" the cook asked him, grinning cheekily down at him from above. Zoro's eyes literally pierced Sanji as he extended his powerful arm, hooked his fingers into Sanji's waistband, and commanded him in a deep, sexy voice, "Come here!"

Sanji had been staring at the floor-length wall mirror in silence for half an hour, smoking his third cigarette. When Mihawk had told him he wanted to go out with him, Sanji had still believed it was a joke, but when he'd handed him a cardboard box after their walk together and he'd unfolded the fine tissue paper and caught sight of the suit inside, his laughter had abruptly faded. Almost in awe, Sanji had lifted the suit out of the box to look at it. The fabric was the softest and most precious thing he had ever held in his hands, and it looked so sinfully expensive that it gave him inferiority complexes and made him feel unworthy of wearing it. He had told Mihawk the same thing when he had inquired whether he liked it, but Mihawk had insisted that he wear it because he had had it made especially for him.  
When Sanji had then inquired where he got his measurements, Mihawk had only winked suggestively and said that he had an eye for such details.  
The fabric clung to his body like a second skin, and the golden-yellow paisley pattern on the midnight-black vest and silk tie shimmered in the light of the deck lights, as if trying to compete with the diamond cufflinks and silver tie pin with the blue sapphire set into it. Even the small white silk rose tucked in his breast pocket shimmered as if it had been dusted with silver dust.   
His hand was still shaking as he stubbed out the rest of the cigarette in the ashtray and closed the window before leaving the bathroom and returning to the bedroom to make sure Sessa was indeed sound asleep. Tenderly, he stroked the unruly hair from her face and smiled when he caught sight of her relaxed little face, which resembled Nami even more than usual when she was asleep.  
"Good night, princess," he whispered, running a finger gently over her curled brow before giving her a kiss on the forehead and heading down the stairs to the first floor. Hancock and Mihawk were sitting in the living room talking about Spanish literature when Sanji entered the room behind them. Hancock slapped her hands over her mouth at the sight of Sanji and jumped up, and Mihawk also let his eyes wander over Sanji's body in admiration and smiled with satisfaction.  
"You look so beautiful" Hancock said admiringly and even walked around Sanji to admire him from all sides. Sanji was uncomfortable being stared at like that, especially by someone as beautiful as Hancock, and lowered his eyes in embarrassment.  
"It's just the suit. Clothes make the man," Sanji said with a nervous laugh, raising his head as Mihawk rose from his chair and walked slowly toward him. He, too, was already changed and, just like Sanji, was wearing black pants, an embroidered black vest, and a burgundy shirt underneath, the first three buttons open, revealing the flawless tanned skin beneath.   
"You're too modest, Sanji," Mihawk replied, looking down at Sanji, who was trying to withstand the gaze of his amber eyes.  
"Shall we go?" Mihawk inquired, and Sanji glanced up at the stairs.   
"Don't worry about your daughter, Hancock has plenty of experience when it comes to children through her nieces and nephews. And in case of emergency, she has my number and your number. So, you can drive with peace of mind," Mihawk said and Sanji nodded, albeit very hesitantly. A few moments later, as they drove down the driveway in Mihawk's cabrio, Sanji looked back one last time and watched the house grow smaller and smaller until he could not see it at all and looked ahead again. The evening was mild and cloudy, and from a distance Sanji could make out the lights of Seville after a while, bathing the city in a brilliant sea of yellow, and inquired where Mihawk was taking him.  
"It´s a surprise," he said again, meaningfully, and left it at that, so Sanji had no choice but to be content with that statement and instead enjoyed the sight of Seville at night. When they reached the centre, Mihawk parked the car in a parking garage and, much to Sanji's amazement, handed his key to an employee.  
"In case they need to move the car" Mihawk explained only and with a nod of his head indicated Sanji to run after him. From the parking garage, they walked for about another 7 minutes until they turned into a small, hidden side street and finally stood in front of a dance school.  
Sanji eyed Mihawk with raised brows, but only got a smile from him.  
"Don't worry, we're alone tonight. Come," he urged Sanji, taking him by the hand.  
Sanji's face lit up, like the evening sun, as he followed Mihawk through the premises and stopped in the middle of a completely mirrored room, where Mihawk left him standing and approached a CD player sitting on a chair. Immediately, the room was filled with music and Mihawk turned back to Sanji.  
"You didn't rent the dance school for an entire evening, did you?" Sanji inquired.  
Mihawk shook his head. "I don't need to, because it's mine." Sanji's jaw dropped. The black-haired one was full of surprises.  
Mihawk raised his hands upward and motioned Sanji to press his against them. Sanji briefly wiped his sweating hands, on his pants and placed them carefully on Mihawk's. A slight tingle travelled from the heel of Sanji's hand up into his fingertips as their hands touched, and his heart pounded excitedly as he looked into the amber eyes.  
"Very nice. First, let us start with my favorite dance, the tango. Have you ever danced the tango?" Mihawk inquired, and Sanji shook his head sheepishly. Except for the fidgeting in the disco in his youth, which could not be called dancing by any stretch of the imagination, and the pole dancing course he had taken years ago, he had never really learned to dance.  
"It doesn't matter, we'll start with the easiest. First, we do three steps. I start by taking a step forward with my left foot while you take a step back with your right foot. I'll show you." Sanji looked at Mihawk's feet and mimicked his movements.  
"Very nice, now we'll do it the other way" Mihawk explained and Sanji did as he was told. After that, Sanji was to try again without looking at his feet, but somehow his eyes kept darting down.  
"Dancing is feeling, Sanji. Let the music and your body guide you and feel the rhythm. Then everything will come naturally," Mihawk assured him, slowly sliding the fingers of his left hand down the underside of Sanji's arm and slid under the blond's armpit until his hand touched Sanji's shoulder.  
A pleasant shiver ran through Sanji's body as he felt Mihawk's hand sliding down his spine and swallowed as his palm pulled him close and their bodies touched.  
"Feel free to put your arm around me," Mihawk encouraged him and as Sanji placed his free hand on Mihawk's back, their bodies began to move slowly to the rhythm of the music until they melted into it and there was only the music and their bodies, nestled together like lovers. At some point, Sanji did not even count the steps or look at his feet, because all his attention was on those amber eyes that looked down on him and put him more and more under their magical spell, which he was no longer able to escape.  
"You see, you just have to let the music flow through you. You are a very sensual and sensitive man Sanji, I can see that in your eyes, because you have that fire, even if very weak now, that longs to be rekindled and burn ablaze. It is such a shame that you let life wear you down and always think of others instead of yourself. I know you have a lot of love to give, but you unfortunately forget that you also deserve to ask for love back. Enjoy life, Sanji, revel in the good things in life and just let yourself drift, as you are doing right now. I know you cannot just forget the seven years you spent with your boyfriend. I do not want you to, but... you cannot mourn for him forever either, Sanji. You have to move on with your life, just like he did."  
Mihawk released his hands and placed them on Sanji's cheeks, which glowed under his palms, stroked his cheeks and forehead with his thumbs, bared his eyebrows, and leaned down to him until the tips of their noses almost touched, looking deep into the blue eyes. Sanji saw that he wanted to kiss him, but Mihawk hesitated, as if waiting for his approval. He was not sure if he should really do it if he was ready to commit to someone new yet. On the other hand, there was this undeniable longing to touch Mihawk's lips, to taste and feel him, that took possession of him and finally made him take the cold plunge into the water as Sanji closed his eyes and kissed Mihawk.


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello my lovelies!
> 
> This week you get a short chapter, I´m sorry, I couldn´t write a longer chapter, but I will try to make the next one longer. Unfortunately I will be busy for the next few weeks, so the next chapter will appear in two to three weeks.   
> I wished I could upload sooner because you have always been so kind and heartwarmingly sweet to me, that I really feel bad, that I have to let you wait so long. :(  
> A special thank you goes to Kazz45690, sooozyj, Moonlightstar and 1996her for your beautiful comments and for all the kudos! <3  
> Stay safe and see you in 2/3 weeks!

Arms folded across his chest, Zoro's gaze roamed over the individual participants, all of whom listened intently to Pudding, who talked about her domineering mother who had bullied her and made her life a living hell, while the rest of the group listened in silence and Zoro hoped that the cup would pass him by this time as well. So far, he had only been asked to say something once, and that was on his first day. Patiently, the other participants had waited for him to tell them something about himself, to reveal his inner self, but he had bitterly disappointed them, admitting only that he was gay and that he was here to work on his problems, without specifying them. No one had reproached him for that, but had accepted his reticence; after all, no one was forced to talk, even if Shanks never got tired of emphasizing that it was important to talk and that they didn't have to work everything out on their own. But that was easier said than done, Zoro thought, sinking even further into his chair. He probably would have fallen asleep had he not been rudely and suddenly jerked out of his thoughts. Jerkily, he pushed his upper body back into a more upright position and looked into the brown eyes of the red-haired therapist, who beamed at him expectantly.  
"Well, Zoro, how does it look? Would you like to tell us now a little about yourself? Whatever comes to your mind". The green-haired man shrugged, pressing his arms tightly to his chest like a shield and crossing his outstretched legs.  
"Not really."  
"Oh, come on Zoro, it's just us," Pudding tried to encourage him, but all she achieved was to make him close himself off even more. He realized it was necessary to talk to a therapist, but why did he have to confide in a whole bunch of people he barely knew? What added value was there if they all knew he had a shitty childhood? That he had been buried alive and haunted by nightmares ever since?  
"Of course, if Zoro does not want to talk today, he doesn't have to. Maybe next time he will feel more like it," Shanks said confidently, even though Zoro's posture suggested the exact opposite, and thanked everyone before ending today's session. Zoro was about to follow the others outside when he was suddenly held back by Shanks, who asked him to stay for a moment. Zoro could guess the reason and rolled his eyes when Shanks inquired how he liked it here.  
"It's okay. A little boring sometimes, but I'm hoping that will change once I get back to training properly."  
"You work out quite a bit, huh?"  
"I'm a fitness trainer, and I teach swordsmanship classes on the side."  
"Wow, pretty impressive. Why didn't you tell me about that today?"  
Again, Zoro's shoulders shrugged upward.  
"I thought you guys wanted to hear some sad stories."  
Shanks sighed and gestured with his hand toward a chair. Hesitantly, Zoro approached it and took a seat, but without putting down his arms, which seemed stapled to his chest, and waited until Shanks groaned as he sat down in the chair opposite him.  
"It may not seem like it to you, but these therapy sessions are not for the entertainment of everyone present, but to show everyone that they are not alone, that everyone has their problems, in the hope that this will make it easier for them to talk. Because even if you have doubts about it, talking about it really helps. It frees you from the burden of having to carry your worries alone, realizing that you do not have to carry them around with you alone any longer, and at the same time helps you to express your feelings verbally. But you have to really want it Zoro, otherwise this therapy is pointless."  
"I know that, and I want to. I just don't know how."  
"The beginning is always difficult, so I want to try out something different. I want you to record your experiences on a tape recorder. Tell it, whatever comes to your mind. Just for yourself and no one else. You don't have to give these tapes to anyone either, I'll even give you a lockable box to put everything in so no one but you, has access to your thoughts, okay? What do you think? Do you want to try it?"  
Shanks waited patiently for Zoro's answer, who seemed anything but convinced by the idea. Still, they had to find a way for Zoro to talk, because it was not enough for him to just listen to the others, he had to be active as well if he wanted to get his problems under control, but that would only work if he was open and honest with himself and admitted his problems so he could be helped.  
Tentatively and almost unimpressively, Zoro's head finally bobbed up and down and Shanks smiled, glad that he wanted to give it a chance. Shanks asked him to follow him into his office and handed him a Dictaphone, as well as 5 small cassettes and a nicely decorated wooden box to put the items in before handing the key to Zoro.   
"One more thing: I'd like to try something new with you, if you agree."  
"And that would be?" Zoro asked suspiciously.  
"Hypnosis. I'd like to take you into your dreams to help you cope with them better."  
"And how?"  
"Have you ever heard of lucid dreaming?"  
"No."  
"Well, it's basically learning to consciously control your dreams. In a positive direction, for example."   
"What exactly is that supposed to look like?"  
"Well, first, your brain has to recognize that everything is just a dream and not really happening right now. And once you have managed that, you can work on consciously controlling the things that happen to you in your dreams."  
Zoro looked sceptical, but Shanks insisted that they should at least try and suggested they start the first session in a week. The green-haired man promised to think about it and thoughtfully left the therapist's office to change for squash practice, because sports were still the best way for him to clear his head. For two hours he ran after the ball like a maniac, scaring the other players so much with his aggressive style of play that they became frightened and finally gave up. Except for Pudding who ran after him when he retreated to his room. Growling, Zoro threw the bathroom door shut behind him to take a shower and to signal to Pudding that she had better fuck off, but she didn't and sat down on the only chair in the room. Fifteen minutes later, the bathroom door opened again and a Zoro stepped out of the misty haze naked. Awkwardly, Pudding squirmed back and forth in her seat, lowering her gaze as Zoro, rubbing his head dry with a towel, walked past her, and tossed some clothes from his closet onto the bed.  
"What do you want?" Zoro inquired as he dressed. Pudding kept her gaze fixed downward and told Zoro that she was worried because she knew what it was like to feel so ashamed that you could not talk about something.  
"I felt the same way before I came here. I felt ashamed because, although I was an adult, I was still dependent all these years on my mother, who shamelessly exploited my lack of independence to keep me and my other siblings tied to her, for fear of one day looking old and alone. And although I was aware of this, I just could not get away from her because I believed I could not live alone, I was downright afraid to leave my parents' house and so I stayed. Until one day my older brother decided to leave us to finally live his own life. After that, he secretly kept in touch with me and finally encouraged me to break away from our mother and that he wanted to help me. At first, I was terribly afraid, but he assured me that I was not alone and that he would always be there for me and even got me this therapy place and an apartment, right under his, so that I could learn to cope on my own.  
The beginning here was difficult for me, because I felt very lonely without my family, my brother, and at first, I did not dare to talk about my past, for fear that the others might laugh at me and judge me, thinking that I was a failure, but they did not. On the contrary, everyone was very understanding and sweet and just listened and shared their fears and worries with me as well. Because that is what it's all about, sharing the grief with each other, supporting each other, in the fight against our problems. We are not your enemies Zoro, but your allies. We would like to help you, but we can't do it without your help."  
Zoro had sat down on the bed, his arms folded in front of his chest, while he listened to her, and slowly lowered his arms more and more, until they finally hung down relaxed from his upper body. Startled, Pudding pulled up when she looked at her wristwatch and saw how late it was.  
"Oh dear, I must hurry, my backing class is about to start. Today we're going to learn how to make eclairs." She jumped up and apologized for having to leave so suddenly.   
"No problem. Thank you," Zoro said, and Pudding thought she saw a small smile.  
"No, I´m the one who should be thanking you. For listening. Will I see you tomorrow in group therapy?"  
Zoro nodded and Pudding left the room. The mosshead flopped back on his bed, reached into the back pocket of his jeans with his right hand, and fished out his cell phone, on which he found another dozen message from Luffy, Chopper, Ussop, Franky, and Vivi, but he ignored them and opened his picture gallery instead, scrolling through until he finally found what he was looking for. The chef's smile was so warm and heartfelt that Zoro could not take his eyes off it and leaned his phone against his pillow to contemplate the picture for a while, until finally his eyes fell shut and he escaped into his dream world, returning to those bittersweet memories when everything was still okay.

Frustrated, Alfred Pennyworth hung up again and cursed under his breath. He still could not believe that he had made this mistake. He was usually very thorough in his work, but this time he had made a bad mistake that he did not know how to make up for. He had been unable to reach Mr. Vinsmoke or his partner, so he had only one option. Alfred Pennyworth reached into the drawer of his desk and took out a padded brown envelope, which he labelled and put sufficient postage on. It might not be right, but he saw no other way to contact them, so he could only hope that they would forgive his mistake once they received the envelope.

Zoro could literally feel the therapist's eyes patiently waiting to see if anyone volunteered to tell anything and quickly came forward before changing his mind. Stunned but pleased at the same time, Shanks registered Zoro's raised arm and looked at him expectantly, as did all the other participants. All night Zoro had been thinking about how to tell the cook, how to find the courage to confess to him what had happened to him as a child, but when he imagined that the cook was here and would listen to him now, his heart almost slipped down to the bottom and a thick lump formed in his throat, taking away his breath.   
Damn it, why was it so hard for him to tell the cook the truth? Zoro swallowed and moistened his dry lips with his tongue. His voice was monotone, resembling a tape rattling off events, like a newscaster reading his text from a teleprompter. Only his hands, buried deep in his thighs, betrayed his tension and the horror he felt as he recalled that time, those horrors he had wanted to forget, and which were now all coming back up. He would have liked to jump up and run away, but he simply could not, for the memories overwhelmed him with such force that he froze in fear. Nevertheless, Zoro could no longer hold back the words, it was as if they just bubbled out of him, as if his soul were trying to free itself from a heavy burden that had crushed him all these years.  
"I'm angry, so infinitely angry, because... even after all these years, I still haven't managed to break away from my father. He dominates my dreams, my thoughts, my whole damn life, without me being able to do anything about it. I don't know how to get rid of him and it makes me so angry, I feel like I'm suffocating from my helplessness, drowning in this vicious cycle”, Zoro sobbed as his whole body began to shake uncontrollably.


End file.
